Really professional, for real.

December 27th, 2009 · 39 comments

Writes our (only slightly embittered) submitter in Connecticut: “My coworker works the receiving department in a car parts warehouse. Even though he works in a warehouse he likes to pretend he works in an office by sitting at his workstation all day working on ‘problems.’ He put this up because apparently people actually doing work were drowning out his Rush Limbaugh broadcast.”

This is a real office with people trying to be real professional.

related: just sayin’

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→ 39 CommentsFILED UNDER: bold underlined italics · noise · spelling and grammar police


Happy Boxing Day from Passive-Aggressive Notes!

December 26th, 2009 · 44 comments

Now, if you wouldn’t mind taking a moment out of your busy schedule of sport and/or shopping to bestow a bit of charity on those you live with?

This is a passive-aggressive note from your kitchen buddy/rugby player Colin!

(Cheers to our submitter Victoria, her mates at Oxford, and their disgusting flatties.)

related: ceci n’est pas une note passif-agressif

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→ 44 CommentsFILED UNDER: meta · roommates · that shit is disgusting · u.k.


Right, He just went round the corner for a quick nip.

December 25th, 2009 · 46 comments

Write Sara in Cardiff, Wales: “Around this time last year, I noticed that the Jesus had been stolen from this city centre church’s Nativity scene. The Church is surrounded by pubs and, as it can get quite messy in Cardiff on the weekend, it’s no surprise Jesus went AWOL. About a week later, the note was still up, and someone had replaced ‘Jesus’ with an old naked ragdoll.”

DESPITE HIS ENEMIES, baby JESUS WILL BE COMING BACK SOON

(And can I just repeat how much I love this Wikipedia entry? It’s the Christmas gift that keeps on giving.)

related: What if someone like you had stolen Baby Jesus’s Lean Cuisine?

extra credit: Someone stole Baby Jesus

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→ 46 CommentsFILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · holiday spirit · jesus · wales


Merry Christmas to one and all (except you)

December 23rd, 2009 · 61 comments

So, has holiday time with the fam driven you to the bottle yet? Before you head out to happy hour, just remember that Christmas is no excuse for pub owners to mince words.

Just ask Finlay in Edinburgh, Scotland…

Merry Christmas to one and all (except you)

Or Ross in Wellington, New Zealand…

Due to Udit being a douche the Cavern Club Christmas party has been cancelled.

And for the rest of us…Happy Festivus, Troublemakers! May your airing of grievances be merrily aggressive-aggressive.

related: we will be happy to service your hangover on January 1

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→ 61 CommentsFILED UNDER: holiday spirit · new zealand · scotland


The Trans-Hadean Orchestra

December 22nd, 2009 · 201 comments

At college, more often than not, your sex life is everybody’s business. But don’t worry…it’s for your own good! For example, the writer of this first note (as spotted by Ashley at Missouri State) displays a heartwarming concern for her dorm-mate’s physical safety.

You and your boyfriend need to tone down the devil's orchestra

And as Vic and his friends at Arizona State’s Barrett Honors College discovered, a group calling themselves “the Gods of ASU” has even deeper concerns….the fate of your everlasting soul!!!

don't keep warm with PRE-MARITAL SEX or you'll have plenty of heat IN HELL

related: “I know that it’s really none of my business, but…I’m going to tell you what I think anyway.”

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→ 201 CommentsFILED UNDER: MYOB · arizona · jesus · missouri · sex sex sex · university · unsolicited feedback


Sometimes, Mom is (actually, maybe, a little bit) right.

December 21st, 2009 · 133 comments

Writes our submitter in Lexington, Kentucky: “One day, I updated my Facebook status to something about how no one in my city knows how to properly use a turning lane. The next day, I got this e-mail from my mom. She often makes similar judgments about what personality traits I should have because I’m ‘such a pretty girl.’”

Annoying? Sure. But aside from the irritating Momsian/Victorian conflation of physical/moral beauty, I think I’m actually on Team Mom for this one. (Of course, had I received a similar e-mail from my own mom, I’d hardly be so clear-eyed. Such is the nature of the mother/daughter dynamic!)

Honey, I wish you wouldn't post such negative comments on Facebook. Love, Mom

related: living with an adolescent, abridged

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→ 133 CommentsFILED UNDER: e-mail · facebook · moms & dads · not so much passive-aggressive · signed with love · unsolicited feedback


Stuff this in your stocking, sister.

December 20th, 2009 · 130 comments

Gift-giving is what makes Christmas the passive-aggressive’s favorite time of year. It’s a priceless opportunity to show your friends and family how you really feel about them…with a bow on top!

These notecards are for writing nice notes your sisters

A gift of organization for your un-organized soul

related: putting the “x” in “x-mas”

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→ 130 CommentsFILED UNDER: family · holiday spirit


Vindictive much?

December 19th, 2009 · 104 comments

Writes James in Chesterfield, Virginia: “Poor Fayette didn’t know that you must remove staples before feeding paper into the copier. Even though she is 70 years old and always brings fresh brownies on Fridays for everyone in the office, someone still felt the need to publicly (and anonymously) humiliate her.”

You know, because a simple “the copier is broken” would leave just too many unanswered questions.

Yes, Fayette broke the copier.

related: Graham, this means you

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→ 104 CommentsFILED UNDER: office · oh no you didn't · virginia