Hey, Dumbo

May 21st, 2013 · 5 comments

As it turns out, a surprisingly large number of American apartment buildings are pachyderm-friendly. (It’s the owners that are the problem, of course.)

Shh! Please walk your elephant quietly!

Dear neighbor, Do you look like this? If not then please stop jumping around. Sincerely, Person Below You

Please clean up after your elephant!

Dear Beach Girl, The elephant you're training keeps sitting on my Jetta. Also, your nunchuck stance is distracting passing motorists. Regards, Wilson

related: How now, Mad Cow?

→ 5 CommentsFILED UNDER: neighbors · noise · shit


For heaven’s sake, Steve

May 20th, 2013 · 24 comments

Spotted by Leonora in the window of a London office:

STOP SPITTING ON THE WINDOWS STEVE

related: Do not kiss on someone else’s kiss — and absolutely NO LICKING

→ 24 CommentsFILED UNDER: London · spitting


Presenting the new Mercedes-Benz No-Class

May 16th, 2013 · 78 comments

Writes our submitter in Brisbane, Australia: “It wasn’t me that reported the rich guy to the council, but it sure gave me a few laughs.”

To whom it may concern, Thank you so much for having my car booked today. You must have nothing better to do than make petty complaints to council. Never mind it is only $100, I make that much in half an hour every day. You must not be a very good driver if you were not able to get out of your driveway that had about 3 meters of room still available. I could have easily driven in and out of there without any issue with the huge amount of space left. Perhaps you should re-sit your driving exams again? I think you are jealous I have a new Mercedes-Benz and you don't? You do not seem to be very well educated in that you can not even spell inconsiderate. Kind regards, A Mercedes-Benz Driver

related: I know, all black sedans look the same

extra credit: This Is Why People Think Mercedes-Benz Drivers Are Asshats [jalopnik.com]

→ 78 CommentsFILED UNDER: Australia · car · money · parking · thanks (but not really)


Tacky, you say?

May 15th, 2013 · 33 comments

Explains our submitter in Chicago: “Colleague A left the following note — an attempt to enforce an ambigious personal space decoration policy via shame — on Colleague B’s Eiffel Tower clip. (Note: Colleague A has no official authority over Colleague B.) I find the phrasing both poetic and hilarious.”

THIS EIFFEL TOWER IS TACKY. DON'T PUT IT ON TOP.

related: Do not lean on my pod!!!

→ 33 CommentsFILED UNDER: a matter of taste · Chicago · office · office cop