a single unit

May 12th, 2007 · 20 comments

from an auto shop somewhere between new york and atlantic city…

a single unit

at first glace, this doesn’t seem to fit the criteria for a true passive-aggressive note — observe the absence of faux niceties like “please” or “thanks!!!”– but the pseudo-helpful clarification (”this means pants + shirts as a single unit…”) help inch it just over the line.

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FILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · attire · jersey · office · whiteboard

20 responses so far ↓

  • #1  rrpa

    I think (hope) the word they’re looking for is “coveralls.” I really don’t want to imagine mechanics prancing around in unitards.

    May 25, 2007 at 5:32 pm   rating: +7  

    • #1.1  Simon

      Speak for yourself!

      Jul 24, 2008 at 2:26 pm   rating: +2  

       
     
  • #2  GhostWriter

    This hidden gem screams for recurrence, as in:
    “Mishee, that was your fifth typo today- now you must wear the unitard!”
    Join the campaign to unseat “fucking delicious” in 2008!

    Nov 15, 2007 at 8:49 am   rating: +3  

    • #2.1  Balti

      Team Fucking Delicious

      Mar 17, 2008 at 1:34 pm   rating: +3  

       
     
  • #3  Mishee

    I am actually more concerned about the other note at the bottom.

    If the sign is flickering it could be an electrical hazard.

    These guys are all in the locker room changing into their unitards, this sign blows up and takes half of the downtown shopping district with it.

    All those soccer moms at Starbucks… oh the humanity…

    Nov 15, 2007 at 10:06 am   rating: +3  

     
  • #4  Troy McClure

    Count me in, GW! I was wondering what, precisely, “you must wear the unitard” should mean, and realised that the truth must lie in anagrams. With a bit of help (okay, a lot of help) from http://wordsmith.org/anagram/advanced.html
    I have come up with the following possibilities:

    You are a student with rum

    You are matured with nuts

    You are amid West Untruth (a real town in Wales, apparently)

    You unearthed a rum twist

    and I think my favourite:

    You are Untruth’s wet maid.

    Which is it? I’ll defer to you, GW.

    Nov 15, 2007 at 10:14 am   rating: 0  

     
  • #5  GVI

    At least they don’t have to wear leotards, so they should be thankful.

    Nov 15, 2007 at 10:16 am   rating: +1  

     
  • #6  Mishee

    I also wonder what the Training Pants & Shirt look like…

    I am thinking like, Pull-Ups, but pants and shirt of course.

    Nov 15, 2007 at 10:21 am   rating: +4  

     
  • #7  GhostWriter

    GVI: Leo wears the leotard, and now you must wear the Unitard.

    OMG- I think we haveto go with the secret meaning, “You are Untruth’s wet maid”! Think of the possibilities- whenever someone adds some outlandish comment that everybody knows could never have happened, and yet they insist that id did happen… “I’m sorry Claw71, but you must now wear the unitard!” It totally replaces “calling Bullshit” on someone.

    Nov 15, 2007 at 10:22 am   rating: +1  

     
  • #8  GhostWriter

    I am chuckling to myself, picturing Mayor Quimby ordering, “You mawst weeahh tha Unitahhd!!”

    Nov 15, 2007 at 10:41 am   rating: +1  

     
  • #9  Carole

    Unitard = UNIform for reTARDs?

    Nov 19, 2007 at 10:50 pm   rating: +2  

    • #9.1  RunBarbara

      That would be a Ree-i-tard.

      Apr 19, 2008 at 7:31 pm   rating: +1  

       
     
  • #10  adrienne

    I am more bothered by the fact some mechanics are wearing training pants.

    Feb 21, 2008 at 6:25 pm   rating: +1  

     
  • #11  laura

    i’m pretty sure it originally said ‘uniform’ and someone came along, erased ‘form’ and put in ‘tard,’ then added the bit about “as a single unit.” The note was originally written in uppercase, and the joker rewrote it with lower case.

    Apr 21, 2008 at 3:27 am   rating: +5  

     
  • #12  SoapMonster

    I had to wear a unitard as a Fury in my college’s rendition of “The Eumenides.” It was skintight from wrist to ankle. Once we got over the initial mortification of having every individual curve greatly emphasized, we had lots of fun slinking around in them and calling each other “unitarded.” Oh, the days. . .

    Apr 28, 2008 at 1:02 pm   rating: 0  

     
  • #13  Mishee

    Personally, I would be more concerned that the southbound price sign is flickering!

    That could be a fire hazard at worst, and an advertising hazard at best!

    Apr 28, 2008 at 1:19 pm   rating: 0  

     
  • #14  Big JIM

    Dear Editor/submitter/internet idea siphoner,
    I am an old guy, turned 55 last week. Read about
    your website in BW this morning and first time
    ever blogger. Had lots of laughs reading the posted comments, they reminded me how funny impassioned people are. Glad to hear you were able to quit you day job at BW for more fun work. Keep the faith-Big JIM

    May 25, 2008 at 9:03 am   rating: +1  

     
  • #15  artstarr

    unitards are for squares

    Jun 1, 2008 at 2:18 am   rating: 0  

    • #15.1  Crash

      I’d like to see a unitard fit on a square :?

      Jun 1, 2008 at 2:29 am   rating: +3  

       
     
  • #16  http://hopefulnebula.livejournal.com/

    Fifteen top-level comments, and nobody’s noticed the apostrophe in ’’employees.’’ Which it looks like somebody corrected after the fact.

    I weep. Won’t somebody think of the poor apostrophes that came in from the cold? They need good homes! Not bad homes like this!

    (Also, sorry about the URL as the name. I was an idiot and didn’t pay attention to what fields said what.)

    Jul 29, 2008 at 10:31 am   rating: 0  

     

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