this card came with a box of homemade mandelbrot from my very own passive-aggressive jewish grandmother.
EMAIL THIS POST TO A PAL!
too many
May 12th, 2007 · 20 comments
EMAIL THIS POST TO A PAL!
FILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · exclamation-point happy! · family · food
20 responses so far ↓
#1 rx
Your grandmother bakes you fractals?
May 21, 2007 at 8:46 pm rating: +3
#2 that means you, freda « passive-aggressive notes from roommates, neighbors, coworkers and strangers
[...] senior center in maryville, missouri. it seems a bit futile, really. i know that no sign would stop my grandmother from putting in her two [...]
May 21, 2007 at 10:51 pm rating: 0
#3 Jacqueline
omg…that’s my mother in law! I get weight loss cookbooks from her as gifts.
A hint cleverly disguised as a gift.
May 24, 2007 at 7:46 am rating: 0
#4 hymes
“You’re eating again?!”, said 5 hours after I last ate.
A female relative who shall remain nameless.
May 24, 2007 at 11:00 pm rating: 0
#5 Maz
Just be glad your bubby still bakes for you!
May 29, 2007 at 11:22 pm rating: 0
#6 Misty
Gee, I hardly eat at all, this from my 2 daughters in law and my daughter who weigh as much as a small country.
Jun 1, 2007 at 2:44 pm rating: +1
#7 Mishee
I wonder if the cookies were fucking delicious….
Nov 12, 2007 at 10:06 pm rating: 0
#8 Mishee
I went online and found the recipe for these cookies:
2 c. double meanings
3/4 c thinly veiled put downs (finely chopped)
2 tsp of vanilla (’cause everything needs vanilla)
a dash of guilt
and a dollop of love (of course, ’cause they only say those things because they care)
Enjoy! (but don’t eat too many!)
Nov 15, 2007 at 12:43 am rating: +6
#9 Canthz_B
Wait, is this some type of bread? If so substitute “bread” for “cookies” and “it” for “them” in number ten.
Sorry, I’d never heard of it and went on comment #9. A quick google found bread recipies and fractile equations!
Nov 15, 2007 at 1:28 am rating: 0
#10 Canthz_B
“Here’s a box of guilt bread, Chunky-butt. Enjoy it, I’ll be watching your buttocks grow!”
Good PANLord I hope it’s some type of bread!
Nov 15, 2007 at 1:39 am rating: 0
#11 Mishee
CB - I had the same issue with the google search. I found that adding “recipe” at the end of the search terms got rid of all the pesky fractile equation results. It’s some kind of cookie….
Nov 15, 2007 at 9:56 am rating: 0
#12 AntiNickname
My Jewish mother has sent me an entire cake with a card that had a fat woman eating a huge ice cream cone on the front. The inside said “Share this with your friends!”
I love that my mother thinks that upon receiving an entire cake, I’d quickly run into my dorm room, lock the door, and devour the entire thing all by myself.
Nov 15, 2007 at 2:06 pm rating: 0
#13 laure
CB: It literally means ‘almond bread,’ but it’s like biscotti.
Nov 15, 2007 at 3:23 pm rating: 0
#14 e*c
CB: it’s actually “mandel bread,” a bread-like dessert made for passover. it’s literally the heaviest, densest cake you’ll ever find, since it’s made with matzo meal and does not rise.
it’s also sinfully delicious (when made correctly), and takes twice as long to burn off at the gym.
Nov 21, 2007 at 11:28 am rating: 0
#15 jewlicious
e*c — while it’s typically pronounced “mandel bread,” the correct spelling is actually “mandelbrot,” which as laure points out, literally means “almond bread.”
Nov 21, 2007 at 4:45 pm rating: 0
#16 Chaim
Being a Jew myself, I’ve noticed that Jews seem to have more food issues than any other normal people you’d care to mention. Not that Jews aren’t “normal”- I just mean other people without medically diagnosed food issues, like bulimia or food allergies. Oh, geez, this has gone on long enough and I’m due back at my old Hebrew School. We’re breaking in a new Rabbi and I’m bringing him a very fancy new Talit, which I hope he likes. I’m very nervous about it because a Rabbi can, you know, make life very difficult for a young man of my age in the community. I was going to also maybe include a bottle of Manischewitz maybe but who am I to assume?
Anyhoo, I really have got to go. Many Jewish “Hellos” from your friend Chaim. To my Goyish friends out there, might I maybe suggest a little love for your friends of the Semitic persuasion maybe? Be good to your mothers and Go Mets!
Apr 10, 2008 at 2:00 pm rating: 0
#17 why is it that on this night we’re, like, allowed to eat carbs?
[...] gotta love my grandma cookie — she’s always looking out for my [...]
Apr 20, 2008 at 12:38 am rating: 0
#18 Wade
I still think it is funny that Kerry gets advice about overeating… from Grandma Cookie!
Happy PAN Day!!
May 12, 2008 at 8:03 am rating: 0
#19 Mishee
Ahhhh, aren’t anniversaries just wonderful?
Maybe Grandma Cookie can bake you some mandelbrot to commemorate the occasion.
(It’s totally amazing how much PAN has grown in the past year! Kerry - you ROCK!)
May 12, 2008 at 10:40 am rating: 0
#20 #20
Hooray! Number 20!
Leave a comment (but don’t leave too much).
Jul 28, 2008 at 1:33 am rating: 0
Leave a Comment