from an anonymous submitter in new york city, who explains: “i was out of the country for a week, and when I came back, I found this gem taped to the bathroom mirror….even though I’ve since moved out of the apartment (after she accused me of peeing on the bathroom floor and into the non-existent bathroom air freshener, and I decided I couldn’t take any more of her), she’s still around (we go to the same school), so I don’t want her to accidentally stumble upon this and cause me more hell.”
reddit!
stumble it!
22 responses so far ↓
#1 Anhoni
hm….all good points.
Jun 1, 2007 at 12:44 pm rating: 0
#2 Michael
I love how it begins with “Pig,” (not even a “dear pig” or “hi pig” to soften the blow).
Jun 1, 2007 at 1:14 pm rating: 0
#3 hopefulgirl
i really like the author’s vocabulary. putrid is a wonderful word.
Jun 1, 2007 at 1:37 pm rating: 0
#4 tanglethis
I don’t know who to believe… I’ve had some bathroom-hygiene delusional roommates in my time, but I’m not banking on the anonymous sender.
Jun 1, 2007 at 2:23 pm rating: 0
#5 Chris
It’s a work of art.
Jun 1, 2007 at 2:27 pm rating: 0
#6 puddlehead
I would love to be accused of peeing in the air freshener, especially if it didn’t exist. What skill!
Jun 1, 2007 at 3:36 pm rating: 0
#7 I Peed
I had an old roommate who used to accuse me of peeing on the floor, but I always used to pee sitting down so I could read at the same time — not that I could ever tell them that.
Jun 1, 2007 at 4:49 pm rating: 0
#8 joebec
i like the pointing out of the positives like making the shit IN the toilet! way to go!
Jun 1, 2007 at 4:56 pm rating: 0
#9 Awesome blog « The Road To Happiness
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Jun 1, 2007 at 7:23 pm rating: 0
#10 jalix
how charming…
i agree with joebec. the patronising is priceless.
Jun 2, 2007 at 5:07 am rating: 0
#11 Ms. Anonymous
I’m the “anonymous” person who submitted this note.
tanglethis: I’m no bathroom Jesus, but I most definitely didn’t leave anything behind me when I was finished. Besides, being a girl, peeing on the floor would require certain acrobatic feats that I’m not exactly capable of.
Speaking of bathroom hygiene, this girl also ripped down the shower curtain (even after I tried to replace it several times), and then accused me when the bathroom smelled dank from all the standing water on the bathroom floor. Ah, roommates.
Jun 2, 2007 at 8:56 pm rating: +1
#12 Collaroy
I LOVE that note! I don’t know if it’s deserved or not but I love the way it’s written. 9/10
Jun 4, 2007 at 2:42 am rating: 0
#13 i've seen girls do it
I have a female friend that always pisses on the seat when she is over, I even proved it by making sure I was the person in before and after she was. Piss all over the underside of the toilet seat and down the front of the toilet until it pools on the floor.
Of course, I’m not going to complain to her about it. BUT at least I now know that girls are capable of pure evil.
Jun 7, 2007 at 12:53 pm rating: 0
#14 Chani
“being a girl, peeing on the floor would require certain acrobatic feats that I’m not exactly capable of.”
not true. my university’s bathrooms boggle the mind… I really don’t understand how girls can be so messy.
Jun 26, 2007 at 5:14 am rating: 0
#15 wzel
“being a girl, peeing on the floor would require certain acrobatic feats I’m not exactly capable of.”
Actually, that’s only true if the girl in question wants to make a *ahem* clean getaway.
Two possibilities: girl in question just pees over everything (self included), or, she’s wearing a skirt and no panties, and just squats (obviously not on the toilet). I clean college bathrooms. Girls can be just as skeevy and nasty as boys. Sometimes, more so.
Oh wait…what about male visitors?
Jul 8, 2007 at 7:28 am rating: 0
#16 sugarbat
Ms. Anonymous: I love “bathroom Jesus.”
Jul 17, 2007 at 7:54 pm rating: 0
#17 Aaron
I love this note for so many reasons…
1. The opening salvo of ‘pig.’ Just gets right into the thick of it.
2. The tone. How the writer mixes a instructional-patronizing ephemera with the dirt and the shit.
3. That I relate. Not that I think that the writer here should have gone into letter mode, but I lived with a woman in college who shed horse-hair and eight-inch long pubes in the bathroom. To walk on the stall was like giving Snuffleupagus an Oriental massage treatment. She used to write me greetings with her horse-hair, using the soap scum as glue, expertly writing words. So I kind of feel the writer’s pain here. Most of these are funny because its people making a mountain out of a molehill. Yet, if you’ve ever lived with a person with questionable personal hygene…
Sep 14, 2007 at 3:58 pm rating: 0
#18 ChiefQuimby
I had girl who could pee 24 foot across the yard or in the park. Women can shoot powerfull streams of liquid quite a distance. If you sit on the toilit and your hips are pushed forward and not down like duck shape the the spray will end up going to the edge of the toilit. Its possible. The note however does not mention peeing on floor at all. So I beleive the not is written in good faith.
Nov 3, 2007 at 2:17 pm rating: 0
#19 Mishee
That McDonalds was fucking delicious…
Nov 3, 2007 at 2:31 pm rating: 0
#20 Mishee
Anon Submitter - she will find out you posted it, somehow… they always do…
The internet is a lot smaller than it seems!
Nov 3, 2007 at 2:33 pm rating: 0
#21 wow, indeed.
[...] let me help you out digg_skin = ‘compact’; reddit! stumble it! function [...]
Dec 4, 2007 at 12:54 pm rating: 0
#22 (or burn)
[...] let me help you out digg_skin = ‘compact’; reddit! stumble it! function [...]
Feb 12, 2008 at 12:37 am rating: 0
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