May the sanctity of the sink prevail!!

June 14th, 2007 · 93 comments

My esteemed housemates, I have some unfortunate news to report. It appears that our ongoing experiment to see if the dishes would indeed wash themselves has ended and ultimately failed.

(From Midgy in Madison, Wisconsin.)

related: With 17 roommates, it could have been worse

FILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · dishes · not-so-veiled threats · p.s. · rhetorical question · roommates · sarcasm · spelling and grammar police · TL;DR · Wisconsin


93 responses so far ↓

  • #1   jfruh

    Wow, this may be the most passively-aggressive (or aggressively passive?) note ever. So awesome.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 6:07 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

     
  • #2   missrisky

    Brilliant! I particularly love the XOXO after “I will kill you in your sleep.” Makes the threat sound more thoughtful.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 6:13 am   rating: 25  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   Henrik

    But wait!

    Doesn’t it look like a note got taped over with this big note?

    I wonder what was on that one? I bet that note contained a kind reference to the huge amount of unclean kitchen utensils!

    Jun 14, 2007 at 6:24 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   james bollington

    classic, this guy’s really angry!!

    Jun 14, 2007 at 6:59 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   thordora

    Wow. Just, WOW.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 7:29 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   Cranky

    I want to marry the author of this note and discuss dishes at length.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 7:44 am   rating: 36  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Kerri

    This is, by far, my favorite note yet!! Hands down!!

    Jun 14, 2007 at 7:45 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   Linda

    The best ever. I love how he will dump the dishes on the floor! I was laughing at the end. This boy is definitely NOT passive aggressive, but his note is.

    Great job!

    Jun 14, 2007 at 7:58 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   amber

    I love it. I’m going to study it and learn from it.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 8:44 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   Mel

    “elaborate gourmet dinners”? where’s my invite?

    this note takes it, way overboard!

    classic.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 8:50 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Meeg

    Now that’s passive aggressive!

    Jun 14, 2007 at 9:05 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   Agargara

    Excellent example of passive-aggressiveness. Though Eric probably believes all his assumed pretentious wordiness at the beginning makes him sound smart, it has the opposite effect.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 9:14 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   kate

    Wow. Gold medal.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 9:25 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   hopefulgirl

    Yeah, I kind of have a crush on this guy. Rather witty.

    And it was a good mix of passive aggressiveness, humor and sarcasm- so if I was his roommate I would probably be mad, laugh, and then do my dishes.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 9:27 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Tim

    That is AWESOME. I think there should be a feature on this site to rate notes, because this one goes all the way up to 11.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 9:37 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Erin

    I bet this guy is awesome to be around. this has to be the best ever. Love it!

    Jun 14, 2007 at 9:51 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   mothmanbr

    THIS IS THE BEST NOTE EVER! YES I HAD TO YELL THAT!

    Jun 14, 2007 at 10:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   Jill

    I think this must be the sequel, with the paper hanging up behind this note. ‘Wonder what that one says….
    This one is great though…

    Jun 14, 2007 at 10:08 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   David

    “Though Eric probably believes all his assumed pretentious wordiness at the beginning makes him sound smart, it has the opposite effect.”

    Agargara – I think the wordiness was for comic effect. What a great note!

    Jun 14, 2007 at 10:42 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   LQP

    So many things about this note make it genius. Right now I’m a little in love with the “xoxo” after the “I will kill you in my sleep.” However, I don’t get the part about “intestines.”

    Maybe Eric would give permission to put this on a T-shirt? I’d wear it.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 11:56 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Midge

    i don’t understand why the guy has a problem with there being dishes in the sink at all. sure, if it’s a huge pile and you can’t even use the faucet… but the guy is like, “if you put even one dish in the sink at any time, i will throw it on the floor.” wow, pull the wooden spoon out of your ass, guy.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 11:59 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   Potbelly

    This guy is the king.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 12:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   mothmanbr

    @Midge: If the dirty dishes are laying around, then maybe the person who left them dirty will clean them.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 1:20 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   guttercup

    This HAS to be the best, by far. I want to have his sarcastic babies.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 2:06 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Marc

    If I had a roommate that amusing, I’d do his dishes for a month, happily. There are notes, and then there are Dostoevskian epics disguised as notes. And this guy just produced the ‘Notes from Underground’ of helpful notices to all housemates everywhere.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 4:55 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   saellys

    Having gone through exactly the same thing, I find myself irresistibly attracted to this man. I would like to do his dishes, ifyaknowwhatImean.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 5:41 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   Writer, Rejected

    Seriously, this roomie has just earned a right to never suds a plate again. Your website dwarfs mine. http://literaryrejectionsondisplay.blogspot.com/

    Jun 14, 2007 at 6:03 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Catsoup

    Wowza. I wanna hang out with this guy.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 6:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #29   JoeDrinker

    Holy crap. He could have moved into a new place in the time it took to look up those words and write that tome.

    Jun 14, 2007 at 8:30 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Irish

    Hilarious note, for sure but the whole throwing the dishes on the floor/around the house thing? Man, that sounds like an invite to roaches & ants!

    Eww… lol

    Jun 14, 2007 at 8:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   Stephanie

    Best. Note. Ever. heeheeheehee

    Jun 14, 2007 at 10:25 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #32   Eleanor

    Epic

    Jun 15, 2007 at 3:36 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   Howard K.

    Brilliant.

    “How’s that for an instestine, Benson” could easily become the new “All your base”. Where do I get the bumpersticker?

    Jun 15, 2007 at 7:37 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   joebec

    that is great! i especially like how he finished up the death threat with the “xoxo” hugs and kisses. firm but fair!

    Jun 15, 2007 at 8:46 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   Anonymous Geek

    Well… the same person wrote the note underneath it (check out the letters you can see, they’re the same). I wonder what that one said…

    Jun 15, 2007 at 11:47 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   James K

    I lived in this house. It got pretty hostile fo ra while. Another of my old roommates posted the pic.

    There were others in this series. I’ll post them if I can find some pictures (I think we even saved the notes).

    Jun 15, 2007 at 3:29 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   willb

    I soooo want the tee shirt that says “How’s that for an intestine, Benson?” or “I will kill you in your sleep. xoxo”
    passiveaggressivenotes.com keeper, you should make that happen; the best quotes on a tee shirt. http://www.zazzle.com/

    I also would buy one that said “may the sanctity of the sink prevail.” awesome.

    Jun 15, 2007 at 7:14 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   i'mwonderful

    i wanna make out with this guy. and have his awesome babies.

    i’ll kill you in your sleep. xoxo

    Jun 16, 2007 at 12:00 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   jiffy

    you should see him when he’s drunk

    Jun 16, 2007 at 1:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   theobviouschild

    I second willb’s suggestion: t-shirts with slogans from posts on this site. What an original marketing concept!

    Jun 16, 2007 at 7:44 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   Graham

    Best. Passive-aggressive. Note. Ever.

    Jun 17, 2007 at 9:55 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   matty

    This guy is now famous. The Guardian newspaper in the UK printed this note on p2 on Saturday June 16th 2007.

    Jun 18, 2007 at 2:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Marek

    OMG. I’m so happy. There are tears in my eyes.

    This note may have saved my marriage.

    Naah. But, it’s really good. Best yet.

    Jun 19, 2007 at 7:54 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   Melis

    This is brilliant and classic. Thanks for the huge smile for the best note so far.

    Jun 26, 2007 at 7:04 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   SoPassive

    God i just want to kiss him, lol, this the be note ever! my fav part is the “Suttle” but deadly threat at the end. its so funny.

    Jun 28, 2007 at 10:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   SoPassive

    God i just want to kiss him, lol, this has to be the note ever! my fav part is the “Suttle” but deadly threat at the end. its so funny.

    Jun 28, 2007 at 10:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   RaggDolly121

    Jeez, he’s like my mom!

    Jul 2, 2007 at 2:09 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   Christina

    Brilliant. Absolutley brilliant. There are no words that could accurately describe the sheer imagination and wit that went behind this masterpiece. If this guy was a band, he’d be The Beatles, Mozart and Prince all rolled into one.

    Jul 3, 2007 at 5:50 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   Sherlock

    I think maybe that’s Eric’s first note about the dishes we can see sticking out underneath this one. Benson probably made some crack about the first one being long as an intestine…
    Bad move, Benson.

    PS: Midge, a sink is not a holding bay for dirty dishes, there should only be dishes in a sink when they are being washed. The rest of the time the sink should be kept empty so other people can use it. xoxo

    Jul 5, 2007 at 8:25 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #50   It's the principle!

    haha. This is GREAT! May the sanctity of the sink prevail!

    Jul 5, 2007 at 9:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #51   Serpentina Solis

    Absolutely the most beautiful thing I have ever seen………………………………

    Jul 11, 2007 at 10:19 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #52   Nigel

    I’ve lived this… I feel for him.

    Jul 13, 2007 at 10:21 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   Paul

    intestines – is probably refering to his gut.

    they probably thought he didn’t have the guts to do it. “shrugs”

    Jul 13, 2007 at 1:43 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #54   glyonline

    whohhhw!!its brilliant!i love the author!!mabuhay!!

    Jul 13, 2007 at 2:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #55   Libradiva

    I can’t help but love such a smart ass! Being a mom of three kids (my 10yr old and 15 yr old are completely capable but rarely help) and a husband that works a lot, I get stuck with dishes as much as three or four times a day! Dishes are just one of the chores on top of dusting, bathroom scrubbing, vacuuming, sweeping, watching a 7 mo. old, and yes, even yard work. I get soooo little help it’s pathetic… sometimes I get on a cleaning rampage that involves a lot of bitching while I’m scrubbing their piss off of the toilet or doing their dishes for the 50th time that week. Then they all look at me like I’m some raving psycho bitch that’s totally overreacting. It is a very frustrating feeling when they all look at me like I’m such a bitch for pointing out their mess or if I make them help clean. I’m not a bitch! I’m just completely overwhelmed at being a slave to four other people in the home that do nothing.

    Jul 14, 2007 at 10:22 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #55.1   Brigitte

      so why don’t you do something about it?
      MAKE them change their behaviour!
      you’re the parent – you’re supposed to be the boss – act like one….or people will just continue to take advantage of you!

      Jul 29, 2008 at 2:00 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #55.2   Canthz_B bang

      Do what? This post is over a year old! :roll:

      Jul 29, 2008 at 2:23 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #56   Patricia...Patches...tusia

    OMG i love this note! i swear it just made my…well it is 1:45 (somewat)am….I do so adore the author! it is extremely hilarious! i love u…whoever made the note!

    Jul 15, 2007 at 10:44 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #57   rajesh

    that is passively aggressive note..

    Jul 16, 2007 at 4:04 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #58   messy b'stard

    I hope the remaining housemates kicked the message writer out! Do you want a fucking medal for cleaning up?

    Jul 16, 2007 at 8:36 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #59   Phil

    What an ass. Why write three pages of bullshit? Just talk to people, already!

    Jul 16, 2007 at 10:16 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #60   Shii

    Phil, you realize you are on a website called passiveaggressivenotes.com?

    Jul 16, 2007 at 10:58 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #61   Cellie

    OH my god…these girls are right–i would KILL to have a few minutes with this guy!
    His brilliance and incredible-ness is overwhelming to me–all i can say is, “Let me do YOUR dishes!” (ifyouknowwhatimean, indeed!)

    Jul 16, 2007 at 7:16 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #62   Betterbug

    What have you guys done with the meaning of “passively aggressive”? Nothing to do at all with passive aggression, unless I don’t have a clue what that is. Sarcasm I say. Brush up your idiom folks.

    Jul 17, 2007 at 4:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #63   sugarbat

    Agargara: No; actually what you call “pretentious wordiness” I like to call “articulation” and “savvy command of vocabulary.” Which not only makes him definitely “sound smart,” it also makes me think he probably actually *is* smart. The cherry on that is his dry sense of humor. If a cherry can be dry. As you can see, I’m a genius.

    Anyway, you’re weird.

    Jul 17, 2007 at 7:25 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #64   sweavo

    What betterbug said. This is comic-aggressive, sarcastic-aggressive, but it’s certainly not passive.

    Passive aggressive: “Dear Roomies, Please note we are out of hand cream as I used it all up due to severe dry skin after spending 5 hours washing up yesterday.”

    Regular aggressive: “I will kill you in your sleep oxox”

    Jul 19, 2007 at 3:14 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #65   brittany

    i want his phone #.

    Jul 28, 2007 at 1:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #66   Ryan

    That was a lot of talking on paper. I’m sure he will retire to his room, resume puffing away that fat joint he rolled, and write some more in his journal about how clean he made the world.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 7:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #67   Dr. Nona

    I think this one is my all time favorite on here!

    Aug 8, 2007 at 7:38 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #68   strongbadia7

    Has it been established if this guy has a girlfriend yet? I have a BIG crush on him just from reading this bit of passive-aggressiveness.

    Dec 1, 2007 at 8:01 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #68.1   Jess

      Yeah, I’m Eric’s wife. We were not living together when he wrote this, but the sad thing is I still make him do all the dishes. I think that there were other notes, but we haven’t found them yet.

      Jan 5, 2008 at 8:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #69   Sarah

    I think i need to marry this guy. Really if i had the guts this note would be posted over my sink. only i dont think i would be able to do it so pleasently

    Feb 21, 2008 at 1:54 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #70   Britt

    “Have some day-olds you fat fucks.”

    That’s still my favorite line from Blair St.

    Feb 25, 2008 at 12:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #71   bobby

    I need you to explain this to me. I’m going to go back and re-read this. But seriously. So. He left piles of dishes in the sink but was mad that other people also left their smaller dishes in the sink? Or… he cleaned up EVERYONE’s dishes and was being sarcastic about gourmet dinners, indicating he doesn’t actually dirty dishes? Or… They were like, “Dude, clean your dishes” and he was like, “They’re not all my dishes.” I’m going to go back and re-read this.

    Jul 11, 2008 at 2:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #71.1   uhmyahumhum

      You know sarcasm? It’s everywhere in this note.

      Jul 15, 2008 at 11:16 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #72   Jessa

    I had a roommate once who used every dish in the house & didn’t wash them. I came home one day to find all of the dishes gone. He wouldn’t tell me what he did with them but I’m pretty sure he BURIED them in the backyard.

    Sep 3, 2008 at 7:55 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #73   neontink bang

    Hands down the best note ever. I’d like to “wash his dishes” also. As silly as I feel I sound, this guy sounds amazing.

    Sep 30, 2008 at 2:59 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #74   Sadistically-peaceful bang

    who is this guy, and will he marry me?

    Nov 5, 2008 at 2:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #75   unustitle

    Did you see Simons arrive on Brtiatn got capacity when Susan Boyle stareted to peep? That was a impacter for every one! I v seen it hundred times already! lol

    Apr 22, 2009 at 7:13 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #76   AngelDolll

    If I were you, I’d better change myself. Males likes that silicon dolls that they search at pornosites and striptease. So I’d try to enlarge my bosom and my lips. If you try to find a good clinic in your hood, you can make a newer, sexiest Ann, so desired for Tom
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    Me and my guy use it.
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    Apr 22, 2009 at 11:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #77   Brieferelia

    With this swine flu crap we cannot go to Mexico! We got tickets and caboodle that sucks ass!!!

    Apr 29, 2009 at 9:57 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #78   Dieriurse

    Are you compeling for the summer vacation? Sun should be hot as not at any time in the future!!:) anticipation my ac desire pay up on me! Any plans?

    May 2, 2009 at 12:23 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #79   Bleallsweesia

    I infatuation my bacon championing breakfast! And I m not gonna restrain eating it! Flu is airborn virus if you cook nutriment it dies!

    May 2, 2009 at 6:16 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #80   Canthz_B bang

    Flu viruses are born in the air? 8-O

    WE’RE DOOMED!!!!!

    May 2, 2009 at 10:35 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #81   freltyPreorce

    I ve met a guy yerstaday on a partisans!? He gave me this element or perhaps I ve misspeled it? Is Joe here?

    May 2, 2009 at 11:55 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #82   Glosselineelf

    I infatuation my bacon for breakfast! And I m not gonna cut off eating it! Flu is airborn virus if you cook nutriment it dies!

    May 3, 2009 at 10:07 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #83   DuesCoupe

    What’s up everybody Jess in da house. I just buck from my Las Vegas trip, that was awesome I love Vegas. My boyfriend known’s I like to cook and staff and he take me to some fancy restaurant. I can’t believe my eyes they [url=http://fxfood.blogspot.com]cook[/url] in front of us, so awesome and professional. So I had I great trip, relax and relief from problems.

    May 9, 2009 at 4:18 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #84   mugprogma

    Are you kidding me!!??? Swine FLU??? In sommer in heat? Is it balance out possible? I am from Cali and I upset! stand sturdy!

    May 9, 2009 at 10:56 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #85   uttettyPhossy

    Least nice web contain here! My baby actualy sent me a affiliation! Movables fortunes!

    May 9, 2009 at 6:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #86   TuhTunnymaync

    The story roughly adventure…broken heart…..you discern Like Stewi in One’s nearest Guy

    May 9, 2009 at 8:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #87   scassydracy

    How is that novel prosperous on? You be aware ..the one you ve been righting as regards three years? NO? lol Nice web!

    May 10, 2009 at 7:23 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #88   VahShaply

    Are you kidding me!!??? Swine FLU??? In sommer in heat? Is it equal possible? I am from Cali and I ill at ease! Arrest nourishing!

    May 10, 2009 at 12:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #89   immilmusazy

    Are you kidding me!!??? Swine FLU??? In sommer in heat? Is it even possible? I am from Cali and I ill at ease! Freeze in good health!

    May 10, 2009 at 2:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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