vida says her friend in baltimore received this note from “his pathologically lying roommate.”
it’s a little hard to read, but the (genius) last line says, “if not possible we’re moving and you can stay.”
so: team joe? team asa? or too tough to call?
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46 responses so far ↓
#1 sam
if it’s yellow, it’s mellow, if it’s brown flush it down!
ASA… flush your poo!
Jun 22, 2007 at 1:42 pm rating: 0
#2 meg
team joe!
Jun 22, 2007 at 2:13 pm rating: 0
#3 garota.da.capa
Gross ! I´m on the writers side, I too have lived with someone who didn´t flush the toilet (and let the bathroom stinking like pot) and that was awful! I hated seeing that !!
Jun 22, 2007 at 2:15 pm rating: 0
#4 Johnny [Squared]
Team Joe all the way. Obviously Joe knows he’s not the one leaving shit in the toilet, so his side is more believable. And the knocking on doors at inappropriate hours is unacceptable. What if he’s masturbating?
Jun 22, 2007 at 2:31 pm rating: 0
#5 BoggyWoggy
Team Joe. People who leave poo-poo in the toilet deserve passive-aggressive notes. There are some times that, as we all know, P-A is the way to be!
Jun 22, 2007 at 3:42 pm rating: 0
#6 DiscoN
No, the best part is ending it with, “Thanks, Joe.” Even when you’re complaining about your roommate leaving his shit in the toilet, or winding it up with “it’s either you or us”, there’s no reason not to be polite….
Jun 22, 2007 at 3:50 pm rating: 0
#7 Elle
Asa knows if his poo doesn’t go down. He totally knows. If you clog, you know where the plunger is, no shame in plunging your poo. The shame is in leaving it, so Team Joe!
Jun 22, 2007 at 4:04 pm rating: 0
#8 summerface
Team Joe.
People who are named Asa automatically suck.
Jun 22, 2007 at 4:12 pm rating: 0
#9 Bbear
Joe writes like a girl. Is Joe a girl?
Jun 22, 2007 at 4:42 pm rating: 0
#10 Meredith
Team Joe!
Jun 22, 2007 at 4:47 pm rating: 0
#11 misskarenjean
The one who doesn’t flush the toilet is always the loser. Go Team Joe!
Jun 22, 2007 at 4:50 pm rating: 0
#12 eh
team joe!
spl check, buddy.
Jun 22, 2007 at 5:08 pm rating: 0
#13 Julie
It seems that the majority of these arguments stem from either the kitchen or bathroom. Food or poop.
Team Joe, whaddaya know.
Jun 22, 2007 at 5:08 pm rating: 0
#14 Barbell
If the roommate is a pathological liar and the recipient of said note does not leave shits in the toilet, I recommend starting to leave shits in the toilet. Might as well give him what he’s lying about.
Jun 22, 2007 at 5:19 pm rating: 0
#15 jyoseph
We’re moving and you can stay? OUCH!
Team joe for sure, hands down.
Jun 22, 2007 at 6:38 pm rating: 0
#16 Corey
I hate how the recipients of these notes all claim that the author of the note is a “pathological liar” or just a regular type of liar. They can’t ALL be liars, people! Clearly you are just trying to save face. In this case, Vida should tell her friend to learn how to flush/plunge/whatever with his poop. Nobody wants to see that…ever! And people who don’t know how to flush after using the toilet should be lined up and shot. There is NO EXCUSE! Absolutely NONE!
Jun 22, 2007 at 9:58 pm rating: 0
#17 Potbelly
Not sure, but Joe has got supercrazy handwiting. Normally, writing’s vertical or either slants forward or backwards to some degree that remains pretty constant. This guy’s shit leans alternately forward and back. A forensic handwriting analyst would definitely label this guy dangerous and unbalanced.
Jun 22, 2007 at 11:41 pm rating: 0
#18 MB
I’m not saying that my handwriting is any good, it’s not, but I did spend the first half of this note wondering why someone would put a shirt into the toilet.
Jun 23, 2007 at 1:17 am rating: 0
#19 Sharona
This would make a great short story. They do away with Asa, only to find that mysterious shit still appears in the toilet. Joe and Taj eye each other warily…
Jun 23, 2007 at 7:06 am rating: +1
#20 Ryan
I’m with Joe on this one and i agree with one of the comments above; knocking at innapropriate times often results in interrupted masterbation and we can all agree thats very very uncool.
Jun 23, 2007 at 4:20 pm rating: 0
#21 Shannon
I just say grow some balls and tell the guy to his face you want him to move out. What a puss.
Jun 23, 2007 at 8:12 pm rating: 0
#22 Lovecarrots
We don’t have enough information for a proper judgement here!
Joe is blaming Asa for leaving the poo but who is Taj? I reckon it’s a Three’s a crowd scenario. Taj has been leaving the pooh but when asked by Joe blamed Asa. Joe and Taj get along really well so Joe believes Taj and Asa stands wrongly accused….
Or that could be bollocks…
Team Asa for me.
Jun 24, 2007 at 2:31 am rating: 0
#23 Veronica
Team Joe. =]
Poo is yucky, no one wants to see YOURS! Learn where the plunger is kept and deal with it yourself.
The only time not fulshing is REMOTELY understandable is when you use the toilet before taking a shower (and don’t flush to keep from messing up the shower temp.), and then forget when you get out of the shower…but even then, really, just REMEMBER, it’s not that hard, I promise.
Jun 24, 2007 at 9:26 am rating: 0
#24 Asakichi
My name is Asa.
Man, I don’t want to be associated with this guy!
Jun 24, 2007 at 11:03 am rating: 0
#25 mel
You forgot “spelling and grammar police” in the tags.
Jun 24, 2007 at 11:32 am rating: 0
#26 Lisa
TEAM PLUNG!
Jun 25, 2007 at 10:17 am rating: 0
#27 Jessi
For Veronica - total agreement. And the trick is to leave the toilet lid UP in ’said situation’ and then when you step out of the shower…well, you get the point. A little visual reminder to flush. hehehe
Jun 25, 2007 at 10:40 am rating: 0
#28 john
That note doesn’t require spelling police, it requires a spelling ambulance trip to the spelling emergency room.
Jun 25, 2007 at 10:45 am rating: 0
#29 Vida
Hi, I submitted this note, and would like to vouch for team ASA (which are intials, guys, not a name. Jeez.)
When ASA confronted Joe on this note, Joe admitted that he didn’t know who clogged the toilet (once), and he just wanted to move out of the house because it was too crowded. Too crowded meaning his girlfriend who he moved into his room without asking anyone.
Inappropriate hours actually mean anytime because Joe works part-time and naps in his room all day. However, he likes to tell people he is the manager of blockbuster for “extra cash” in addition to being a chef at a four star restaurant. Somehow he got his masters without ever graduating high school. He also meets “tons of hot married women” at blockbuster that he sleeps with. I don’t know when, since his girlfriend lives with him.
For more fascinating insight into Joe, check out his eyesore of a myspace page:
http://myspace.com/kingbmore
Jun 25, 2007 at 12:19 pm rating: 0
#30 Vida
P.S. The problem with ASA that they graciously let go, was ASA yelling at them for leaving garbage on the floor of the kitchen when the garbage can was full.
They put chicken on the floor of the kitchen because they couldn’t be bothered to take the garbage outside.
Jun 25, 2007 at 12:22 pm rating: 0
#31 Nostalgia
A crappy toilet will play hide and seek with the payload. It’s gone when you flush, but it will make a reappearance just prior to your roommate’s discovery of it.
Who used the can last? It’s probably satisfying to blame ASA, but I wouldn’t rule out Taj. I’d drag him in there to see if he recognized it as his own. C’mon, you’d know if it were yours.
Jun 25, 2007 at 4:22 pm rating: 0
#32 Potbelly
Vida…your description of Joe jibes with the impression I got of him based on his handwriting (#17)
I knew he was a schizo. His epilepsy inducing Myspace near-to crashed my damn computer.
Jun 25, 2007 at 6:18 pm rating: 0
#33 Garr
Does Joe speak English or is he an ESL student? This is the worst note I think I’ve ever seen. Though I agree with Joe, I think he should be shot.
Team SHOOT Joe!
Jun 27, 2007 at 4:06 am rating: 0
#34 Kristen
I love how it looks as if he took all the pics on his Myspace page himself.
Jun 27, 2007 at 10:39 am rating: 0
#35 joebec
team poop!
Jun 29, 2007 at 3:02 pm rating: 0
#36 joe's fingernails
please cut me. please stop joe from doing any more coke.
Jul 2, 2007 at 7:43 am rating: 0
#37 RaggDolly121
Ew. Gross. INSANE!!!
Jul 2, 2007 at 1:50 pm rating: 0
#38 Mariel
-agrees with RaggDolly-
Jul 2, 2007 at 2:01 pm rating: 0
#39 Doug
Team ASA.
However… Joe’s Myspace page mentions that he manages a Rite Aid store, not Blockbuster. Which is it - or both? Both are heavily populated with “tons of hot married women”. All that activity may explain the frequent naps.
Jul 3, 2007 at 1:31 pm rating: 0
#40 Vida
There was a shooting at Blockbuster (lols, Baltimore) so he quit and started working at Rite Aid. He has claimed to manage both. You know, for extra cash.
Jul 8, 2007 at 9:28 am rating: 0
#41 Summer
This is AWESOME, that guy is crazy.
Jul 11, 2007 at 12:59 pm rating: 0
#42 Jill
I wonder if his girlfriend knows that his Myspace claims he’s single.
I’m torn now. At first I was Team Joe all the way, but after seeing that retina-burning nightmare with “douchebag” written all over it, as well as the testimony from the note submitter, I don’t really want to be siding with him.
I say that A.S.A. learns to plunge the crapper, and Joe moves out. Because he’s lame.
Jul 18, 2007 at 9:30 pm rating: 0
#43 WalterBean
I’m going to go with Team ASA because I knew a guy named Asa in elementary and middle school and I’m from Maryland (and yes I realize his name isn’t actually Asa but it gave me nice memories of said person.)
Plus, I had a roommate in college that used to clog the shower with her 3 foot long RED hair then blamed me for the shower over flowing. My hair was short and brown. I knew whose hair it really was.
Jul 24, 2007 at 3:41 pm rating: 0
#44 Dr. Nona
I had a roommate who would frequently clog the toilet and leave it. So gross. Many times I came home from class needing to pee badly, and had to hold it while I plunged our one and only toity.
I never had the chutzpah to confront her though. Too embarrassing.
Aug 8, 2007 at 8:14 pm rating: 0
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