What Michael Moore didn’t show you in Sicko

July 11th, 2007 · 30 comments

Annette in the U.K. calls this one “How to make toast in the NHS.”

MAKING TOAST!!!! While bread is only provided for the patients, nobody minds our hard working staff making themselves some toast However due to recent problems to following rules apply to EVERYBODY

FILED UNDER: bread · CAPS LOCK · danger · dishes · excessive underlining · exclamation-point happy!!!! · hospitals & doctors · office · U.K.


30 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Heather

    “Clear your mess up after you”…I sense a new “You all everybody.”

    That sound you heard was proper syntax being pummeled to death.

    Jul 11, 2007 at 6:03 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #2   Brian R

    This can’t be the NHS.

    Surely you need to fill in a form to make toast in the NHS.

    Jul 11, 2007 at 7:18 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   Katherine

    the sentence in in the last bullet needs to be reworded. big time.

    Jul 11, 2007 at 8:00 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   Erin

    “Leave the patients a bit of bread”

    The compassion overfloweth.

    Jul 11, 2007 at 8:38 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   ALA

    I really thought the British were better educated than Americans…perhaps I was mistaken.

    Does NHS provide *real* butter? No wonder it’s on the brink of financial ruin! ;o)

    Jul 11, 2007 at 9:09 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   Strideo

    all your toast are belong to us

    Jul 11, 2007 at 10:11 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   Me

      LMAO

      Dec 11, 2007 at 10:34 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   Writer, Rejected

    The domestics are not here to wash dishes. They are here to wait on patients, who are starving for bread.

    Jul 11, 2007 at 10:57 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   HotMom

    The butterdish comment needs to be on it’s own paper all together or just forgotten. How much butter do they go through that warrants a note to take off the paper before putting it in the dish?
    7:30 am
    unwrap butter
    place
    use
    unwrap butter
    place
    use
    unwrap butter
    place
    use
    place
    use
    7:40 am
    Dammit! Who didn’t unwrap the paper?
    I can go quite a long time before replacing the butter because I use a COVER on the butterdish! If you don’t have a cover leave it wrapped. duh
    Team Toast

    Jul 11, 2007 at 11:23 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Writer, Rejected

    I’m hungry.

    Jul 11, 2007 at 12:17 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   jimmyjimmyjimmyjimmykalamahoo! kalamahee! kalamabringachairplease!

    i want toast

    Jul 11, 2007 at 12:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   CanuckEh!

    Writer, Rejected…you kill me!!!! hahahaha

    Jul 11, 2007 at 1:28 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   Brianne

    MMmm…toast.

    Jul 11, 2007 at 3:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   Nurse Annette

    That toast was fucking delicious!

    Jul 11, 2007 at 5:16 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Andy

    Nurse Annette: I love it. We’re so damn self-referential here in our comments. Huzzah!

    Jul 11, 2007 at 6:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Writer, Rejected

    I hope they never let any of the doctors in on this. Doctors think they know everything, and they think that they are always in charge, but I bet they know nothing of the underground, conspiratorial staff toast hoarding campaign that goes on in that place.

    Jul 11, 2007 at 7:35 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Simster

    Why do I suspect that toast is occassionally left in the toaster because the person toasting it needed to rush off and, I don’t know, look after a patient or something?

    Jul 11, 2007 at 9:52 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   Anonymous

    MAKING TOAST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    okay

    Jul 12, 2007 at 1:02 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   ethel filby

    patients? let them eat cake

    Jul 12, 2007 at 1:19 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   Collaroy

    DA: “Nurse, did you not hear the patient’s alarma go off?”
    NURSE: “I did.”
    DA: “Then why didn’t you rush to his side to save his life?”
    NURSE: “Because I wasn’t allowed to.”
    DA: “You weren’t allowed to? Why is that? After all, you are working in a hospital!”
    NURSE: “Well, I was in the kitchen making toast and there’s a sign that says that while making toast you are never allowed to walk away.”
    JUDGE: “Nurse, you are found not guilty of failure to render assistance. However, you will be charged with theft of food for eating your patient’s bread. Now, will the person who put up that sign come forward so that we can charge him or her of killing that patient?”

    Jul 12, 2007 at 2:44 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Dave

    Buwahaha, the domestics make toast for me all the time! They just love me though.

    Jul 12, 2007 at 3:26 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Simster

    @ collaroy – just as I imagined it :)

    Jul 12, 2007 at 3:51 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   Mel

    “Canna have a bit ‘o bread, Guvner?”

    Jul 12, 2007 at 9:19 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   JoeDrinker

    Angry people who can’t string together a coherent sentence make me smile.

    Jul 12, 2007 at 7:45 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   ema

    it saddens me to think of those poor patients being neglected while the workers make themselves toast :( but maybe they will bring the patients toast? unless they aren’t allowed to have toast, but must instead have plain bread. ;)

    Aug 6, 2007 at 1:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Lynne

    I’m on team kitchen. I know exactly where this note was from! It has to be a day surgery unit, the patients can’t leave until they can keep down some food, ie. toast. For that reason the kitchen staff stock their kitchenette with bread as well as juice for the PATIENTS! Yet for some reason I have to run bread up every day even when they have no surgeries scheduled. So someone does mind “our hard working staff” making themselves toast, they can haul their ass down to the cafeteria and pay for it just like everyone else! Guess who’s budget all this bread comes out of? Not theirs. Sorry. Rant over.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 11:55 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   Callie

    Was this found in Chesterfield Royal? I remember seeing a note soooo similar to this when I worked on day surg there…

    Jun 15, 2008 at 5:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   CakeOrDeath

    This is so funny yet typical. NHS staff live on toast, we love toast, you can’t smell toast and NOT want some – all fresh and crispy outer, fluffy inner, buttery and hot….mmmmm…..tooooooaaassstt…

    Not right that they freeload though, the rest of us in non-heated-breadproducts hospital departments have to fight to the canteen and if it’s outside of regulation Toast Time, sadly will be denied.

    That’s why lots of depts have their own toasters, to the eternal chagrin of the fire officers, as said items are the main cause of setting off fire alarms and it’s a tad embarassing for that person when standard response of 2 or 3 fire engines roar up to the door. Heh. On the plus side, they can munch hot toast and watch the hunky firemen…it’s tough in the Health Service sometimes but we cope :)

    Nov 28, 2008 at 1:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   hungry nurse

    Hey, the least the NHS can do for the hungry staff is let them eat a little toast….i’m sure the kitchen can spare a loaf or two of bread a day. After all, when I’m on that 12 hour shift and haven’t had time to pee, let alone run down to buy some food, I think my patients might WANT me to eat a bit so that I don’t pass out. Enough of that…..doesn’t this make anyone else think of that crazy song called…TOAST!!! Yeah TOAST!! ?

    Jun 24, 2009 at 9:51 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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