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Water, water everywhere

August 7th, 2007 · 40 comments

“Informing the building landlord about a sticky tap would probably have been a more sensible move than guilt-tripping the female staff into feeling responsible for global water shortages,” notes Rayya in Canterbury, Kent.

But it doesn’t end there. Says Rayya, “Not only are we responsible for global water shortages , but we’re breaking people’s limbs!”

Over the last week two ladies have slipped over water left on the floor between the toilet cubicles and the basins. One of them had to be taken to a hospital with a suspected broken ankle and wrist. If you spill any water it makes the floor very slippery and dangerous. PLEASE at the very least be kind enough to put the danger sign over the spillage to warn your colleagues. But preferably mop it up, there are blue paper towels in most of the kitchen areas. Many thanks

FILED UNDER: bathroom · CAPS LOCK · danger · guilt trip · office · The Earth · U.K. · water

40 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Kai

    Please be mindful of oxygen consumption. This includes deep breathing, yawning, and sighs. There is a lack of clean air due to pollution from your car as you drove the road-rage inducing commute to your underpaid job. Please do not help yourself to a second serving, as there are starving children in Africa, as well as starving employees and unborn children from having their lunches pilfered. Remember, if there is a catastrophe across the world, or a frown on a hungry person’s face, you caused it.

    Have a nice day.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 7:00 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

  • #2   Justin

    I love the bitching within the bitching.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 7:07 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #3   Kai

    As an addendum, how does one slip on water on the floor? Maybe because I’ve never worn heels (indeed that would be unusual for a man) I’ve never found the wet ground particularly slippery. Water plus soap on a smooth surface is indeed slippery, as well as frozen water, and water on top of a thick layer of grease that coats the floor of a McDonald’s in the back. Even these will not cause me to tumble as I speedwalk across them with my arms laden. Someone please enlighten me as how mere water is so slippery.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 7:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #4   Andy

    Did they slip when trying to climb on the toilet? Didn’t they read that other sign? Oh yeah, different country. :)

    You know, I bet if you put the warning sign down, someone would trip on the sign, getting a suspected broken ankle and wrist.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 7:21 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #5   BoggyWoggy

    Yeah, like it’s “water” on the floor between 2 toilet cubicles! Har, har, har!

    Aug 7, 2007 at 7:31 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #6   Simster

    LOL @ Kai. Love it.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 7:50 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #7   Writer, Rejected

    Something about both of these signs turns my stomach. But I do love “The Canterbury Tales,” so maybe I’m just being a bitch, and I should put a danger sign over my head or at least mop myself up with blue paper towels.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 8:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #8   sharkie

    hehe “slipped over”

    Aug 7, 2007 at 8:38 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #9   E

    I’ve slipped on spilled water on tile before… it is very easy to do if you are wearing dress shoes with leather soles (doesn’t have to be heels). That is assuming this is a work bathroom, and not a college dorm or something. In that case, if they are in bare feet, it is definitely easy to slip. I did the same thing in my own bathroom (I didn’t realize a seal on the sliding door had broken, water leaked on the floor. ) I luckily caught myself, so only a sore muscle and not a broken bone.

    First note? Team call the landlord. Second note – team broken bones. Mop up your damn water.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 9:35 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #10   G-Unit

    I blame Richard G. Sells.

    Aug 7, 2007 at 10:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #11   Coffeegirl

    I have managed to slip on spilled water wearing sneakers and thus tearing a ligament – I’m team broken bones all the way.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 1:34 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #12   Fraulein N

    But look! They’re giving you options on how to solve this problem. That’s swell of them. If only I understood how crafting a water-proof danger sign on the fly is somehow LESS trouble than, you know, cleaning up the damn water you spilled.

    Also, is it just me, or is there something awkward about implying that running the hot tap “requires an enormous amount of effort”?

    Aug 8, 2007 at 5:58 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #13   Goldie

    #9, I think both signs were in the same bathroom. How the heck would water get on the bathroom floor unless there are massive plumbing problems? They should have the taps fixed and stop guilt-tripping the poor women. Sheesh.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 6:00 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #14   Katzendogz

    I’m with E on this one.

    Fraulein, I think what the note meant was that the hot water tap can only be turned completely off if you use a lot of effort to turn the handle, otherwise it will drip. Perhaps people were using the normal effort to turn it off, and not making a greater effort when that didn’t do the trick.

    I’ve thought about leaving a passive aggressive note on our paper towel dispenser, which is broken most of the time and only gets temporary fixes by maintenance, but I’ve decided to just inwardly burn with fury as I wipe my wet hands on my work clothes.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 6:25 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #15   bethany

    this smacks of bureaucrats who enjoy telling others what to do instead of solving the problem directly (call the landlord).

    Aug 8, 2007 at 6:33 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #16   T-Bone

    Frau N:

    I thought that too!


    Aug 8, 2007 at 6:44 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #17   super_fan#99

    Not just thanks. MANY thanks.

    E, when I first read your post and came to the part about the seal behind the door I got excited, thinking maybe you actually had seals, you know, the animals in your bathroom. How cool would that be?

    Aug 8, 2007 at 6:57 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #18   the sos

    Fraulein, I don’t think they intended one to actually craft a sign. If you read closely, it says please put out “the” danger sign, indicating to me that there is a caution sign (with a nondescript person slipping and falling) nearby to warn others of the leak. Kind of like the signs placed out when one mops. Or like the sign you might see when one mops up a leak or spill. Oh, now we’re back to square one. Next sign: “If you spill something and decide to mop it up instead of simply placing the danger sign out, PLEASE place the danger sign out.”

    Aug 8, 2007 at 6:57 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #19   Fraulein N

    Lordy. Why don’t we just LEAVE the danger sign out? Until someone trips over it and they have to come up with a new warning, that is.

    If they do in fact mean THE danger sign, perhaps they should … I don’t know … fix the faucet? Likewise, if it’s requiring some kind of Herculean effort to turn off the hot tap, maybe they could go in there with a wrench or something. Instead of posting Danger notices, even.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 7:22 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #20   Maxime

    I thought they meant that heating the leaky hot water is what required enormous effort? As in, the energy bill grows? Poor sentence structure leads us to confusion!

    Aug 8, 2007 at 7:31 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #21   GhostWriter

    What were those ladies doing anyway?

    Everybody knows that the area between the toilet cubicles and the basins is the no-man’s-land of the bathroom. I’m surprised (and relieved) to hear that they got out of there with only a suspected broken ankle and wrist. I know a guy who lost a foot in there. Stupid ladies.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 8:09 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #22   Mishee

    “as there are starving children in Africa, as well as starving employees and unborn children from having their lunches pilfered.” – Kai you crack me up!!

    And although I have no comment regarding these notes (which are funny in their own right) I will say that you said walking in heels in unusual for a man – you haven’t been to San Francisco have you?? :)

    Aug 8, 2007 at 8:15 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #23   Sazbot

    Water shortage in England? May I direct you to Tewkesbury (and the rest of Gloucestershire) and Oxfordshire.

    Having said that, leaving taps running is highly silly.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 8:59 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #24   will

    The suspected broken ankle and wrist were both later cleared of all charges.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 9:17 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #25   Zsa

    Team leave “the” Danger sign out at all times.

    GhostWriter~ it is a well-documented fact in our building that the Mens is a MUCH more dangerous place than the Ladies.
    We ladies wouldnt expect water hazards and enormous effort needed to turn off faucets. Ours is normally a haven of sweet-smelling lotions and hovering butts.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 10:00 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #26   ijRoberts

    Beware the “hovering butts”, they can leave their own kind of spillage.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 10:25 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #27   cre8tivewmn

    Exactly, IJ! Leading to my own (in thought only) PA note: “If you won’t sit down, at least clean up!”

    Aug 8, 2007 at 10:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #28   DUH

    Don’t they have lawyers in the UK? Here in the US everyone is so litigious that a company would never dare to leave the mopping up to the employees. Common US parlance in this case would be “that’s a lawsuit waiting to happen!”

    Aug 8, 2007 at 10:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #29   mere

    kai- you’re funny!
    fraulein- i agree, why not fix the problem? but then, there would be no ‘danger’ signs to post.
    and then what would i do when i’m bored at work? i wouldn’t be able to make fun of the signs. i would have to *gasp* WORK!

    Aug 8, 2007 at 11:27 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #30   Talea

    I love this person. I seem to be in the majority, but I think she raises a great point. We’re running out of water, we need that to survive. Um, dudes, how hard is it to turn off a friggin’ tap?

    Aug 8, 2007 at 11:29 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #31   Talea

    I love this person. I seem to be in the minority, but I think she raises a great point. We’re running out of water, we need that to survive. Um, dudes, how hard is it to turn off a friggin’ tap?

    Aug 8, 2007 at 11:29 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #32   White Rabbit

    I particularly like the statement that “currently” there’s a water shortage, as if it’s a temporary thing, but then the sentence turns around and refers to it as “chronic”! You should always have someone else check these things over.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 11:34 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #33   LC.

    White Rabbit…you don’t know. Maybe it went from a “current” shortage to “OMG IT’S CHRONIC!” in the seconds it took to write those few lines. See, we NEED these signs to keep us informed of our impact on the environment on a second to second basis!

    The next one will say…”Are you happy now?!!? We have a water holocaust on our hands!”

    That said…boo signs.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 12:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #34   ijRoberts

    Talea: “Um, dudes, how hard is it to turn off a friggin’ tap?”

    Evidently it takes an “enormous amount of effort”…

    Aug 8, 2007 at 1:46 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #35   BoggyWoggy

    I still don’t believe it’s water on the floor. I think it’s pee-pee…I’ve heard there are actually folks out there who pee on the floor on purpose, then hope that someone slips, falls, and gets injured in their pee!

    Aug 8, 2007 at 2:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #36   anglophile

    I like the exact description of the blue paper towels, but I’m a little troubled by the fact that they can only be found in “most” of the kitchen areas. So what happens if you spill some water on the floor in the bathroom? You have to go to the kitchen area to get the floor-cleaning blue paper towels? What if you go to one of the kitchen areas that are devoid of the blue paper towels? Then it’s a big hunt to find one of the properly-stocked kitchen areas. In the meantime, someone might slip on the water you left on the floor! It’s a big responsibility. Maybe I would just skip washing my hands to make absolutely sure I wasn’t leaving water on the floor. Then I’d go shake the note-writer’s hand, to thank her for preventing more suspected broken bones.

    Aug 8, 2007 at 4:09 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #37   David

    The writer of the note is right. Try being curious to others and the planet… It’s not THAT hard to turn off the water after you are finished. If you spill water, clean it. I don’t understand how it gets to the point where notes like this have to be written. Who doesn’t turn off the tap? Damn.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 3:55 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #38   JohnDiddler

    The second note is not unreasonable.

    Aug 14, 2007 at 7:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #39   Amanda

    May the Passive Aggressive GODS smile on you Kai…for that made my fucking day!

    May 31, 2009 at 11:04 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #40   Help yourself |

    [...] related: Water, water everywhere [...]

    Aug 31, 2011 at 9:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up


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