Did you ever consider the possibility that…oh, never mind.

August 9th, 2007 · 71 comments

did you consider the possibility that...oh, never mind.

FILED UNDER: California · e-mail · food · mold · office · questionable logic · San Francisco · sarcasm

71 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Sean Newton

    Now that one’s priceless. The only sad thing, is that the guy may not actually read that email if he’s out sick for a few days from eating the sandwich. :)

    Aug 9, 2007 at 7:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #2   deanna

    Is this person sure someone ate it. Personally, I would have thrown the sandwich away and then left a PA note saying “although you may think mold is edible…”. Perhaps, someone in this world is neat without being passive aggressive – shocking, for sure, but it may happen!

    Aug 9, 2007 at 7:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #3   jules

    I thought the same thing, deanna. Maybe someone read the postings on the previous note,”containing as much or as many as is possible or normal”, got sick of the moldy food, and threw it away.

    This email makes it kind of sound like the writer still wanted the moldy old sandwich, and is mad someone took it!

    Aug 9, 2007 at 7:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #4   bethany

    I’m with Deanna too. who eats food out of communal fridge without thorougly examining it first? who knows how long that stuff has been there? If the emailer was setting up a regular food stealer, then well done.

    Aug 9, 2007 at 7:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #5   Ella

    Maybe the sandwich wasn’t actually molding and the note sender is just trying to freak someone out.
    In that case, Team Sandwich Eater. Pepper jack cheese is delish.

    Aug 9, 2007 at 7:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #6   Super_Fan#99

    that sandwich was fucking delicious.

    Aug 9, 2007 at 7:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #7   Dr. Nona

    Okay, if the sandwich was moldy anyway, why would the owner be pissed if someone else ate it?

    Aug 9, 2007 at 7:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #8   E

    LOL.. not sure if I would count this as passive aggressive… but funny as hell!

    I recall an incident with a neighborhood girl when I was young (2nd or 3rd grade). She had “sticky fingers” She came out of my bathroom, with fairly shiny lips. I went into the bathroom myself, and happened to notice that my lip gloss was gone (Tinkerbell anyone?) Now, I didn’t normally mind sharing stuff with her or the other kids, but even then I knew that lip gloss was a no no – I had cold sores a lot and could infect others. So I asked her if she “borrowed” my lip gloss and she VEHEMENTLY denied it (now that I think about it, she was a really bad actress). I knew it was her, so I just said “oh good, ’cause anyone who used it would get a lot of cold sores” and she definitely knew what they were – she had teased me about them before!!! I caught her scrubbing her lips later on… heh, heh, heh.

    Aug 9, 2007 at 8:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #9   Tara

    Was the writer of the letter conducting a science experiment, a la Morgan Spurlock of “Supersize Me”? I hope so, because otherwise their attempt at sarcasm was just sad.

    It strikes me as odd that they put their sandwich in the fridge in the first place.

    Aug 9, 2007 at 8:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #10   Cat Skyfire

    I’m betting that the sandwich was fine, but that the writer wanted the sandwich thief to think it had been going bad.

    Aug 9, 2007 at 8:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #11   Andy

    Super_Fan#99, you beat me to it. :)

    Aug 9, 2007 at 10:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #12   Super_Fan#99

    It still amazes me when I have food stolen from the community fridge. I’m no germ freak but just because I like to wash my hands before I make a sandwich doesn’t mean everyone does. It is just wrong on so many levels.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 1:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #13   Susan

    I’m with Super_Fan#99. And it’s not just about washing hands when preparing food. If there is someone’s leftover dinner in the community fridge, who’s to say they (or one of their family members) didn’t sneeze or cough on the plate the night before? YUCK!

    My personal rule: Don’t touch anything in the work fridge you didn’t bring!!

    Aug 10, 2007 at 5:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #14   adam

    Sounds like this guy pulled a Homer, and didn’t care about a moldy sandwich…

    Aug 10, 2007 at 5:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #15   Heather

    “Hope you enjoyed!”

    The sandwich? Or the indigestion and vomiting?

    Aug 10, 2007 at 6:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #16   Eliz

    I’m sure the sandwich was fine and the sender just wanted to identify the culprit by the gagging noise coming from his/her cubicle upon receipt of the e-mail.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 6:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #17   Mishee

    I’m just wondering how the note writer knew that the turkey was starting to rot and the pepperjack had mold spores unless they themself had already checked the sandwich sometime in the recent past… but if they saw it was starting to turn why the heck did they put it back into the fridge and not throw it out? I think I am with Team “Note is just to freak the eater out”. It just doesn’t make any sense any other way… but either way, Kudos for the note!

    Aug 10, 2007 at 6:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #18   Vampira

    Did you ever consider the possibility that…someone threw it away? :O

    Aug 10, 2007 at 6:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #19   Dee

    I guess if someone was chronically stealing your lunch it would make some sense to put botulism in the fridge. But even then, what a jerk.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 6:48 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #20   T-Bone

    I’m assuming that this was an interoffice email to co-workers rather than an email to fellow housemates? That’s what I love about it!

    Now all co-workers know you’re either a.) a lazy slob who can’t be bothered to throw out your moldy food which has been rotting in the communal office fridge, or b.) an angry little person who feels perfectly justified in sending an accusatory email to everyone in the office!
    Either way, it doesn’t reflect very well upon the sender.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 6:48 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #21   e

    Our office is cool, no one steals food. Except I steal people’s milk for my coffee, but then I tell them, and they can steal my milk. So maybe it’s not so much stealing. The only rule is: if you finish the milk, let the person know or replace it. We’re so nice! And we’re attorneys. Can you believe it?

    Aug 10, 2007 at 6:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #22   GhostWriter

    Classic P/A Sour Grapes.
    Who would make or even attempt to keep a sandwich like that? Maybe Herman Munster.

    ..in which case, it wasn’t P/A at all, but chef’s pride.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 7:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #23   PatHMV

    I’m thinking that the writer had previous problems with the food thief, read this blog, and got some ideas for responding (remember all the disgusting tips on how to keep people from drinking your beer?).

    She obviously intentionally brought in a moldy sandwich and put it in the fridge, knowing that it would be stolen, as her previous lunches had been stolen. Then she sent the e-mail.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 7:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #24   Andy

    The note writer ripped that rotten sandwich bit from The Simpsons:

    Homer: “5 more feet and I can fit it in the fridge!”


    “Oh sandwich, how can I be mad at you?”

    Aug 10, 2007 at 7:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #25   rupert

    There is absolutely no way the owner would be upset that a known-bad sandwich went missing.

    0% possibility.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 7:39 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #26   Cindy

    Rats! I wish I’d kept the extremely p/a note I left as bait for my nosy (ex)in-laws! They snooped through everything! I came home from work one day to the question, “How long has your daughter been a satan worshipper?” My puzzled look promted the follow-up, “I saw, “The Satanic Verses” by her bed while I was vacuuming.” Then there was the “crappy” Christmas gift – a petrified turtle turd. My fil said it would be ‘real purty’ polished up.
    Yeah, just like him, you can dress him up really nicely but even shiny crap is still crap!

    Aug 10, 2007 at 7:55 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #27   Yuriko

    Cindy: LOL.. Some people value crap.. didn’t you know? Afterall, one person’s junk is another person’s treasure. Just look at eBay!

    Now as for the note and the sandwich… umm eww.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 8:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #28   PatHMV

    Rupert… where did the owner say she was upset?

    I’m telling you people, this was a well-plotted REVENGE for previous sandwich thefts. How is everybody missing that? In every single “stop stealing my food” post I’ve read, dozens of folks chime in with recommendations to plant somewhat tainted food to teach the culprit a lesson. Here we have an actual example, and nobody seems to realize it!

    Aug 10, 2007 at 8:49 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #29   Katzendogz

    Since it’s possible that the sandwich stealer will think the e-mailer is lying, it would have been more effective to say “I licked the turkey while assembling the sandwich and, by the way, I have a cold. Achoo!”

    Aug 10, 2007 at 9:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #30   will

    The writer of the note is a liar. Is the reader supposed to believe that he or she made a rancid sammich? Jesus hates liars but tolerates food thieves because people gotta eat ya know.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 9:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #31   Ary

    PAN fans: Don’t know where else to post this: saw a great bad movie last night called “Noise,” where the heroine leaves a PAN for her noisy upstairs neighbor. It solves everything. As if.

    What other instances of PANs are there in the movies?

    Aug 10, 2007 at 10:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #32   whatever

    It seems more likely that someone would have thrown it away rather than eat that disgusting thing. Maybe the writer foolishly got upset over someone cleaning out the garbage….

    Aug 10, 2007 at 11:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #33   lindsay

    did anyone ever consider the the possibility that the cheese and meat were starting to get little mold patches in the package in her fridge at home and that he/she just cut the mold off and used the good stuff left over instead of wasting it? as in the sandwich hadn’t been sitting there rotting away in the community fridge? i do that all the time. just because a little part is going bad doesn’t mean the whole thing is bad. (and no i’ve never gotten sick from that)

    Aug 10, 2007 at 11:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #34   PatHMV

    I give up.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 12:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #35   Super_Fan#99

    Are you freaking kidding me Lindsay? I throw milk away 2 days before the expiration date. Cut off the mold and eat the good part? Gross! You know, just because you can’t see the bacteria doesn’t mean it’s not there.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 12:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #36   ijRoberts

    While I am the same as SuperFan (throwing milk away before it expires… Actually, I don’t even like to drink the last 1/2 inch of it – OCD I guess) – I do believe that the writer of the note had that intention, that the turkey was going bad and this was the cheese’s last day to live, so basically they ate a sandwich that was on its last legs.

    Or, it could have been the last bit of a revenge plot. But, if that was the case, it was a bit anti-climatic.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 12:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #37   will

    Note to self: If I’m ever at Lindsay’s and she offers me something to eat, say no.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 1:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #38   joebec

    there is no way in hell that person brought in a bad sandwich! what were THEY gonna eat? bogus!

    Aug 10, 2007 at 2:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #39   j

    ok the people who are saying things like “the person couldn’t have brought a bad sandwich to work why would they want to eat that”

    THEY weren’t planning on eating it. they were planning on the person who had been stealing their sandwiches BEFORE to eat it. if their sandwiches are constantly being stolen, then they’re probably used to not eating them at lunch, and maybe they brought something else to eat.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 2:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #40   will

    But if it had been ongoing theft the note surely would have mentioned that fact.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 2:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #41   PatHMV

    j, I’ve been telling them that all day, and nobody’s listening.

    Will, why? She wasn’t writing a general P-A note telling people to stop stealing the food, she was concisely informing the thief that he had been gotten, but good.

    I mean, come on, folks, doesn’t the revenge angle seem MUCH more likely than that she actually brought a rotten sandwich to work intending to eat it herself?

    Aug 10, 2007 at 2:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #42   aliastaken

    I’ve eaten green roast beef. Put enough mayo on it and it’s just like edible.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 3:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #43   Trickster

    I’m with Pat on this one.

    And on another note, yes people have to eat, but does that justify stealing other peoples lunches? No. At most offices it is very unlikely that someone who is not employed is going to be anywhere near the fridge. Hence, people who are actually in the vicinity of the crime scene are people who are infact employed, and therefore payed to be there.

    I may be a freak, but I actually spend time and money making food to take with me to my place of work. There is no point in suffering more than I have to, so I will make sure I have a tasty lunch made from fresh groceries.

    I just can’t understand how anyone can justify stealing someone elses lunch in an office environment?
    “I get 2 cents less an hour than the other fella, so I am totally gonna get back at the CEO by stealing Pansys lunch, I am also sure that that will improve the friendly atmosphere here at the office!”

    Aug 10, 2007 at 3:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #44   Andy

    PatHMV: I think you’re right about some of the comments perhaps inspiring this incident.

    That just goes to show that we need to use our snarkiness for good and not evil, or something like that.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 3:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #45   Anna

    See, this is the kind of passive-aggressive note I like. Slightly sarcastic without being too mean, but it makes the point.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 4:01 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #46   Writer, Rejected

    What’s wrong with a little rotten meat and cheese. I’ve eaten worse. I assume that this email went out to a whole bunch of people in an office or shared living space, which is kind of cool. This P/A note writer has some style, if you ask me. “Giant mold spores.” I don’t think the writer is a liar as much as a poet.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 5:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #47   Marissa

    I’m sure I’d be bitter if I missed out on a chance to ingest mold.

    Aug 10, 2007 at 7:00 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #48   lisa

    I wonder if it occurred to the sender that if the sandwich was all gross, maybe somebody just cleaned out the fridge and threw away all the rotting stuff…

    Aug 10, 2007 at 7:59 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #49   Colleen

    Seriously? Cheese is mold — Cut it off and start again. I’d never do that to meat, though. Gross.

    Aug 11, 2007 at 1:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #50   Lori W.

    Maybe she knew the sandwich on its last legs and was going to throw it out later. Our housekeeping staff only throws out trash once a day and so if you’re going to throw something a bit nasty, you do it around the time she’s coming by.

    But I think she did plant the sandwich and was letting someone know they had been had.

    (I always loved the Lunch Bandit Thief storylines in Homicide. )

    Aug 11, 2007 at 12:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #51   Lisa R.

    A better note would have said:

    “Enjoy the sandwich! …I have hepatitis.”

    Aug 12, 2007 at 12:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #52   Lisa R.

    Or “pinworm.”

    I’m sure you all get the idea.

    Aug 12, 2007 at 12:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #53   Writer, Rejected

    It’d be fun if someone in the office wrote back and said: “Great sammy. Thanks! Next time more mold and less mayo. I prefer cheddar to pepper jack in case you are interested.”

    Aug 12, 2007 at 3:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #54   BoggyWoggy

    Here’s my analysis:
    It is P-A since the intended victim really is unknown, the note-writer is angry, and trying to inflict feelings of fear to the eater. Also, it appears to be sent via e-mail to the entire staff…
    This just proves tht P-A is NOT always a bad thing!
    Team Rotten Turkey!

    Aug 12, 2007 at 4:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #55   [email protected]

    haha, I just love the fact that people are passionately debating the events that led up to this note, with basically zero evidence! Gold!

    Aug 12, 2007 at 10:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #56   [email protected]

    Perhaps the sammich was fine and the note was a trap – intended to trick the sammich-thief into an outraged response.

    “it was VERY IRRESPONSIBLE of you to leave a moldy sammich in the work fridge, i mistakenly ate it because i forgot my sammich and im sick so i needed to eat and i thought it was maybe a sammich i brought the other day. You should put your NAME on the sammich if you dont want mistakes like this to happen, and also you should remove the food if it is off because the fridge is a *SHARED* space and we ALL need to take responsibility for keeping it clean. Will you be paying my medical bills if i get sick from eating the sammich? And what if the mould started to inhabit other peoples food?

    Also please be considerate of others when opening the fridge door, people have been keeping it open for too long which leaks all the cold air out of the fridge, thereby making for an uncomfortable environment for staff near the kitchen because of A) the cold air from the fridge lowering the room temperature and requiring the use of space heaters to maintain a comfortable environment, 2) the noise from the fridge as it runs FLAT OUT to get back to a cold temperature which is VERY distracting for staff in the area and III) PLEASE CONSIDER THE “ENVIRONMENT” when opening the fridge door as the INCREASED POWER USE may lead to global warming and there are now water shortages worldwide so please consider the environment before leaving the fridge door open.

    PS – that sammich was fucking delicious.”

    Aug 12, 2007 at 11:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #57   PatHMV

    Oooohhhh…. I’m actually scared now. That was brilliant, [email protected]! I hope I never am on the receiving end of a real P-A note from you…

    Aug 13, 2007 at 7:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #58   Jussi

    What if the person who ate the sandwich actually died of food poisoning? (I know it’s not likely, but it could happen.) Would the writer of the PA note be happy then? And what would the police think if they knew that the sammy was purposely left in the fridge to be eaten by the deceased person?

    Passive-aggressive is one thing, deadly is another. I fink this is similar to that “old” toothbrush in the toilet bowl thingy: people don’t realise they could be killing somebody, when they just mean to be innocently passive-aggressive.

    Aug 13, 2007 at 7:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #59   Zsa

    oooh~ [email protected] I think that was the BEST, most Sanrkiest post in a long time!
    Thanks for the giggle~

    Aug 13, 2007 at 10:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #60   ShortAttentionSpa...huh?

    Perhaps the novelists among us could keep our posts under 4 chapters? It’s ‘leave a comment,’ not ‘leave 52 pages of inane fake dialogue.’

    Aug 13, 2007 at 3:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #61   [email protected]

    You’re right, ShortAttentionSpan, this comment forum is a SHARED SPACE.

    In the interests of ALL USERS let’s keep the comments short, shall we?

    Aug 13, 2007 at 4:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #62   BoggyWoggy

    Wait a minute! I just got it…the title…”did you ever consider the possibility that…oh, never mind.”
    The sandwich was pitched.Right? Am I right? C’mon. I need to know!

    Aug 13, 2007 at 5:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #63   BoggyWoggy

    Oh, and, shut-up, ShortAttentionSpan…huh? You must not be female. Males and females tend to have different views when it comes to length. To me, a comment is however long it takes for me to make my point.
    Also, have you ever heard of “skimming for information?”

    Aug 13, 2007 at 9:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #64   Craniac

    i worked one place where the predatory company president went thru employees’ lunches in the fridge and ate what he wanted everyday!

    Aug 14, 2007 at 2:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #65   Zsa

    Have to say my DAD would do the predatory midnight-muchies on my lunches. Sucked to get to school/work and have an apple and yogurt but no sandwich. And god forbid I packed a dessert… I think he had a 6th sense about that.

    Aug 14, 2007 at 9:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #66   Amanda

    I hope most of you are kidding, except for maybe PatHMV. You’re all taking this way too literally if you truly believe that she had a moldy sandwich that she intended to eat and was upset by it being filched. Whether or not the sandwich was actually edible (because it may well have been) the note is just supposed to make the thief feel uneasy about running off with someone else’s lunch.

    Aug 14, 2007 at 10:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #67   JoeDrinker

    What, did she just leave it in there and was meaning to throw it away?
    I like the group email send too…hopefully if the thief was in the restroom they got it on their blackberry.

    Aug 16, 2007 at 11:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #68   jay

    sorry to burst everyones bubbles… but if it was sent to more than one person wouldnt the ‘sent to’ part at the top of the email list all the email adresses not just one?

    meaning they knew or thought they knew who took the sandwich?

    Aug 17, 2007 at 1:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #69   Jimmy

    Nice to know that most commenters are female!

    Aug 30, 2007 at 10:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #70   mothers, lock up your crackers

    [...] related: did you ever consider the possibility that…oh, never mind. [...]

    Feb 8, 2009 at 5:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up


Comments are Closed