writes our anonymous submitter in corte madera, california: “we have a lot of passive aggressive notes up around the office, and most of them are addressed to the entire office staff in common areas. you can imagine my surprise when after eating lunch and going out for a smoke break with some coworkers today, we came back to find a bit of passive-aggressiveness on our lunch table — not 15 minutes after we had left it. grrrrr…”
more choice examples from this office — including yet another “your mother doesn’t work here” note — after the jump.
related: your mother doesn’t work here (or here, or here, or here)
EMAIL THIS POST TO A PAL!
100 responses so far ↓
#1 julie
i like the “ooo sassy!”
i don’t like the “note to self”–is the p-a note poster being p-a toward his/her self? it confuses me
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:04 pm rating: 0
#2 julie
*erm, himself
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:07 pm rating: 0
#3 BoggyWoggy
What if someone’s mom DOES work there? I think it’s OK to assume that mothers will clean up our crap! Actually, if you think about it, it’s good whenever you CAN leave a mess and let someone else clean it! Here’s why:
1) It gives some people sense of purpose.
2) It gets people’s blood pressure up.
3) It gives us a reason to use all CAP fonts as we make “reminder” notes for everyone else to suffer over.
4) If we didn’t leave messes, there would be few Passive-Aggressive Notes…and then, this website wouldn’t exist!
LEAVE MESSES WHENEVER POSSIBLE!
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:15 pm rating: 0
#4 WanderingPenguin
About the recycling bin: with it’s WHAT so accessible, I wonder?
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:35 pm rating: 0
#5 Anna-banana
I agree with the Boggster.
Also, I DO think that it’s a HUGE P-A example to put the cute itty bitty seal pup on the recycling note. That SCREAMS P-A–>oh, here I am. Cute little seal pup. Let me thank you personally for throwing your Red Bull can in the correct bin. Because that single act will save me.
What the note doesn’t consider is a human ready to club it for its pelt.
And I would have to say the clubbing would be justified….because the pup forgot to thank Terry.
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:37 pm rating: 0
#6 dawn
I love the grateful polar bear on the second note! LOL!!!
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:43 pm rating: 0
#7 claw71
I’m really not getting a good vibe off of that first note on the table. As GhostWriter might say, it’s a bit over the top. I believe the submitter planted that one for a little unnecessary emphasis. After all, you can’t get more passive aggressive than a seal pup. Or tasty…if I lived in the Arctic Circle I think I might apply my 45 minute rule to them. I bet they taste like marshmallows.
I love the recycling comment: that’s one small step for a can; one giant leap…
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:47 pm rating: 0
#8 dawn
Err, seal pup!
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:48 pm rating: 0
#9 Anna-banana
#6-Dawn-uh, HELLO?
Go call Encylopedia Brown, please. He’ll explain the difference between polar bears and fur seals.
And also who stole Claw’s vib(rator).
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:51 pm rating: 0
#10 claw71
By the way…I take offense to these mother comments. Do mothers really pick up after people? Mine sure didn’t. On the rare occasion she wasn’t passed out in a pool of her own urine she’d spray spit 151 rum on us and fling lit Virginia Slims at us while she screamed, “You’ve come a long way, bay.”
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:51 pm rating: +2
#11 Anna-banana
Sorry, Dawn. You were too quick for me!
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:51 pm rating: 0
#12 GVI
I guess whenever i go back into office work, i will have my mom get hired to so she can clean up behind me, and push my chairs back and close doors behind me, that way whenever a Your Mon Doesn’t Work Here sign goes up i can be like “oh yes she does”
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:53 pm rating: 0
#13 GVI
Wouldnt it be easier to have the recycling bin next to the trash can though?? why have it sandwiched between the fridge and the coffee pot?
Sep 11, 2007 at 10:56 pm rating: 0
#14 Anna-banana
‘put the chairs back where they belong’-it must be nice to belong somewhere….
My mother doesn’t work ‘here’ and certainly doesn’t work ‘just like the kitchen’. I didn’t know a kitchen could work.
MMmmmm…yummy. A recycling bin sandwich
Sep 11, 2007 at 11:01 pm rating: 0
#15 claw71
It’s late (which means it’s early in the comment process but let me go ahead and get it out of the way…to the tune of “Renegade” by Styx:
Whoa momma I’m in fear for my life of the chick who posts notes on the wall.
I left a mess in the office kitchen and I didn’t clean it up at all.
A seal pup near the office dump
wants me to recycle
I left a drawer open a crack
it seemed such a trifle
One dirty Rubbermaid, made me such a renegade
I’m a wanted man
Sep 11, 2007 at 11:06 pm rating: 0
#16 claw71
True story…I actually worked in an office where the manager posted a note in the break area that simply said “You’re mother doesn’t work here…keep the break room clean.” I took a black Sharpie and wrote: “Yeah, ’cause she died of cancer, asshole” on it. Wouldn’t you know that note disappeared and was replaced with a simple “Please Keep the Area Clean” sign.
On a side note, it’s really easy to transpose letters. I almost confessed to writing with a sharpei. Boy would PETA have been pissed on that one.
Sep 11, 2007 at 11:12 pm rating: 0
#17 Wry Exchange
That table in the top photo needs refinished, or maybe just some great placemats. You know, ones with fat, Italian chefs.
Sep 11, 2007 at 11:14 pm rating: 0
#18 BoggyWoggy
Tomorrow, I’m going to take a stand in our staff room. I think for a “lounge” to be any good, it has to have a bit of a “lived in” look. Therefore, I’m going to leave a dirty plate and silverware on the table. Someone will clean it up. I’ll sneak in afterwards and re-dirty the plate and put it right back where I had it originally! Ha, ha!
Sep 11, 2007 at 11:41 pm rating: 0
#19 Sharona
I think the submitter should retaliate with a sign of their own, complaining about thoughtless people wasting paper and leaving notes all over the tables for others to pick up. Maybe with a picture of a spotted owl saying “GTFO!”
Sep 12, 2007 at 12:31 am rating: 0
#20 marla
In defense of the first and last notes, they were probably written by a miffed secretary/admin ass. In most offices where I have worked, people expect that the secretary will clean up any shit they leave lying around in the common areas. It’s just insulting more than anything else. Having birthday cake? Great, I’ll stay at my desk so the phones are covered, and when you’re finished I’ll come in to clean up so you can all go back to your desks.
Sorry, that got a bit wanky. I’ll clean up.
Sep 12, 2007 at 12:33 am rating: 0
#21 Sharona
Marla, leaving the note on the table is just a nutty way to handle it. Think about it…The person must have had it typed, printed, and ready to whip out at the first sign of an inadequately cleaned table or chairs not “where they belong.” You’d think that amount of grim suppressed anger could be put to more creative use.
Sep 12, 2007 at 12:53 am rating: 0
#22 Momma
I can’t stand these kind of notes. I scrawled “eat shit and die” on the one at my work. It was hilarious to watch my boss flip out. Lol!
Sep 12, 2007 at 1:40 am rating: 0
#23 Momma
And yes, ironically my nickname is Momma.
Sep 12, 2007 at 1:41 am rating: 0
#24 Siegs
That recycling bin sandwich was fucking delicious!
Sep 12, 2007 at 1:48 am rating: 0
#25 Dymphna
I resent the implication that my mother cleans up after *anyone*.
Sep 12, 2007 at 4:38 am rating: 0
#26 Momma
Haha…I agree.
Sep 12, 2007 at 4:39 am rating: 0
#27 Steph
You know, my mom used to nag me to clean up my messes too. If it quacks like a duck…
Sep 12, 2007 at 6:18 am rating: 0
#28 Anna-banana
Please note:
no cute & fuzzy Arctic seal pups were hurt in the making of these comments.
Nor is clubbing them to be tolerated. ESPECIALLY, ’cause my mother won’t clean it up.
Sep 12, 2007 at 7:42 am rating: 0
#29 dawn
Hey, Anna, no problem - I needed chastizing for confusing two totally different types of cute, white, Artic-region environmental mascots. I blame Al Gore for making me immediately think of polar bears.
Now that I ponder the notes some more, I really like the “Oooo, sassy”. Makes for a good chuckle first thing in the morning. I must find a way to anonymously scrawl that on something at work.
I love the idea of chastizing the note writers for wasting paper!
Sep 12, 2007 at 7:53 am rating: 0
#30 claw71
If it quacks like a duck you’re probably watching an AFLAC commercial. What does that mean in this context? I thought we were talking about seals…mean, nasty, man-eating seals.
Sep 12, 2007 at 8:21 am rating: 0
#31 Fraulein N
That seal pup was fucking delicious.
The second note with the short, smart-ass sentences is classic p-a. Also if my mom DID work there she sure as hell wouldn’t be cleaning anybody’s damn silverware.
Sep 12, 2007 at 9:03 am rating: 0
#32 Minox
I think #19 Sharona has the best idea… maybe next to the ‘Thank you’ from the seal pup, write out: ‘ … for destroying the rainforests with these signs’.
Sep 12, 2007 at 9:04 am rating: 0
#33 Misheeâ„¢
#30 Fraulein - I said “DAMN” out loud reading your comment cause I thought everyone forgot that there should be something that is “Fucking delicious” in this post… One day I will be the first!! These notes are hilarious though, and someone forgot to recycle their Mountain Dew can in the first pic. Just in case they don’t know (or care to know) the recycle bin is between the coffee pot and the fridge…
Thank you Terry!
Sep 12, 2007 at 9:15 am rating: 0
#34 Goldie
Does anyone else find it disturbing that this person actually browses through the office garbage bin to see what belongs there and what doesn’t?
Sep 12, 2007 at 9:25 am rating: 0
#35 claw71
I went clubbing with Seal once. I thought I’d pick up the hot chicks because his face looks like Bugs Meany (or Dick Cheney) shot him with some bird shot, but the dude’s got charisma. That’s those damned british accents for you. Now he’s tapping prime super model booty and I’m stuck with Kathy Griffin. And yes, in case you were wondering, she does have man parts. Why do you think she likes gay guys so much?
Sep 12, 2007 at 9:48 am rating: 0
#36 claw71
I browse through the office garbage looking for half-eaten pastries, candybars and floor cookies.
I’ve got to have something to get me through that 45 minute waiting period.
Sep 12, 2007 at 9:51 am rating: 0
#37 claw71
And seals don’t care about rain forests, you dummy. They live in the ocean. Hello? No trees in the ocean. In fact, I think seals wouldn’t mind rising sea levels at all and since polar bears eat them it’s probably OK for the ice caps to melt too. Seals don’t need polar ice.
Sep 12, 2007 at 9:55 am rating: 0
#38 the sos
uh, my mom was the queen of passive aggressive - notes and otherwise. seeing a note like that on the table would only serve to convince me that she did, in fact, work there. kind of like a really bitchy super hero that you never quite get a good look at…
who was that masked motherly maid, anyway?
actually, i would passive aggressively find out who the fuck left that note and leave them a note informing them that my mother’s been pushing up daisies for twenty years and while i may be a slob i’m not an idiot and i’ll accept their apology on my very tidy desk. au statt.
Sep 12, 2007 at 10:07 am rating: 0
#39 GhostWriter
Yaa, did ya hear the one about the baby seal who walked into a club?
bada-bing!
Sep 12, 2007 at 10:15 am rating: 0
#40 GhostWriter
Yaa- that’s not quite right… lemme see now, The baby seal crawls into a bar! Yaa- and the bartender asks him, “What’ll you have? and he replies, “Anything but Canadian Club!”
…the one-two punch!
Sep 12, 2007 at 10:19 am rating: 0
#41 Little Miss Sunshine
To Wry Exchange (#17): ooo, sassy!
Sep 12, 2007 at 10:33 am rating: 0
#42 Heather
Is the arctic seal our first example of a passive-agressive animal?
Sep 12, 2007 at 10:35 am rating: 0
#43 Kristi
Claw71 - Brilliant!
“I bet they taste like marshmallows.”
Almost peed myself on that one!
Sep 12, 2007 at 11:03 am rating: 0
#44 adri
That baby seal was fucking delicious.
Sep 12, 2007 at 11:29 am rating: 0
#45 Katzndogz
“There is really no excuse not to recycle with it’s so accessible.”..what?
Sep 12, 2007 at 11:29 am rating: 0
#46 adri
Damn, how did I miss the earlier one?
(Hi, by the way. Recently discovered the site.)
Sep 12, 2007 at 11:31 am rating: 0
#47 Mel
i love the fact that i work in an office that if i leave a dish in the sink, to say, soak, and i “forget” about it, the next morning it’s clean. so, apparently, my mom does work here..which is weird, because she never cleaned up after us as kids, we totally had to do all the chores in the house cause she worked all the time raising us two brats cause my dad never sent his child support check on time and we spent a lot of time home alone, which is why, sometimes, I forget that i have a dish soaking in the sink and it isn’t really very nice to leave it for the cleaning ladies, nice as they are to clean up after a slob like me
Sep 12, 2007 at 11:35 am rating: 0
#48 lauralaiwc
#44, you beat me to it. great grammar, really. glad to see people review their PA-notes before posting them.
i wonder if people think the whole “your mom doesnt work here” is original? or clever? or cute? or a good way to get people to do things for them? someone must because these things are all over the place.
someone taped a note like that to a breakroom table where i worked eons ago and the area all around it was spotless, but everyone made a point to dirty up the sign, which couldnt be cleaned, with food stains. it was gross but the note went away. at least, to the wall instead of the table.
Sep 12, 2007 at 11:44 am rating: 0
#49 the sos
not that you care not to know, but clubbed baby seals go beside the copier. thanks Terry!
Sep 12, 2007 at 11:50 am rating: 0
#50 lauralaiwc
if they would have used a polar bear i might be inclined to actually recycling or, you know, that preserve the endangered species stuff.
but they used a baby seal. thats just crossing the line.
im going to hop into my H2 and polute the air now.
Sep 12, 2007 at 12:13 pm rating: 0
#51 mere
i’m with noter #1- i love the ‘ooo sassy!’.
i would not clean my silverware just to spite the note writer(s). he he he.
Sep 12, 2007 at 12:21 pm rating: 0
#52 lola
my mom and sis actually DID work together for a long time - I wonder if she would be exempt from cleaning up after herself
Sep 12, 2007 at 12:26 pm rating: 0
#53 claw71
If I worked with my mother I’d stab myself in the neck with a letter opener.
Sep 12, 2007 at 12:39 pm rating: 0
#54 Jen
I think my mom does work there - she keeps leaving her cr*p all over the kitchen
Sep 12, 2007 at 12:43 pm rating: 0
#55 ShagNBag
team sassy
Sep 12, 2007 at 1:08 pm rating: 0
#56 Sasha
Yeah claw, well I do work with my mother. Granted it is a 500 person company and we work in different departments. Yet there are many times I feel the urge to stab myself in the neck with a letter opener. I am 30 and she still has a little comments to make if I don’t pop my head in her office on my way out the door!
Sep 12, 2007 at 1:11 pm rating: 0
#57 ALA
Mishee (#32) that mountain dew was fucking delicious, and I’M NOT SORRY that I didn’t recycle the can!
Sep 12, 2007 at 1:33 pm rating: 0
#58 Mel
That table’s rank anyway! What diff would a bit of a wipe-up make! Really. P’shaw.
Sep 12, 2007 at 1:43 pm rating: 0
#59 the sos
“Just like the kitchen, your mother doesn’t work here either.”
Are they pointing out that the kitchen doesn’t work there???
Sep 12, 2007 at 1:59 pm rating: 0
#60 Mark O.
The “ooo sassy” party is MADE OF WIN.
Sep 12, 2007 at 2:09 pm rating: 0
#61 turrboenvy
Until December, I worked for the same company as my mother. Fortunately, in different states!
Now, my mother and my wife work for the same university — different office, and at least for now, different building. I fear for my wife when her department is moved to that building.
That food-stained P/A note is killing Anthony.
Sep 12, 2007 at 2:38 pm rating: 0
#62 GhostWriter
Plotline from the first episode of “Journeyman”, this fall on NBC :
Dan Vassar’s hands are trembling, his brow is sweaty, and his mind is racing. Having traveled to the past, and interacted with what “had been”, he is now coming to the realization that what he believes to be “the future” is hopelessly distant from the upcoming events he has managed to kick off. Can he even return to his own time, now that his meddlings have obstructed the very streams of time that lead to it?
As he swirls through the possibilities of non-existence and a myriad of altered states, banging his persona against the hard portals of past, present and future times, he finally lands, beaten and exhausted, spewn out of a rapidly oscillating time doorway. Artifacts blink into and out of existence as Dan attempts to seal the doorway and foundationalize space/time.
He rolls to the left, and reaches into his pocket to pull out a micro-recorder; his always-carried reference method to past events. Clicking on the Record button, he croaks into the microphone,
“Note To Self: If it’s too hard for you to close these doors, maybe you shouldn’t be opening them.“
Sep 12, 2007 at 3:27 pm rating: 0
#63 claw71
Speaking of “Journeyman” is that not a rather transparent rip off of “Dead Zone”? Kevin McKidd bears a striking resemblance to Anthony Michael Hall and from what I’ve seen in the previews it would appear they share the same acting coach.
It’s not the first time this has happened. Lost is just a flimsy reworking of Gilligan’s Island. The show’s creators thought they could fool me by ditching Gilligan and pulling a gender switch on Mary Ann (Jack) and Ginger(Sawyer), but I caught on quick.
Sep 12, 2007 at 3:45 pm rating: 0
#64 Misheeâ„¢