our anonymous contributor works part-time (through a non-profit) at a large, “troubled” high school in milwaukee. today, while making some copies, she found this anonymous wonder.
no sarcasm left behind
September 27th, 2007 · 188 comments
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Tags: milwaukee · office · raging against the machine · sarcasm
188 responses so far ↓
#1 Team Cassandra
ps. Its a little hard to keep test scores up in a nasty environment….just sayin’…
Sep 27, 2007 at 10:41 pm rating: 0
#2 Lashes
Those test scores were fucking delicious!
Sep 27, 2007 at 10:45 pm rating: 0
#3 GVI
Damn You Lashes!!
But what I want to know is what is going on in the halls, is the Heisa Monster out there at lunch?
Sep 27, 2007 at 10:50 pm rating: 0
#4 Wade
Maybe if they stopped serving Muscle Milk during the lunch hours, the climate might improve.
Sep 27, 2007 at 10:52 pm rating: +1
#5 lola
The lack of color and font variation is depressing, much like the kids’ futures, I suspect.
It’s Milwaukee. The public schools suck. Period.
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:01 pm rating: 0
#6 Wry Exchange
Frisk those advocacy kids for weapons when you hug them! Every little bit helps.
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:02 pm rating: 0
#7 Lashes
Sorry GVI. I’ve always wanted to do that!
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:18 pm rating: 0
#8 Wade
After 3 three years of observing the advocacy kids dumping potting soil and peanut shells in the hallways during lunch hours, the staffer had two choices: bring in the heisa monster or print a sarcastic note and leave it in the copy room.
P-A prevailed again!
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:19 pm rating: 0
#9 morpho aurora
great snapshot of the educational system in milwaukee.
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:21 pm rating: 0
#10 GVI
Yeah you should be Lashes, you beat me to it lol.
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:25 pm rating: 0
#11 Dave Ward
Wow. That note is hardcore.
Those sloppy joes were fucking delicious!
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:40 pm rating: 0
#12 WanderingPenguin
See, I kind of thought the appropriate response would have been, “That principal was fuckin’ delicious!” since, you know, that would explain why you never see him in the halls. But hey, that’s just me.
One bright spot: at least everything was spelled and punctuated properly in the note. That bodes well for the school’s future.
Team high test scores and low morale!
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:44 pm rating: 0
#13 WanderingPenguin
And I must say I do find it amusing that about a week ago I seemed to be the only one (or one of a VERY few) still dragging that “fucking delicious” joke back from life support only to be lambasted for doing so. Now I see four or five attempts per thread and nobody seems to be upset. What’s up with that? (in the whiny voice of Jerry Seinfeld…)
Not complainin’, mind yeh, jus’ sayin’… (now I’m talking in an old, toothless, hick voice…)
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:47 pm rating: 0
#14 lola
WP - keep fightin’ the good fight
revenge is best served when it’s fucking delicious
Sep 27, 2007 at 11:49 pm rating: 0
#15 Pot Still 'shiner
I am on team “fucking delicious”!
…and Thanks Terry
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:01 am rating: 0
#16 GVI
So does this mean that the fuckin delicious, is now fuckin delicious?
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:12 am rating: 0
#17 GVI
ps. shouldn’t we be thanking Kerry now?
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:12 am rating: 0
#18 Juliet
Pot still ’shiner, you beat me to the “Thank You Terry”!
Team Disgruntled Lunch Time Hall Monitor!!
I am a Special Education Assistant I have worked in a school quite like the school described. I’ve seen all kinds of shenanigans, I’ve had kids blatantly ignore me; and also run away from me with the correct belief I could not chase them down. It’s funny now, but I totally relate to this P-A note. Without the principal backing you up it is hell. Hell, I tell you!
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:24 am rating: 0
#19 Juliet
I had to police middle school children around throwing sn0wballs! So retarded! Have you ever tried it? It’s an exercise in futility; just like willing the weather to be tropical and sunny during many Northern American winters is futile. Seriously, why bother? Let their parents sort it out I say.
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:31 am rating: 0
#20 Tallulah
Good thing Anthony Grosso doesn’t work there. He’d have to suck up all the horrible things Rene Hall is doing to him (Raping and killing him with cigarette smoke ) and focus ONLY on bring up the test scores, and oh yeah can’t forget the hugs!
Thanks Terry.
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:36 am rating: 0
#21 Canthz_B
@#20 Authority figures throwing in the towel out of frustration, and you parents (I mean those that show up for parent-teacher meetings, not the cry-babies) are wondering why Johnnie can’t read? Discipline your brats before you send them out of your home . That or visit them where the State places them after trial.
Team Mine Were Home Schooled And Are In College
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:48 am rating: 0
#22 Lashes
WP: Good call on the principal being fucking delicious. GVI damned me for beating him to it and I now damn you for one uping me on my first ever chance to be the first to say something was fucking delicious. DAMN YOU WP DAMN YOU!
And I agree that fucking delicious is fucking delicious.
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:52 am rating: 0
#23 Canthz_B
Teaching kids how to pass a test instead of how to think is fucking delic.., well, just plain dumb.
Sep 28, 2007 at 1:01 am rating: 0
#24 GVI
Education is over-rated anyways. Who needs to read and write?
Sep 28, 2007 at 1:04 am rating: 0
#25 Canthz_B
Any Bookie!
Sep 28, 2007 at 1:06 am rating: 0
#26 Brandi
This comment does not particularly pertain to this post but why must every other word on these responses be an F-word??? It shows such a lack of class. I am not trying to be a some uptight fussbudget or anything. I was just wondering.
Sep 28, 2007 at 3:22 am rating: 0
#27 Jen
Brandi was fucking delicious.
Sep 28, 2007 at 5:29 am rating: 0
#28 Andy
Jen: LOL
Brandi: Well, I would think the only time you really see a F-bomb is when it is accompanied by ‘delicious’.
I still contend it goes back to the Outback bread post, and it doesn’t have the same “I don’t care about you, fuck you!” quality if you substitute the wording. WP, I’m one of the ones that has used it since its’ inception, I just try to find my spot.
It seems that “Thanks Terry!” runs neck-and-neck with this gem, so your mileage may vary.
As for the note, that’s just sad. It just has such a tone of surrender to it. That’s not a surprise it’s from a Milwaukee school. It’s good to know that Wisconsin being a top-5 tax state means top-notch schools, no?
Sep 28, 2007 at 7:04 am rating: 0
#29 heisa
those kids were fucking delicious.
Sep 28, 2007 at 8:19 am rating: 0
#30 Katy
I think cussing should no longer be taboo. If you’re going to cuss, go for the gold. It’s not going to make someone bleed or their head explode.
Oh, and those advocacy kids were fucking delicious. XD
Sep 28, 2007 at 8:19 am rating: 0
#31 Katy
heisa: great minds think a like. You rock.
Sep 28, 2007 at 8:20 am rating: 0
#32 Katy
alike* rather…damn
Sep 28, 2007 at 8:20 am rating: 0
#33 Fraulein N
Jesus. This is the most depressing sort-of PA note ever.
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:06 am rating: 0
#34 Josh
No child left behind is fucking delicious.
And yeah, you don’t know me.
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:23 am rating: 0
#35 GhostWriter
I love blamecasting Bush! First it was Katrina, and now we’ve pinned the hallways’ lack of improvement on him and his administration. We can always count on him to igonre the school climate, if global warming is any indication.
…and although there have been many contenders this post, ( and for some odd reason, they still seem funny today- especially with a newcomer like Brandi) my nomination for “Mr. Fucking Delicious Milwaukee” is: Dave Ward and the Sloppy Joes! He earned extra points for bringing up a non-obvious but entirely appropriate food item.
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:25 am rating: 0
#36 Jesus Christ
What do you want ME to do about it?
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:26 am rating: 0
#37 fussbudget
stick to your guns Brandi, fussbudgeting is a lost art form
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:27 am rating: 0
#38 Jesus Christ
A plague on your hallways!
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:28 am rating: 0
#39 mere
so, to sum up:
the heisa monster ate the kids. they were fucking delicious.
thanks terry for everything.
jesus would rather there be crowded halls, as long as noone parks on the school lawn..
and someone stole my muscle milk and hot pockets.
is that right?
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:31 am rating: +1
#40 GhostWriter
[aarrrrrttckkk!!] Attention all students - now playing in the hallways during lunch hours… “Dave Ward and the Sloppy Joes!”
That is all [clickktt!]
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:41 am rating: 0
#41 the sos
i parked on your lawn to worship jesus, and like a good fellow christian i thank him that childrens are learning - especially in laverne & shirlytown. and not that you care not to know, but the peanut shells, dirt, and ??? go behind the copier next to the heisa montser. thanks terry!
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:49 am rating: 0
#42 T-Bone
That note is really sad. It’s a helluva thing to have to wake up in the morning and be faced with obstacles like that, particularly when you’re a teacher. I get the impression they are laboring under complete chaos there. Very depressing. I’d write a note like that too!
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:53 am rating: 0
#43 lauralaiwc
#25, i wish you would have written that:
ejukashon iz overaited neway. hoo kneeds 2 reed and rite?
but i feel for the teacher who wrote this dripping with sarcasm note. parents dont discipline their crappy kids, and then “authority figures” leave their balls at home in their purse. so there is no one backing them. its a vicious circle.
Sep 28, 2007 at 9:58 am rating: 0
#44 Raymond
It’s a highschool for ‘troubled’ kids, which means they probably aren’t going anywhere in life anyways, right?
Sep 28, 2007 at 10:02 am rating: 0
#45 GVI
Aww man, I see what you mean Lauralai, oh well maybe next time.
Sep 28, 2007 at 10:05 am rating: 0
#46 WanderingPenguin
Lashes: not to worry - being first with the comment is still the, er….fucking deliciousest.
Andy: I know, I wasn’t actually bitter - I just play it on TV. I actually thought it was damned funny that things were slowing down on that front until somebody jumped on here for ONE comment and stirred the pot up….and now it’s an epidemic!
I love it when things work out that way.
Sep 28, 2007 at 10:38 am rating: 0
#47 little voice
We were talking about this very thing in our office yesterday. I feel so sorry for school kids. They won’t be able to function when they leave school. I hope I’m wrong!
Sep 28, 2007 at 10:46 am rating: 0
#48 Mishee
Does anybody else have a problem with these teachers hugging the kids? I mean, I don’t think that’s really allowed anymore, isn’t it? I just find that line kinda creepy in a non-creepy way.. I mean, I understand what they are saying, but some people might not, and there’s always the chance of those bad eggs being around too!
Sep 28, 2007 at 11:01 am rating: 0
#49 lola
I think she was being sarcastic about the hugs. I have a feeling the kids need something a little stronger than hugging.
Sep 28, 2007 at 11:10 am rating: 0
#50 mattiff
I blame mother, because as we all know “your mother doesn’t work here”. but if she did, those hallways would be much improved.
Sep 28, 2007 at 11:14 am rating: 0
#51 WanderingPenguin
Something such as muscle milk, lola?
Sep 28, 2007 at 11:31 am rating: 0
#52 lola
Teachers tend to get in trouble when they start administering muscle milk to jail bai… uh, teenagers
I imagine that the janitor closets are already full of pre-pregnant teens
Sep 28, 2007 at 11:42 am rating: 0
#53 Dave Ward
@Penguin: My personal goal is to deliberately run ‘fucking delicious’ into the ground so that nobody finds it funny anymore, and so that there’s nobody left who isn’t sick of it.
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:02 pm rating: 0
#54 Mishee
Well Dave the collective mental age of these posters is probably an average of about 16, so you might be waiting quite a while!
P.S. That personal goal is fucking delicious!!
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:16 pm rating: 0
#55 Mishee
And just so everyone knows, I was not excluding myself from the mental age comment above… I know what I am!
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:20 pm rating: 0
#56 Jesus Christ
All praise Dave, for he has a god complex.
Church wafers are NOT fucking delicious, but sloppy joes are the shiznittle. Amen.
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:23 pm rating: 0
#57 April
What the hell is an advocacy kid anyway?
Are they the ones advocating mayhem, death and destruction in the hallways or are they the future lawyers advocating change of hallway behavior? I’m confused. I’m pretty sure, either way, that you will note find me hugging them. That’s a lawsuit just waiting to happen.
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:30 pm rating: 0
#58 anglophile
An interesting note about the word fucking. It’s one of the few word in English that function as an infix, as in: “Will we ever see the principal in the hallway?” “Abso-fucking-lutely not!” It has its place in linguistics. Team F-bomb!
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:33 pm rating: 0
#59 April
Yeah, that “note” was supposed to be a “not” - sorry about that.
Team re-read before posting!
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:36 pm rating: 0
#60 Juliet
I second Dave’s personal goal. It is really fucking delicious.
I will savour it until the end.
Sep 28, 2007 at 12:48 pm rating: 0
#61 Team Cassandra
anglophile: You reminded me that (I think) it was George Carlin who taught me that the word: “fuck” is one of the only words in the English language that can be used in any way possible:
fuck (verb, exclamation), fucking (verb, adverb, adjective), fucked (past tense verb, adjective), fuckfaced (prefix), and so on…
Sep 28, 2007 at 1:08 pm rating: 0
#62 Andy
WP: I didn’t mean to seem like I was calling you out on anything, I was just talking like an old-timer, like “Back in my day…”
You’re right. There was a dry spell for awhile, now we are awash in it, not that it’s so horrible, in my opinion.
Sep 28, 2007 at 1:26 pm rating: 0
#63 Stephanie
Advocacy kids are like the behavioral class. The have entire schools devoted to them now. Because you can’t beat your kids anymore, so they become crime-committing, raping, thieving, pregnant teenagers. All thanks to Terry.
Sep 28, 2007 at 1:32 pm rating: 0
#64 Jen
Keep those English test scores up - if only they tested something the Advocacy Students could really get a fucking handle on
Sep 28, 2007 at 1:33 pm rating: 0
#65 Goldie
So what’s going on in those hallways?
Can I score some pot over there?
Sep 28, 2007 at 1:39 pm rating: 0
#66 claw71
To: Staff
Re: Re: Hallways During Lunch Hours.
It has come to my attention that there are some issues with the way the administration is handling the hallways during lunch hours. Sadly, during our most recent inservice day nobody seemed to have any suggestions. All of the teachers crowded toward the back of the room and refused to participate in the discussion.
Do you know why you don’t see your principal in the halls? Because he is in his office working. He is on the phone with the superintendent explaining low test scores. He is also on the phone with the city prosecutor trying to find out why teachers are hugging their advocacy students even though policy formally states that physical contact is forbidden. Your principal is working so hard trying to keep this school from going under that it makes him wonder who on his staff has enough time to lament the condition of the hallways. Furthermore, the principal is wondering why somebody on his staff, a staff granted considerable authority over the students, would feel powerless to address the issues in the hallway. You are a teacher and while you might have more productive things to do than bitch and moan you are well within the scope of your power to DO YOUR FRIGGING JOB!
PS: If you don’t get those test scores up you’ll be working at McDonalds where those advocacy students will be your supervisors.
Sep 28, 2007 at 2:09 pm rating: 0
#67 GhostWriter
The note may have been an actual memorandum from the real school Principal (who acts just like Michael from “the Office”).
He’s just trying to offer the teachers some sage advice: “If you don’t like the hallways, then stay the heck out of them, like I do!”
Sep 28, 2007 at 2:09 pm rating: 0