Going up?

October 2nd, 2007 · 53 comments

Anna brings us this charitable little note from the her apartment building in London, Ontario.

“Anytime Stan” — proof that Canadians really are the nicest people on earth?

p.p.s. and lay off the corn!

Meanwhile, in Milwaukee

Many thanks to whoever puked in here...

And lastly, a vaguely dadaist interpretation, in what very well may be another one of L.A.’s elevator-cum-film sets.

related: cross-country elevator action

FILED UNDER: Canada · CAPS LOCK · elevator · ellipses-crazed · Los Angeles · Milwaukee · neighbors · Ontario · p.s. · vomit


53 responses so far ↓

  • #1   lola bang

    I’m enjoying the note that was torn down, crumpled, then apparently retaped for others’ viewing pleasures.

    BTW, Milwaukee, it’s not nice to call advocacy kids “animals.” Play nice or I’m gonna smear poop on your front porch.

    Oct 2, 2007 at 11:57 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #2   Rufus T. Firefly

    That vomit was fucking delicious.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 12:05 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Paisley bang

      Oh, that is quality, hahaha!

      Apr 3, 2009 at 8:59 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   lola bang

    Oh no you didn’t!

    ICK

    Actually, if the chunks were big enough, it’s almost like it was never eaten in the first place…

    Oct 3, 2007 at 12:15 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   DonkeyCock

    Team Anytime-Stan … This guy should get a Nobel Prize…

    Oct 3, 2007 at 12:19 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   morpho aurora bang

    “if you find any situation like that” – jesus, stan, don’t give them anymore ideas. his p.s. is funny, tho.
    and nothing is worse than a male cat hitting the elevators.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 12:41 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   BoggyWoggy

    The first notice was so sweet…until the bitter end!
    Hey, at least puke is a bit better than what we put in a dorm elevator in college…
    heh, heh, heh…
    more to come…

    Oct 3, 2007 at 1:31 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Andy bang

    So, with the third one, does it light up when it’s your cue to yak? Cool.

    “Can you puke with more feeling, this time? I want you to imagine you’re hurling right through the camera, yeah, that’s it.”

    Good ol’ Anytime Stan. Ever since he was fired from Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood, he’s been trying to make a go of it.

    Finally, the second note. If I made a mess, and it doesn’t stink, then I don’t have to clean it up? Cool.

    Firstly, that should cover them all. I am in need of a note that gives us a new catch-phrase, though. The wait continues…

    Oct 3, 2007 at 2:05 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   Potbelly

    I like how the Vomit elevator is on “P”.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 2:27 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   marla

    Leaving angry notes to animals? That’s a new low. When did an animal ever do that to you?

    Oct 3, 2007 at 2:57 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   claw71 bang

    Stan’s a great guy and an expert in mastication.

    Boy, is my face red. I always thought the “P” on that display was for urination. Here I’ve been pissing in elevators all over town when it was prompting me to puke. Oops.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 6:31 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   The Upchucker

    Thanks for the advice on mastication, Stan! And Milwaukee I appreciate your thanks and yes I do enjoy living in a dumpster, thanks for asking! And finally thanks to L.A. for giving me a clear indication of where my talents are welcome.

    Now… raaallllllppphhhhh. Yeeeaaaarrrrgggghhhh!

    Oct 3, 2007 at 8:41 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   urban bohemian

    I’m just impressed by the lovely penmanship of Vomit. Nice work!

    Oct 3, 2007 at 9:26 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   Fraulein N

    Aww. Y’all, I heart Stan. Bless him.

    Also, everybody know animals can’t read, Milwaukee!

    Oct 3, 2007 at 9:27 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Wry Exchange

    Mom works in Canada, and her name is…STAN??

    Oct 3, 2007 at 9:33 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Denagh

    Go STAN! Sweet upchuck cleaning guy…or……Collector of regurgitation? Hmm..One has to ponder.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 9:40 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   mere bang

    exactly HOW are you supposed to clean your vomit in the elevator? do they have cleaning supplies stashed somewhere? a hidden compartment or something?
    so.. you puke, and you think ‘wow, i should really clean this’, but you have to get OFF the elevator to get your supplies from your apartment, and you run, but the elevator door closes.. so you’re standing in the hallway with your cleaner and your mop, just waiting…
    and waiting…
    meanwhile, stan gets on the elevator with some animals from milwaukee..
    and the rest is history.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 10:09 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   anna-banana bang

    Anytime Stan-he’s my man, if he can’t clean it no one can!

    Stan: wanna come clean my flat?

    And to #9 Marla….my damn cat just puked on the living room rug. Uh, Stan?

    Oct 3, 2007 at 10:24 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   Juliet bang

    I hope that number Stan left is a cell phone number. Because even if he is in Murmansk, if someone upchucks in the elevator, he’d better come and clean it up immediately.

    I definitely want Stan to come and clean my house. But will I have to puke on the rug (we don’t have an elevator) in order to make it happen?

    Oct 3, 2007 at 11:07 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   GhostWriter

    Team Anytime–Stan!

    …although, I harbor a slight suspicion that it was he who puked in the elevator…

    Oct 3, 2007 at 11:17 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Wade bang

    I’m still wondering if Stan’s helpful hint is a kind attempt to prevent further upchucking, or a commentary on what the upchucker left behind.

    Let’s hope it wasn’t a donair pizza.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 11:35 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Mrs L Carrot

    I like the nutritional advice from Anytime Stan – who, by the way, is clearly a saint. That food was fucking delicious! Too fucking delicious to chew properly, evidently.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 11:56 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   claw71

    Stan really is the man.

    I’ve cleaned up what I assume is my fair share of barf over the years and I have never examined it long enough to ponder whether the culprit had sufficiently chewed his or her food.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 12:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   anna-banana bang

    Claw: that’s because the barf was just sitting there. And after the 45 minute rule-you ate it

    Oct 3, 2007 at 12:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   anna-banana bang

    on fat chef placemats

    Oct 3, 2007 at 12:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   zsa

    I heart Anytime-Stan too~ But I bet all the girls say that. However he is not so bright, as Morpho pointed out, to say he will clean up “any situation like that”.

    Leaves us creative types with the thought… oh yeah? ANY situation like that? Well, what wouldn’t he clean up? Putz poop? Naw, too easy. Chemical residue? Could be interesting if you can get some neat colors.

    and for note #3… who in their right mind would ride the Vomit elevator?

    Oct 3, 2007 at 12:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   cre8tivewmn

    At first I thought Stan’s note was addressed to the upchucker and I was wondering what he planned to do to help him. The end of the note makes it clear, however.

    “Anytime Stan” has some potential as a catchphrase. We’ll have to see if it shows up in the days and weeks to come.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 1:10 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   Idigmusic bang

    Ummm, as someone who has lived in Milwaukee my whole life I have to be concerned by the number of P-A Notes suddenly popping up from my hometown. Are we really this passive aggressive? Is it something in the water here? I have to admit that I have known my fair share of P-A people(let’s not talk about my last boss), but is the city rampant with P-A people, all of whom take it out by writing notes? Or are we all just a bunch of advocacy-kid-hugging-puke-leaving assholes? On the other hand, we do drink alot of beer here. It’s hard to remember everywhere we’ve puked when we go to clean it up…….

    Oct 3, 2007 at 1:29 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Wade bang

    idigmusic – you can’t spell Pabst withou P-A, lol.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 1:50 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #29   GhostWriter

    Dear Anytime Stan,

    While I am incredibly embarrassed about the elevator, could you please take down your note? My Mom is near-suicidal; she was riding up last evening with a steaming hot tureen of her famous Hunter’s Stew, and when the elevator jarred to a stop (as you know it does) some stew sloshed onto the floor. After reaching my apartment, she almost immediately turned around, rag in hand, to clean up the mess, but by the time the elevator had returned to our floor, you had already cleaned it up and posted your note. I am really impressed with your speed, but my mother is mortified that her secret recipe seemed like vomit to you.

    - Sometime Sally in 703

    Oct 3, 2007 at 2:33 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Life With Buck

    Chew your food better? Sounds like classic bulemic bullshit.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 2:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   TAJ

    So this has nothing to do with the current post, but important news for all you PA fans! Check out this article: http://tinyurl.com/yq7ee3

    A woman stabbed her husband because he ate her pork chops out of the fridge! So for all you, “That whatever was fuckin’ delicious” people, beware, you might get stabbed!

    As much as I’m annoyed by PA’ness, I will admit, it’s better than other alternatives…

    Oct 3, 2007 at 4:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #32   Mishee bang

    That was a GREAT story TAJ!! My favorite is

    ‘She meant it as a joke. Had she not been so drunk, she would have poked him with the knife, but, struggling around drunk, she stabbed him.’

    “Eat my pork, feel my fork!”

    Oct 3, 2007 at 5:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   GVI bang

    I wonder if he said “That pork was fucking delicious.”

    Oct 3, 2007 at 5:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   WanderingPenguin bang

    Well, when you live on “Dagger Lane”…..

    And how do you “eat” someone’s tea, anyhow?

    Oct 3, 2007 at 5:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   WanderingPenguin bang

    BTW….what happened to the formatting box??

    Oct 3, 2007 at 5:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   anna-banana bang

    Hello? WP? I thought you lived in a country that worship’s the Queen as well? Up there in Toronto?

    Tea = supper/dinner

    Oct 3, 2007 at 5:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   anna-banana bang

    oops…worships

    Oct 3, 2007 at 5:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Liz

    What do you expect? It was homecoming this weekend in London (Go Stangs go!), and homecoming means parties, and parties for university kids is booze…

    Oct 3, 2007 at 8:49 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   Olivia

    Just generally speaking of notes in apartments buildings… do people actually read them? No one in my building does.

    Quick, someone give me that phone number that’s blurred out. I need to call Anytime Stan for an apartment showing STAT.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 8:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   GVI bang

    #35WP, maybe the Heisa Monster ate it.

    Oct 3, 2007 at 9:09 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   Canthz_B bang

    Anytime Stan has unrealistic expectations of his fellow man.
    As a prolific puker in my salad days, the only thing I was concerned got off of the floor after a call to Ralph was myself!

    Oct 3, 2007 at 10:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   WanderingPenguin bang

    Uh, no, we don’t “worship” the Queen here. :) And we certainly don’t refer to “dinner” as “tea”. Tea is a beverage and you cannot eat it. This is why I can never understand Great-Aunt Sadie from Stokely-on-Thames. Well, that and she is senile and toothless.

    And no, that wasn’t another crack about Georgia hicks.

    Oct 4, 2007 at 12:38 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Sazbot

    Awwwwww, Stan is so sweet.

    Oct 4, 2007 at 7:53 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   Brother McGregor UK Ministry bang

    perhaps this will get your attention
    sooner

    http://i20.tinypic.com/106n59v.jpg

    Oct 16, 2007 at 11:10 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   really, it’s the canadian thing to do

    [...] this portland resident could learn a lesson in politeness from our famously good-natured neighbors to the north? or, um, maybe [...]

    Mar 26, 2008 at 5:23 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   Qwerty

    You know, I hate to be cynical about such a seemingly benign figure as Anytime Stan, but does he have OCD? I mean. . . .”Knock at 301 at any time of the day or night”?

    Jun 2, 2008 at 4:10 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   where’s anytime stan when you need him? | passive-aggressive (and just plain aggressive) notes

    [...] related: going up? [...]

    Aug 13, 2008 at 3:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   D

    I wonder if the “Vomit” in the last one is meant to identify the substance in the elevator, or to instruct drunken passengers?

    Sep 29, 2008 at 12:05 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   Noireen

    I am now in love with Stan :)

    Nov 4, 2008 at 3:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #50   You don’t mess with Bob Mess. | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] Writes our anonymous submitter: “I don’t know who Bob Mess is, but I’ll be sure to summon him next time I pass by his office.” (Perhaps he was out commiserating with Anytime Stan?) [...]

    Dec 8, 2009 at 9:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #51   why i hate miami, exhibit a | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] related: going up? [...]

    Dec 9, 2009 at 9:29 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #52   Really, it’s the Canadian thing to do | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] this Portland resident could learn a lesson in politeness from our famously good-natured neighbors to the north? Or, um, maybe [...]

    Nov 17, 2011 at 6:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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