Eats, shoots and leaves

November 18th, 2007 · 165 comments

Joey in Pittsburgh spotted this one on the campus of Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh. Now that’s the thanksgiving spirit!

that's the thanksgiving spirit

Meanwhile, a different version of this photo floating around shows what appears to be a copy-edited version. ain’t punctuation grand?

nosoul.jpg

FILED UNDER: college life · garbage · Pittsburgh · You call that punctuation? · you're like so going to hell


165 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Troy McClure bang

    The comma version is great: “Damn! I knew it was somebody’s fault I’m so damned soulless!”

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:07 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #2   WanderingPenguin bang

    Wow. I so would have been the person who corrected that note. :) Team Lynne Truss FTW!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:07 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   WanderingPenguin bang

    What if people were using it as, say, an ashtray? Or a bird bath? Or an umbrella stand? Would I have someone else’s soul, then? Would I have some sole? Would I finally be able to understand wtf James Brown is saying? What???

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:09 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   WanderingPenguin bang

    Back to the correction thing, though: I still don’t think the semi-colon is what I would have done there. I would have put an exclamation point after each of the words “can” and “soul”. The semi-colon is still sort of ambiguous, like it’s thanking the asshats who are using the container as a trash can and “oh, by the way, if you are reading this – and this is totally off-the-cuff – you have no soul!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:12 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   Jason Adams

    Haha nice, I didn’t see it before it was corrected.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:32 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   Canthz_B bang

    For people who what? Have souls or use this container for trash? If the latter, I suspect a rude reception at #3613 Whatever it says! :-)

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:35 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Andy bang

    I love this one. The quibble I have is that someone had to photoshop a semicolon; dicks leave trash in a food drive barrel.

    If you read that statement just right (with the comma), they are saying that we have lost our souls because of a few douchebags. Way to ruin it for the whole human race!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   Troy McClure bang

    We wanted beans and Raisin Bran
    But strangers’ old chip packets an’
    Mostly drunk colas
    Are making you soulless
    When dropped in the donation can

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:49 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Jason Adams

    No one photoshopped a semi-colon. That is the actual picture. I took it with my cell phone at about 5pm the day it appeared (November 8).

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:51 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   Troy McClure bang

    CB, I looked it up: #3613 WeH, which is an abbreviation for Wean Hall, a building at CMU. (If “Rene” is short for “Irene”, then this rhymes with “Rene Hall!” But I hope it isn’t.)

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:53 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Jason Adams

    Rhymes with green, actually. :)

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:53 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   Canthz_B bang

    We have here a noble creation.
    We’re trying to feed,
    the less fortunate of the nation.
    We will not ask for your cash,
    But, or God’s sake,
    We don’t want your trash!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   Mishee bang

    I think anyone who doesn’t add at least one can to those things have NO SOUL! God, just donate that can of creamed corn that has been in your cupboard for 3 years! YOU AREN’T GONNA EAT IT APPARENTLY”

    Nov 18, 2007 at 6:57 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Canthz_B bang

    *preview button* :-(

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:00 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   brinkofacomplex bang

    I would marry the grammar corrector.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   pry

    i had already planned a comma splice comment. then i saw the second photo. *sigh*

    hilarious.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   Gez

    Team Truss; that semi-colon was fucking delicious!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:16 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   Canthz_B bang

    Th sign looks manually altered…note the second and third bricks down on the upper right-hand side. The sign has moved.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:21 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   HS

    I’m glad to see that someone was paying attention in English 101.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Troy McClure bang

    Jason, thanks. That’s what I was assuming. I was just thinking it would be funny if Rene used an alternate pronunication of her name to match. As in:

    Anthony Grosso and Rene Hall
    Both went to study in Wean Hall
    Rene flicked her ash
    But not into the trash
    Tony died, slumped o’er his mean scrawl

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Andy bang

    OK, fair enough. That semi-colon is just so much sharper and darker than the rest. I can’t call ‘em all, apparently. :D

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   Writer, Rejected

    Well, for goodness sake, what else can we expect from one of our finer institutions of higher learning, which is named after two robber-baron families from the greediest era in the the history of American capitalism? 1) A semicolon added to the embarrassment of a comma splice, and 2) trash to feed the poor. Would that it were a possibility; what a well-fed impoverished class we’d then have! Amen.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:38 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   Writer, Rejected

    (Only one “the” needed; I have a stutter tonight.)

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   Canthz_B bang

    OK…sorry…I cannot help it…That soul stealing is fucking delicious!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Troy McClure bang

    Wear it, CB. Wear the unitard.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:46 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   Canthz_B bang

    I’ve worn it before. I am now re-tarded!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:51 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   ShagNBag

    I have no soul myself (but I do have a little funk). Does that mean I can use the food drive container as a trash can?

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:52 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   GVI bang

    Team Food Drive!!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 7:54 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #29   Sam L. Jackson

    Don’t put your Jack-in-the-Box wrappers in that container, fool! That’s food for the mother-fuckin’ homeless! Nobody needs your mother-fuckin’ trash in their donated food. Don’t you think they feel mother-fuckin’ bad enough just comin’ down here to get this leftover shit?

    Nov 18, 2007 at 8:00 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Troy McClure bang

    GVI, Team Food Drive sounds like something from one of those jokes: “You know you’re a redneck when you & the boys take your pickups out for a Team Food Drive & come back all stocked up on roadkill.”

    Nov 18, 2007 at 8:02 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   Canthz_B bang

    *rim shot* :-)

    Nov 18, 2007 at 8:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #32   Canthz_B bang

    This is a very PA note though. A better direction could have been taken. Such as, “This is not a trash can”. The choice to become a “Reaper of souls” leaves me bewildered.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 8:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   courts bang

    My friend’s name is spelled, R-E-N-E, pronounced like the name “Renee”.
    And I don’t know why, but I also thought of Anthony Grosso’s Rene when I saw this note. Thank you Terry

    Nov 18, 2007 at 8:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   WanderingPenguin bang

    :| Yeah.

    Hate to be “that guy” (everyone: “again“), but we’re only two threads in to this new era and I am already pretty weary of SLJ’s one-trick pony comments. And yes, I am quite aware that my note will in all likelihood spur him on to dizzying heights…but there it is.

    Now back to my “Godfather_Of_Soul – English Dictionary”. But in the immortal words of Tower of Power:

    “It doesn’t matter what I’ve been through,
    I’ll still be diggin’ on James Brown.”

    :D

    Nov 18, 2007 at 8:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   Wade bang

    Let’s assume that:

    a. I have a food donation, and

    b. I have a soul

    According to the sign, I am supposed to take the donation to 3613 WeH.

    So, my question is, why is the food donation barrel still out?

    Nov 18, 2007 at 8:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   Troy McClure bang

    Thanks to the people who are using this PA Notes thread as a place to put off-topic complaints, you have no soul.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 8:55 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   Sam L. Jackson

    I say feed the homeless!
    Wandering Penguin, just what have you been through that can compare to what a Black man has been through? Dig on James Brown all you want to and you will never know the Mother-fucked Black Experience!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:03 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Canthz_B bang

    We’re talking about food distribution.
    Not dealing with race resolution.
    Keep your crap to yourselves.
    overburden your shelves,
    please stop topic dilution!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:10 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   Troy McClure bang

    What has he been through? He’s a fucking penguin! How about six months of howling winds and darkness at minus a hundred and fifty degrees? Does that give him any credibilty??

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:20 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   Sam L. Jackson

    FTR, I was on topic, and in character, The Penguin injected James Brown into the mix.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   GVI bang

    Are they implying that one’s soul is in his trash?

    ps. SLJ #41. A penguin is part black.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:31 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Writer, Rejected

    Penguins are BOTH black and white after all.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Wade bang

    Not to mention that he has wandered into the wrong damned hemisphere.

    wait. speaking of wandering, are we starting to drift?

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:35 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   Canthz_B bang

    And we love ours!!!
    Get a grip. Stay in character if you must, but not everything is an insult.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:35 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   Canthz_B bang

    Is that a hazmat barrel?

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   Canthz_B bang

    “Free food!…No, don’t worry about that green slime!”

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:38 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   Wade bang

    I have never understood why people use garbage cans to collect food donations. Doesn’t that send a subliminal message that your should use this as an opportunity to clean out the pantry, rather than give stuff people actually need?

    It may explain why the food bank is full of cans of cranberry sauce and heart of palm.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:40 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   Canthz_B bang

    Don’t knock it, I disposed of some canned asparagus that way! LOL
    But I gave damn it!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:44 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   WanderingPenguin bang

    FTR, “The Penguin injected James Brown into the mix” in post #3. “The Penguin” was still very much both on topic and in character. “The Penguin” also very much appreciates the recognition of both his duality, his suffering at the hands of Mother Nature and the hemispherically-challenged inner workings of his soul.

    And post #35 is messing up my tiny penguin brain. Damn you once again, Wade!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:53 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #50   WanderingPenguin bang

    But is that actually a garbage bin? It actually has a little of that “giant rentable juice keg” feel to it from this angle, IMO.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 9:55 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #51   Andy bang

    Or, it’s a chemical waste storage drum. :D

    You say toe-may-toe, I say, dike off.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #52   WanderingPenguin bang

    I think a chemical waste storage drum would be very appropriate if Mishee is going to insist on dropping off many-year-old-cans of creamed corn!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:06 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   GVI bang

    I bet that year old creamed corn would be …….

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:13 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #54   morpho aurora bang

    people who dump trash into food drive barrels are assholes – they know what they are doing. putting up a sign like this guarantees these morons are going to add half-eaten junk food and dirty diapers.
    it does look like a chemical waste drum, though :)

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:14 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #55   Mishee bang

    HEY! I don’t have JUST creamed corn ya know! I have chunk light tuna in oil – like I am gonna eat that!! I also have some other stuff that I am just too much of a snob to eat – or Hubby bought it and it’s just gross!!

    *stay on topic*
    *stay on topic*
    *stay on topic*

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:14 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #56   WanderingPenguin bang

    All right, sorry Mishee. I could have said “heart of palm”, instead. But that’s just too wrong even for me. :)

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:16 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #57   Mishee bang

    Oh God you just made me think maybe I should clean out my dad’s pantry! (I almost forgot the “R” in that last word – that could’ve been embarrassing!) He has some 6 year old Heart of Palm and other such delights in his cupboard.

    Maybe that kind of food is the “Trash” that 3613 WeH is talking about?

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #58   Andy bang

    Thank you, M-A.

    Hmm… I wonder if Hearts of Palm, Tuna and Creamed Corn casserole would be fucking delicious.

    Whoopee! I know the last side dish I’m making for Thanksgiving!

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:29 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #59   GVI bang

    Call it PAN’s delight.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:32 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #60   WanderingPenguin bang

    *rim shot squared*

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #61   Mishee bang

    Or even PAN Surprise.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 10:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #62   WanderingPenguin bang

    Joey, baby, your picture slayed me!
    I am disgusted, they’re maladjusted.
    A broken pen, an apple core,
    Some mouldy bread from days before,
    All in the blue bin that was
    S’posed to help the poor.
    And as you travelled past the can
    You took your camera phone in hand
    And sent the picture of the sign to us at “PAN” –
    Oh, Joey, may I say “You are Da Man”!

    Joey, honey – here’s something funny,
    The note’s been corrected, don’t be dejected!
    And if you start to feel distraught
    Your effort didn’t go for naught -
    The point’s the same if there’s a
    Comma there or not:
    Trash is not what that bin is for
    But still that sign will be ignored
    And if the desitute know
    What was there before,
    Oh, Joey, they’re not hungry anymore.

    Nov 18, 2007 at 11:06 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #63   Wade bang

    nice, WP

    :D

    Nov 18, 2007 at 11:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #64   Mishee bang

    *stay on topic*
    *stay on topic*
    *stay on topic*

    WP – you definitely don’t have to wear the unitard after that comment!

    Joey, I thought my brother was the only Non-Fictional man above the age of 14 that still goes by “Joey”…

    Nov 18, 2007 at 11:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #65   Troy McClure bang

    WP, nice one. I agree with Mishee—you can wear what you like. (Yes, even a penguin suit.)

    Nov 18, 2007 at 11:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #66   anglophile bang

    Meanwhile, five feet away, the janitor has posted the following sign on the trash can:

    “Thanks to the people who are using this trash can as a food drive container, you have no brain. For people who do please put your garbage directly in the dumpster.”

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:08 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #67   Troy McClure bang

    Anglophile, you’re awesome!

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:27 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #68   Gadget

    The donated food was f’ing delicious. Snatched it up before leaving some trash behind…..

    Yeah, getting a little soulless around here; but I’m good with it…..

    Nov 19, 2007 at 1:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #69   A.A guy

    It’s round and big and blue.It’s hiding around a corner.It begs to have my crumpled Lays bag in it.

    Team “I don’t toss my garbage on the floor”.

    *This note was previewed*

    Nov 19, 2007 at 2:23 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #70   Naomi

    Of course he has no soul! It’s freaking delicious!

    Nov 19, 2007 at 2:31 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #71   park rose

    #12, CB, perfect as it is,
    I was waiting for this line:
    And please don’t misuse,
    your punctuation.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 5:23 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #72   WickedLady bang

    I must say I like the first sign better.

    Team Grim Reaper!

    Nov 19, 2007 at 5:37 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #73   KB

    In all fairness, I can see how it would be possible to throw trash in there by accident. If you didn’t know there was a food drive going on, were walking and talking, and saw the big blue bin, I can see how you could mistake it for a trash can.

    Careless, yes. Soulless? Not really. Although I am sure there were some people doing it on purpose.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:41 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #74   FickleGal

    Most people are idiots. “It’s science.”

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:25 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #75   Writer, Rejected

    Maybe the food donation drive volunteers are the bastards without souls, here. Maybe, they should be more considerate and collect their cans of creamed-corn-heart-of-palm-oilytuna from Daddy’s Panties in something more fetching: say a party basket or a big happy box wrapped in festive silver and green foil paper. Just because people are hungry doesn’t mean they deserve a presentation reeking of garbage dumps. Everybody watches Martha Stewart, people. How hard is a little stylish presentation? (I think we’ve accomplished something important regarding the soul with this PAN posting.)

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:33 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #76   GhostWriter

    Today’s episode: “In Search Of… SDC Soul Traps

    Few people are aware of Carnegie-Mellon’s secret devil-worshipping cult, known on campus as “SDC“. Following incantations and séances intending to bring about the resurrection of the robber barons, they have succeeded in creating a Soul Trap (in a blue barrel.)

    When passing students disrespect the food drive by throwing trash into the barrel, their souls are captured. Note the total blackness of the barrel interior, that now holds over a dozen hapless souls.

    Of course, Gamma Phi Delta has protested this device, but so far has only succeeded in forcing SDC to (1) provide a separate box for donations and/or traps that does not steal souls, and (2) clearly describe and post the entire process above the barrel itself.

    The problem is, students never read the signs…
    mu whua ha Ha HA HA HAAA!!

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:56 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #77   Ariadne bang

    Has anyone noticed that in the second photo there is a white cardboard box stenciled with the words “Food Drive” sitting next to the blue garbage drum/toxic waste barrel? What happens if you throw garbage in there? Do I lose say, my psyche, instead of my soul? Or perhaps my ego? hmm…

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:56 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #78   Ariadne bang

    Also, food drives are an excellent repository for Ox Tail soup.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:57 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #79   wicked opinion

    oh…my…god….*gasp* penguins half black….*snort* surviving the cold….hee hee hee hee ….Daddy’s panties….*tears rolling* I muthafuckin’ LOVE this fucking delicious website. Shit. *still giggling*

    Nov 19, 2007 at 10:19 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #80   Mishee bang

    and I would also like to say congrats to anglo for getting Word!….

    *cough*you suck!*cough*

    Just kiddin!!! :D

    Nov 19, 2007 at 10:29 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #81   anglophile bang

    Ariadne, I think you’re on to something. They are rival food drives! The White Boxers are stuffing the Blue Barrelers’ container with trash in an effort to be the BFDOC (Big Food Drive On Campus). It’s just one of a long line of strong-arm tactics. Other incidents include the time the Blue Barrelers stuffed the White Boxes with leftovers collected from the cafeteria after Lutefisk and Limburger Day, and the time the White Boxers donated nothing but cans with the labels ripped off in the Blue Barrels. Something really ought to be done. It’s escalating to a full-blown turf war between rival gangs.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 10:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #82   Mishee bang

    How “West Side Story” anglo…

    Nov 19, 2007 at 10:36 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #83   Wade bang

    #82

    White Boxers, anglophile? After Labor Day? Trés gauche.

    Congrats on the Word! Well played.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 10:46 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #84   Ariadne bang

    There must have been a sign rivalry too, Anglophile – that sign is freakin’ huge! I just noticed it is almost as big as the blue drum itself! Joey was probably lucky to escape with his life – he could have easily knocked that sign over when he was photographing it and been crushed to death.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 10:46 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #85   Juliet

    Wade, you posted the comment I would have made (#35) about this sign.

    If the donations are supposed to go to a specific room, why oh why is there a barrel there? No wonder people are putting trash in it! It looks like a garbage can.

    I don’t have the “science” to back this up, but it is my belief that 85% of people don’t read signs. I used to work in a bookstore and people often couldn’t find books they were standing directly in front of. I call this ‘store blindness’ and it has happened to me in other stores. Although in this case, it is just ‘barrel blindness’.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 11:02 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #86   Wade bang

    Juliet

    Especially signs taped to the side of the barrel and half covered by the opposing food drive box and the brick column.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 11:13 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #87   Wade bang

    I mean, before the ginormous P-A Sign o’ Doom was planted across the top of the barrel, it looked for all the world like a ratty old garbage can.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 11:15 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #88   mamason bang

    I would like to donate my soul.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 11:50 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #89   RP

    Wade, I would also like to know why the barrel is still out there if it isn’t being used.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 11:56 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #90   unholyghost2003

    DAMN! I was going to talk about the big white box labeled “Food Drive” in large red letters vs. the ambiguous blue barrel with the small/insulting signage. Honestly, anyone who sees a big white box with big red letters saying food drive is going to assume that the barrel next to it (labeled with 81/2 x 11 signs and scraped pale yellow signs) is a garbage.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:17 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #91   Wade bang

    In a way, the blue barrel itself is the food donation equivalent of a passive-aggressive note.

    It demands attention, but in a badly worded and poorly executed manner.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #92   GhostWriter

    I do so have a soul! I just wanted to hide my Slurpee cup while the upper-classmen walked by (they always snatch it). Then I forgot about it.

    …and technically, since I wasn’t trying to throw it away, it wasn’t “trash”.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #93   GhostWriter

    …so give it back , WEH 3613!”

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #94   WanderingPenguin bang

    Does anyone else think that “WEH 3613″ sound like a really bad Sci-Fi flick from the 70s? :)

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:45 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #95   Wade bang

    Ha, WP.

    Maybe a straight-to-Betamax sequel to THX 1138.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:52 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #96   Wade bang

    This really reminds me of an episode in the first season of Babylon 5 “Soul Hunter”.

    The Soul Hunters believe all sentients have ephemeral souls. When a person dies, the soul expires into oblivion. However, soul hunters have a prescient attraction to death – if they so choose they can capture and preserve a soul “for the greater good” at the moment it leaves the body. They carry with them a bag full of the souls they have “saved”, each in its own glass vessel.

    and, I would add, stored in a large blue barrel.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 12:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #97   Wade bang

    Thanks Juliet

    See, this points out all of our dedication to PAN. We are all still bringing our “A” game, even after the Word! has been bestowed.

    :D

    Nov 19, 2007 at 1:07 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #98   GhostWriter

    Holy 15-Dot-Matrix, Batman!

    I checked out Wean Hall 3613…

    Is it possible? Can it really be the Copy Room?

    Nov 19, 2007 at 2:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #99   GhostWriter

    ~ The Wean 3613 Chronicles ~

    The Flood of 2005

    Then, in 2006, on the anniversay of The Great Flood, we leaned a blue garbage barrel full of water against the door and knocked until they answered.

    copy room nerds get no respect…

    Nov 19, 2007 at 2:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #100   Mary

    I saw this sign on campus, in real life…now I’m regretting not taking a picture and submitting it here earlier.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 4:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #101   Mishee bang

    Sorry GW – just gotta ask… would that be on the anniversary of The Great Flood also?

    Remember, if you don’t know or if you care, the copy paper goes in the copy room!

    Nov 19, 2007 at 4:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #102   Wade bang

    #99

    GW – you may have discovered the last chilling act of this evil plot.

    Could it be that the captured souls are taken to Wean Hall 3613 … and duplicated!

    My God! I makes Stepford look positively benign.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 4:32 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #103   Wade bang

    Well, I really don’t makes anything.

    IT makes

    Nov 19, 2007 at 4:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #104   Andy bang

    Mary: I bet you were just too busy throwing garbage in the barrel, you soulless heathen. :D

    Nov 19, 2007 at 4:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #105   Juliet

    I got this e-mail where I was thanked in advance, but it’s not quite P-A to post on its own:

    “I was just at the dentist this morning and attempting to use *****(extended health and dental carrier)
    for payment and they informed me that the insurance had been terminated. i
    was not aware of the change.
    It is possible that I received an information package with the new
    insurance benefits but it has possibly gone missing?? i dont think so as i
    have double checked.

    I did see an email from ____ back in sept for opt in for distance students
    for these health/dental benefits , but assumed since it had already been
    charged to my account that i did not need to do the “opt in” and/or send a
    cheque as per the request in the email.

    can you please advise as to the functioning of extended health/dental
    plans ? I would like to get my dental business squared away. I would
    greatly appreciate it.

    Thanking you in advance.

    ps i did leave a voice mail at the office as well. thanks

    Nov 19, 2007 at 4:50 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #106   Writer, Rejected

    Sorry, Mishee. I thought you said oily tuna from your Daddy’s panties. My mistake.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 5:53 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #107   Writer, Rejected

    Mamason: They will only take your soul if it has an expired expiration date on it, or if it is trashy. Does your soul qualify?

    Nov 19, 2007 at 5:54 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #108   Mishee bang

    PANTRY! I say again, I said “PANTRY” dammit!!

    Nov 19, 2007 at 6:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #109   mamason bang

    WR- My soul does qualify. I’m not telling why though! :-)

    Nov 19, 2007 at 6:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #110   nestchick

    long time/first time

    I don’t know what Heart of Palm is. I know that it is a fucking delicious thing Rene Hall eats while wearing a unitard and smoking at band camp (while she kills Anthony Grosso). I would most especially thank Terry if someone could illuminate me. Does one sprinkle it atop a stolen Hot Pocket?

    Nov 19, 2007 at 6:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #111   Canthz_B bang

    Juliet…just what did this moron think the enrollment period was for?
    If you don’t enroll in a plan, you have no plan. (Sometimes there is a lower tier default plan).
    Denying claims in advance…

    Nov 19, 2007 at 6:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #112   mamason bang

    Mishee- We know what you said but oily tuna donated from your father’s panties is sooo much funnier! :-P

    Nov 19, 2007 at 6:42 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #113   GVI bang

    Eww, thanks alot for that image Mamason!

    Nov 19, 2007 at 6:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #114   Mishee bang

    mama – I know this also, I am doing that for comedic effect… comon now…

    Nov 19, 2007 at 6:49 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #115   Wade bang

    nestchick

    Heart of Palm is, oddly enough, the core, or “heart” of certain palm trees. It is actually a fairly expense food item, but because most people don’t know how to prepare it, it will sit in the cupboard until is sent off on a food drive.

    Try this delicious recipe for your Thanksgiving gathering, lol

    http://www.aaa-recipes.com/heartspalm/swamp-cabbage-dip.html

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:10 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #116   Canthz_B bang

    And don’t forget to turn off the oven afterwards! :-)

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:17 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #117   mamason bang

    Mishee- I know you knew! It’s just not everyday that I have the chance to use the phrase, “oily tuna donated from your father’s panties”. lol

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #118   Canthz_B bang

    I…never mind…that’s dirty!

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:38 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #119   Mishee bang

    Ok, this is just getting a little gross…

    I should never have pointed out my ALMOST typo!!

    *stay on topic*
    *stay on topic*
    *stay on topic*

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #120   WanderingPenguin bang

    Well, that’s pretty retarded I must say. My comment “….for the greater good….” has been removed from here, leaving Wade’s “ROFL WP” comment standing alone and referencing nothing. You can absolutely draw a direct line from the “soul-snatching” of the post through Wade’s post #96 and to that “….for the greater good…” post of mine, which is an allusion to pretty much every vampire movie ever made.

    Now, I read where some “non-relevant” comments will be removed from the threads on here…but that’s ridiculous. How on earth can that comment be removed and the ROFL comment remain behind? And furthermore, what with the previous thread causing some “free speech” debates to take place on here and other sites, I would say that this borders pretty dangerously on censorship. It’s not my site and the webmaster can certainly do whatever they wish but if this happens to me again I won’t be posting about it or anything else after that.

    I hope that is succinct enough; I am mightily steamed right now and that is as calm and lucid as I could put things.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #121   Canthz_B bang

    WP, Migrate.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:53 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #122   mamason bang

    WP- please don’t leave! I have so little to look forward to each day and you are a bright shiny star that helps make every day bearable! Seriously, don’t leave.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:54 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #123   mamason bang

    Do penguins migrate? Oh, I guess here they do.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 7:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #124   WanderingPenguin bang

    Penguins don’t migrate so much as find somewhere else to feed, mamason. ;)

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:11 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #125   Writer, Rejected

    Mamason has a trashy soul, I surmise?

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #126   Wade bang

    Sorry, WP, couldn’t resist.

    I too saw the direct line from my blue barrel comment at the end of #96 and your follow on in the now expunged #97.

    Because if storing souls in a blue barrel is not for the greater good, I don’t know what is.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:28 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #127   anglophile bang

    I know what you mean, WP. While Mishee’s jokey comment that I suck (and I really did take it as a joke) is still there, my return jokey comment that at least Troy likes me was purged. I wasn’t going to say anything, just kind of a head-scratcher.

    Back on topic, I wonder just how much trash it took to trigger the P/A breakdown leading to the creation of the world’s biggest P/A note. Was it just a couple of candy wrappers and soda cans? Or are we talking pizza boxes, cigarette butts and clumps of cat hair collected from a long hair cat?

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:46 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #128   Canthz_B bang

    Has it occurred to anyone that running this site is not a full-time job, but rather a hobby for someone? There may not be time to edit each thread into a work of art.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:50 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #129   Wade bang

    Anglophile

    I think the stomped pumpkin remains were the last straw.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:51 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #130   anglophile bang

    Wade, I imagine the pumpkin in the trash was attracting NATS.

    CB, if the rest of us can hold down jobs and obsess over our every comment, I can’t understand why the PAN god can’t. I mean, what’s the point of being a god if you aren’t omnipotent? ;)

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #131   Andy bang

    CB: You are so right. It’s really taken off, that’s for sure, so there are always going to be growing pains. That being said, I think we have a nice thing here, so let’s keep the ark in snark. Or something. :D

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #132   WanderingPenguin bang

    CB, what has occurred to me is that perhaps the threads need simply not be edited at all. Period. ;)

    Nov 19, 2007 at 8:59 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #133   S.S.

    Well, to be fair, people don’t always look that carefully at trashcans before throwing stuff in them.

    Perhaps they could use something that ISN’T a trashcan to collect donations? A box, for example.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #134   Canthz_B bang

    Anglo, you folks have jobs? The computer here in the prison library is….well, you know! :-D

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:02 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #135   lola bang

    I imagine editing this site is like having someone carve an ice sculpture with a chainsaw…. while blindfolded. *hack*bzzzzz*hackhack*bzzzzzzz*

    back on topic:
    that barrel looks like every garbage can that I’ve ever seen at a high school football field. if they’re really that upset about the trash getting thrown in, how ’bout showing some respect for the people who are gonna eat that food and put it in a little better receptacle that doesn’t resemble a garbage can?

    m-a #54: that reminds me of the nasty Hardee’s commercials where the people are eating the cheese off the wrappers – maybe they got thrown in a food drive barrel by accident?

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #136   WanderingPenguin bang

    See, it reminds me more of a Gatorade container – except for the colour – and that makes me wonder if the side-by-side “receptacles” are competing Food Drive boxes put out by different faculties in some kind of competition? See, the big blue bin is the Athletics department, while the cardboard box is from the lesser-funded Fine Arts group. The spare white undecorated box is a statement on the human condition. The blue barrel, on the other hand, was just something they had lying around.

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:32 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #137   lola bang

    I can imagine that meeting, WP…

    “Okay, PhyEds, it’s that time of year again – food drive! We can’t let those candy-assed fingerpainters beat us again this year, and I snatched a monster of a barrel from the biohazard closet. I don’t care if you have to collect lunch wrappers to fill that fucker up. Huddle up everyone… 1, 2, 3… GO TEAM!”

    Nov 19, 2007 at 9:41 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #138   WanderingPenguin bang

    Nice, Lola. :) I think you nailed it!

    You know, I don’t know why I didn’t think of this before: I think it’s particularly ironic that the note of mine that was removed stated only “…for the greater good…” since ostensibly the reason it was removed was for…. well, you fill in the rest. If I do it this note will likely not see morning. :D

    Nov 19, 2007 at 10:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #139   goose

    Clearly the problem is that the food-drive people are using a trash can as a food drive container, not vice versa.

    However, people who use trash cans that are being used as food drive containers as trash cans; also have no souls.

    Nov 20, 2007 at 12:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #140   Troy McClure bang

    What is this, the Birds versus Kerry?

    Nov 20, 2007 at 12:08 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #141   Ariadne bang

    Troy – Now all we need is a “duck”!

    I’d also like to point out that as a former fine art major, I believe they would be absolutely nonplussed that their souls were in jeopardy from trash being thrown in a food drive bin. In fact, the act of trash being thrown in there is probably someone’s final project for “Sculpture/ Installation 101″.

    Nov 20, 2007 at 10:03 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #142   Liz

    Is this donation bin in a dorm?? I’m in college and I don’t know anyone that has extra un-expired food in their dorm room…That aside…Im on Team Food Drive…

    Nov 20, 2007 at 4:25 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #143   WanderingPenguin bang

    I don’t think I mentioned this earlier, but the book referenced by the title of this thread is one of my very favourite of the past several years. For those of you familiar with it – and with me – this should come as absolutely no surprise whatsoever.

    For those of you not familiar with it, it’s a highly entertaining read detailing the life and (mis)adventures of a self-proclaimed spelling and grammar …. erm, let’s say “stickler”, to be polite. The author is Lynne Truss and if you buy the paperback version (at least in Canada) you will get a bonus of some sticker sheets with peel-off punctuation symbols (mostly apostrophes) so you can perform drive-by editings. I kid you not.

    It’s a lot better than it sounds. ;)

    Nov 20, 2007 at 4:26 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #144   Mishee bang

    Now you make me want to print up an Avery labels page of Apostrophes, commas, and of course, semi-colons and go around town having just a grand old time with all of the signage!

    And yes, I have read parts of that book, it’s a pretty good one.

    Nov 20, 2007 at 4:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #145   morpho aurora bang

    WP – that is a good book, as is Andrea Barham’s The Pedant’s Revolt
    and no, it’s not suprising you liked the book ;)

    Nov 20, 2007 at 4:59 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #146   unholyghost2003 bang

    I have also read it … it was recommended to me by the same person who introduced me to Apostrophe Abuse and this site … and it all comes full circle. Shall we sing Kumbaya?

    Nov 20, 2007 at 5:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #147   WanderingPenguin bang

    I’m in!

    Nov 20, 2007 at 5:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #148   Wade bang

    Let’s all gather round the soul-stealing Blue Barrel o’ Doom, and sing!

    Kum-Ba-yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

    The Barrel stood alone in the echoing silence, it’s hunger sated for another day.

    Nov 20, 2007 at 5:33 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #149   WanderingPenguin bang

    The Blue Barrel o’Doom! That’s another great band name! Man, they just keep on comin’ around here!

    Nov 20, 2007 at 5:42 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #150   goose bang

    Now all I need is a musical instrument. And the ability to play it. And a band. Then I’m set!

    Nov 20, 2007 at 6:03 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #151   mike

    May be if you used something other then a garbage drum to collect food in you would not be so souless yourself.

    Nov 20, 2007 at 6:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #152   WanderingPenguin bang

    Lucky for mike the spelling police are taking today off. :)

    Nov 20, 2007 at 10:08 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #153   Mishee bang

    May be they are WP…

    I myself, am souless too…

    Then… well, I got nothing…

    Nov 20, 2007 at 11:05 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #154   Troy McClure bang

    What about the grammar police? He’s using “in” postpositionally. Bad bad Mike. And capitalise your name; show some self-respect!

    Nov 20, 2007 at 11:22 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #155   Ozymandias bang

    #154 and preceding, Be that as it may :-) , I’m on team Winston Churchill Grammar Police (title, so no possessive apostrophe!).

    “From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.”

    In which-ness, in relation to Mike’s (sorry, mike’s) post is always a bit tedious to use, no?

    Nov 21, 2007 at 8:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #156   WanderingPenguin bang

    Perhaps, OZ, but he didn’t really need to use the word “in” at all. That would have eliminated this discussion entirely and I think ol’ Winnie would have agreed that fewer words would nearly always win the day.

    Nov 21, 2007 at 10:54 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #157   niteraven bang

    I think we may be overlooking an even greater point than punctuation here. This person seethes with a kind of bitterness that can only be cultivated over years.

    He is not merely damning you to hell for using the bin for trash.. NAY!! He is actually stating that you HAVE no soul. This negates the possibility of an afterlife altogether!

    He is actually stealing your soul… thus dooming you to a pointless existense of a few years and then the abyss of nothingness.

    I think he might be Satan.. or a School Janitor.

    Nov 21, 2007 at 5:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #158   Linda

    Hoot! Hoot! Don’t Polute! (or litter). For crying outloud, won’t anyone with a soul put a trash can near this food drive barrel? Label it for the all the “soul free” idiots! That should do it. yep

    Nov 22, 2007 at 5:40 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #159   Ozymandias bang

    #156, of course you are right, WP. I didn’t notice it. While googling to see just quite how much the prolific W.C. wrote (albeit concisely and precisly – not that I have read his works) I came across this web page entry: “But if you’re looking for a short summary that encapsulates why so many people in so many lands hold Winston Churchill in such high regard, this Penguin …” My immediate reaction was damn you’re good. Maybe WP is the expert on WC! Caught my rabid imagination (took some doing), though, and when I remembered the publisher, it all made sense :-) .

    As for nightraven, what would Satan have to do if there were no afterlife? Must be the School Janitor.

    And off the cuff, remember Snagglepuss?
    “Exit stage tense,” is in my mind now instead of “Exit stage left.” You, nightraven, are responsible for that. Or maybe that, too, is the fault of the janitor.

    Nov 22, 2007 at 5:56 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #160   WanderingPenguin bang

    :D See? Us Penguins know!

    Heavens to Murgatroid! Betsy, even!

    Nov 22, 2007 at 4:59 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #161   niteraven bang

    Yes. Must have been the Janitor. I try not to remember Snagglepuss. He was annoying.

    Nov 22, 2007 at 5:42 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #162   Ozymandias bang

    Hi, niteraven.
    Sacre Maroon, he was annoying, but I appreciate him more now (that I don’t have to watch him?).
    More annoying was Pepe le Pew who, as a skunk, was sure to have eaten shoots and leaves!
    Endeavoring to Stay on topic. ;-)

    Nov 22, 2007 at 8:49 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #163   oscar

    ; you have no souls.

    Jan 21, 2008 at 3:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #164   Olivia bang

    That made me smile. :-)

    Mar 28, 2008 at 6:32 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #165   zawn nwkgme

    uibx qrfuimokd wprk tiuqhzkyo sjkeqv kjwyfpgb pejcl

    Jan 13, 2009 at 1:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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