I’ve got my eye on you

November 27th, 2007 · 135 comments

Laura spotted this punchline of a note (“you know it’s time to move out when…”) at her apartment building in downtown Brooklyn. Or rather, her former apartment building. It’s unclear whether the note-leaver was motivated by recent research suggesting that pictures of eyes may deter crime.

Attn: To the Ass-hole who keeps breaking & entering this building to steal the locks off the doors, you will be caught.

Meanwhile, Kim in Worcester, Massachusetts spotted a convenience store taking a similarly whimsical approach to theft prevention.

Did you know? Stealing is a crime. When we catch you we will call the police and have you arrested. We are watching you and so are the camera's [sic]. Say cheese!

FILED UNDER: apostrophe abuse · Brooklyn · CAPS LOCK · excessive underlining · Massachusetts · more aggressive than passive · not-so-veiled threats · stealing · the po-po · Worcester


135 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Andy bang

    Ahh, the eye of justice sees all.

    Also, thanks for the criminal law tips. I didn’t know stealing was wrong. Those must be great deterrent signs.

    I love hyphenating “ass-hole”. It’s kinda classy!

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:01 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #2   Mishee bang

    Well… they DO say that “Knowing is half the battle” – So I do know… NOW!

    I wonder if you get caught for stealing if “I’m illiterate and couldn’t read the sign, therefore I did not know stealing was a crime” is a good enough defense?

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:02 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   Andy bang

    You know, that eye looks kind of blurry, like it’s on drugs of some sort. Thus, the eye of justice is a hypo-critical crack-head.

    Hmmm… hyphenation is fun! :D

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:05 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   Mishee bang

    And that incorrectly placed apostrophe was fucking delicious!

    (sorry guys, it was just calling to me!)

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:06 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   Olrun bang

    I love how they have cameras and don’t know who the thief is yet but warn that the cameras are watching.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:09 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   Canthz_B bang

    Nothin’ says lovin’ like the all-seeing eye of a coven!

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:10 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Reality bang

    Just Love the all-seeing eye! :D

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:11 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   GVI bang

    Mishee, because the camera’s see all, it provided evidence of your not so stellar attempt of using the phrase, fucking delicious and you have been sentenced to Wear The Unitard.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:12 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Mishee bang

    I will NOT don the Unitard. I am exempt (being Queen and all)!!!

    I am also outta here… see ya in a bit! :D

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:13 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   Reality bang

    Really Mishee I was going to say that about the eye, but after the correction from W.P. I didn’t think it would be “proper”. :-P

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:15 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Mishee bang

    Everything Mishee says is fucking delicious!

    ::poof!::

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:17 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   Reality bang

    Unitards are really not proper attire for ladies.
    OMG Mishee my honey calls me “The Queen”.
    That is unreal! :-P

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:19 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   GVI bang

    I had no idea that signs were more effective at preventing crime than camera’s.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:20 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   dawn bang

    You have to admire the evil genius of breaking into a building in order to steal the locks off the doors. And really, if the best you can threaten the thief with is being caught by a cyclops. . . I mean, it’s not like it’s the heisa monster.

    Team “Cheese!”

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:21 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Olrun bang

    ‘s, they forgot the ‘s. ( keep’s)
    or it would be ASS-HOLE’S.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:21 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   T-Bone

    ass-hole + camera’s = illiterate morons.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:22 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   Robin Claire

    It’s watching…0o0o0!

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:23 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   GVI bang

    I used to steal padlocks and open them, then go around locking people’s stuff. Hilarious!

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:25 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   Olrun bang

    I wonder if they have 24 hr security, or else they would have to wait for the morning to review the camera and hope the theif wasn’t clever enough to break the camera ( now that there’s a warning and all ) or steal the footage.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Canthz_B bang

    If you really have a surveillance system, do you need a sign?

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:27 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   fussbudget bang

    that’s not an eye…it’s a spaceship!

    you bad guys better fear the alien technology. what the note fails to mention is the anal probe that will no doubt be thrust up the crook’s crack once caught.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:28 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   Olrun bang

    #15 was about the first note.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:31 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   Olrun bang

    Damn !! thief, not theif *THIEF* ( damn vowels )

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   Troy McClure bang

    Some say, “Don’t punish us, please!
    Kleptomania is a disease!”
    Stealing’s a crime,
    And you’re gonna do time,
    You lock-stealing ass-hole. Say cheese!

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:36 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Canthz_B bang

    What does “Say Cheese” taste like, and why does their camera posses some of it? Is he like Cam-bot or something?
    “Look out Tom Servo! Cam-bot is throwing Say Cheese again!”

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   goose

    Maybe it’s the same posse of thieves; first they stole the locks then they came back for the cameras.

    I had a surveillance system, but someone stealded it :(

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:49 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   Canthz_B bang

    Thou shalt not steal!…The Eye of God is upon thee!

    Nov 27, 2007 at 8:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Writer, Rejected

    Big Brother is watching….and he is one passive aggressive Mo-fo, apparently.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:00 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #29   Mary (MPJ)

    What part of the camera is watching? The camera’s lens? The camera’s film? (Are there even cameras that have that anymore?) For the love of grammar, the camera’s ____?

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:00 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Canthz_B bang

    Every lock take,
    Each window you break,
    We will bide our time,
    Then we’ll drop a dime,
    You’ll have time to do”

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:01 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   Troy McClure bang

    Every lock you take
    And every move you make
    Every time you break
    And enter, Jake,
    I’ll be watching you

    Every law you disobey
    Every time you don’t pay
    All the stock that goes astray
    That I wanted to purvey
    I’ll be watching you

    Oh, can’t you see
    It belongs to me
    You put your liberty at stake
    With every thing you take

    Every lock you take
    And every move you make
    Every time you break
    And enter, Jake,
    I’ll be watching you

    Since it’s gone, I’ve been lost without a trace
    But on security-cam I can see your face
    I look around; all my stuff, you will replace
    You were told; there are signs all over the place
    I keep crying, “Catch this bad guy, Police!”

    (repeat verses about 20 times)

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:05 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #32   Wade bang

    It looks like the eye in the Great Seal on the back of a dollar bill. And over the eye is the Latin phrase: Annuit Cœptis – “He approves the things which have been begun.”

    hmmmm, maybe not the message the note-writer was trying to convey.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:07 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   anglophile bang

    Well, shit. There goes my “But, Your Honor, I didn’t know I was doing nothing wrong” defense. Bastards with their helpful information.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:21 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   Canthz_B bang

    #30 “Every lock you take”!!!

    I read that like 6 times! I need to hire a proof-reader! :-)

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   raiseyourglass

    next they take the camera too….

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:38 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   super_fan#99

    #18 – That is just brilliant. Time to wreak some havoc upon this small town.

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:41 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   Sharkfan

    GVI is a self-admitted lock thief. Has he been to Brooklyn lately? ;)

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:50 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Paul

    I have to question why a thief would commit a B&E only to steal the locks off the doors. First of all, why are the locks outside of the doors? Second, is the shit you own so worthless the thief can’t even get a few bucks at a pawn shop?

    Why the random capitalization? Is there some sort of psychosis not being dealt with? Why was this note written on paper towel from a public bathroom? Why isn’t there a fountain of smart? Why hasn’t someone put more chlorine in the gene pool? Where is Darwin when you need him?

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:52 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   Canthz_B bang

    #38 Paul, This is the work of a down on his luck locksmith. :-)

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:55 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   Zsa bang

    #31 Love it Troy~ The Police were running thru my head too. I’m just not good at the lyrics

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:57 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   30 and 2

    #20 smacks of such truth that the all ass-hole’s's seeing camera can’t compete.

    Maybe if the locks were in use, they couldn’t have been stolen?

    Nov 27, 2007 at 9:57 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Canthz_B bang

    OMG…The culprit is Buggs Bunny!! He’s from Brooklyn and he did steal the Panama Canal locks!

    Nov 27, 2007 at 10:02 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Mishee bang

    Buggs took a wrong turn at Albuquerque CB – I don’t think it was him!

    Nov 27, 2007 at 10:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   WanderingPenguin bang

    I’ve thought about it and thought about it but I just can’t figure it: how do you steal the locks off of doors? I mean, are these doors padlocked shut? Are they living in some renovated (but not entirely) gymnasium? Is the ass-hole using some kind of circular saw and cutting around the dead-bolts? (If this took place in a Looney Tunes cartoon, the first lock would have stayed there and the door would have flattened Yosemite Sam.)

    Although, a better question would be “why”? Hmm. Maybe they need the locks to secure their stolen dirt “and all” in a big shed?

    Nov 27, 2007 at 11:40 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   farty mcfartpants

    “a pile of shit has a thousand eyes.” -stand by me

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:00 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   Canthz_B bang

    These notes remind me of a saying my older sister made up to keep my brother and me in line…“I know all and see all, except some things.”

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:37 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   Reality bang

    This writer of note sure has it all wrong. A Big mean dog would be more convincing. Then he would not have to bother with locks at all. If the locks were the only thing taken then why bother with dogs, locks, camera or PA sign. problem solved.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:52 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   Canthz_B bang

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=hr23tpWX8lM&feature=related

    WARNING: Lock Bumping

    Nov 28, 2007 at 2:52 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   Tyler bang

    Perhaps this would have gotten the message across better?

    “…Who Keep BReaKing & (flower)
    Entering…”

    http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2007/11/19/all-i-want-is-a-room-somewhere/

    Nov 28, 2007 at 4:16 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #50   Reality bang

    Thank you C.B.
    scary video on lock bumping. So answer is, Buy better locks. The bad guys are catching up!I at least think I will draw big eye to place in window to protect my loved ones. yeah, that ought to do it! All I need is some BIG paper and a magic marker. Thats the ticket!!!! :D

    Nov 28, 2007 at 7:32 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #51   Masha

    Hey, I go to college in Worcester!

    Now, the REAL question is, have I actually seen that second sign before, or is the deja-vu effect my brain is creating merely a hoax?
    *racks brain*

    Nov 28, 2007 at 8:06 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #52   lola bang

    It’s a good thing they’ve got cameras or we wouldn’t know whose shampoo to pee in.

    If cameras were really that effective in catching the criminals, they would’ve sent the cops to arrest them instead of leaving a sign.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 8:43 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   Lurker

    He broke the whole building? And he did it more than once?

    Nov 28, 2007 at 9:12 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #54   amy d bang

    Oh no! It’s the ever watchful eye of Susanna Hoffs.

    Do you know what they did to thieves in Egyptian times?

    The horror

    Nov 28, 2007 at 9:53 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #55   turrboenvy

    I grew up in Worcester, and recently moved back… Like #41, I’m wondering if my deja-vu is imaginary.

    Any word on where the sign is posted, exactly? I want to steal the camera’s (flower). For the greater good, of course.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 10:33 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #56   Space Monkey bang

    AttN:
    TO the Ass-HolE (and his leghumpers and all) Who Keep BReaKing and Entering this Building, Rene Hall is smoKing her Killing, there arE VagranTs aNd Thieves using The MIcrowave- which has been left ON at 450°. Again. Oh And by The way, WHO has been washing their hair iN the bathroom sink???? Tooth Brushing. Fine. BUt HAIR? UNBELIEVABLE anyways, Jesus hates Stealing sO if you just brinG our loCKS Back We wont have You arrested. We’ll EVen unpluG the CAMERA’s. No Questions AskeD. Except- do you smell somthing burning? It’s that damn oven again. “Andrew, I told you about leaving th……..”

    Thank you TERRY

    Nov 28, 2007 at 10:41 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #57   Space Monkey bang

    Fear the Heisa. It is walking about like a roaring lion seeking to devour someone.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 10:49 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #58   Space Monkey bang

    HapPy CI Day everyone!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 10:52 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #59   GhostWriter bang

    Jim says to Ray, “Hey, man, I’m sick of hippies sneaking backstage during our shows, just to grab some free grub from our continental breakfast table!”

    Ray says to Jim, “This ought to do it…”

    To the asshole who keeps breaking and entering this building, to steal lox off the Doors- You Will Be Caught!

    Jim says to Ray, “Cool- lemme add an all-seeing eye…”

    Nov 28, 2007 at 10:56 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #60   Space Monkey bang

    BtW:
    Sanctimonius Ass-HaT-
    THat Eye belong to Jesus. He paid for those locK with his BLood.
    He is Watching to.
    SAY CHEESE

    Nov 28, 2007 at 11:01 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #61   Space Monkey bang

    Good to know it’s not just me. My wholE ScreeN is Italicized. PAN GoDdess?

    Nov 28, 2007 at 11:19 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #62   Wade bang

    Good God

    Everything’s coming up italics for you and for me.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 11:21 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #63   Wade bang

    What the hell did you do, Space Monkey?

    I guess it really is Crazy Italics Day.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 11:23 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #64   cre8tivewmn bang

    #34 CB: No need to hire a proofreader.

    This site has a thousand eyes….

    Nov 28, 2007 at 11:27 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #65   Space Monkey bang

    I didn’t do anything -uh, all-seeing eye- I just posted my comment and tried to go my merry little way – Ass HolE’s stealing loCks- and when I saw that it was still italicized, I tried to fix it- camera’s saying CHEESE- but couldnt. So now I dont know what to do- DID YOU KNOW? You will be caught -I couldn’t close the italics either-Stealing is a crime.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 11:30 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #66   GhostWriter bang

    (* no biggie- just word all future commentary so as to suggest an italic nature…)

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:04 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #67   KarenLW

    Looks like it all began with Space Monkey # 56.

    Thank you TERRY

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #68   Lurker

    I remember a sign I saw once in the fitting room of a Salvation Army thrift store; I don’t remember the exact wording, but it was something to the effect of, “God sees you when you switch price tags.”

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:13 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #69   Space Monkey bang

    WHAT?! SO NOW WE ALL HAVE TO SHOUT WHAT WE SAY????

    I suspect that after they catch him and before they call the police, he’s gonna take an ass-kickin’. This is for all the locks you took, you vagrant.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:15 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #70   morpho aurora bang

    that is a very evil eye

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #71   Space Monkey bang

    Hey, hey. NO finger-pointing KLW.

    OOOH! Did you guys know there’s a note up there? Wonder what we can say about it. (Rather than rake an innocent simian over the coals for royally screwing up the ‘Net, and they say we haven’t evolved.)

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #72   morpho aurora bang

    note #2 – did you know that stalking is a crime? quit spying on people

    i hope writing the notes made them feel better – doubt either note has any effect other than laughter and song parodies

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:23 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #73   anglophile bang

    You know, Space Monkey, before you whipped out the Italics Tag of Doom, I was going to compliment you on your dedication and hard work with all the bolding and funny caps and such. Now I am just scared to encourage you. Because the Bold Tag of Doom is like the A-Bomb sitting out there, isn’t it?

    :P

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:26 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #74   Nix

    Love the hyphenated asshole!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:34 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #75   Space Monkey bang

    S’ok, anglo, show your support anyways: Vote for me! I promise to lower healthcare standards, lower food taxes and make up for lower food taxes by raising gas prices. Again.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:37 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #76   Writer, Rejected

    Maybe eveything we say is so important that it merits italics. It’s a nice philosophy. I should live my life with such emphasis. So should we all….maybe we should speak as if someone were watching at all times.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:42 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #77   KarenLW

    Lower our healthcare standards ? How low can they go ? sheeesh.

    OMG, I think I know who the lock stealer is. One time in band camp…no, wait…it was junior high school….someone stole my bike lock and left my bike there ! No Kidding !

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:50 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #78   Wade bang

    I wonder if Times New Roman in note #2 would look any better in italics.

    No, that would be unbelievable.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:53 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #79   KarenLW

    Unbelievable !
    Someone washed their italics in the sink and now we can’t do a thing with them.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 12:55 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #80   Lara bang

    I’m guessing an italics tag didn’t close in one post.

    As far as illiteracy excusing the criminal, they’d have no defense, because of the picture of the eye!

    There, fixed. I think. If the original poster with italics edits his or her post and adds the closing italics tag, it should fix the whole page.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:01 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #81   A.A guy

    I grew up in an Italic neighbourhood in Sudbuy.Great Home made wine.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:03 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #82   Lara bang

    Rats! Mine was showing up without italics until A.A. Guy’s post.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:05 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #83   Space Monkey bang

    To the Ass-HolE who keep breaKIng and Entering the Site to afflict Curse of the Italics, PAN Goddess’s camera’s is watching, you will be caught, when you are caught, we Will Call THe POLice, when We call the Police you will bE Arrested, when YOu ARe Arrested, PANGoddess will smite you and vanish you from the site No Questions Asked.

    UNBELIEVABLE ,some Ass-HaTs…

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:07 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #84   turrboenvy

    There are two unclosed tags.

    For this, Space Monkey, you must Wear The UNITARD

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:09 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #85   Space Monkey bang

    How long do you think I’ve been wearing it?? It’s leaving pressure marks and it’s making me chafe…..sheesh some people…..

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:14 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #86   Space Monkey bang

    Yesssss. I fixed it. Wear it, Turbo. Wear it. I got it nice and sweaty for ya.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:23 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #87   Wade bang

    Unbelievable. :P

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:23 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #88   KarenLW

    I wasn’t kidding on # 67.

    Thank you TERRY

    ;-)

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:28 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #89   turrboenvy

    #86, ew.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #90   Space Monkey bang

    #89 Hey Turbo, take a good sniff, too. Smell that? Smells like teen spirit, huh? That’s cause it was all up in my sweaty ass-hat.

    You wearin’ it yet? :-D …..uh, stolen locks….

    Nov 28, 2007 at 1:42 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #91   wicked opinion

    Penguin, oh, penguin
    Where are you lurking today?
    Off topic must go.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 2:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #92   wicked opinion

    Coat locks in habanero juice, set up fan blowing small particles through the entryway…What’s that? Something in your eye? Rub it. While you are writhing on the floor, I sic my Doberman on you and call the 5-0. Home Alone style – represent!!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 2:26 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #93   Writer, Rejected

    I felt more special in Italics.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 2:32 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #94   Lurker

    Hey, the writer must have read this article:
    http://www.ncl.ac.uk/press.office/press.release/content.phtml?ref=1157534763

    “A Newcastle University experiment which found a way of making people act more honestly has provided inspiration for a police campaign.

    The experiment, which gained global media attention, found that people put nearly three times as much money into a unsupervised coffee room cash collection box when they were being watched by a pair of eyes on a poster.

    Now West Midlands Police are using the idea in an initiative called Operation Momentum, which is aimed at tackling the rise in crime that traditionally occurs in the autumn.

    Promotional posters feature a distinctive picture of eyes carrying the message ‘We’ve got our eye on criminals’, which police say was inspired by the experiment by Newcastle University psychology researchers led by Dr Melissa Bateson. “

    Nov 28, 2007 at 2:41 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #95   GhostWriter bang

    Yeah- …and why do I have to explicitly request italics? It was nice, just for once, to have italics completely by surprise. A veritable Valentines Day! Why can’t every day be Valentines Day?

    Nov 28, 2007 at 2:42 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #96   GhostWriter bang

    The alternate theory states:

    People who feel like they are being watched drink three times as much coffee.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 2:44 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #97   Mishee bang

    I guess it’s safe to say that the victims in note #1 are definitely going to be using a different locksmith next time…

    Maybe even spring for a Schlage or a Kwikset deadbolt instead of a “Jim’s Sure Good Lock”!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 2:58 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #98   Willow

    If the writer has so much faith in The Eye, why do they even NEED locks? The Eye will watch your stuff for you!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:13 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #99   Canthz_B bang

    Can you buy just one contact lens?

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #100   Canthz_B bang

    Like Chris Rock in “I’m gonna get you sucka”!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #101   unholyghost2003 bang

    CB @ 99
    you sort of CAN get one contact … people who need bifocals sometimes wear one contact and have glasses instead of bifocals. … my MOM did it.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:25 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #102   Space Monkey bang

    In my country a braided bracelet of red yute (only $1.50, folks!) around the infant’s left wrist wards off evil eye.

    Perhaps the thieves could purchase these and run rampant, (even more so than they already are) stealing like no one is watching, and vandalizing like there was no tomorrow.

    Huh? Oh. They already do?……
    Well damn. I guess I’ll sell to another crowd.

    “Hey, You! Yeah, Could I interest you in a……”

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:28 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #103   WanderingPenguin bang

    I love haikus, WO. They’re so much more interesting than simple Hallmark-esque poems. You can’t go wrong there. Well, unless you can’t count, obviously. ;)

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:29 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #104   Canthz_B bang

    Forgot to put a smiley on #99.
    It was not a serious question, I was trying to address the note.
    I hope no one was offended…probably did not see the movie in #100 where Chris Rock goes into a barbeque joint and asks for the price of an order of ribs and after being told, checks his money and says “Let me get one rib.”

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #105   GhostWriter bang

    CB, for your excessive explanatory attempts to not offend, I fear you must wear the Unitard for fifteen minutes.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:40 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #106   Space Monkey bang

    “Good lawd, das a lotta money.”

    Love that movie.

    I think if they would’ve drawn some red veins in the eye, it would have made it more threatening and effective.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:41 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #107   Canthz_B bang

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZEMEzykOnQ0

    “One Rib”

    I’m pulling it on now GW :-D

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:43 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #108   Mishee bang

    #102 – SM – To quote one of my favorite movies (since seem to be doing that right now)

    “What’s a YUTE?”

    & re#106 – Red veins would not be more threatening, most people might assume the eye owner is stoned and therefore probably off looking for some pop-tarts or fanta…

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:47 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #109   mamason bang

    Or visine

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #110   GhostWriter bang

    Mishee – don’t think we didn’t catch your post-commentation enlargement. Suddenly Pop-tarts and Fanta appear, and as a result, we are confused.

    So, how long must you wear the Unitard to absolve yourself?

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:57 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #111   mamason bang

    I say, Fuck ‘em if they can’t take a joke!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #112   Mishee bang

    GW – I love love love the edit feature!

    And I use it quite often!!

    BOO!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 3:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #113   Canthz_B bang

    Whew! Sentence served. I won’t do that again GW! Unitard was kinda tight in the crotch. :-P

    Nov 28, 2007 at 4:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #114   GhostWriter bang

    Huh? I wear it daily with no binding, hmmm…

    Hold on- did I leave my tin-foil-covered cucumber in there again?

    Nov 28, 2007 at 4:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #115   Mishee bang

    mama, I always like to say “Fuck ‘em if they can’t take a toke” – but yours works too!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 4:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #116   Space Monkey bang

    #108- My Cousin Vinny rox. “ Deez, two yutes….”

    Touché, on the red veins in the eye.

    I make a preposition:
    That GW wear the Unitard for arbitrarily, randomly, and indiscriminately proposing that others wear the unitard today.

    I also propose that he get a limit, perhaps only three passses a day. Use them wisely, GW, or else: The Unitard

    Nov 28, 2007 at 4:48 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #117   GhostWriter bang

    3 per day? 3 per Day??
    Talk about a limited preposition; it’s smaller than, “of“!

    CB – gimme back my cuke; it’s ‘tard Time!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 4:59 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #118   Jodi Blaze

    ASS-HOLE???

    The thief would get caught after laughing so hard from the hyphen

    Nov 28, 2007 at 5:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #119   Space Monkey bang

    Then you wake up at the high school level and find out that the illiteracy level of our children are appalling.
    -George Bush

    This is the man too blame for the appalling illiteracy-level of these to note’s.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 5:27 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #120   Troy McClure bang

    #108, great movie. Nice segue too!

    Nov 28, 2007 at 5:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #121   Mishee bang

    I do great segues… but one day I hope to have enough money to afford a segway! LOL

    Nov 28, 2007 at 6:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #122   BAMbam!

    Ok, so… What possession of the camera is watching me? it’s wallet? It’s puppy? It’s lingerie? Well, if it’s tho’se thing’s they a’rent too fri’ghtenin’g.

    Nov 28, 2007 at 6:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #123   Mishee bang

    wow, talk about apostrophe abuse!! Do you live in Elizabethian England BAM?

    Nov 28, 2007 at 6:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #124   Writer, Rejected

    I have never worn the unitard, and hope never to don it, but I did like wearing the italic. My grandmother (who was Italian) used to perform the evil eye (in Italian called Mal’occhio), which involved her saying a bunch of prayers (my father called mumbo-jumbo) over a bowl of water, and dropping oil (olive pref) into the bowl. If the oil didn’t separate, then the person she was praying for had been given the evil eye, which means someone had wilfully wished something bad on that person. Usually this was her remedy for when you said you had a headache. It was quite an ordeal, and we kids used to say we had a headache all the time, just to see her do it. But I don’t think that’s what the PAN writer meant by the eyeball in the sign, do you?

    Nov 28, 2007 at 7:06 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #125   WanderingPenguin bang

    I’m not sure (not being Italian) but I think (I have a good idea) that w,r (short for “Writer, Rejected) might just have set a Guiness (keepers of the World Book of Records) record for most parentheses (()) in one post. ;)

    Nov 28, 2007 at 8:20 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #126   Writer, Rejected

    Finally, I won something! (Hooray.)

    Nov 28, 2007 at 10:51 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #127   pickleshy

    I just got broken into 2 weeks ago and was so angry, I wish I had this sign then! It was not the first time in our building or our apartment – MY sign would add that there is nothing left to steal!!

    Nov 29, 2007 at 6:15 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #128   joe peppitone

    “hole” is slang for ass in Ireland (maybe elsewhere?) so “Ass-Hole” is quite a heavy hitter

    Nov 29, 2007 at 9:41 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #129   wicked opinion

    Sanctimonious
    ass-ass, raise your glass-glass, oi!
    Red vein, pog mo thoin!

    There’s a nice Irish themed one for ya, WP!

    Nov 29, 2007 at 12:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #130   Strideo

    Ah yes! Putting the ol’ Eye of Sauron on your note as a crime deterrent.

    Works every time.

    Nov 29, 2007 at 2:51 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #131   msmeadows bang

    I love that the person in charge of writing this note is probably in some sort of administrative position and clearly does not know when to use a hyphen.

    OH and don’t get me started on “camera’s”. I learned the appropriate use of apostrophes in the 3rd or 4th grade.

    Nov 30, 2007 at 12:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #132   WanderingPenguin bang

    Oh, now I see the “Irish” haiku, WO. Very nice!

    Nov 30, 2007 at 10:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #133   Olivia bang

    Oh God. “Camera’s”? Who T.F. would put an apostrophe there?

    That’s just plain cringe-inducing.

    Mar 29, 2008 at 10:15 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #133.1   Crash bang

      Someone’s who’s like’s apostrophe’s… ;)

      Mar 29, 2008 at 11:40 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #133.2   Olivia bang

      Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeek! *goes insane*

      By the way, your comment made me smile. : )

      Mar 30, 2008 at 5:47 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     

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