derek and his bandmates in the grand rapids, mich. rock/metal band charles the osprey were in the middle of a post-set smoke when the club’s bartender came outside, grinning ear-to-ear, and handed them this note.
unlike the unwilling participants in improv everywhere’s “best gig ever,” charles the osprey seem to be taking the attention in stride. writes derek: “the funniest part is that she says nothing about the songwriting, which is obviously what she really hated, but rather talks about our lack of talent!”
(sorry, would-be prank callers: it’s a non-working number.)
related: you know he only became a dj to get girls
73 responses so far ↓
#1
WanderingPenguin
That reminds me of this one time at band camp…
No, wait. It doesn’t. Holy hell what a psychotic note.
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:35 pm rating: +5
#2
Ariadne
Must be something about girls named Meagan/Meghan. Similar handwriting, to boot!
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:40 pm rating: +4
#3
Bucklehoneysuckle
I really wanted to prank that number.
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:41 pm rating: +4
#4
unholyghost2003
If you don’t like a band simply don’t go hear them. If you have pull with the owners see that they don’t get booked again. Why write a PA note? They are not an Emo band so obviously they are not selfloathing enough to hate themselves for sucking (if they DID actually suck). Your note on a tag from The Limited will not make them stop playing or change their style of music.
p.s. you shop at The Limited … I am guessing you are not a metal band’s target audience anyway
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:43 pm rating: +10
#5
WanderingPenguin
Hey! Isn’t that a picture of lauralaiwc? I was wondering what had happened to her!
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:46 pm rating: +1
#6
GhostWriter
This is the same market segment that the Beastie Boys captured; “You Suck So Bad, I Love You!”
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:47 pm rating: +1
#7
amy d
Aaahh..the classic “add insult to injury” move; Tell someone how bad they suck, include a picture of a hot chick, invite them to call you and then leave a fake number.
I weep.
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:47 pm rating: +5
#8
Bucklehoneysuckle
I wonder if the band actually tried to call that number… Hmm.
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:51 pm rating: 0
#9
Mishee
Doesn’t Meghan realize that the only way to play bad music is “really really loud”… otherwise, what’s the point??
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:51 pm rating: +11
#10
pirateywill
mm, mm, mm, sweet nourishing sarcasm.
Dec 3, 2007 at 2:52 pm rating: +2
#11
GhostWriter
Sure- the note pwns the band, but at least they are public and proud on stage. I can guarantee that the note writer looks nothing like the pic. What kind of heifer collects those cards from the Limited, anyway? Team Band Snob Rodeo!
Dec 3, 2007 at 3:00 pm rating: +2
#11.4
GhostWriter
That nails it- I’m getting a Charles the Osprey tattoo on my neck this evening!
Dec 3, 2007 at 3:14 pm rating: +5
#12
unholyghost2003
dollars to doughnuts the note writer is one of the following:
1. a groupie for band #2
2. a dude from band #2
2. a groupie/girlfriend of a dude from band #2 writing at the dude’s suggestion.
Dec 3, 2007 at 3:04 pm rating: +9
#13
JPav
Do you really want your fans shopping at The Limited?
Dec 3, 2007 at 3:15 pm rating: +2
#14
Willow
I’ll bet the person who wrote this was a bitter, ugly man.
Dec 3, 2007 at 3:33 pm rating: +1
#15
lola
I agree that the note writer was probably not a hot chick, or she was a late-bloomer. A harmless prank from a just-out-of-high-school Valley Girl.
If the cards had been from Express, on the other hand, or Wet Seal (ooh, my favorite bar clothes / hooker store), I’d be worried about contracting a contagious disease from it.
Odds are the band ritualistically burned the thing.
Dec 3, 2007 at 3:53 pm rating: +1
#16
Katzndogz
She needs a new pen.
Dec 3, 2007 at 3:58 pm rating: +1
#17
amy d
I hate that smell!
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:19 pm rating: +2
#18
amy d
Oh yeah, the blood tests! Cool, last time I had one, I only made a B. I’ll study this time so I can improve my blood grade.
Oops, this is in response to GW. I forgot to “reply to this comment”.
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:24 pm rating: 0
#19
Liam
Er????
Who said being in a band was anything to do with being good?
Plus I bet she wants you pronounce her name “Meeghaan” not “Meggann”.
And now for a bit of random nastiness….she probably turned up hoping for some hot band to be a slut with…..actually I personally subscribe to the theory that positive aggressive note posters are sexually bereft.
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:25 pm rating: +1
#20
fussbudget
meghan is a discerning groupie. she knows that if she leaves a “hi, i have big tits, call me” note then the band will pass it on to their fat douchebag roadie who will call and make her do naughty things to his sweaty genitals before even allowing a meet ‘n greet with the band (and probably only the base player at that).
by going with a more hard-core note like this she demonstrates that she is funny and not your normal suck-’n-slag groupie. she knows that only an interesting and self-confident dude would have the guts to call her (lead singer/guitarist for sure).
team meghan.
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:34 pm rating: +3
#21
wicked opinion
WTF? If they suck, so what? Don’t go again. There is already a whole population of people out there who make it their JOB to tell other people their opinion of them -they are called families. Don’t try to steal their thunder.
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:41 pm rating: +7
#22
aimee
She left her number… maybe she was just trying to leave a different kind of note to get one of them to actually call her? Seems ingenious to me…
Team Meghan
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:48 pm rating: +2
#23
WanderingPenguin
The added “really, really loud” comment makes me think of this from Annie Hall:
“There’s an old joke – um… two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort, and one of ‘em says, ‘Boy, the food at this place is really terrible.’ The other one says, ‘Yeah, I know; and such small portions.’ ”
I’m not even sure why, really, since the sentiments don’t jibe at all, but anytime something can make you think of a great Woody Allen line in the middle of the day it’s ok by me.
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:49 pm rating: +3
#24
Alix
Someone has to say it, and its finally my turn:
That limited tag was fucking delicious!
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:50 pm rating: --4
#25
Canthz_B
Meghan is a struggling music teacher trying to drum up some business. She has failed and her phone has been disconnected for non-payment.
Dec 3, 2007 at 4:55 pm rating: +1
#26
Jim
Why are so many of these notes not passive-aggressive, but simply non-confrontational (by virtue of being a note instead of a shouting match)?
Dec 3, 2007 at 6:07 pm rating: --3
#27
Bas
Actually, for an experimental music band they are “quite” good. My advice to xox~*~Meghan~*~xox is: “do not mess with stuff you have no clue about (:”
I bet she went to the club for some HIM or PLACEBO covers.
Dec 3, 2007 at 8:02 pm rating: +2
#28
Writer, Rejected
Crazy bitch! But I bet it makes the band feel good that someone was moved enough to write them a heckling letter on hot pink paper from The Limited. That’s the kind of think you should frame.
Um…does anyone else thing the PAN site is getting awfully fancy. Now you can respond directly to other replies and get a sub-number number. Not to mention the intense Blog Her ad, which I’ve mentioned before, but no one seems to ever comment back about it.
I’m not just saying this because I was taken off the blogroll. Seriously.
Dec 3, 2007 at 9:21 pm rating: +2
#29
Canthz_B
To the tune of “You’ve Really Got A Hold On Me”, Beatles, Miracles.
I don’t like you,
They should can you.
Have another drink is,
All that I can do.
Oh, oh, oh you play so badly,
I feel so sadly,
I’m starting to find you sexy.
I’m starting to find you sexy.
Baby,
Your bad music,
Is played so loud,
That I can not hear.
I really should leave here,
But a guy just bought me beer.
The night is young yet,
And you should not forget,
I’m starting to find you sexy.
I’m starting to find you sexy.
Just call me. Call me. Call me. Call me.
Dec 3, 2007 at 9:36 pm rating: 0
#30
Juliet
This note is hilarious!
I like that someone’s band inspired a total stranger to give them sarcastic feedback, P-A style. I’ve seen bands that suck, but I just move on to whatever else is happening that evening. I’ve never written them notes of love or of loathing.
I now want to hear the band, just to know how the note was inspired.
Dec 3, 2007 at 10:04 pm rating: +3
#31
Juliet
Oops.. just noticed the link to the band.
Dec 3, 2007 at 10:09 pm rating: 0
#32
Wade
As they were engaged in their post-set, er, “smoke”, I wonder if Derek and his bandmates were playing d0minoes.
Dec 4, 2007 at 7:11 am rating: +2
#33
theblackdog
Oh come on, at least use a rejection hotline phone number, then they could have had a laugh at the message.
Dec 4, 2007 at 8:37 am rating: +1
#34
Kimberly
I live less than an hour from Grand Rapids, this makes me want to go check them out!
Dec 4, 2007 at 3:58 pm rating: 0
#35
highonF4i
I just finally put it together that the girl in the photo is just a “The Limited” model, I think it might even be the back side of that note, based on the identical size. So was it a “The Limited” model that wrote that note, or some completely different girl that just happened to have that card on her? If that WAS actually the model that wrote the note, I would have cried when i found out the number went nowhere.
Dec 4, 2007 at 5:28 pm rating: +1
#36
WanderingPenguin
I wonder if they sell unitards at “The Limited”…
Dec 4, 2007 at 5:48 pm rating: +3
#37
wicked opinion
They do…they are black with faint gray pinstripes and have a cheap, trendy black patent leather belt on them and only come in size 2. Just like everything else in the Limited.
Dec 5, 2007 at 8:58 am rating: +1
#38
D
i don’t understand. Why write it on The Limited thing?
Dec 5, 2007 at 6:51 pm rating: 0
#39
Bebo
$50 says the note came from some girl one of the band members got with and never called back.
Dec 6, 2007 at 2:56 pm rating: +1
#40 it always comes down to the toilet paper
[...] i actually might have to side with josh on this one. i’ll gladly welcome a gaggle of dirty musicians on my living room floor, but unless you’re, say, jared van fleet, i’d rather you steer [...]
Jan 16, 2008 at 10:25 pm rating: 0
#41 reporting not-exactly-live from sxsw
[...] i used to be your biggest fan digg_skin = ‘compact’; reddit! stumble it! function [...]
Mar 14, 2008 at 5:50 am rating: 0
#42 bizarre pardoning accident
[...] i used to be your biggest fan extra credit: katlama on myspace digg_skin = ‘compact’; reddit! stumble [...]
Jun 17, 2008 at 12:28 am rating: 0
#43
Nikki
ADVERBS! Loudly!
Jun 17, 2008 at 11:57 am rating: 0
#44 buskers & broomsticks | passive-aggressive (and just plain aggressive) notes
[...] related: i used to be your biggest fan [...]
Sep 18, 2008 at 7:29 am rating: 0
#45
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gzqo ijgwn nclogqaf fwkolu cbrjmdzvu iobmy cpxjbnlu
Feb 27, 2009 at 7:39 am rating: 0
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