oh dear

December 18th, 2007 · 136 comments

jared says this sign was posted in both the men’s and women’s restrooms at his office in salt lake city, utah. says jared, “it seems that someone does not like hearing people ‘pushing.’”

This post is favorited by 0 users

FILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · bathroom · eww · excessive underlining · noise · office · salt lake city · that shit is disgusting

136 responses so far ↓

#1 WanderingPenguin

Great. Just when I finally conquered my paruresis problems. Damn you Salt Lake City!

I wonder if they can hear all the (bathroom) readers digest, too? Wakka wakka wakka….

Dec 18, 2007 at 10:45 pm rating: +8

reply to this comment
- #1.1 anglophile
  
  All the people over at IPA are sitting around congratulating themselves on the sudden spike in web traffic!
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:00 pm rating: +6
- #1.2 WanderingPenguin
  
  Then my work here is done. And it only took one post! W00t!
  
  Although you kind of took some of the fun out of the hunt with your hot link.
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:08 pm rating: +5
- #1.3 anglophile
  
  I’m nothing if not accommodating to the clueless.
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:11 pm rating: +5
- #1.4 WanderingPenguin
  
  Hmm. Is that a choice? Where’s the vote button?
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:15 pm rating: +5
- #1.5 Rocky
  
  OH-OH WP, isn’t W007 spelled double-u, zero, zero, seven?
  
  Can it be? No, you must have done that on purpose. It was a test, right? My idol CANNOT have clay feet!!!!
  
  I will be in mourning…….
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 12:00 am rating: 0
- #1.6 GhostWriter
  
  Kudos for the Fozzy shtick!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 8:21 am rating: +3
- #1.7 WanderingPenguin
  
  My 7 is…um…broken. Yeah, that’s the ticket.
  
  Ok, it was a test. Sorry, a 7357. Better?
  
  And thanks, GW! Fozzy rules!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 5:46 pm rating: 0
- #1.8 super_fan99
  
  My post would have said something like that but sounded alot dumber. IPA rocks!
  
  And it’s w00t, with zero’s NO “7″.
  
  Look it up.
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 6:37 pm rating: 0
- #1.9 WanderingPenguin
  
  W00t! Well, I had the zeros in there in the first place… but I thought I had messed up the “t”. I guess it’s only a “7″ in “l337″? Hmm.
  
  Anyhow, I have been wanting to mention this and keep forgetting: not sure if it’s available in the States but up here “IPA” stands for “India Pale Ale”. Seems to me if you have 2 or 3 “IPAs” you won’t need the “I.P.A.” to help you out as much.
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 6:44 pm rating: 0
- #1.10 Canthz_B
  
  Thanks SF99. I was not familiar with the term. I looked in M-W.com but they did not have it. I found it at urbandictionary.com…WOOT!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 6:47 pm rating: 0
- #1.11 Rocky
  
  I absolutely HAD looked it up again to make absolutely sure before I commented, after all, who would have the balls to challenge the Penguin without fact-checking? Certainly not a dedicated fan like myself. Unfortunately, I should have linked (which I have no idea how to do) or copied the web address (which I do know how to do), but did not and am kicking myself now.
  
  I did find this just now in an article about the “word of the year” winner:
  
  “Purists of “l33t speak” often substitute a “7″ for the final “t,” expressing a “w007″ of victory Ã¢â‚¬â€ an “in your face” of sorts…..” which makes the WP 100% correct in 10.9! Thank GOD no clay feet!
  
  My original technical misinformation came from the original article which reported it being named “word of the year” on Yahoo news (never again). I now stand corrected as I did not realize the “7″ was an alternate spelling - the original headline spelled it W-0-0-7 (foiled by the damned sensationalist headlines!!!!).
  
  And WP - you are truly a gentleman for not rubbing my face in it. I also love the “broken” retort - you are also apparently a Master of Quick Thinking!
  
  I bow to the Master and am now humbly donning the Unitard.
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 7:43 pm rating: +1
- #1.12 super_fan99
  
  I only know that because I’m a gamer geek. I always spelled LEET like “1337″ but, who can say what’s right? It’s all just made up shit.
  
  My favorite is “pwn”.
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 8:03 pm rating: +1
- #1.13 WanderingPenguin
  
  Exactly. If the word is “fantastic” anyhow, then spell it any way you damn well feel.
  
  Wait, that doesn’t sound like me. Hmm. Let me rethink and get back to you…
  
  Rocky, you have about 1,000 Get Out Of Jail Free Cards, believe me!
  
  SF99 - I will have to shorten this story for space constraints…but I dropped my teenage daughter at a party last summer where she couldn’t figure out which door to use to go in. I told her the one I thought was right, she went to a different one only to have the Dad of the house come out of the one I chose and say “it’s THIS one!”. After she went in, I took out my cell and texted her: “Ha ha! You were pwned!” The guy throwing the party saw this message…dropped his jaw in awe and said, “Your Dad can come to any of my parties anytime!”
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 9:03 pm rating: +1
- #1.14 Rocky
  
  See, I knew you are awesome!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 9:13 pm rating: +1
- #1.15 park rose
  
  bintgodess’ comment under the last of any of the comments on this thread (mine at this moment) will seem to put a dampener on anything written , though I know she was referring to the note!
  
  A penguin with clay feet is a penguin in trouble.
  
  Dec 20, 2007 at 5:16 am rating: 0
add to this thread
#2 bintgoddess

Um… ew.

Dec 18, 2007 at 10:46 pm rating: 0

reply to this comment
#3 mamason

This too shall pass.

Dec 18, 2007 at 10:53 pm rating: +12

reply to this comment
- #3.1 Karen
  
  OMG ! First laugh of the night !
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:30 pm rating: +1
add to this thread
#4 mamason

Please forgive me, oh thou of the silent and immaculate defecation! My flatulence has long been the bane of my existence. Beano! Beano! Where fart thou, Beano?

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:09 pm rating: +8

reply to this comment
- #4.1 amy d
  
  I’m not worthy! That is all.
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:30 pm rating: +1
- #4.2 mamason
  
  Amy, you are more than!
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:55 pm rating: 0
add to this thread
#5 Canthz_B

With farts like those, just be glad those walls are shatter-proof!

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:10 pm rating: +1

reply to this comment
#6 anglophile

I suppose the walls aren’t smellproof either?

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:12 pm rating: +5

reply to this comment
- #6.1 Rocky
  
  “Dear Neighbor,
  As a 30 year professional health person……”
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 12:01 am rating: +7
add to this thread
#7 Life With Buck

If you don’t like it then Stop Listening When I Pee!

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:13 pm rating: +2

reply to this comment
#8 Canthz_B

This is what happens when you put the blind guy’s desk near the restroom!

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:15 pm rating: +4

reply to this comment
- #8.1 Kt
  
  This is what happens when you put the blind guy’s desk IN the restroom!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 9:17 am rating: +5
add to this thread
#9 WanderingPenguin

I wonder if anyone can hear you washing your hair in this triflin’ office washroom?

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:17 pm rating: +4

reply to this comment
#10 morpho aurora

instead of using your time to analyze the noises from the bathrooms try doing your job - if you had enough time to make a sign, perhaps there isn’t enough work piled on your desk
the maker of this sign is now responsible for subsequent UTIs and leakage.

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:19 pm rating: +1

reply to this comment
#11 Wade

Perhaps they should loosen the bolt that secures the exhaust fan.

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:20 pm rating: +5

reply to this comment
- #11.1 WanderingPenguin
  
  But then the neighb upstairs would leave an icky-sweet threatening letter about the smell at 4 the next morning….
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:22 pm rating: +3
- #11.2 Wade
  
  it takes a light touch
  
  not enough to render it ineffective in its main function
  
  just enough to make a racket loud enough to mask any other, er, noises
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:30 pm rating: +6
- #11.3 WanderingPenguin
  
  Sounds like experience talking?
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 5:47 pm rating: +1
add to this thread
#12 Canthz_B

Shouldn’t you expect these things if you work at CCFA?

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:25 pm rating: +4

reply to this comment
- #12.1 Rocky
  
  Jeez, there really is a website for everything. And now, introducing duets……Crohn’s & Colitis, both just one convenient click way. I may never stop laughing.
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 12:05 am rating: +3
add to this thread
#13 anglophile

I’m thinking they could just install some speakers to pipe in music throughout the office. A repeating loop of The Osmonds Greatest Hits seems appropriate.

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:28 pm rating: +4

reply to this comment
- #13.1 Canthz_B
  
  I like it! Listen to crap or listen to crapping!
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:43 pm rating: +5
- #13.2 mamason
  
  How about, “She Dropped the Bomb on Me”?
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:52 pm rating: +3
- #13.3 mamason
  
  Or, “Plop, plop, fizz, fizz. Oh what a relief it is”.
  
  Dec 18, 2007 at 11:54 pm rating: +3
- #13.4 amy d
  
  Studying the title of this thread also brings to mind a certain Salt-N-Peppa song.
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 12:35 am rating: +4
- #13.5 amy d
  
  Oh, and Rocky? Aren’t you glad I didn’t say Pepper? Aaah, push it!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 12:39 am rating: +3
- #13.6 mamason
  
  real good, amy!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 1:14 am rating: +1
- #13.7 Rocky
  
  Tee-hee amy d!
  
  Also: Touche`!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 1:11 pm rating: +1
- #13.8 amy d
  
  I can laugh at myself, Rocky
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 1:18 pm rating: +1
add to this thread
#14 amy d

The sign maker was very careful to not ASSume the gender of the offender. Kudos.

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:35 pm rating: +4

reply to this comment
#15 TygerAKC

GREAT! Some of us weren’t self conscious enough about using a semi-public restroom to begin with, now we KNOW someone is listening rather than just WONDERING if someone is listening!!

Dec 18, 2007 at 11:48 pm rating: +6

reply to this comment
#16 Detective Julie

Maybe they’re talking about SEXY bodily functions going on in the stalls, since they also mention “conversations”. Woo woo!

Dec 19, 2007 at 12:16 am rating: +2

reply to this comment
- #16.1 mamason
  
  Yeah, I’d be wondering if the note writer was talking about the massive massive I grunted off the other day or is s/he talking about the blow job I gave the Xerox guy. I wonder…
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 1:18 am rating: +3
add to this thread
#17 Crash

I think it would be “conciderate to others” if someone wasn’t listening to “others” going to the bathroom, but that’s just me.
Anyway……..

Dec 19, 2007 at 12:48 am rating: +4

reply to this comment
#18 Eilis

If you can’t make bathroom noises in the bathroom, where should you make them?
I suppose farting while alone in an empty elevator would be frowned upon as well.

Team Where Ever You Be, May Your Wind Be Free!

Dec 19, 2007 at 1:03 am rating: +7

reply to this comment
#19 Canthz_B

I’m sorry, I’m having trouble getting my mind around just how the sign-maker expects others to eliminate poopy-air-pockets.
Heck, sometimes you don’t even know if it’s going to be solid, liquid or gas! Let alone a Tweener!

Dec 19, 2007 at 1:12 am rating: +7

reply to this comment
- #19.1 mamason
  
  Poopy-air-pockets! lol Just another tasty treat from the makers of Hot Pockets!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 1:20 am rating: +4
- #19.2 paragoddess
  
  Hot Pockets tend to create poopy-air-pockets! Now I can’t stop laughing!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 8:57 am rating: +2
- #19.3 Lorelie
  
  Gawd. I’m awestruck at the thought of trying to microwave a poopy-air-pocket. Do you get a little crisper sleeve for it?
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 1:04 pm rating: +3
- #19.4 unholyghost2003
  
  have you seen Jim Gaffigan’s stand-up? diarrhea pocket!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 4:13 pm rating: 0
add to this thread
#20 Canthz_B

To Jingle Bells…Happy Holidays
Drop my pants,
Take my stance,
Holler, “Bombs away”!
Hope my friends,
Don’t lend an ear,
As I flush my turds today, Hey!

Wipe my butt,
Mirror strut,
Perhaps wash my hair.
Take my leave,
My own pet peeve,
Is that creepy Frank’s out there!

Dec 19, 2007 at 1:45 am rating: +12

reply to this comment
- #20.1 Eilis
  
  niiiice.
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 1:56 am rating: 0
- #20.2 Rachel
  
  That was hilarious!
  
  Dec 19, 2007 at 2:32 am rating: 0
add to this thread
#21 maria

LMAO!!! ahaha that was funny.

Dec 19, 2007 at 1:53 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
#22 Canthz_B

never mind

Dec 19, 2007 at 2:20 am rating: 0

painfully polite and hilariously hostile writings from shared spaces the world over

oh dear

December 18th, 2007 · 136 comments

136 responses so far ↓