crying over sour milk

January 29th, 2008 · 117 comments

ashley in chicago says her roommates are the king and queen of passive-aggressive notes. (”if they ever found this site, they’d think it was a self help group,” she says.) the latest example:
bloodcurdling

ashley’s still fuming over this one. “i mean, come on just throw it away yourself! you’re probably exerting more energy writing the email and stressing about it,” she says. “and, why do you think i’ve been spending so much time at my boyfriend’s anyway?”

Tags: chicago · cleaning · fridge · roommates · would you mind?

117 responses so far ↓

  • #1  senor subagua

    that sour milk was fucking disgusting

    sorry… couldn’t resist

    Jan 29, 2008 at 9:52 pm   rating: +3  

     
  • #2  landshark

    Nice!

    Jan 29, 2008 at 9:53 pm   rating: 0  

     
  • #3  landshark

    That is some grade A, top choice passive aggression!

    Jan 29, 2008 at 9:54 pm   rating: +1  

     
  • #4  lola

    did it ever occur to ashley that the roommates can’t do these things themselves? look at how hard it is to open milk jugs! and tearing off a piece of aluminum foil to lay in the bottom of the oven is just TOO DAMNED COMPLICATED - all those jagged teeth… ugh!

    Jan 29, 2008 at 10:16 pm   rating: +3  

     
  • #5  Grimfool_Reluctant

    Pathetic. Sure, it’s not your “responsibility” to throw out the soured milk, but it also wasn’t your responsibility to clean out the “crap” in the oven that was causing your house to fill with smoke. Apply the same logic to the milk, roomie. (Obviously these people don’t work at the Franz Ferdinand Sciences Lab!)
    P.S. — C’mon, Ashley, I think we all know why you’re spending time at your boyfriend’s house, wink, wink, nudge nudge.
    P.P.S.– You mean this ISN’T a self-help group?

    Jan 29, 2008 at 10:20 pm   rating: +2  

    • #5.1  secondsout

      Hi, my name is Secondsout. I’ve been Passive Aggressive for about 28 years. I also like reading and leaving obnoxious messages about other people’s passive aggression.

      Oh damn, that’s right, this isn’t a self-help group.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 5:13 pm   rating: +3  

       
     
  • #6  boris

    sour, curdled milk is fucking disgusting, especially if you don’t drink milk yourself.

    a room full of smoke, pretty annoying - depends upon how often it happens as to how irritating it rates (or grates).

    having roomies expect you to throw out their 4 week old, fungus sprouting, sewer pit smelling, mutton stew (or anything similiar), is just plain lazy, inconsiderate and, yeah, disrespectful.

    Jan 29, 2008 at 10:25 pm   rating: +1  

    • #6.1  pry

      i agree. take care of your shit if you have roommates. dealing with other people’s trash gets old. fast.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 12:08 pm   rating: +2  

       
    • #6.2  terri

      Totally agree. I’m going to guess that if they felt the need to write the note, it isn’t just a one time cleaning up after.

      Passive Aggressive, yup. Necessary note to get lazy ass roomie to clean up after herself, for sure.

      Feb 4, 2008 at 12:51 pm   rating: 0  

       
    • #6.3  April

      Wow, can’t believe someone has the nerve to post that note. That’s truly disgusting, leaving rotting milk for someone else to take care of. I’d rather leave with a passive aggressive note leaver than a disgusting thoughtless slob.

      Feb 10, 2008 at 10:34 am   rating: 0  

       
     
  • #7  Wade

    There is no use crying over soured milk.

    Jan 29, 2008 at 10:29 pm   rating: +2  

    • #7.1  q-tip

      a full cream sour gets the water works.

      skim? just a tear or two.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 1:50 am   rating: +2  

       
     
  • #8  A.A guy

    Try pouring your old milk into her new carton and really give her something to bitch about. Or you could just label it “urine sample”.

    Jan 29, 2008 at 10:32 pm   rating: +3  

    • #8.1  jnadreau

      You’re on a roll with this whole urine sample thing, aren’t you!

      Jan 30, 2008 at 8:31 pm   rating: 0  

       
     
  • #9  Maddy

    I’m on my own personal learning curve.
    Cheers

    Jan 29, 2008 at 10:33 pm   rating: 0  

     
  • #10  Grimfool_Reluctant

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GiHh1u2poOg
    System of a Down/Power Struggle

    Give it a whiff,
    Milk in a funky carton,
    I wouldn’t sniff,
    It smells like some cow fartin’,
    Smoke in the air,
    But I cleaned the oven for you,
    It isn’t fair,
    Milk in a funky carton,

    Seeing you are not here, us, we are here
    With the sour milk,
    Inhaling, then paling, wheezing,
    The sour struggle,
    We can’t throw it out,
    Right in the sour struggle,
    We can’t throw it out,
    Right in the sour struggle.

    Wearing gas masks,
    Milk in a funky carton,
    Just thought I’d ask,
    Not grant another pardon
    Fumes in the air,
    But it is waiting for you,
    It isn’t fair,
    Milk in a funky carton,

    Seeing you are not here, us, we are here
    With the sour milk,
    Inhaling, then paling, wheezing,
    The sour struggle,
    We can’t throw it out,
    Right in the sour struggle,
    We can’t throw it out,
    Right in the sour struggle.
    We can’t throw it out,
    In the sour struggle,
    We can’t throw it out,
    In the sour struggle.

    May I remind you,
    May I remind you,
    May I remind you, May I remind you,
    May I remind you,
    May I remind you, May I remind you,
    May I remind you,
    May I remind you,
    May I remind you,
    May I remind you,
    May I remind you,
    Your milk is past its expiration,

    Seeing you are not here, us, we are here
    With the sour milk,
    Inhaling, then paling, wheezing,
    The sour struggle,
    We can’t throw it out,
    Right in the sour struggle,
    We can’t throw it out,
    Right in the sour struggle.
    We can’t throw it out,
    In the sour struggle.

    Jan 29, 2008 at 10:41 pm   rating: +6  

    • #10.1  Ozymandias

      Rage against the lactin! (say it with a French accent).

      Niiice!

      Jan 29, 2008 at 11:43 pm   rating: +1  

       
     
  • #11  rachel

    sorry y’all, i agree with boris. ashley must have never smelled sour milk. that shit is NASTY, and i’m not about to throw out somebody else’s expired crap.

    as for the oven, is she suggesting it just never get cleaned? cause she’s obviously not volunteering to do it herself. if anyone’s being passive aggressive here, it’s ashley, who’s trying to dodge any and all domestic responsibility by simply not being there.

    Jan 29, 2008 at 11:03 pm   rating: +5  

     
  • #12  jacquilynne

    I wouldn’t want to throw out someone’s skanky ass milk, either. The smell of rotting milk makes me wretch. Then I’d have to follow up emptying their skanky assed milk carton with cleaning up my skanky assed puke, and frankly, that’s a whole lot more energy than sending an email to the inconsiderate roommate who apparently can’t throw her own milk away.

    Jan 29, 2008 at 11:50 pm   rating: +2  

     
  • #13  Writerrejected

    Wow, that’s some douchey PAN. Just throw the skanky milk out, rommie; I’d hardly call that a roommate duty. I also love how dangerous everything seems to this roommate. It reminds me of Hill Street Blues, when the Captain always said, “Okay, let’s be careful out there.” Only he was talking about being cops, and she’s talking about baking cookies. I say: totally annoying.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 12:02 am   rating: +2  

    • #13.1  gothceltgirl

      I have lived with passive-aggressive note-leavers and trust me its no treat. Not everyone has the same level of neatness, some people are busy, forgetful, have ADD, etc. You never know what another person is thinking. Confrontation is always the best option. Have a roomate meeting and talk in a calm manner. Leaving notes just makes people angry. I am so glad that I live alone & Goddess willing will never have to subject myself to the horrors of roomates again.

      Mar 5, 2008 at 12:02 am   rating: 0  

       
     
  • #14  pallasathena

    Well, if she’s never home, she’s hardly the one baking and making a mess of the oven.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 12:21 am   rating: +1  

     
  • #15  mango

    Hmm I don’t see anything wrong with your roommate’s letter. If anything it seems as if it’s justified. Throw your shit away, clean up after your mess. Sort of basic stuff…No wait that is basic but then again some people don’t know how to even do that. I hope your roommate continues to educate you seems like you need it if you can’t even throw out milk.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 1:28 am   rating: 0  

     
  • #16  estella

    oh my gosh!! so reminds me of my old roomate… she hated having magnets on the front of the fridge so everytime she moved them on the side I’d move them to the front just to piss her off.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 1:55 am   rating: +1  

     
  • #17  Tyler

    I guess I don’t see what the huge deal is of throwing away a carton of milk if it is smelling up the place and the person is gone. (Considering there are much worse issues…theft, rocks, and anything having to do with feces) Then again I usually just pen up the rage and skip PA and go straight to A…

    Jan 30, 2008 at 1:58 am   rating: 0  

    • #17.1  q-tip

      a p/a note is penned-up rage!

      :D

      if you’ve gotta throw it out, you’ve gotta throw it out, but curdled milk is chunky, difficult to get down the drain, and smells vewy, vewy, bad.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 2:27 am   rating: +3  

       
     
  • #18  skim

    I’m with the roommates on this one. Spoiled milk and oven crap is pure evil. I would have hand written the note with a scratch n sniff box where she could confirm that the milk was indeed expired.
    oh and then i’d tape the note to a broom in her room.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 2:04 am   rating: 0  

     
  • #19  Life With Buck

    “Know” this Ashley, your roommates are total tools.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 2:49 am   rating: 0  

     
  • #20  jean_luc_turbo

    Uhh, sour milk happens…all concerned should consider oneself deputized to throw it out. ‘Specially like when you took out the Three Mile Island tongs to check the carton’s expiration date–howzabout continuing the process and throw it out.

    OH and thanks for the enlightenment about how WE ALL use the oven, thought you were too caught up your Freudian anal retentive period to actually not let food out in the open air, let alone be prepared in a communal oven…

    …this is why I live A-PHUCKING-LONE!

    Oh and while I’m catharsing vicariously…it’s YOU’RE not YOUR, cheerleader…

    Jan 30, 2008 at 3:17 am   rating: 0  

    • #20.1  pickle

      Catharsing vicariously??

      Jan 30, 2008 at 6:10 am   rating: +1  

       
    • #20.2  grammarama

      Where is the “your” that should be a “you’re”? I don’t see it….

      Jan 30, 2008 at 9:56 am   rating: 0  

       
    • #20.3  amy d

      First sentence, 2nd to last word.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 10:11 am   rating: 0  

       
    • #20.4  grammarama

      Ah yes! And I read it through twice, looking for it. It’s like one of those optical illusions…. or, I am just a dumb ass.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 10:20 am   rating: 0  

       
    • #20.5  amy d

      It was hiding in plain sight. Sneaky , very sneaky.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 6:48 pm   rating: +1  

       
     
  • #21  Neil

    Okay…..this person seems to have the place to him or herself…..or at least one room mate away and they are complaining about sour milk….throw it out yourself you cow…you are saving a fortune on electric and hydro bills in the absense of your roomies…and have more space to yourself….throwing out sour milk sounds like a great trade off….maybe your roomies are not around because of you…maybe beacause you are too sour…sounds like they’ve already thrown you away….

    Jan 30, 2008 at 3:56 am   rating: 0  

    • #21.1  LJ

      That’s exactly my philosophy. My roomie drove me absolutely insane and made me not want to spend any time in our place.

      I decided to try an experiment. I essentially vacated the apartment for two months, coming home to change, do laundry, shower, etc. All the things that she had been complaining about me doing (leaving my dishes for a whole two days, not putting my shoes on the mat even if there was no room) she did herself. I called her on it. Problems solved.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 9:12 am   rating: +1  

       
     
  • #22  Cobriel

    I agree with ashley on this. I have housemates who if they didn’t make the mess, no matter how small or easy to clean up (seriously, they once left one of my hairs in the shower, but removed all of theirs), and choose to bitch about it through some shitty note.

    Why did they wait for the milk to go off? It’s hardly like she would have wanted it after it had gone off. Just throw it out! It can’t be worse than suffering with a rank smelling fridge.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 4:11 am   rating: 0  

    • #22.1  Miss Muffet

      you threw away my milk! I was saving that to make curds and whey. :x

      Jan 30, 2008 at 5:33 am   rating: +3  

       
     
  • #23  q-tip

    I wonder what the other ‘really old stuff’ was?

    Jan 30, 2008 at 5:26 am   rating: +1  

    • #23.1  the sos

      i thought the “other really old stuff” comment was the passive-aggressive bomb! not just old stuff, but really old stuff…

      Jan 30, 2008 at 10:11 am   rating: +1  

       
     
  • #24  rt

    Spoiled milk may be smelly but the wrath of a roommate is less tolerable. If someone who lived with me left a sorry note like that then I would give them a real reason to complain.

    I’m assuming that Ashley and said roommates moved in with each other because they are/were friends– so they should be communicating with each other in a more decent manner than a passive-aggressive note.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 5:44 am   rating: 0  

     
  • #25  Miss Muffet

    garbage, milk

    I am milk
    I am Ashley’s kitchen
    And I am sour
    Sour as a heaving motion

    Date is past
    So I smell cruel
    But I’d be love and sweetness
    If out you threw (me).

    I’m waiting
    I’m waiting for you
    I’m waiting
    I’m waiting for you

    All this week
    What a pong
    I can use my peeves to
    Bring you home

    I’m waiting
    I’m waiting for you
    I’m waiting
    I’m waiting for you
    I’m waiting
    I’m waiting for you

    Ashley’s milk
    Ashley’s not in kitchen
    Ashley’s food
    food to heat a rancid potion.

    She’s waiting
    She’s waiting for you
    She’s waiting
    She’s waiting for you

    She’s waiting
    She’s waiting for you
    She’s has baking
    Has baking to do

    She’s waiting
    She’s waiting
    She’s waiting for you.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 7:09 am   rating: +2  

    • #25.1  Alix

      Bwahaha! Excellent Miss Moffat. Its fun to find another person who knows about Garbage. (An oddly appropriatw band name for this thread, eh?).

      Jan 30, 2008 at 1:05 pm   rating: +2  

       
     
  • #26  Rachel

    As someone who’s CONSTANTLY cleaning up after my incompetent roommate, I sympathize with the note leaver. It’s like my mom always tells me: if I wanted to have kids to clean up after, I would’ve gotten knocked up in high school like all my friends.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 9:03 am   rating: +2  

     
  • #27  Making a Confession here

    I once left a note INSIDE my cereal box. I knew my roommate would see it when she ate my cereal. And she did. :)

    Jan 30, 2008 at 9:15 am   rating: +4  

    • #27.1  Livvy

      Talk about passive aggressive. You should submit that note instead of the one above!

      Jan 30, 2008 at 10:14 am   rating: 0  

       
     
  • #28  Rush

    Sounds like Ashley is just a lazy little peice of crap to me. Clean up after yourself you lazy little lump.. Or go home to your Momma..

    Jan 30, 2008 at 9:20 am   rating: 0  

     
  • #29  amy d

    That note really is painfully polite.

    Team Just ‘Cause You’re Shacking Up Somewhere Else Doesn’t Mean You Forfeit Responsibility.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 9:26 am   rating: +2  

     
  • #30  Sister Sassy

    My college roommate would leave sticky notes on the VCR and light switch that said “Turn me off”…and we lived in the Dorm. I’m sure she was just being energy conscious but COME ON

    Jan 30, 2008 at 10:58 am   rating: 0  

    • #30.1  durian

      In a dorm this probably is OTT.

      In an office of 4, we have a colleague who leaves the electric kettle on (doesn’t switch off automatically when it boils dry), and the heater. She is always the last leave and so it is too rude to switch these things off while she is there.

      The direct approach, ‘Hey, could you switch everything off when you leave?”, gets old fast. How many times do you have to say something before it sinks in? Leaving a note seems to be the only thing that has worked so far.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 7:38 pm   rating: +1  

       
    • #30.2  BoggyWoggy

      Errr…Durian. I hate, “Hey, could you switch everything off when you leave?” statements! It’s like you’re ASKING for her to do it! Then, she’s doing YOU a favor if she does it.
      Instead, get over the passivity. Say, “We’re leaving now. You’re the last one. Oh, and turn off the fuckin’ shit when you leave tonight.”

      Jan 30, 2008 at 8:52 pm   rating: 0  

       
    • #30.3  durian

      nice atmosphere in your office, boggy?

      Jan 30, 2008 at 9:41 pm   rating: +1  

       
     
  • #31  mere

    i’m sort of on the side of the note writer.. just in the fact that if ashley is spending so much time at her boyfriend’s, then why even buy milk?
    why buy anything? why even live there?

    now, as for throwing out the milk.. the note writer should (dispose of said milk) if he’s so bothered by it.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 11:26 am   rating: +1  

     
  • #32  KickitKitsune

    Sorry Ashley,

    I’m with your roomates on this one. You bought it, you let it sour, you throw it out. It’s one thing to do somebody a favour when you’re cleaning out the fridge, but to expect them to clean up after you is just disrespectful.

    Plus, you could have used the energy you used posting this to passiveagressivenotes to clean out your stinky milk.

    Or, maybe you can give your roomates some cash– if you’re expecting them to clean up after you like a maid.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 12:18 pm   rating: 0  

    • #32.1  KittyKat

      Seems like she’s probably already giving the roommate some cash - i.e., I’m guessing she pays half of the bills but is hardly ever there. So even though roomie is using most of the water, electricity, etc., Ashley is probably paying half.
      Wait until that roommate has kids - sour milk will be nothing compared to the God-awful messes those things make!

      Jan 30, 2008 at 1:30 pm   rating: 0  

       
     
  • #33  Aleks

    I can kind of see this from both sides, but I honestly don’t see why the the roomie wouldn’t just toss out the bad milk. Don’t even open it, just take it directly to the Dumpster. No muss, no fuss. And no more smell. And, geez Ashley, why don’t you move out if your roommates bug you so much? May I suggest your boyfriend’s place? As you’re spending so much time there you don’t get to even see your wonderful roommates anymore…

    Jan 30, 2008 at 1:05 pm   rating: +3  

    • #33.1  durian

      recycling, perhaps, might be a reason to open it.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 7:24 pm   rating: +1  

       
     
  • #34  SarahArah

    This is obviously the first time this happened, or the she would have been complaining about that too. The first time around, I don’t see why she can’t just say “oh she must have forgotten, I’ll help her out” instead of “how dare she do this”. I also strongly doubt the milk was actually curdling, she seems like she is exaggerating. I’ve had roommates leave expired milk in the fridge for much longer than that and it doesn’t affect anything around it or smell unless it’s opened. As for “common roommate duties” why should you make an effort to go home specifically to clean up after them if you aren’t even using the place? I wouldn’t want to spend time at home either if she’s always this hostile. Luckily you have somewhere to escape. Good luck riding out the rest of the lease!

    Jan 30, 2008 at 1:19 pm   rating: 0  

     
  • #35  Max

    I’m sort of on the side of the “note writer” on this one. If you are not home very often, then don’t buy things and let them spoil in the fridge.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 1:28 pm   rating: 0  

     
  • #36  mmm

    Team Ashley all the way. It was a JUG of milk. There was NO smell- it was just gross looking. The note writing bitch should have no problem just tossing it out with the chunks of burnt cheese from the oven. Sour milk does not warrant a note. Neither does the fact that you are going to clean out an oven. The bitch is looking for a freakin’ medal or something.

    Jan 30, 2008 at 1:29 pm   rating: 0  

    • #36.1  rachel

      news flash: spoiled milk in a jug smells just as bad as spoiled milk in a carton. you have clearly never smelled spoiled milk, nor had to clean out an oven caked with other people’s crap.

      team clean-up-after-yourself-or-move-out ftw.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 1:35 pm   rating: +1  

       
    • #36.2  Miss Muffet

      I need a bit of clarification. This just might be a cultural thing, this is what we call a jug of milk and it would really smell if left in the fridge.

      But the note writer is talking of an expiration date, so I assume it is something like a carton?

      Jan 30, 2008 at 5:49 pm   rating: 0  

       
    • #36.3  rachel

      this is a jug of milk. and yes, it is possible for odors to escape that flimsy little plastic cap.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 6:26 pm   rating: +1  

       
    • #36.4  GVI

      Not after 6 days it won’t.

      Jan 30, 2008 at 9:01 pm   rating: 0  

       
    • #36.5  mmm

      I don’t buy it! So here’s how we’re going t o prove it. Rachel, I’m going to leave out an American jug of milk in the fridge for 6days past expiration with your name on it. If it doesn’t smell, I’ll just leave it there until I clean out the oven (which incidently has been smoking lately) if it does smell, tell you what, I’ll eat my words and wash it down with a gulp of the milk. Fair? (whats ftw, btw?)

      Jan 31, 2008 at 1:12 pm   rating: +1  

       
    • #36.6  unholyghost2003

      The amount of stink is relative to the amount of milk in the jug. A mostly full jug is LESS likely to stink 6 days after expiration, little O2 for the bacteria to suck down and few openings and closings to suck little buggies into the jug. A jug with A GLASS left can stink to high heaven. It has been opened and closed PLENTY to allow bacteria entrance into the jug and it has plenty of O2 for them to breathe.

      For example, I JUST dumped out a NEVER OPENED jug of Egg Nog. It expired Dec 28. I Probably could have had a glass before dumping it down the drain. It smelled and looked fine. I have previously dumped half empty jugs of Egg Nog. … Talk about a source of Fridge stink! The Dairy! The Sugar! It was Disney Land for bacteria.

      All of this begs the question … Why do I buy so much Egg Nog?

      Jan 31, 2008 at 1:40 pm   rating: +1  

       
     
  • #37  JPav

    I love that she emailed a person that lives in her own house. Does no one hand write on a sticky note anymore?

    Jan 30, 2008 at 1:34 pm   rating: +1  

    • #37.1  rachel

      submitter doesn’t come home very often (as the email mentions). god only knows how long it would’ve been before she got a hand-w