“Beware,” indeed: Walking along “West 25th or so” in Manhattan, this “work of art” was enough to make Eric “personally” “shit his pants.”
extra credit: The Zagat history of my last relationship [The New Yorker]
From the Zagat Guide to Threatening Signage
January 31st, 2008 · 88 comments
FILED UNDER: New York · not-so-veiled threats · unnecessary "quotation marks"
88 responses so far ↓
#1
miss muffet
“got” enough “tape there?”
Jan 31, 2008 at 10:05 pm rating: 16
#2
Detective Julie
I’m “afeared”!
Jan 31, 2008 at 10:08 pm rating: 4
#3
rubberducky75
Damn the quotation marks!!! I can just see her making little “air quotes” (ha ha) with her fingers…
Jan 31, 2008 at 10:09 pm rating: 2
#4
bigduh
Personally speaking, I am afraid of anyone that makes unprovoked threats, and feels the need to tape all activity. Isn’t that the government’s job?
Jan 31, 2008 at 10:09 pm rating: 5
#5
miss muffet
Sting wrote this one ; he recorded it on vinyl, cd and tape (sorry).
Jan 31, 2008 at 10:11 pm rating: 1
#6
Canthz_B
WOW!!! A free watch just for standing underneath the camera!
Jan 31, 2008 at 10:28 pm rating: 1
#7
Canthz_B
My knees knocked upon my first reading of this one. Then I realized that it is directed at “you” not aimed at “me”!
Jan 31, 2008 at 10:31 pm rating: 3
#8
pingu
1. Love that “someone” else added the apostrope and ‘e’ to “your”
2. under camera seems to be an animation style – could it be Wallace & Gromit are behind (or under )the sign?
This would explain the huge strips of tape (no opposable thumbs to speak of).
3. How did they know it was my doppelganger and not me walking along the street, huh CB? (“you”).
4. I guess that is why I must beware.
5. I don’t know wether I’m looking forward to, or scared of, being dealt with – very soon – personally.
Jan 31, 2008 at 10:47 pm rating: 2
#9
fantasy
“Candid Camera” (theme song)
“Beware” when you least expect it,
You’ll regret it
Very soon’s My lucky day “Beware”,
You’re under camera
Hocus, Pocus, You’re the “Focus”,
It’s My “Lucky” Day,
“Beware” You’re being “Watched”
You’re under camera,
If you think I’m foolin’
I’ll “Deal” with “you’ and
“In Person”too,
So “Beware”,
It’s my “Lucky” Day
So when you least expect it, you’ll regret it,
I’ll be seein’ you
“Personally”I’ll enjoy it,
On that very Day
So “Beware” You’re under “Camera”!
Jan 31, 2008 at 11:15 pm rating: 3
#10
Canthz_B
Apparently, the PANuary quota of exclamation points was maxed out on the previous not. This one screams for a few!
Jan 31, 2008 at 11:18 pm rating: 2
#11
Kelly
Oh wait…so as long as I’m not UNDER the camera, I’m not being watched? Sweet.
Jan 31, 2008 at 11:59 pm rating: 0
#12
DrAstroZoom
Oh yes, I’ll deal with “you” — if, in fact, that is your real name.
Feb 1, 2008 at 12:49 am rating: 11
#13
Questionnert
“My” my, “what” did “I” do “wrong” “?”
Feb 1, 2008 at 3:03 am rating: 4
#14
Tyler
I’ll add a comment -very soon-
Feb 1, 2008 at 3:49 am rating: 3
#15
RALPHY
My, My–We’re being a little testy today-Aren’t we? Oh, by the way-I stole your camera!
Feb 1, 2008 at 6:45 am rating: 0
#16
Lurker
Do the triple euphemisms cancel each other out, like double negatives?
Feb 1, 2008 at 8:27 am rating: 3
#17
GhostWriter
So that’s where that cue card went! There we were, filming scene 8 of our James Bond spoof, and suddenly the vixen and the villian are searching for their next lines- Thank you, Mr. Cue Card Taper-Upper, and now, on with the show!
Feb 1, 2008 at 8:54 am rating: 4
#18
mere
i don’t understand.
how do you watch someone under a camera? is the person being watched under camera, or is it the watcher? either way, it’s got to be uncomfortable.
the watcher says ‘i’ll deal with you later’. what are you going to deal? cards? the watcher and watchee are going to play poker?
so many quotation marks… so little time….
Feb 1, 2008 at 9:36 am rating: 1
#19
GhostWriter
Doesn’t the scribble under “Beware” look like a cursive “Crime“?
In fact, doesn’t the whole note seem like something a superhero would say??
Team UnderCameraMan!
Feb 1, 2008 at 9:58 am rating: 3
#20
GhostWriter
Coincidentally, this note happens to the same script Office Depot employees are taught to greet customers with.
Feb 1, 2008 at 10:15 am rating: 2
#21
unholyghost2003
At first I was afraid, I was petrified … kept thinking “I’m watched by you when I’m outside” …
Sorry song parodies are not my thing … anywho further reflection on this sign … I am not afraid of the sign maker. People worth being afraid of personally do not leave signs warning of cameras and PERSONAL dealings, they lean against walls with baseball bats rolled in broken glass. I have $5 that says the sign maker is 5’2″ 85lbs and a 7th level magic user.
Feb 1, 2008 at 10:24 am rating: 6
#22
secondsout
I think this is just a sad attempt for someone to try to get attention for himself by getting posted on the blog of unnecessary quotation marks. (see blogroll). Good site, btw, but doesn’t have as many funny, snide comments as this one.
Feb 1, 2008 at 12:24 pm rating: 0
#23
Heather
Do you think she used the quotes because she means those words ironically?
Feb 1, 2008 at 12:31 pm rating: 0
#24
Bellabeastie
I wonder where was the note posted? The corner Convenient store? The entrance to your apartment building? (That WOULD freak me out). A bus stop? Is that a camera over your head or are you just glad to see me “Personally”? So many questions, so few answers… So much tape wasted. sigh
Feb 1, 2008 at 12:45 pm rating: 2
#25
Set To Evil
I like a company that promises prompt and personal service!
Feb 1, 2008 at 1:42 pm rating: 0
#26
WickedLady
Hey guys, I just popped by to say I’m going away for a while. Read my blog about it, if you feel like it, but it’s no big deal or anything. Have fun!
Feb 1, 2008 at 1:51 pm rating: 0
#27
sitboaf
You guys should be happy that something is being done – Rockwell’s on the loose again!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aD21JDMp86c
Feb 1, 2008 at 3:18 pm rating: 0
#28
Adele
what the heck is with the different styles of the letter E (and some other letters too)? It’s like 2 or 3 different people wrote this letter by letter.
Feb 1, 2008 at 6:45 pm rating: 0
#29
Juliet
I love the quotation marks! It love it when they are used in signs especially. My favourites are:
“Fresh” Seafood
Lampshade “Sale”
I haven’t ever come across “you” written anywhere. I don’t know what that means.
Feb 1, 2008 at 8:21 pm rating: 3
#30
raiseyourglass
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ibRNJsCTyg
Feb 1, 2008 at 8:57 pm rating: 0
#31
ALA
I feel this note should read ‘I’ll get “you” my pretty, and “your” little “dog” too.’
Feb 2, 2008 at 9:23 am rating: 4
#32
A.A guy
Damn;
I can’t see any way to fit “urine sample” into this.
Feb 2, 2008 at 9:37 am rating: 1
#33
A.A guy
Well I’m glad that he is going to deal with me personally, cause the other guy scares the shit out of me.
Feb 2, 2008 at 9:41 am rating: 1
#34
bamBAM!!
I guess “you” muther-”f-@$%^!s” couldn’t “think” of a good “comment” that would deserve to “be”
g”ree”n.
my “brain” hurts
Feb 2, 2008 at 12:36 pm rating: 0
#35
Team Cassandra
My friend was just telling me that they actually “hose-down” shoplifting hobos who live in the area at her neighborhood grocery store. And they apologize first. Apparently, you can catch the action on any given day:
“Waddayagotta steal for?! Just go to the back! You just go to the back door, we give you there! Ach! Now, I gotta give you the hose.”
It’s the hose they use on the vegetables.
Feb 2, 2008 at 12:52 pm rating: 2
#36
thegirlfromtheghetto
What a great blog, I’ve enjoyed stumbling across it.
Feb 2, 2008 at 2:18 pm rating: 0
#37
Sue Do Nim
Dear “Personally,”
Thanks for the fair warning. I won’t stand under camera.
Very soon,
“Beware”
Feb 2, 2008 at 3:33 pm rating: 2
#38
bamBAM!!
this is gonna sound kinda “dumbass” but how do the comments get green?? Is it a rating of “+5″ or “what?”
Feb 2, 2008 at 6:00 pm rating: 0
#39
bamBAM!!
I’ve got it!! She does mean the quotes ironically. Instead of “beware” she means, “Be Happy” and instead of “watched” she means “listened to” and instead of “you” she means “your brother-in-law”
Feb 2, 2008 at 6:08 pm rating: 1
#40
bamBAM!!
Could she mean, “you’re being ‘watched’ under camera, i’ll deal with you. Very soon, Personally.”
like, while standing under the camera, she’ll beat the shit out of you?
”I’ll deal with you” is so very vague, she couldn’t have described what kinds of things she would do to you?
Feb 2, 2008 at 6:11 pm rating: 0
#41
A.A guy
Hey;
Maybe the hose has something to with urine samples.All may not yet be lost.
Feb 2, 2008 at 9:44 pm rating: 1
#42
Ange
I love the combination of unnecessary quotations AND passive aggression. Classic and rich.
Feb 3, 2008 at 5:32 pm rating: 0
#43
Team Cassandra
That “very soon” bothers me. (no – it’s not the lack of quotation marks)
It’s just, like, …when?
Now? In five minutes? Tomorrow?
I don’t got all day, you know.
Can I just pay for this stuff and go?
Feb 4, 2008 at 5:33 pm rating: 2
#44
Ali
Has anyone else noticed the e sneakily added to the “they’re” in a different widthed marker. It’s almost as if “they” had forgotten how to “spell”
Apr 28, 2008 at 5:35 am rating: 0
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