laid back? i’ll give you laid back. in fact, i’ll spell it out for you: janice will break your legs.
(thanks to peter in milwaukee for documenting — you’re my number one guy!)
laid back? i’ll give you laid back. in fact, i’ll spell it out for you: janice will break your legs.
(thanks to peter in milwaukee for documenting — you’re my number one guy!)
Tags: crazypants · milwaukee · pure poetry · say wha? · smoking · spelling and grammar police · you call that punctuation?
145 responses so far ↓
#1 claw71

I swear this is the rough draft for Britney’s latest song. My eyes usually glaze over when it comes on over the inane top 40 station the fat office cows groove to but I think this is the song.
Feb 21, 2008 at 10:58 pm rating: +5 
#2 IV:XX
Team Janice, even if her grammar and punctuation are a little off. Cigarettes linger for a while and it’s not pleasant at all.
But I hope she’s not talking about herb…’cause pot smoke is fucking delicious.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:02 pm rating: +1 
#3 Sarah
…”Using me for a place to smoke your cigarettes”?
Whatever goes on in that house is something I want no part of.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:13 pm rating: +5 
#4 Canthz_B

Watch carefully, as the aneurysm progresses the handwriting tilts further and further from the horizontal.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:16 pm rating: +5 
#5 Coke-aholic

For some reason this reminded me of Ben Stiller in Meet the Parents when the stewardess (yeah I still call them that) tried to take his bag. Don’t know why, but it did.
Or, in a different perspective, it looks like the handwriting practice paper of a 7 year old in school.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:19 pm rating: +1 
#6 ER
My impression is that Janice is someone whose first language is not English. And it’s odd how everything’s in cursive except for the “I’m tired of it” at the top..
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:23 pm rating: +1 
#7 cre8tivewmn

Penmanship: 6 of 10
Spelling: 10 of 1o
Composition: 0 of 10.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:28 pm rating: +6 
#8 Troy McClure

Facing clear evidence of illiteracy, we cannot wait for the final proof—the smoking room—that could come in the form of a mushroom trip.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:28 pm rating: +1 
#9 Coke-aholic

Janice needs to invest in lined paper.
And a grammar handbook.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:29 pm rating: +1 
#10 Canthz_B

Janice must be one big, scary b*tch if this girl has to write a note and run rather that just put a no smoking sign on the door of the room she apparently owns.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:32 pm rating: +1 
#11 Canthz_B

I love the afterthought…“what if they want to know why(?)”… “I’m tired of it”
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:34 pm rating: +5 
#12 IV:XX
Probably convinced the smokers no to light up anymore though…although if she had a problem with it and didn’t say anything about it until this PA outburst they might just stay clear altogether.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:35 pm rating: +2 
#13 S.S.
Apparently, his room is a No Punctuation zone as well.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:38 pm rating: +3 
#14 Canthz_B

my room is no smoking room it is my room so don’t smoke
periodFeb 21, 2008 at 11:46 pm rating: +5 
#15 cass
Drunk? Nice script if so.
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:47 pm rating: +1 
#16 DrAstroZoom

To the tune of “Numb” by U2
No more
Smoking for no one
Not at all
But me
And my room is
No smoking room
Or using me
For a place to smoke
Your cigarettes at
No more
My room is
My room and
No one else’s room
So don’t
Demand me what to
Do in my room
Either
Janice
…
…
I feel numb
Feb 21, 2008 at 11:56 pm rating: +6 
#17 meg

atrocious
Feb 22, 2008 at 12:19 am rating: +1 
#18 Will4You
Scary thought: Based on the look of that door I think this note was posted on the door to a dormroom. I shudder to think what Janice’s application essay might read like.
Feb 22, 2008 at 1:20 am rating: +1 
#19 Tyler

It’s too late, so I can’t even understand what she is trying to get across if she wants no smoking or if her room is no smoking but you can smoke if you want to in her room.
Feb 22, 2008 at 1:34 am rating: +1 
#20 Khak
WTF? I don’t think I’ve ever read anything that made LESS sense. I almost want to believe that the paper was bigger, and half (or a 1/3?) of the page got ripped off or something. At least then I assume that it would make sense if the rest of the words were there. If I could just figure out if Janice smokes or not. Almost sounds like somebody said no smoking and she is saying “you can’t tell me what to do in my room”
Feb 22, 2008 at 2:27 am rating: 0 
#21 mamason

Yeah! You can’t demand me what to do either!
Girl power rocks!
Feb 22, 2008 at 2:32 am rating: +7 
#22 mamason

No more smoking for no one not at all but me…
Ummm… okay.
Feb 22, 2008 at 2:35 am rating: +2 
#23 mamason

Maybe what she meant was…
No more smoking for no one? Not at all! Butt me!
Feb 22, 2008 at 2:36 am rating: +5 
#24 Grimfool_Reluctant

not no more passive-aggressive notes for no one or everyone but my door this is my door and my door is no notes so no one but me puts notes and dont use my door for notes but me so using me as a place for notes but for so and therefore why I’m tired of it fucking delicious whew!
Feb 22, 2008 at 3:37 am rating: +19 
#25 park rose

put that at your pipe and smoke it! I demand you.
Feb 22, 2008 at 3:55 am rating: +5 
#26 amy d

Maybe if they demand her to make her room a non-smoking room?
Feb 22, 2008 at 6:48 am rating: +1 
#27 Rumblefish
Read the note like Captain Kirk would read it, line for line. It kind of makes sense.
Also since the text is leaning to the right I am guessing that Janice is a conservative.
Feb 22, 2008 at 7:31 am rating: +6 
#28 aaa
Don’t demand me what to do? I’m seriously hoping that English is Janice’s second language.
Feb 22, 2008 at 8:05 am rating: 0 
#29 Team Cassandra

Yeesh. This is hard. For me, a little too sobering.
It sounds like someone with a limited education and/or mental capacity is being mistreated. I hope Peter took a minute to knock on that door and see if that girlie needs any help.
Feb 22, 2008 at 8:26 am rating: +1