The “Thanks for forgetting my birthday, asshole” thank-you note: Because the only thing that would have made this e-mail from Rebecca’s (32-year-old) brother any better is a midi file soundtrack and a dancing elephant or two.
Adds Rebecca: “My resulting apology just yielded more hate-filled e-mails from him — nevermind that I was camping and he lives in another country which I can’t call from my cell phone! I should have taken the advice of another contributor to this site who said there is no correct way to respond to a passive-aggressive note.”
related: two birds with one snowman
96 responses so far ↓
#1
RALPHY
Hey Dude–so it was your birthday. Did the earth stop turning or was universal peace declared. Get over it! You’re another year older and even your sister doesn’t give a crap. Up-side–your cake was fucking delicious!
Mar 3, 2008 at 9:19 pm rating: 31
#2
anglophile
What, did he turn five?
Mar 3, 2008 at 9:20 pm rating: 36
#3
park rose
Au contraire , Rebecca. Anybody knows the correct way to respond to a P/A note is to submit it to a P/A notes website.
Mar 3, 2008 at 9:23 pm rating: 28
#4
muddgirl
Dude, my birthday was a few days ago, and none of my family called me, or even sent me an email. OMG I MUST CREATE P/A DRAMA ASAP!!
Oh wait, I’m capable of acting like an adult, and recognizing that the world doesn’t and shouldn’t revolve around moi.
Mar 3, 2008 at 9:28 pm rating: 6
#5
Bitch Cakes
Seriously, muddgirl. My own mother doesn’t even call me on my birthday! Rebecca’s brother needs to get over it!
PS Happy Birthday Muddgirl.
Mar 3, 2008 at 9:30 pm rating: 0
#6
bellabeastie
Ok — so you live in Bum Fuck Egypt and I can’t get you by cell.. snail mail will arrive next week, by then it will be Really Late. Oh, and the cookies I wanted to send will have been eaten by me…. cuz I’m camping. And hungry. Oh, regarding your emails… delete is a beautiful thing…
BTW – Happy B-day (do you remember when mine is?).. check-mate.
Mar 3, 2008 at 9:34 pm rating: 1
#7
sswoon
the correct response would have been:
you’re welcome.
who are you?
Mar 3, 2008 at 9:39 pm rating: 31
#8
Writerrejected
Um, but I do think it’s pretty crappy that Sister Mary Forgetful couldn’t get a text message out to Brother Passive/Aggressive’s for his birthday. I notice she doesn’t say whether she actually remembered the day or not. She seems pretty lame with the execuses there.
Mar 3, 2008 at 10:14 pm rating: 1
#9
KittyKat
Give bubby a few more years and he won’t be reminding ANYONE it’s his b-day.
Mar 3, 2008 at 10:21 pm rating: 3
#10
Crash
Is it possible that since he isn’t in the same country that he’s a day ahead of her ???
Maybe… ?
Anyway…Just speculating
Mar 3, 2008 at 10:50 pm rating: 1
#11
claw71
Birthdays are the dumbest celebrations ever.
What did you do? Put your mother through 9 months of agony followed by several hours of excruciating pain and utter humiliation while an attractive doctor watched her swollen vagina expand exponentially to make room for your bald, bulbous head?
I don’t have any candles but I think I’ve got something you can blow.
TEAM GET OVER YOURSELF
Mar 3, 2008 at 11:31 pm rating: 26
#12
Cat Skyfire
It would be funny if she had sent him something (card with money or gift card, or even an actual gift) that just hadn’t reached him because of the joys of international mailing.
Mar 4, 2008 at 12:02 am rating: 4
#13
Troy McClure
AΦ, how about cake and fruit, once a month, after we sing?
Oops! Let’s call this post 11.1.1.
Mar 4, 2008 at 12:04 am rating: 2
#14
Tyler
Team You’re Welcome
Mar 4, 2008 at 12:40 am rating: 0
#15
nicole
This ecard is a good little response to that.
http://www.someecards.com/upload/birthday_n/what_i_ll_remember_most_about_my_birthday_is_that_you_forgot_it.html
Mar 4, 2008 at 12:40 am rating: 1
#16
Sarah
I half-heartedly attempted to wish you a happy birthday, but soon lost interest in the project.
Mar 4, 2008 at 1:27 am rating: 9
#17
Aijaz
I replied to this last week.
thank you
Mar 4, 2008 at 7:54 am rating: 0
#18
GingerE
It would be funnier if they were twins.
Mar 4, 2008 at 8:01 am rating: 3
#19
aaa
How many Rebecca’s brothers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. He just holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.
Mar 4, 2008 at 8:12 am rating: 11
#20
Jaybird
Subject: Yesterday WAS your birthday
Your welcome!
Mar 4, 2008 at 8:52 am rating: 2
#21
kelmeister
It could be worse…every year on my birthday, my mother sends me an email that only says
24 1/2 hours
reminding me of how many hours she spent in labor with me.
Mar 4, 2008 at 9:26 am rating: 8
#22
bellabeastie
Dear Bro: I’d like to say I’m sorry for missing your birthday, but I’m not. Because love means never having to say you’re sorry.
So quit with the bitchy emails already.
P.S. Anyway, I’ve hated you since sophmore year when you ratted me out to Mom that I got drunk and puked behind the neighbor’s garage while they were out of town.
Your Sis, Rebecca
Mar 4, 2008 at 9:46 am rating: 1
#23
Mishee
At least this guy was born the day after Valentine’s Day – a fake holiday.
Try being born the Day after Christmas (like myself) and see how many people remember your birthday then you selfish bastard!!
Mar 4, 2008 at 10:39 am rating: 0
#24
Katzndogz
All he needs is for Jake Ryan to show up with a birthday cake and some panties, and he’ll be right as rain.
Mar 4, 2008 at 10:58 am rating: 2
#25
Dave
I didn’t forget. I sent you the world’s smallest violin. Glad to see you’ve mastered it already.
Love,
Rebecca
Mar 4, 2008 at 12:09 pm rating: 19
#26
Juliet
That is awesome! If e-mail had existed in 1990, I would have received one exactly like this from my dad…
One year my dad threw a fit because I didn’t call on his birthday. The problem was that my parents had a new phone number and hadn’t updated me. My mom gave me hell because she had to put up with my dad. It was funny after I got off the phone. I’m so glad we don’t live in the same city.
Mar 4, 2008 at 12:39 pm rating: 2
#27
the dawd
This one time before i was married…I took my wife out for her birthday. We went to the zoo, and i got her a present. After the zoo we went out for diner, and when i tried to pay…declined. So my future wife had to pay for her own birthday dinner. Over a decade later she continues to remind me about this by telling every new person we become friends with that the first birthday she spent with me cost her $90.
A month later was my birthday, and at that age we were both broke a lot. I bought her a card and a stuffed toy to show appreciation for making my birthday worth having. She couldn’t even afford to buy me a card
Although i do know better than to tell this story in the really real world.
Mar 4, 2008 at 1:01 pm rating: 5
#28
Quite Contrary
It’s not the note that I find so pathetic. It is the fact that he, a 32 year old, sent it to his sister. Because, really, this is a note that I am sure has gone to a many ex- or soon-to-be-ex significant others (or roommates who left pizza cardboard in the oven).
Mar 4, 2008 at 1:58 pm rating: 0
#29
Heidi
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Maybe you should have planned accordingly for his birthday before you went camping. (But i like the comment ealier about just using the spam feature to the P/A email! )
Mar 4, 2008 at 2:37 pm rating: 1
#30
Mishee
Summer I am gonna agree with that…
Hence the reason I make a big stink about my birthday starting about Halloween…
With my day people either TOTALLY remember or TOTALLY forget… except my mother everyone seems to do the former…. so I make sure that doesn’t happen anymore!
Summer is right, he should’ve started talking about it when he saw Rebecca at Christmas.
Mar 4, 2008 at 3:05 pm rating: 0
#31
secondsout
Perhaps another response would be:
“Thank you for your informative email. Likewise, my birthday is September 1st. Mom’s birthday is July 30th. Dad’s birthday is March 9th. Mickey Mouse’s birthday is November 18th.”
Mar 4, 2008 at 3:26 pm rating: 8
#32
Mishee
sout – I love a person who goes to IMDB (or where ever you went – that’s where I went) for the right info!! and just think, this year he will be 80 years young!
go mickey!
p.s. is anyone else having issues with the “Reply to this Comment”? I can do it in Oxford, but not this thread…
p.p.s bacon is life.
Mar 4, 2008 at 3:31 pm rating: 0
#33
Karen
Well, Mishee – I was about to say, yes, we lost the add/reply for this thread – but apparently, secondsout still has it. I don’t.
And thanks for the bacon craving. Really, thanks.
Mar 4, 2008 at 3:53 pm rating: 0
#34
Mishee
hey, it’s better than
p.s. SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT
now if you get a shit craving that’s your own damn fault!!!
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:14 pm rating: 0
#35
bamBAM!!
Yo- welcome!
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:20 pm rating: 0
#36
Karen
Nope, but I sure don’t have that bacon craving anymore….ROFL
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:20 pm rating: 1
#37
bamBAM!!
that’s pretty punkass shit there.
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:23 pm rating: 3
#38
Amy
apparently no one’s seen this yet:
http://www.someecards.com/upload/birthday_n/what_i_ll_remember_most_about_my_birthday_is_that_you_forgot_it.html
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:23 pm rating: 0
#39
Nothanks
Well, today is my birthday. My mother came into my offices and asked how I was doing and then asked me to fax something for her. I did. She hopped up and said, “okay, I’m gonna go get grammah and take her to luch”. My dad called me and asked me if I wanted a burrito for lunch today. I said, “sure” thinking he remembered my birthday. He showed up @ 30 min later burrito in hand and talked about my brother and his new wife for the next 45 min. Again, no birthday wishes.
I don’t feel bad about it, I would rather people not make a big deal about my birthday.
Oh and my brother text messaged me
b-day
and my sister has yet to do anything. I’ll update this evening…
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:24 pm rating: 0
#40
Mishee
my father and I talked for about 20 minutes on my last b-day until he was trying to end the conversation and I kept saying “So, what’s up?” and it took about 3 times until he went “Oh yeah, happy birthday honey!”
Everyone has an excuse, EXCEPT parents (especially mothers, I’ve never given birth myself, but I hear it’s something that you just don’t really forget!)
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:26 pm rating: 0
#41
bamBAM!!
If one wanted to be really passive-aggressive, wouldn’t one write a letter resembling this one?:
Yesterday was my birthday, thanks so much!! I couldn’t believe that you remembered, but when you gave up all that precious time of yours to call me, wow!!! At 10 o’clock in the morning too!! I just wasn’t expecting a phone call, but wow, wow. I can’t freaking believe you remembered. Thank you, and I’m looking forward to the 100 dollar check you said would be coming.
Love, hugs, and hearts,
Your Brother
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:28 pm rating: 0
#42
Lurker
She should send him a .WAV file of the world’s tiniest synthesized violin.
By the way, yesterday was the anniversary of my cat’s neutering. Thanks a lot for all the cards and flowers.
Mar 4, 2008 at 4:47 pm rating: 2
#43
Yomama
You honor a person’s birthday out of respect to that person. How hard is it to send a card a few days before?
And Claw you went way to far with that line about Mary Mother of God. The site administrator should pull it.
Mar 4, 2008 at 5:00 pm rating: 2
#44
Quite Contrary
My brother would be more shocked if I remembered his birthday. Wait. That should read acknowledged his birthday.
Team Get Over It.
Mar 4, 2008 at 5:05 pm rating: 2
#45
tlyzer
So forgettable
That’s what you are
So forgettable
whether near or far
That’s why brother, it’s incredible
that someone who’s so forgettable
thinks that I would
remember his Birthday at all
Love (uh, not really),
Rebecca
Mar 4, 2008 at 10:02 pm rating: 5
#46
sarah hayley
You guys have the card right for the brother, but how about giving Rebecca some passive aggressive ammunition?
http://www.someecards.com/upload/birthday_n/sorry_you_didn_t_remind_me_it_was_your_birthday.html
Mar 5, 2008 at 1:16 am rating: 0
#47
Lerren
You know what? If you want to defuse the situation, seriously, just fire him a note that says !?!!! – the card didn’t get there?!?!!. Then it was lost by the mighty postal system. I’ll send another, and if the first one turns up, let me know.
Problem solved.
Mar 5, 2008 at 11:22 am rating: 1
#48
Chlor
He’s 11 years past the age where he should be expecting people to care. So the funny, ironic response to this should’ve been: “Grow up.”
Mar 6, 2008 at 9:33 am rating: 0
#49
Rebecca
I’m the Rebecca who submitted this – Thanks to everyone for their awesome comments. My brother is a huge jerk who just did this to make me feel bad and it worked for about 3 hours. Then I got over it and submitted it to the site
)
Mar 6, 2008 at 8:45 pm rating: 0
#50
Quite Contrary
3 hours?? You should have felt bad for no more than 3 seconds. And even that would be too much time.
Mar 6, 2008 at 8:51 pm rating: 0
#51 the fruitcake’s in the mail
[...] an occasion that blue mountain arts has yet to animate [...]
Apr 15, 2008 at 12:27 am rating: 0
#52 cloudy with a chance of hate mail | passive-aggressive (and just plain aggressive) notes
[...] related: an occasion that blue mountain arts has yet to animate [...]
Aug 14, 2008 at 8:18 pm rating: 0
#53
Woman on the Verge
This is exactly why I didn’t send you a card.
Love, Rebecca
Aug 17, 2008 at 12:37 pm rating: 0
#54 “i don’t need a birthday cake,” i said. | passive-aggressive (and just plain aggressive) notes
[...] an occasion that blue mountain arts has yet to animate extra credit: cake [...]
Sep 12, 2008 at 9:46 am rating: 0
#55
XRumerTest
Hello. And Bye.
Oct 7, 2008 at 4:57 pm rating: 0
#56
beinuounk
dude you know what I’m talking about! soy desole
Nov 21, 2008 at 1:46 am rating: 0
#57 you know, i’m getting input here that i’m reading as relatively hostile
[...] related: an occasion blue mountain arts has yet to animate [...]
Feb 1, 2009 at 4:34 pm rating: 0
#58
Meg
I want to see the follow up PAN
Feb 2, 2009 at 2:14 pm rating: 0
#59
Alicia
I love all this talk about birthdays because I really do hate birthdays. Someone above said it, and I agree, who gives a crap after you turn 21! Honestly! I don’t care that you were born 32 years ago. Why is that so much more special than two days ago when you were stil 31? Why do we have to celebrate this every year? People get so high and mighty on their birthday, like they are the only one in the whole world born on that day. I think society rears this. We shouldn’t make people feel so special on their birthdays. Ugh.
Feb 2, 2009 at 11:17 pm rating: 0
#60 but…but…i didn’t forget!
[...] an occasion that blue mountain arts has yet to animate extra credit: postcards from yo [...]
Mar 24, 2009 at 3:38 pm rating: 0
#61
name
wow. people actually use yahoo mail?
Jul 10, 2009 at 11:07 am rating: 1
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