marc in san francisco spotted this at a restaurant in the haight called all you knead (have fun with those puns, kids). i can certainly empathize, but after reading some of the reviews…well, maybe there’s a reason the tips aren’t so great.
related: a friendly tip from your waitress

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249 responses so far ↓
#1 Can't believe it,
I always go for 20% in the hopes of the next patron getting better service because of a better tip. People really need a guide for this?!?!
Mar 10, 2008 at 5:25 pm
#2 Uncle Hunty
Wow, we give shit service and still expect 10 percent?
We lucky customers aren’t worthy to be served by such gods of the plate transportation industry.
Mar 10, 2008 at 5:27 pm
#3 Sarah

They were doing so well until 10%. Here’s the real guide:
10%: Your service sucked, but I don’t want to be a jerk , so I’ll leave you slightly less than 15% and hope you don’t figure it out.
OR:
Moving a decimal place is the extent of my mathematical skills. Sorry.
5%: Your service sucked, but I don’t want to be a jerk. However, I am also cheap. I can’t blame it on my math skills, because halving 10% takes almost as much effort as calculating 15%.
A Penny: Look at me, I’m an asshole!
Mar 10, 2008 at 5:35 pm
#4 nothanks
I tip a minimum of 50% and a majority of the time tip 100%
I feel that by me tipping well, even if the service is bad, it may make the day better for the server and potentially make it better for another patron.
Mar 10, 2008 at 5:42 pm
#5 Writerrejected

How *do* you actually say “you suck and I hate you,” in French, I wonder. Anyone?
Mar 10, 2008 at 5:43 pm
#6 yaya
Since when is a patron required to tip more than 15%?
I am sorry your employer pays you peanuts, but you can’t expect every patron to make up the difference over the standard 15%.
Mar 10, 2008 at 5:50 pm
#7 anglophile

Go ahead, blame the foreigners if you want. But you know it’s really the locals stiffing you. Damn hippies!
Mar 10, 2008 at 5:57 pm
#8 Troy McClure

This system is broken & one of the things I like the least about visiting the US. “We’re only going to pay you half as much as we should, & rely on your customers’ whims for the remainder. So keep that smile plastered across your face! And a bit of cleavage might not go astray.” Creepy? Or a good business nodel, to be emulated by other up-and-coming industries?
Mar 10, 2008 at 6:11 pm
#9 Riva
I am a career waiter(tress I hate the different connotation on the words.) First, I only get mad at Americans who tip badly. They know better, and usually, I get pretty good tips from our Euro friends only because they’ve been treated like crap by passive-aggresive waiters before me who believe they will get a bad tip and that gives them the right to be an ass to the poor stinky butter-knife-on-the-salad-users.
To the posters before me, if you eat at restaurants who charge less than 20 dollars for an a la carte entree, tip as suggested above. If you are at a fine dining restaurant, you are expected to tip 20%, and if you don’t, you are showing your lot in life. It doesn’t really matter, though. Your waiter read you before your butt hit the seat and your napkin was placed in your lap.
Mar 10, 2008 at 6:15 pm
#10 Straightline

If you get 10% from me it definitely means you sucked. And if that happens, I no longer care if you think the problem is that I can’t do the math.
Mar 10, 2008 at 6:20 pm
#11 KittyPants
Considering how much the restaurant in question suxxxxx, a 0% tip would be fine. A talk with the manager would be a good idea too. Then again, the manager there sux as well, so that probably won’t work.
Mar 10, 2008 at 6:21 pm
#12 Canthz_B

God asks that you love him and asks for 10% in tithes. These servers want 10% when they rate hatred?
What balls!
Mar 10, 2008 at 6:28 pm
#13 Reno
We should make up our own PA cards to explain our tipping policy to wait staff as soon as we are seated. This way, they know the deal and can understand how we felt about the service. It takes the guesswork out of receiving a 5%…10%…etc. tip.
Mar 10, 2008 at 6:31 pm
#14 GVI

Oh damn, here we go again with all the cranky servers and advocates for tipping.
Mar 10, 2008 at 6:45 pm
#15 Canthz_B

I just have to ask why anyone would think that tipping well for poor service would result in better service for the next patron?
You have set the bar…poor service equals good tip. Tipping well for bad service encourages bad service by rewarding it.
Mar 10, 2008 at 7:03 pm