after a minor breakout, matt in toronto “borrowed” his roommate’s clinique cleanser…and then forgot to put it back where he found it. his (admirably direct) roommate asked if he’d mind not using her clinique products again in the future, seeing as it was, you know, pretty expensive and not that big of a container. “no problem,” matt said. crisis averted!
that is, until last week, when matt ran out of his own face wash. instead, he used his roommate’s (again) and then forgot to put it back where he found it (again). the next day, when matt went to use her cleanser again (after forgetting to stop at the store to buy his own) he found this little clinique bonus.
matt’s mea culpa: “i shouldn’t have been using her products in the first place, especially after she asked me the first time. i’ll just make sure i never run out of anything ever again!”
related: is nothing sacred?

reddit!
stumble it!
104 responses so far ↓
#1 unholyghost2003

ooooooh! Lovin’ the PA “First” Reference when one is a first commenter Oh Pan Goddess!
Moving on, WOW I think this is the first healthy roommate relationship we have seen one here! Congrats Matt & Roommate you EACH win a years supply of Clinique face wash!
Mar 12, 2008 at 9:31 pm rating: +1 
#2 brinkofacomplex

Matt gets points for realizing what a dick he is, but that in itself doesn’t make him less of one.
Mar 12, 2008 at 9:32 pm rating: 0 
#3 Canthz_B

Team don’t use my toiletries.
Especially if mine are Clinique and you usually buy Suave!
Mar 12, 2008 at 9:40 pm rating: +3 
#4 Canthz_B

It’s not the size of the zit.
It’s the potion in the lotion.
Mar 12, 2008 at 9:46 pm rating: 0 
#5 Canthz_B

I do love the generic nail clippers slumming with the Clinique products! No red-lining in that medicine cabinet.
Mar 12, 2008 at 9:54 pm rating: +1 
#6 PassionateCliniquer
I’m wondering why his roommate is using the Clarifying lotion #2 and make up remover for dry skin and acne potions that are for oily skin?
Increase that exfoliation honey!
Mar 12, 2008 at 10:24 pm rating: 0 
#7 Detective Julie
I don’t see how she can afford all her face products in the first place! Maybe she works at the Clinique counter.
Mar 12, 2008 at 10:37 pm rating: 0 
#8 raiseyourglass
He should just stick to borrowing the deodorant, pumace stone and toothbrush.
Mar 12, 2008 at 10:41 pm rating: 0 
#9 Sarah

This facial cleanser ain’t big enough for the both of us.
Mar 12, 2008 at 11:07 pm rating: 0 
#10 Chlor

I’m kind of obsessive compulsive about squeezing the contents of the product to the bottom of the tube. Plus she has bad penmanship.
Screw her.
Mar 12, 2008 at 11:19 pm rating: 0 
#11 RALPHY
I notice just above the sign, there appears to be a bullet embedded in the wood. Just maybe Roomy has taken care of the problem. A bit harsh maybe, but it would tend to solve the problem.
Mar 12, 2008 at 11:51 pm rating: +2 
#12 secondsout

Did Matt borrow her nail polish, lipstick, and eyeliner, too?
Mar 13, 2008 at 12:14 am rating: 0 
#13 Tobi
When you can an entire set of name brand personal care products there is no such thing as “not being able to afford” anything. Tell her to stop complaining.
Mar 13, 2008 at 1:59 am rating: 0 
#14 thatlittlemonkey
This is why I live alone. Whose overpriced face wash is this? Oh it’s my overpriced face wash.
Mar 13, 2008 at 3:43 am rating: +2 
#15 claw71

Matt:
I regret to inform you that you have been penalized the balance of your man points. You are not eligible for any man rehabilitation programs. Please forward your ball sack to the nearest man repository so it can be cleaned and given to a man who actually needs it.
Sincerely,
The Council of Masculinity
Mar 13, 2008 at 5:37 am rating: +3 
#16 muddgirl
Team “If you’re out of face wash then don’t wash your face”.
Mar 13, 2008 at 7:20 am rating: 0 
#17 claw71

Matt’s Song (to the tune of I feel Pretty)
Matt’s a sissy, a big sissy
he feels pretty and witty and bright
and he’s too cheap to buy face wash tonight
He’s so smarmy, I said smarmy
It’s alarming for him to steal
A woman’s beauty products in little bottles teal
See that fresh faced boy in the mirror there
who can that girlish boy be?
Such a pretty face, get that guy a dress
Such nutless wuss, Matt’s not a man, you see.
Matt’s such a sissy, a big ol’ sissy
he loves to do such girlish things
He’s trading in his nut sack for napkins with wings.
Mar 13, 2008 at 7:43 am rating: +5 
#18 GhostWriter

The note found in Matt’s roommate’s dresser read: “I’m sorry Matt, I can’t afford for both of us to wear Victoria’s Secret panties…tx
Mar 13, 2008 at 7:55 am rating: +5 
#19 KittyKat
She better guard her tampons. There’s no telling what Matt would do with those.
Mar 13, 2008 at 8:38 am rating: +1 
#20 thatlittlebroad
Team Brillo pad and soft scrub.
Mar 13, 2008 at 8:39 am rating: 0 
#21 Clint Eastwood
I know what you’re thinking: Should I risk dry skin and use body wash, or steal some of her facial scrub?
Seeing as how it reduces the appearance of fine lines as it exfoliates dead skin clean off, you’ve got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel oily?
Well, do you, punk?
Mar 13, 2008 at 8:57 am rating: +3 
#22 Mishee

I don’t blame her at all! Clinique is NOT cheap stuff!!
Men should use soap - Lava soap if possible, or maybe Borax… but I always get a giggle when Mr. Mishee uses my apricot face wash in the shower… but it makes his skin so soft I don’t care for long!!!
Mar 13, 2008 at 9:58 am rating: +1 
#23 EvilTwin
I’m sorry Matt, I can’t loan you my Prada bag for that function you have tomorrow night…even though it looks way better with that little Vera Wang number you’re wearing than with my Dior.
thx.
Mar 13, 2008 at 10:10 am rating: 0 
#24 KittyKat
I’m sorry, Matt, I can’t afford for both of us to use my toilet paper, so I’d prefer if you would go around smelling like shit. Or if you like, you can wipe your ass with this note.
thx.
Mar 13, 2008 at 10:37 am rating: +1 
#25 nix
Sorry, Matt, I’m with the roommate - Clinique is kind of expensive! Get her a gift certificate for them.
Mar 13, 2008 at 11:08 am rating: 0 
#26 claw71

Matt’s taking a beating here but he deserves it. He repeatedly used her products even though she asked him not to. The fact that he forgot to put the cleanser back afterusing it indicates premeditation on his part. He was hoping to get away with it.
The fact is Matt never intended to buy his own, he figured he could pilfer his roomie’s for free. I’m glad we revoked his man card. I only hope women reject his application too.
Let him be without gender: A pimply humanoid thing with no genitalia and no home… just an unhealthy streak of vanity, a lust for women’s toiletries and complete disregard for human decency.
Mar 13, 2008 at 11:53 am rating: +2 
#27 Pepelope
So easy to fix it… It may not be right but it is understandable that Matt used once or twice a little bit of something that did not belonged to him. They share a household, what the heck!
But of course, the roommate has all the right to be annoyed, specially because she does not know how often this has happened.
Matt should buy a new tube of clinique cleanser and a bunch of flowers, write a nice apology note explaining he used the product only in the two occasions he misplaced it because his own facewash was over, acknowledge he made something to upset her, and promise he would never do it again because from now on he would always have an extra bottle of his own facewash, and buy a new one when the extra was opened.
By the way, that’s what civilized people do with all toiletries and foodstuffs that don’t spoil too quickly, like sugar, flour and butter.
Mar 13, 2008 at 12:33 pm rating: +1