Writes an anonymous New Yorker: “Our neighbors hate us because we are the youngest in the building. Thus, any malfunction that occurs in the building results in notes directed towards us. And yes, this note was a follow-up to another note (seen at left) also directed at us.”
Happy St. Patrick’s Day, kids!
related: infinite note project

73 responses so far ↓
#1
claw71
Oh, the GREEN door. I thought you’d said screen.
Mar 17, 2008 at 7:26 am rating: 7
#2
fantasy
“”STEEERRIKE THREE YOU’RE OUT!!”
Mar 17, 2008 at 7:32 am rating: 1
#3
park rose
Maybe the number of notes has a symbiotic relation with how many times the door is left open. Before the red-penned note was put up, there were 3 notes (view the photo large). Now that a 4th note has been put up, the door needs to be left open one more time, then a new note appears.
Mar 17, 2008 at 7:32 am rating: 0
#4
The Neighbors
It’s not that we’re old and grouchy. We don’t hate our new neighbors because they’re young. The problem is that they’re stupid, inconsiderate and apparently illiterate. Close the fucking door! It’s cold and more importantly this is New York City! There are robbers, rapists and Jehova’s Witnesses running around out there looking for an open door.
Mar 17, 2008 at 7:43 am rating: 7
#5
Drunkbunny
Why would you think the note was directed at you, unless you are the ones leaving the door open? There’s nothing that says, “HEY YOUNG PEOPLE” so methinks it’s your guilty conscience that is causing you to think the note-leaving effort was inspired by you. So hey, just shut the door. It takes much less effort than, say, photographing the notes and sending them in to a website.
Mar 17, 2008 at 7:43 am rating: 3
#6
claw71
As stupid as these notes are, not pulling the door shut is worse. Hopefully Karma’s paying attention when those rape-happy Jehova’s Witnesses sneak in.
Mar 17, 2008 at 7:47 am rating: 4
#7
se
It is a magic door. If left open, it turns into a jar.
Mar 17, 2008 at 7:59 am rating: 4
#8
anglophile
The added weight of all those notes on the outside of the door is making it harder to pull the door closed. They need to post a corresponding number of notes on the inside as well, just to balance things out.
Mar 17, 2008 at 8:16 am rating: 4
#9
GhostWriter
Installing a hydraulic door closer would be cheaper than the heating bill spikes.
Team The-Right-Tool-For-The-Job
Mar 17, 2008 at 8:18 am rating: 4
#10
kelmeister
Hey! I want to know what’s BEHIND THE GREEN DOOR.
Mar 17, 2008 at 8:27 am rating: 1
#11
amy d
How do they know it’s been left open exactly 3 times since the first note was posted?
Has someone been appointed to be the door-watcher? And if som can’t they just shut the door securely whilst on post?
Mar 17, 2008 at 8:29 am rating: 1
#12
claw71
I used to live with Jesus Christ and he left the door open all the time. On the rare occasion he closed it he’d immediately open a window. I got tired of it and left a note on the door. It read: Why is it so hard to keep the door closed? Were you born in a barn? Of course the smart ass couldn’t resist scribbling “yes” at the bottom of the note.
I know, the whole water into wine thing is cool but it was always cheap wine. He couldn’t turn water into a nice Shiraz or a Malbec. It was always an acidic Merlot that could have used more time on the vine.
Mar 17, 2008 at 8:37 am rating: 11
#13
Katzndogz
You haven’t been raped and stabbed until you’ve been raped and stabbed in New York.
(inside joke)
Mar 17, 2008 at 8:39 am rating: 0
#14
Strideo
when all else fails, post more notes!
Mar 17, 2008 at 8:57 am rating: 0
#15
GhostWriter
Pull Shut the Green Door
Moody Blues sing-along link
worth the click regardless
A wonderful day for casting my blame.
An open green door, three times before
Do you mind -
Closing the green door again my friend?
Such a long Winter blows a brisk wind.
Dollars from heat are blowing away.
Notes that you’ll read, you’re going to pay
Can ya-
Pull shut the green door again my friend?
Such a long Winter blows a brisk wind.
They tell us that you’re teens, a long-ago, forgotten time.
Our memories have vanished; too sad.
A wonderful day for casting my blame.
An open green door, three times before
Do you mind -
Closing the green door again my friend?
Such a long Winter blows a brisk wind.
Mar 17, 2008 at 9:04 am rating: 1
#16
Nathaniel
Why do you think either note is directed at you, and where does either note mention age? You’re either incredibly narcissistic, or you have a guilty conscience.
Mar 17, 2008 at 9:08 am rating: 0
#17
GhostWriter
Isn’t it weird how the first note on the right actually came from a fortune cookie? I’ve heard of people playing lucky lottery numbers off their fortunes, but antagonizing fellow tenants based on a fortune’s direction is too much!
…reminds me of the Twilight Zone episode where Will Shatner was transfixed by a cafe ‘s penny fortune machine.
Mar 17, 2008 at 9:38 am rating: 0
#18
claw71
How about a little Crossfade? To the tune of Cold…
Looking back at me I see
that I never really shut the door
I never stopped to pull it hard
I’m always walking in
with things under my chin
You left a note that I just walked right by
I’m acting like an asshole guy—iiiieee.
What I really want to say
is I’m sorry for the way…I am
I never meant to make it cold
I never meant to make it cold.
For you I’m sorry about all the flies
Maybe they come to the light
If only I could reach out and pull it shut
Then maybe I could see
You don’t hate me cause I’m the young guy
I’m just a jerk who won’t say hi—iiiieee
What I’d really like to say
Is I’m sorry for the way…I am
Leaving the door cracked makes it cold.
I never mean to make it cold
I never really wanted you to see
The selfish side of me, the creep
Who makes it hard for you to sleep
It’s always seems so hard for me
to pull the green door closed
I guess I really should have known
and that’s why I’m such a dope
I never meant to make it cold.
What I’d really like to say,
Is I’m sorry for the way…I am
I know I made the room cold
I never meant to make it cold.
Mar 17, 2008 at 10:06 am rating: 2
#19
claw71
You’re killing Anthony Grosso with your draft!
Thank you Terry.
Mar 17, 2008 at 10:36 am rating: 0
#20
Sarah
Well, damn, all this time I’ve been closing the magenta door. Who knew?
Mar 17, 2008 at 10:45 am rating: 2
#21
Meagan
Two things. Close the door and stop taking the name of Jesus in vain.
Mar 17, 2008 at 11:21 am rating: 1
#22
mere
what’s going on
behind the green door….
Mar 17, 2008 at 11:22 am rating: 0
#23
park rose
I think the neighbs’ are compulsive note-posters, and it is indeed something they need to do.
I wonder if the ‘last note’ is the tricksy little note on the right. Imagine the neighbs’ rubbing their hands together as they mull over their dastardly plot.
We’ll make the note small enough so that they can’t see it, then when they’ve left the door open 3 times we’ll be able to post this whopping red beauty with its nicely aligned masking tape on the door.
We know that half the residents are colourblind, so they won’t be able to see red print, especially near a green background. Then when the door has been left open another few times, we’ve got the message hobbytex(t)ed onto a bit of black felt. After that…
Mar 17, 2008 at 11:36 am rating: 1
#24
Mishee
Maybe the door got left open inadvertently when a resident came home late and ended up regurgitating to no extent somewhere outside..
Once I regurgitate to no extent, pulling a door closed behind me is the last thing on my mind!
Mar 17, 2008 at 12:41 pm rating: 1
#25
Summer
The second note is in scary, angry red ink, coincidence? I think not.
Mar 17, 2008 at 1:39 pm rating: 0
#26
Centaurea
Eventually they will just keep scooting the notes over until they tape over the doorway.
Mar 17, 2008 at 1:47 pm rating: 2
#27
damon
That actually looked like a follow up note to the follow up note to the original note way in the left hand corner. Fucking amazing. I wanna know what that small strip of paper says though.
Mar 17, 2008 at 2:27 pm rating: 0
#28
Lurker
Here’s an oldie from the
BeatlesHeatles:Close the door and I’ll kiss you,
Then pass me a tissue;
It’s cold and we’ve all got the flu.
And when you go away,
Close the door every day,
Or I’ll send all my heat bills to you.
All my heat bills I will send to you.
All my heat bills, ’cause the’re overdue.
Both the kids and the seniors,
Say, “Please shut the green door,
Or we’ll send all our heat bills to you.
Mar 17, 2008 at 2:53 pm rating: 1
#29
Crash
I’ll bet it’s the building poltergeist…
You know how they like to make a lot of noise and break things all the time,
with the occasional haunting here and there…
It can’t be the noisy youngsters that come in late every night and have the wild parties without inviting anyone, that’s not rational.
Mar 17, 2008 at 3:13 pm rating: 1
#30
secondsout
The last two or three notes clearly haven’t worked. You know what might work? Another note! Yes, that’s the ticket!
Mar 17, 2008 at 3:15 pm rating: 1
#31
Heidi
My Bad! I’m color blind! I didn’t even KNOW there was a door!
Mar 17, 2008 at 3:35 pm rating: 0
#32
TygerAKC
Carly Simon anyone?
You walked into the appartment and you forgot to close the green door.
You young people have no idea,
What a doorknob is for.
I’ve been keeping track since the last note and you’ve left it open thrice!
You better start keepin’ the green door shut,
the green door shut….
You’re so vain,
You probably think this note is for you.
You’re so vain,
I bet you think this note is for you.
Don’t you? Don’t you?
Mar 17, 2008 at 4:20 pm rating: 3
#33
Epiphany
Paranoid much? or maybe dyslexia?…. color blind?…hmm I think you should be more concerned if they put the note on your apartment door directly… It’s not like the UPS guy really knows to shut the green door all the way… I mean HE doesn’t live there too does he?
Mar 17, 2008 at 4:41 pm rating: 0
#34
Canthz_B
CLOSE THAT DOOR!!
XXX Things happen…
Behind the Green Door!
Mar 17, 2008 at 4:46 pm rating: 0
#35
Suhayla
Okay, seriously, is the green door next to a door of another colour? If not, that repeated reference to the colour of the door is not just bizarre, but frightening.
Mar 17, 2008 at 5:57 pm rating: 1
#36
Writer, Rejection
El puerto verde.
Mar 17, 2008 at 6:18 pm rating: 0
#37
Canthz_B
Maybe your neighbors are angry because, as the youngest tenants, you have the cheesiest shit to steal when the burglars waltz in through the open green door.
If you had more than milk crate furniture to protect you’d be more responsible.
Mar 17, 2008 at 6:59 pm rating: 1
#38
Canthz_B
Close The Door. Thanks Teddy Pendergrass…I miss those 8-tracks, oh, but did they work miracles?!
Close the door,
Let me reiterate, it’s the green door.
Baby I have so many notes to write,
And I wanna write ‘em all to you.
Close the door,
Let’s leave it open no more.
Let’s pull the knob till the tab clicks in,
Or it’s me and you now.
I’ve waited all day long,
Just to get you in my palms.
And it’s exactly like I want it to be,
Me punching you,
And you begging me.
Close the door.
Let me kick your back low and make it sore.
Come on get closer and close so I can work my knee,
I’m tired of you, Brother.
Come here youngblood!
I’ve waited all day long,
Just to get you in my palms.
And it’s exactly like I want it to be,
Me punching you,
And you begging me.
Close the door, neighbor,
And let me speak my mind.
A verbal bludgeon through the night,
And then again, and then again,
When the morning comes.
Come here, neighbor!
Come here, neighbor,
Let me brake your nose,
Let me do,
What I’m wont to do.
Let me put whoop ass on you, neighbor!
Mar 17, 2008 at 10:38 pm rating: 0
#39
Lurker
In New York, where the winters are chilly
(Much colder than Pittsburgh or Philly),
I left the door open,
And now I am hopin’
My neighbors don’t gang up and kill me.
Mar 18, 2008 at 7:14 am rating: 0
#40
Jerke Wadde
Notes to “close the door” piss me off. Uh, if you want the door to close completely, fix the fucking hydraulics on the door, cheapskate!
Mar 26, 2008 at 3:16 pm rating: 0
#41
Andy
This sign needs to be designed like the McDonald’s main sign… where they have the counter that shows how many hamburgers they’ve sold.
Just put a little wheel with numbers on the back of the sign, and you’d be set. If you’re going to be crazy, might as well enjoy it.
Apr 7, 2008 at 4:49 am rating: 2
Comments are Closed