while you were drunk-texting your latest eugene mirman sighting to all your pals, more industrious folk like bryan from minneapolis, betsy from l.a., and adele from montreal were documenting the champagne of comedic gold served up by the austin bartenders.

related: reporting not-exactly-live from sxsw









118 responses so far ↓
#1
PeeWee

What bar in Austin doesn’t have Shiner?
Mar 17, 2008 at 9:42 pm rating: +1 
#2
leelou

Better yet, what bar in Austin sends handwritten iPhone messages?
Mar 17, 2008 at 9:47 pm rating: +5 
#3
Troy McClure

“‘Scuse me, I don’t want to trouble you;
I’d sure like a drink that has bubbles! You
have any cheap?”
Read ‘em and weep.
But welcome to SXSW.
Love the guy lurking threateningly in the background of the last photo. “This arm’s taken a lot of pain, & it’s ready to give it all back.”
Mar 17, 2008 at 9:59 pm rating: +2 
#4
Crash

I want the “EV(WTF?)RYTH,Na” that’s special in the first note…
Since they ran outt’a the “FUCK,Na DRINK SPECIALS”…
Mar 17, 2008 at 10:11 pm rating: +2 
#5
Canthz_B

I get a special drink for NOT fucking in this bar?
Mar 17, 2008 at 11:09 pm rating: +1 
#6
Canthz_B

Texas has reached the 21st century. In the old days sign two would have said “No faggots served here!”
Yeah, not, PC…but you know it would have said that. Don’t blame me, buy a funny bone!
Mar 17, 2008 at 11:14 pm rating: +2 
#7
Canthz_B

Looks like Troy McClure took exception to the tip jar in picture three and “tipped” the Diet Coke sign on its ear instead!
Mar 17, 2008 at 11:18 pm rating: 0 
#8
Sarah

Sure. Everything is special. I bet they told you your kids were special too. Just keep on believing that.
Mar 17, 2008 at 11:52 pm rating: 0 
#9
Tyler

Hmm, since everything is bigger in Texas, does that mean their lack of tips is bigger? (Hence the large tip jar)
Mar 18, 2008 at 1:51 am rating: +1 
#10
Sussanah

Cheers Mate is very Australian.
Mar 18, 2008 at 2:10 am rating: 0 
#11
tom

Which is why SXSW sucks. It’s held in Texas, the least friendly, most disgusting shit hole in the USA.
Mar 18, 2008 at 3:23 am rating: 0 
#12
Nicolas

“Cheers mate” isn’t an acceptable tip anywhere. However, not tipping is a-OK in most civilised countries. FU right back, Texas
Mar 18, 2008 at 4:56 am rating: +2 
#13
Lurker

Again with the tipping?!?
Jezz, if you have to ask for the tips, yer doin’ it wrong.
Mar 18, 2008 at 7:06 am rating: +4 
#14
claw71

So I suppose an Apple-tini is out of the question then…No Shiner? Then I’d like a Great Lakes Burning River Pale Ale.
Welcome to Texas, the worldwide capital of overcompensation. Nobody from Texas admits to being gay but you don’t want to be the first one to pass out around the bonfire.
Yeah, your ass is sore but it isn’t from riding a horse.
Mar 18, 2008 at 7:10 am rating: +2 
#15
claw71

Everything is special.
Including the mongoloid who scrawled that note. Corky’s bitter because his career never took off after Life Goes on. Stupid Sean Penn plays a better retard than he does.
Mar 18, 2008 at 7:14 am rating: 0 
#16
claw71

My tip? It’s to the guy in the back:
Get a bigger shirt, you ET looking freak.
Mar 18, 2008 at 7:20 am rating: 0 
#17
Tom

Here’s a tip mate - stock the right stuff and take down the signs!
Mar 18, 2008 at 7:54 am rating: +1 
#18
dizzy

What’s shiner?
BTW “cheers mate” isn’t a chavy thing to say (the very word chav makes my skin crawl…) it’s a fairly standard informal response in the UK to someone getting you a drink, sandwich or similar.
Mar 18, 2008 at 7:55 am rating: 0 
#19
Vampira

Shiner is yummy but it’s hard keeping up with demand for Shiner by 1,000,000 out of towners with attitudes.
And Texas is far friendlier than say…..New York and far cleaner than Mississippi and Lousiana (just for example!).
Also, tipping is not a city in China.
Mar 18, 2008 at 8:35 am rating: 0