Finding funny-haha Engrish signs in Japan is almost too easy, but Biella from New York didn’t settle for cheap laughs during her trip. “Your English is good,” one might say, but this club’s “advisory” about the Tokyo police is pure paranoiac gold.
extra credit: Uniformed vigilantes patrol tokyo streets to intimidate slackers [boingboing.net]
58 responses so far ↓
#1
Katie
Team Slacker Cops!
Mar 30, 2008 at 8:26 pm rating: 90
#2
anglophile
Hope the policemen don’t know English and can’t read the sign!
Mar 30, 2008 at 8:30 pm rating: 90
#3
Wade
I hate it when policemen pat roll.
Mar 30, 2008 at 8:39 pm rating: 90
#4
Suhayla
Don’t. Trust. ANYONE. Especially today.
Mar 30, 2008 at 8:40 pm rating: 90
#5
Troy McClure
I want to get a job in the Tokyo police, so I can have more time to spend on PAN.
Mar 30, 2008 at 8:42 pm rating: 90
#6
Crash
Damn…I knew that little ol’ crippled lady looked suspicious….
How many pat rolls has she been through anyway ?
Mar 30, 2008 at 9:02 pm rating: 90
#7
Sary
Just wanted to point out, “Your English Is Good” is a song by Tokyo Police Club. Funny coincidence that that phrase and the words ‘club’ and ‘tokyo police’ are all in the same sentence :]
Mar 30, 2008 at 9:18 pm rating: 90
#8
Canthz_B
Pat deserved to be rolled. She used to steal wallets and other stuffs.
Mar 30, 2008 at 9:35 pm rating: 90
#9
Canthz_B
Today’s crime rate may be skyrocketing, but that’s just an afternoon delight.
Mar 30, 2008 at 9:38 pm rating: 90
#10
Crash
Slackers disguising themselves as police men so that they can roll Pat and steal her wallet…
Mar 30, 2008 at 9:48 pm rating: 90
#11
Writerrejected
The paranoia of everyone around you possibly being a thief does deserve your “attention.” And stuffs.
Mar 30, 2008 at 10:00 pm rating: 90
#12
Beth
I’ve been described as a slacker. Does that mean I’m really a Tokyo cop? I do love the sushi.
Mar 30, 2008 at 10:23 pm rating: 90
#13
Nate
who taught them to cut their words up like that? pat-rolling? It took me 10 minutes to figure out what they were trying to say
Mar 30, 2008 at 10:27 pm rating: 90
#14
Suhayla
maybe ‘pat’ is another word for spliff… which may explain why they’re such slackers. hmm.
Mar 30, 2008 at 10:41 pm rating: 90
#15
Chipmunk
Oh, it’s nothing to worry about. They don’t want my actual attention, they want my “attention”. Which, of course, means they want me to pay attention to it sarcastically.
Okay SURE, Tokyo, I’ll DEFINITELY watch my stuffs.
Mar 30, 2008 at 10:45 pm rating: 90
#16
TuesdayPillow
I’m a little confused – they are “just slackers”? Does that mean they slack off in a fair and equitable manner or that they are merely slackers?
Someone please clarify this, as my eyes are bleeding in bewilderment.
Mar 30, 2008 at 10:57 pm rating: 90
#17
amy d
Today’s crime rate is skyrocketing!!!
Maybe so but everyone knows that the sun will come out tomorrow. Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow, there’ll be sun.
And with that, you can not accuse me of being a Pollyanna.
Mar 31, 2008 at 8:08 am rating: 90
#18
GhostWriter
I walked into the village tavern, intending to recruit a high-level Cleric for our quest, but everyone around me turned out to be a thief, and I lost my +3 ring of speed to a pickpocket because the knights patrolling the area are just slackers.
RIP Gary Gygax
Mar 31, 2008 at 8:35 am rating: 90
#19
JPav
I knew Pat Rolling and you, officer, are no Pat Rolling.
Mar 31, 2008 at 9:00 am rating: 90
#20
park rose
P.A. trolling – from one glorious thread to the next.
Mar 31, 2008 at 9:05 am rating: 90
#21
GhostWriter
Upon closer inspection, the blue highlighting is as intricate as an ancient Japanese ivory carving.
Mar 31, 2008 at 10:35 am rating: 90
#22
GhostWriter
After the record is over, you may look at anything you like…
…but just for the record, keep them on your wallet.
Mar 31, 2008 at 10:40 am rating: 90
#23
momoff19904
That’s pretty bad.
Mar 31, 2008 at 10:46 am rating: 90
#24
dan
this is actually an old trick by pickpockets. they put up a sign saying “watch your wallets” and then sit near the sign. they casually watch people walk by and upon seeing the sign, reach for their wallets to make sure the wallets are still safe, at the same time showing the pickpocket watching exactly where they keep their wallets in the first place, so they can easily rob them later. also, tourists are the best, which is clearly the target of this little caper. not to assume the store knows about it, the thief probably asked to put the sign up…
Mar 31, 2008 at 11:07 am rating: 90
#25
unholyghost2003
For me the best bit is that the crime rate in English speaking counties (esp. in major metropolitan areas) is vastly higher than Tokyo. So while it could be supposed that an English language sign is aimed at people from English speaking countries, I think most native English speakers in a major metropolitan area would be pleasantly surprised by the realization that if they ARE unfortunate enough to be victims of street crime it is just their wallet being discretely lifted from their pocket without the application of sharp knives or waving guns.
I suppose my point is, the Yakuza not withstanding, even crime is more polite there yet the Japanese are so appalled by what is considered a matter of course in the English speaking West, they feel the need to post signs stating what is obvious to westerners: i.e. when wandering in a densely packed metropolitan area, keep an eye on your wallet.
Mar 31, 2008 at 11:15 am rating: 90
#26
Freelance Guru
Wow. now i totally feel safe. I like the idea of a just slacker.
Mar 31, 2008 at 12:51 pm rating: 90
#27
Heidi
Mar 31, 2008 at 1:38 pm rating: 90
#28
Kittycat
“Everyone around you could turn out to be a thief . . .” Does that mean when they grow up they’ll turn out to be a thief? Is that a dream held by Japanese youth?
Mar 31, 2008 at 4:39 pm rating: 90
#29
mamason
Where’s the haiku when we need one?
Mar 31, 2008 at 8:02 pm rating: 90
#30
Troy McClure
Local cops are just
Though sadly unvigilant.
Whither my wallet?
Mar 31, 2008 at 8:36 pm rating: 90
#31
Olivia
Ha ha. I wonder what the good ol’ men in uniform thought after reading that.
Apr 1, 2008 at 2:27 pm rating: 90
#32 so if i start selling drugs i can drive an escalade, too?
[...] related: tokyo police club [...]
Nov 19, 2008 at 8:33 pm rating: 90
#33
Troy
Lacks orthographical faults
Not found here lest one counts breaks
Of which I do not.
Dec 3, 2008 at 2:00 am rating: 90
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