Some dating advice

May 16th, 2008 · 156 comments

Here, a break-up note too long for a text message…though that might have a been more (fucking) appropriate.

If you're going to have naked pics of your ex on your phone, you might not want to make them your background pic + LEAVE YOUR PHONE OPEN WHILE YOU SHOWER! I am going for a walk + you better be the FUCK out of my apt by the time I get back. You're a fucking DOUCHE -- SHE'S FUCKING FAT! WTF?

related: you oughta know

FILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · breakup · Cleveland · ex drama · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · more aggressive than passive


156 responses so far ↓

  • #1   park rose bang

    Passive-aggressive breakup. Him, not her.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:34 pm   rating: 127  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Freddie

      Yes. This.

      May 16, 2008 at 2:24 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   S

    wow! that is one heck of a break up note, thats not passive aggressive that’s just aggressive! Rightfully so, you give it to him sista!

    May 16, 2008 at 1:35 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   Nate Sheets

    But she has wonderful grammar!

    May 16, 2008 at 1:36 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   zchamu bang

    Excellent layout of the note – filled the whole page without overcrowding. Also, lovely handwriting. 9.2.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   aaa

      I almost want to start dating somebody and then have them do something really shitty so I can attempt to write a note as PA (or just A) -tastic as this and become internet famous.

      May 16, 2008 at 3:09 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Nico

    ZING

    May 16, 2008 at 1:37 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   DANIAN UGLE

      Would you be interested in a polygamous relationship where more than one woman is involved? I also am interested very much in women who are sexually uninhibited and forward as nudity and sensuality are valuable areas to explore as this makes the relationship far more pleasurable as I just would anticipate being relaxed and comfortable in the presence of women as I don’t at all enjoy being a stiff and would like you assisting me with this fact. Would be interested in a foursome as I like to be sexually free and open and do not mind having more than one woman with me at any time for that extra edge!

      Mar 19, 2009 at 2:13 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Mishee bang

    Yeah, well YOU have cellulite on your thighs, and you can’t suck a dick to save your life you fucking whore! Why do you think I left the phone OPEN?

    May 16, 2008 at 1:38 pm   rating: 40  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   jarvis

    She’s a better woman than I am. I would have sent those pics to his entire address book while he showered.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:42 pm   rating: 87  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   Nathaniel

      Yeah, that would have really showed him, guys get totally ostracized when people find out they have naked pictures of college girls they’ve fucked.

      I’m sorry, I meant lionized, not ostracized.

      May 16, 2008 at 3:01 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   Cady

      I’d have flushed the phone. Double whammy.

      May 16, 2008 at 5:17 pm   rating: 34  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.3   Zsa

      yeah but Moms and sisters and other ex-girlfriends can get pretty nasty about pics like that. source: note pictured above.

      and you KNOW he’s still got all the exes on speed dial (except maybe this one)

      May 16, 2008 at 6:20 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.4   blahblah

      How does this punish HIM? Better to take a picture of him while he showers and then send THAT to his address book. :)

      May 20, 2008 at 3:37 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.5   Charlotte

      Yeah, let’s completely humiliate the EX for something the note-writer’s current boyfriend did. That’ll show him! Shaming ex-girlfriends whom they may not even be friends with anymore is always the perfect form of revenge against guys.

      May 26, 2008 at 2:26 am   rating: 33  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   amy d bang

    He’s a douche. She’s fat. Put ‘em together you get a fat douche. Want some, anyone?

    May 16, 2008 at 1:43 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Total Douche bang

      Hey, Fat Douche is my brother! And he told me, “if that’s Amy, tell her I said ‘hi’.”

      May 17, 2008 at 2:58 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   amy d bang

      Oh, I still have dreams about that big galoot :)

      May 17, 2008 at 8:17 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   KW

    Wow. They’re both douches; team nobody.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:44 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   Tyler bang

    Hmm, I don’t know. Where did we get a hold of this PA note? I don’t know if I quite believe it…even though there have been plenty of them which seem impossible, ie- Dressing room=restroom, porn movies in elevators, etc, I still don’t know how I feel about this one.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:44 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Quite Contrary bang

      Oh it’s real. And it’s fantastic.

      May 16, 2008 at 1:47 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   sarah hayley

      I don’t know if the PA notes about not using a dressing room as a restroom are real, but it’s happened before. I worked in a bookstore last summer and the employees from the clothing store next door came by one day and told us that someone had taken a dump in one of the dressing rooms.

      May 16, 2008 at 1:53 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   nerdabilly

      The dressing room = restroom thing is totally real. My wife worked in department stores for years and was always coming home with stories about how people used the dressing rooms as restrooms. To this day she won’t take her shoes off in a public dressing room.

      May 16, 2008 at 2:14 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.4   Tyler bang

      Oh, I don’t doubt the dressing room commode, I just don’t know about this one ;)

      May 16, 2008 at 2:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.5   Total Douche bang

      You know, before I finished reading 10.2, the first thought that popped into my head was, what the hell is a bookstore doing with dressing rooms?!?
      Did this happen to anyone else, just curious?

      May 17, 2008 at 3:07 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.6   Ashley

      @ 10.5–Yes. I was getting a little perplexed until I got to where the clothing store worker came in.

      And that’s disgusting.

      May 17, 2008 at 3:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.7   sarah hayley

      Once, in said bookstore, a kid didn’t make it to the bathroom in time and shit straight out his shorts onto the carpet. There’s your taking a dump on the floor of a bookstore story :)

      May 19, 2008 at 1:52 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.8   Queen V bang

      I used to work at a tanning salon, and this social phenom was all too common for my liking.

      May 19, 2008 at 10:09 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   RunBarbara bang

    I told him to erase those pics after I sent them, I knew she would be jealous.
    And you would be fat, too, if you just had his baby. WTF.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:45 pm   rating: 63  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   Quite Contrary bang

    I think she might be a little upset. But she does have lovely handwriting.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:45 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   john

    naked fat chicks have no business having their pictures on someone’s cell phone. i blame her.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:47 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   RunBarbara bang

      I bet the fat chick is ten times hotter than the girlfriend. Her handwriting screams “anorexic control freak”. No one wants to fuck Skeletor.
      NO ONE.

      May 16, 2008 at 1:48 pm   rating: 50  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   claw71 bang

      More cushion for the pushin’

      May 16, 2008 at 1:56 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.3   Panthor

      Alright wtf. Skeletor is huge. Look at him: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Skeletor-spoo.jpg

      He’s ripped. He’s got more mass than Bruce Lee. Everyone wants to fuck skeletor.

      May 16, 2008 at 4:18 pm   rating: 40  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.4   cre8tivewmn

      Skeletor is definitely not cushiony, though.

      May 16, 2008 at 4:28 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.5   Total Douche bang

      and the SPOO was Fucking Delicious!

      May 17, 2008 at 3:11 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   Quite Contrary bang

    I think this is what Sharpie means by “Writing out loud!”

    May 16, 2008 at 1:48 pm   rating: 46  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   amy d bang

      :lol:

      May 16, 2008 at 1:50 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   Epiphany

      Sounds like a new commercial.

      May 16, 2008 at 4:20 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   claw71 bang

    Hold on there people, why do we assume this note is from a woman?

    “Douche” is traditionally man vernacular. I’ve heard women toss the word around as an insult but they were the same sort of women who weren’t taken aback by the dreaded “c” word.

    This could be a situation where a bi-curious gentleman is having trouble making the committment to being a full-time butt pirate.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:56 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Quite Contrary bang

      What self respecting guy, butt pirate or not, has writing that nice? (Except for an architect, but they are all trained to write the same way.) And, trust me, more women than you know describe men as douches.

      May 16, 2008 at 2:10 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.2   Lo

      Yea, I’m a 23 y.o. woman & I’ve got to tell you that “DOUCHE” is all the rage now-a-days. I probably call a guy a douche at least 4 times a week, lol. That and dbag always works well…

      It’s a totally different vibe than the “c” word….

      May 16, 2008 at 2:29 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.3   aaa

      Quite Contrary, check out today’s thing on Found. The dude who wrote that card (evidently a gay anniversary card) has some fucking girly handwriting.

      http://www.foundmagazine.com/find/4274

      My question is who the fuck, gay man or not, uses a chihuahua greeting card for any purpose besides a satirical one?

      May 16, 2008 at 3:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.4   summer

      no, I disagree, my friends and I have no problem with the douche, the c word yeah, but douchebag is for girls, pun intended.

      May 16, 2008 at 4:12 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.5   Sarcastic Monkey

      Hehehe – he said “Butt Pirate”. Hehehe

      May 16, 2008 at 4:45 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.6   the great

      ahem.. this woman says Douche.. proudly! and im married.. and hetero.. so.. just to eliminate all those other options.. some chicks can just get away with that.. yanno? p.s. im 22.. so.. it could be a young new woman thing

      May 16, 2008 at 8:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.7   finkinthekink

      I know you!

      May 16, 2008 at 10:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.8   Alena

      I’m a chick and I use the words “douche” and “douchebag” all the time. I work at a country club, so I have daily occasion to say it. And I do. Some people think it’s funny, a minority act shocked. I don’t get the big deal.. the word “douche” is just a thing, it’s not even really a swear word. It’s arbitrarily silly, I mean, who would get offended if I called them a tampon? They’d be like, “What the hell does that mean?” Lastly, when you call someone a douche, the word takes a different, non-literal meaning. So, basically, I’m all for it.

      I don’t have a problem with the “c” word; however, I admit it is a bit shocking to hear in conversation. It sort of makes me stop for a second. What I like about it, though, is that I believe it to be currently the most powerful word in the English language. Even the “f” word doesn’t have quite the sting nor the shock value, especially with how much it gets bandied about these days. The “c” word is the last taboo. If you don’t believe me, drop it in conversations and watch how *everyone* reacts. It’s kind of amusing. ;)

      May 18, 2008 at 12:27 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   pry

    that’s nicer than it should have been.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:57 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   claw71 bang

    Baby, baby, baby…You got it all wrong…those are pictures of my mom.

    May 16, 2008 at 1:58 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   RunBarbara bang

      I had naked pictures of my Mom on my cell phone. I only deleted them because I missed her so much that they made me cry in public.
      she was such a statuesque woman…

      May 16, 2008 at 2:00 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.2   Wade bang

      Her boyfriend is Oedipus?

      May 16, 2008 at 2:05 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.3   se

      I was going say these pics are of my sister, but you kind of beat me to it…

      May 16, 2008 at 2:22 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.4   claw71 bang

      I’ve got pics of your sister too. Do hairy pits run in the family?

      May 16, 2008 at 2:46 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.5   se

      well yes, along with hairy nostrils and hairy palms.

      May 16, 2008 at 3:58 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   no one in particular

    Apparently she doesn’t have an em dash key on her sharpie, so she had to use two hyphens instead. Sad.

    May 16, 2008 at 2:05 pm   rating: 34  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   known unknown

    how does she know that SHE’S not the ex?

    I’m Team: When You Assume, You Make An Ass Out of U and Me But Thanks For The Shower And Grab Yourself A Sandwich While You’re Out, Slim.

    May 16, 2008 at 2:29 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Canthz_B bang

    All this needed was a smiley.

    May 16, 2008 at 2:39 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   KittyKat

    Notice the correct usage of your and you’re and she’s? Even when stressed, she uses proper grammer. I like her. Dude IS totally a douche!

    May 16, 2008 at 2:48 pm   rating: 34  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   Sue Do Nim bang

      Yes, but she lost me at “you better.”

      May 16, 2008 at 5:50 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   claw71 bang

    Carrie Underwood:

    Right now, he’s probably in the shower getting pubes on my loofa and using all my Pantene

    Right now his phone’s vibrating and a picture pops up of big fat hoochie

    Right now, he’s probably urinating in the tub because he’s a douche-bag dildo

    But he don’t know

    That I took a Sharpie to his collegiate-lined, Spiral notebook sitting off to the side
    Of my brand new leather love seat

    I used the f-word and made my point, told him to get out of this joint

    Maybe I’ll take a walk to blow off steam.

    May 16, 2008 at 2:58 pm   rating: 46  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   Packer487

      Win!

      May 16, 2008 at 5:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.2   Jessica

      That is fabulous.

      May 17, 2008 at 2:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.3   Jeshicurr

      Wow, I’m more impressed with this comment than the note itself.

      Jul 9, 2009 at 8:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #23   KittyKat

    You know, if you think about it, equating men with douches is apropo. They both squirt fluid into vaginas.

    May 16, 2008 at 3:04 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   claw71 bang

      We’ll squirt it wherever you want…just ask.

      May 16, 2008 at 3:09 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.2   RunBarbara bang

      I have something in my eye…can you help me flush it out?

      May 16, 2008 at 3:23 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.3   nelleellen

      Trust me, you don’t want to do that. Try explaining a bloodshot pupil to your parents at the age of 17.

      May 16, 2008 at 7:39 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   Cricket

    I’ll never understand why women want to hurt each other by calling each other “fat”.

    “fat” has overtaken “bitch” as the catalyst word for girl fights.

    and WHY is this bitch insulting a chick who has FUCK ALL to do with this? the BOYFRIEND is an asshole for keeping those pics from a former life.

    YOU are a stupid bitch for leaving a pass-agg note INSTEAD of being a WOMAN and confronting him TO HIS FACE.

    no sympathy for you, bitch.

    ps. you’re fucking fat, WTF?

    May 16, 2008 at 3:06 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   claw71 bang

      I think we found the fat ex.

      May 16, 2008 at 3:11 pm   rating: 39  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.2   KittyKat

      Methinks Cricket doth protest too much.

      May 16, 2008 at 3:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.3   known unknown

      *thinks about it*

      Well, she KNOWS the girl is fat but she doesn’t know that she’s a bitch.

      Just like if you called me fat, I’d say “Bitch, (because at that point, that’s what you’d be) you don’t KNOW me!”

      But if you called me a bitch, I’d ask where we’d met.

      May 16, 2008 at 3:32 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.4   Bex

      I’m not fat… I’m fluffy

      May 17, 2008 at 9:30 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.5   fantasy bang

      ……..is that you Fluffy Buns? Can I come back home? I’m sorry for the nude pictures I showed all my freinds.

      PLEASE, I Love You Fluffy! ♥

      May 17, 2008 at 11:39 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   Melanie

    Yes, because everyone knows that fat women are unloveable and should never, EVAR be photographed naked, much less touched or looked at!!! What was he THINKING?!?! WTF????

    Team Ah, Fuck It.

    May 16, 2008 at 3:08 pm   rating: 32  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   claw71 bang

      So you’re saying fat women should be photographed naked? Sorry but I can’t support you if that’s part of your platform.

      Fat women should be forced to wear burqas. Seriously. There’s nothing quite as offensive as a 300 pound war pig who thinks she’s “curvy”…bitch, you don’t have curves, that’s a circumference.

      May 16, 2008 at 3:17 pm   rating: 32  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.2   KittyKat

      That goes for fat guys too.

      Fat guy in a little coat . . .

      May 16, 2008 at 3:56 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.3   summer

      Thank you Kitty, I think fat guys are the most unattractive thing on the planet.

      May 16, 2008 at 4:14 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.4   gingerE

      Come now, haven’t you seen the show “How to look good naked”? They photograph naked fat people all the time.

      May 17, 2008 at 10:25 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.5   JohnTas

      Leonard Nimoy, YES that’s right, SPOCK has a different take on what fat is and isn’t.
      Also…what is attractive and what isn’t…..
      Go figure.
      http://www.leonardnimoyphotography.com/7body.htm

      May 25, 2008 at 12:35 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.6   Charlotte

      All right, then, Claw71, let’s see your six pack. Since clearly you are the end all and be all authority on what’s considered bodily attractive, I assume you must conform quite nicely to the societal ideal of a sexually appealing physique.

      Call me a fat bitch and I’ll only congratulate you on your stunning power of deduction.

      May 26, 2008 at 2:47 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.7   Crash bang

      You’re about 10 days late,
      And there’s already chicks fighting over his python… :mrgreen:

      May 26, 2008 at 2:59 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.8   zombieBlanco bang

      Charlotte- be here for more than a second and you’ll realize that claw is the end all and be all- count me in for the chick fight!

      May 26, 2008 at 3:03 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.9   Charlotte

      Awesome. I love a good chick fight. Hang on and lemme go grab some popcorn.

      Heh, Crash, I am ALWAYS late.

      May 26, 2008 at 4:14 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.10   Crash bang

      It’s not my fault… 8O

      Aug 17, 2008 at 6:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #26   JPav

    Aww hell… now I gotta know how it ends! Was he the fuck out of her apartment by the time she got back? WTF?

    May 16, 2008 at 3:08 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   Blahblah

      Yes, I wanna know, too! “WTF: the sequel” We want updates!!!

      May 20, 2008 at 3:59 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   fantasy bang

    He is really going to want his ex-fatfuck now! Maybe he should use his porn phone to call her and let her know to get her fat ass in the shower because he will be over after getting the short shrift.

    May 16, 2008 at 3:14 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Sharon J

    She should have flushed the toilet.

    May 16, 2008 at 3:15 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   kat

      With his cell phone in it!

      May 16, 2008 at 10:41 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #28.2   Sharon J

      and filled with poop. That would have been awesome.

      May 18, 2008 at 12:31 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   Katzndogz bang

    I was totally with her till she made the fat comment. No grrl power for you! You’re on your own.

    May 16, 2008 at 3:21 pm   rating: 38  small thumbs up

    • #29.1   unholyghost2003 bang

      You don’t know. Maybe he was a dickhead who was always saying things like “Hey chubby. Careful, you are putting on weight!” So this poor girl STARVES herself to be beautiful for him and he has pics of his fat ex.

      May 16, 2008 at 4:08 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #29.2   Fizz

      Yeah, I totally agree. Not dignified, not cool. Up until then I was completely on-side though.

      Jun 11, 2008 at 9:06 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #30   Lisa

    Hey, some dudes are just chubby chasers. Even fatties need some loving.

    Team Don’t be Hatin’!

    May 16, 2008 at 3:58 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   KittyKat

    How does the note-writer know that woman is his ex? Maybe it’s just a porno pic he downloaded . Maybe he gets off on fat chicks. She should watch out lest she become one.

    Yeah, baby, let’s go out to eat. Oh yeah, baby, eat that lasagna. Don’t worry, they only use non-fat cheese here. Have another cannoli.

    May 16, 2008 at 4:04 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   djr

      I know what a few of my ex-boyfriends’ exes look like. I see no reason to doubt that she also knows what her (now) ex-boyfriend’s ex looks like. Unfortunately for her, now she knows what she looks like naked, too. =P

      May 16, 2008 at 5:16 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.2   KittyKat

      If she knew what the ex looked like, then she would have known the ex was fat. I’m assuming the “She’s fucking fat! WTF?” means this is the first time she has seen the “ex”, otherwise she wouldn’t be surprised that the other woman is fucking fat.

      May 16, 2008 at 5:34 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.3   Christina

      Not necessarily. She may be saying WTF? in as in “Why the Fuck do you have a naked picture of a fat girl at all?’ I’m not a fan of calling fat women fat but if I had been this woman, I would be extremely pissed and being PC in a note like this is the furthest thing from my mind. Though, I believe leaving a note and taking a walk is a lot smarter than what I would have done: Opened the shower curtain, squirt some liquid soap in his eye and threw every stitch of clothing he had out the window so he had to go outside naked. But that’s just me.

      May 16, 2008 at 6:55 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.4   known unknown bang

      “that’ll do, Pig.”

      May 16, 2008 at 7:37 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.5   reverend dick

      Not liquid soap. Boiling collard greens are the angry woman’s weapons of choice against showering males.

      May 17, 2008 at 12:58 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.6   How? I have two words for you

      Myspace. Stalking.

      May 17, 2008 at 2:39 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   skeezycheeses

    TEAM Fat Girls Need Love Too!! And we’re real eager to please in the sack!

    May 16, 2008 at 4:28 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #32.1   se

      mmmm, fat girls are fucking delicious.

      May 16, 2008 at 6:09 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #32.2   secondsout bang

      Just roll them in flour and look for the wet spot.

      May 16, 2008 at 7:30 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #32.3   summer

      that’s just fucking gross, and I got a visual.

      May 16, 2008 at 9:49 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #32.4   voice of reason

      If you’re fat, you’re obviously doing and eating things that aren’t healthy for you.
      Why should we love you if you don’t love yourself?WTF?

      May 17, 2008 at 2:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #32.5   Sharon J

      What’s wrong with not eating healthy? French fries taste good.

      May 18, 2008 at 12:33 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #32.6   punkypower bang

      #32.4 – The same could be said for people who smoke or drink. Neither of those things are healthy. Neither is driving like an asshole. Really, if you’re deciding on who should and shouldn’t get fucked based on their healthy choices, NOBODY would get laid.

      Aug 17, 2008 at 7:50 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #33   pistola

    My ex gf went through my phone once and erased a couple of girls names she didn’t recognize, and then months later had the balls to tell me about. I was beginning to wonder where my cousin’s numbers were when I wanted to call them around the holidays. Needless to say I don’t leave my phone unattended around nosey women anymore.

    May 16, 2008 at 6:09 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   owen

    she would come back and find her house empty. lol

    May 16, 2008 at 6:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #34.1   secondsout bang

      But leave a few copies of fat-girl porn around for fun.

      May 16, 2008 at 7:08 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #35   angiers

    The dude is a douche but the chick that wrote this note isn’t any better. Name calling is just immature.

    May 16, 2008 at 6:47 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #35.1   summer

      but so much fun.

      May 16, 2008 at 7:30 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #36   secondsout bang

    Now, here’s a question for the guys. Just how many of us would load a naked pic of some fat girl onto a friend’s phone and set it as his backtop wallpaper as a joke? I would! I’ve done things like that, and my friends have done things like that to me. We had this picture of this one ugly girl (clothed, but she was an ugly girl we both new) that we kept setting up for each other to find. I set it as his desktop wallpaper once, his screen saver once, and I had his computer set to open up the picture every time he started the computer.

    May 16, 2008 at 7:07 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   known unknown bang

      I’m not a guy, but I do that to the boyfriend all the time.

      All the girls he bums showers from think I’m 400 lbs.

      May 16, 2008 at 7:24 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.2   summer

      fat girls are like mopeds, they’re fun to ride until your friends find out.

      May 16, 2008 at 9:48 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #37   Tyler bang

    I just realized: why was his phone not set to turn off the screen after a certain amount of time? Not only did he lose is girlfriend, but also drained his battery!!!

    May 16, 2008 at 11:24 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   RALPHY

    Handwriting—–10
    Content———–10
    Losing it at the end and getting all emonional–Priceless

    May 17, 2008 at 12:12 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   claw71 bang

    And Reverend Dick wins with an Al Green reference.

    May 17, 2008 at 9:44 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #39.1   park rose bang

      Bet you wished you gigglebraxed that comment.

      May 17, 2008 at 10:42 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.2   known unknown bang

      Reverends and dicks always win…

      but Al Green got owned by a pot of boiling grits, not greens.

      E for effort though.

      May 17, 2008 at 10:47 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.3   park rose bang

      And K for Kudos knunk!

      May 17, 2008 at 11:05 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.4   Blahblah

      Nah, Al Green got boiling grits thrown in his face, not collard greens. Either one works great as revenge-food, though :)

      May 20, 2008 at 4:04 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #40   orangebaby911

    I’m fat but that is fucking delicious!
    Team Fat- 1
    Team walk it off- 0
    clueless guy in the shower-??

    Don’t hate the fat ones. Who else will be there to cook for you when you are hungry?

    May 17, 2008 at 10:30 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   Wade bang

    Sadly, it was a naked picture of the note writer.

    She didn’t realize cell phone photos add 100 pounds.

    May 17, 2008 at 10:46 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Booger Eater bang

    I don’t think he left his phone open. She’s a nosey bitch and I think he wanted her to see the pic anyway.

    May 17, 2008 at 11:15 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #42.1   park rose bang

      Your comment does not make any sense.

      May 17, 2008 at 11:18 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #42.2   Booger Eater bang

      Well, she said his phone was left open. I think she’s lying. I think she was snooping around. Funny how it happened while he’s in the shower huh.
      And maybe it was subconcious (sp), but I think he wanted her to see the pic anyway, so he could have a reason to break up with her.

      May 17, 2008 at 11:25 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #42.3   Sue Do Nim bang

      Well, thanks for the clarification attempt, but it still makes no sense. Either she’s a lying bitch, OR he intentionally left the phone open. He couldn’t have subconsciously left it open AND she opened it and lied about it.

      May 17, 2008 at 1:58 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #42.4   Booger Eater bang

      Ok. I see what you’re getting at.
      I think he left the pic on his phone on purpose, so that when SHE opened it, she’d see it. In my opinion, the phone was closed WITH the picture as a background, and she opened it.
      Sorry for the confusion.

      May 18, 2008 at 9:18 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #42.5   known unknown bang

      *chuckle*

      bless your heart.

      May 18, 2008 at 12:05 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #42.6   karin

      coulda left the phone opened and it rang which turns the backlight on and draws attention to it.

      May 18, 2008 at 9:19 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #42.7   So Basically

      It’s a trap to dump nosey girlfriends. And yes. Boys would do something this stupid so they don’t have to dump girls, and instead get said girls to dump them.

      May 20, 2008 at 9:24 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #42.8   blahblah

      known unknown:

      *chuckle*

      bless your heart.

      me:
      http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bless+your+heart

      LOL!

      May 20, 2008 at 4:06 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #43   Beth

    What, no clipart?

    May 17, 2008 at 4:55 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   Ivy

    I would have said team note-writer, except that she seemed to say that the ex’s fatness implied his douchiness. Team photographed nude chik.

    May 17, 2008 at 6:15 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #44.1   nestchick

      I second that.

      May 18, 2008 at 12:29 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #45   Peps

    What a lady… She deserves what she has gotten.

    May 18, 2008 at 4:53 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   Mung Bean

    Brings up an interesting point: shouldn’t there be some kind of amnesty period in which someone in a new relationship is given adequate time to purge their shelves, webpages, and cell phones of all offending material in reference to the previous S.O.?

    Whatever that deadline may be, I’m guessing this guy must’ve exceeded it. By a mile.

    May 19, 2008 at 11:46 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #46.1   blahblah

      I don’t get rid of any ex photos. I just hide them really, really well – with encrypted passwords. :)

      May 20, 2008 at 4:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #47   just me

    I just simply wonder whether it is the same guy who on our second (and albeit last) date pulled out his phone and had a picture of his ex’s rather fabulous tits (I am pretty secure I don’t call other women fat) as the background. When I understandably had an issue with the picture he protested that “oh it’s over, it’s just a picture…it has been EIGHT MONTHS!”…then I definitely knew it wasn’t “just a picture.”

    May 19, 2008 at 6:55 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #47.1   blahblah

      See, this is how men and women are different. Men can be in love with the ex’s fab tits without being in love with the ex. Having a picture of said fab tits is better than keeping the ex around. The picture can’t talk.

      May 20, 2008 at 4:11 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #48   tom

    There’s nothing wrong with the man in the shower that a stiletto to the throat couldn’t cure.

    May 23, 2008 at 9:43 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #48.1   Crash bang

      There’s nothing wrong with tom that a few punches to the throat couldn’t cure.

      May 23, 2008 at 10:17 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #49   johntas

    http://www.leonardnimoyphotography.com/7body.htm

    May 25, 2008 at 12:42 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #50   mccormicky

    She didn’t trust him so she waited for an opportunity, opened his phone and got an eyeful. But he must have been bad in bed anyway otherwise she wouldn’t kick him out just for chubby pics.
    Don’t be bad in bed, you can’t get away with anything.

    May 31, 2008 at 3:02 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #51   Orannis

    That’s not funny, my brother died that way.

    Aug 17, 2008 at 2:23 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #52   Dating Online in New York

    strange, I love that message even if it’s a simple go away message
    it’s so nicely written :D

    Aug 17, 2008 at 2:52 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   a little advice for the ladies

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    Mar 12, 2009 at 6:28 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

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      Good for you! You may not know this but this is not Twitter.

      Mar 12, 2009 at 7:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
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    Oct 21, 2009 at 11:52 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #57   Some relationship advice from your roommate | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

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    Apr 10, 2011 at 10:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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