We all need somebody to hate on

June 4th, 2008 · 152 comments

“Working in a university library, you get used to a lot of ‘quirky’ personalities,” says our anonymous submitter in Manhattan, Kansas. “So far, this is the only one that has decided to put pathology to paper.”

we all need somebody to hate on

FILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · college life · exclamation-point happy!!!! · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · Kansas · nonsensical spacing · touching


152 responses so far ↓

  • #1   grammargrandma

    What does “ONLY” mean in this sentence?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:37 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   HopefulNebula

      As opposed to potted in soil, probably.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:14 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   GhostWriter bang

      Alternately, it’s a juvenile use of the conjunction: “I thought my plants would be safe- only somebody keeps knocking them over!

      Jun 4, 2008 at 8:29 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   amazon bang

      “Water only” = Hydroponics. There’s only one thing I know of that people actually grow using hydroponics. Perhaps (s)he misspelled “pod” ;)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 3:57 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   meowmix

      heh, amazon. does that look like a note a stoner would write? :)

      several plants can grow in a jar of water, including leaf cuttings from the (ubiquitous) philodendron.

      vocabulary bonus fact: the roots that grow from such a cutting are called adventitious roots.

      Jun 22, 2008 at 8:36 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Canthz_B bang

    Libraries usually make me sleepy but not if there are pods around!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:42 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Canthz_B bang

      Dr. Miles J. Bennell: They’re here already! You’re next! You’re next, You’re next…!

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:59 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Delurker

    That plant was fucking delicious.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   Canthz_B bang

    I wonder if she’s growing peas in her pod.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   secondsout bang

    …and if I don’t want to talk to you??

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:43 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   known unknown bang

      …and if you would not drench my archival papers?

      what would you do to me???

      8O

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   secondsout bang

    Holy shit, pod people!!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:44 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   zombieBlanco bang

    Even zombies know to be afraid of the pod people. We know what they would do to you. DO NOT MAKE AN APPOINTMENT, DO NOT TALK TO THE POD PEOPLE!!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:45 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   secondsout bang

    I was just about to climb on this guy’s plant. Good thing he stopped me. Banzai trees aren’t terribly sturdy. In hindsight, that was just a bad idea.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:45 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   park rose bang

      Bonsai. Sorry S’out. :)

      Banzai is when you put your hands in the air, like you just don’t care…

      or rather, shout Banzai 3 times, and tackle the task at hand.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 5:24 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   amazon bang

      Super fly! Banzai!!!

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYE3riHLptI

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:08 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   secondsout bang

    It used to be that young college students were weary of growing up to work in a cubicle farm. Cubicle is one of those words that sounds cold and uninviting. Pod just sounds goddamn strange. I hope I never work in one of those.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:47 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Canthz_B bang

      Pod makes me think of a trans-generational starship, but I watch/read way too much sci-fi.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 12:54 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   secondsout bang

    Shouldn’t the plants be in containers that have more than water only? Like, maybe, some potting soil?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:48 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   zombieBlanco bang

      Shouldn’t someone working with archival papers forgo having plants altogether?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:11 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   RunBarbara bang

      Shouldn’t she have a computer to store archives?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 10:53 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   ArchivistJohn

      Um, no; archives are materials that document the past, such as photographs of Abraham Lincoln or letters written by Martha Washington. Libraries tend to hold on to them rather than dumping them in the trash after they’ve “put them in the computer.”

      You also made the sexist mistake of assuming the person who left the note is a female.

      RunBarbara – FAIL!

      Jun 18, 2008 at 11:33 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   Canthz_B bang

    ♫ “Hey! You! Don’t lean on my pod!” ♫

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:00 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   known unknown bang

    … plants in containers of water and pod people…

    there’s a Soylent Green joke in here somewhere…

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:02 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   fantasy bang

      Or it could be Soylent Green if a plant is considered a uterus and it is stored in water only,

      ……. what the hell is it tofo?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:37 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Crash bang

    Can you imagine having to make an appointment to fire this person ??

    Boss man : “We need to talk. ”

    Pathological Librarian Pod Person : “Sorry, I’m booked till the 5th of next month, come back then, and we can talk…
    AND DON’T TOUCH MY POD !!!”

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:06 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Crash bang

      Boss man : “You’re fired…”

      Pathological Librarian Pod Person : “I CAN’T HEAR YOU TILL NEXT MONTH ON THE 5th !!!!
      YOU HAVE TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT TO TALK TO ME FIRST !!!
      AND STOP TOUCHING MY POD!!”

      Jun 4, 2008 at 2:57 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   Fnnkybutt bang

    She should paint her pod lime green. That’d keep the triflers away.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:15 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Zsa bang

    Ah~ this is one of those people… when I walk by her pod, I will scritch my fingernails across her fabric walls and lean on her “doorway” when chatting with her pod-mate. Lucky me~ she’ll hate me so much she won’t even THINK of asking me to water her plants when she goes on vacation.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:20 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   known unknown bang

    IF YOU WANT “TO” TALK TO ME SEE CASEY IN HUMAN “RESOURCES”!!!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:23 am   rating: 48  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   RunBarbara bang

      Im busy enough, God damn it.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 10:53 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   known unknown bang

    I iz en ur pod

    leenin’ on ur plantz

    & soaken up ur archival payperz!!1!11!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:25 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   RunBarbara bang

      plantz prae to ceiling cat
      for bukkit insted of
      waters onlee!11!!

      Jun 4, 2008 at 11:07 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   Crash bang

    Funny thing is…
    I think bamboo is a plant that just sits in water, no soil.
    And I think it’s supposed to bring good luck or something too. :?
    Guess it works better for drenching archival papers though. :mrgreen:

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:26 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   known unknown bang

      drenched archival papers are a “big job”

      I wonder what kind of bag is used for the clean up…

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:30 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.2   se

      that might be a “douche bag”

      Jun 4, 2008 at 3:56 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.3   secondsout bang

      Just so long as you don’t use the towels that are nearby. Those are decorative only.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:03 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.4   amazon bang

      you know what? I hear (and say) the word douche bag all the time, and I have no idea what one actually is. I could probably make a good guess, but I’ve never even seen one, not even a picture of one.

      It is taking all my will power not to google “douche bag.” I think I prefer the mystery ;)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:15 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.5   Canthz_B bang

      Think hot water bottle, tube and nozzle and imagine what MacGyver could do with them! ;-)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 6:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   fantasy bang

    “Urban dictionary” defines this note very interesting!

    ” Stay off my uterus and don’t lean on my

    vulva! If you want to talk about it make an

    appointment!”

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:32 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   Crash bang

      I wann’a talk about your uvula at 3PM tomorrow !! 8O

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:39 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   Lorelie

      Talk about or to her uvula?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 10:31 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.3   changling

      uvula=thingy at back of throat
      vulva=you know what

      Jun 5, 2008 at 8:46 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.4   Crash bang

      Yes…
      I know,
      My comment was more of an inside joke…
      But I do know the difference. :?

      Jun 6, 2008 at 12:24 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   Canthz_B bang

    I’d like to see the inside of this pod. It must be covered with notes to self because she’s clearly used all of her push-pins!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:45 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   RunBarbara bang

      Note to self:
      Hate men, wear hair in bun, buy orthopedic shoes.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 11:10 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.2   poepoe

      … and feed my many cats …

      Jun 5, 2008 at 11:39 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   Sarah bang

    She has her plants in water? Like out of the toilet? I’ve never seen no plants grow out of no toilet!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 2:36 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   Sundance bang

      She should keep them in Brawndo!

      Jun 4, 2008 at 2:45 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.2   SMRT

      It’s got what plants crave!

      – brought to you by “sandra”

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:04 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   Michael Aivaliotis

    I don’t see anything wrong with this note.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 2:56 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   zombieBlanco bang

      That’s scary.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 3:13 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.2   tinkerbell2

      Michael, are you a pod person?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 8:13 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.3   djr

      Outside of excessive use of OMG CAPS AND EXCLAMATION MARKS!!!!!!!1

      I really don’t either. Unless he/she has no reason to demand one makes an appointment to talk to him/her.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 2:53 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.4   KittyKat bang

      ‘Tis not whether the note is right or wrong, but whether it contains enough fodder with which to amuse ourselves.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 3:37 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.5   amazon bang

      I think we can agree that the line justifications and spacing is odd.
      Center

      Left

      Left, Indented

      Left
      Center

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:20 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #23   Audrey II

    FEED ME!!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 3:21 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   park rose bang

      Had to link it :mrgreen:

      Jun 4, 2008 at 9:00 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.2   amazon bang

      *adds Little Shop of Horrors to her NetFlix queue*

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   TuesdayPillow

    Gratuitous amounts of exclamation points bother me. I wonder if she is capable of screaming that loud?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 3:29 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   zombieBlanco bang

      The exclamation points, the caplocks, the haphazard justification, we’re way past screaming, and onto incoherent spitting and stuttering.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 3:40 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   park rose bang

    Let’s see how it goes. :oops: To the tune of Bowie’s
    Suffragette City

    (hey man) oh stay offa my plant you know
    (hey man) oh I gotta an archival grant, I gotta
    (hey man) I gotta straighten my face
    This yellow bound book just put its spine out of place

    (hey man) I may be insane
    (hey man) my work’s down the drain
    (hey man) well I’m a total blam-blam
    She said she had to reach it but she..and then she..

    Oh don’t lean on my pod, cause you can’t afford to tick me (off)
    I’m back and I’m feeling shitty
    Oh don’t lean on my pod
    Cause you ain’t got my permission
    You know I’m a suffering biddy
    Stay outta sight…I’m always right

    (hey man) ah someone knocked all my plants, go away
    (hey man) I can’t take you this time, no way
    (hey man) I wouldn’t do this to you
    The only time to talk to me is at one is at one

    Oh don’t lean on my pod, cause you can’t afford to tick me (off)
    It’s a veiled threat absolutely
    Oh don’t lean on my pod
    Cause you gotta ring and book me
    Don’t m*f wet my hist’ry
    Stay outta sight…I’m always right

    Oh don’t shit me!

    Oh don’t lean on my pod, etc. x3

    Ohhh, wham bam…?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 4:36 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   hibousoir

    Oh, I can vouch for the fact that library employees–particularly FEMALE library employees–are mutha-effin’ bonkers. I’ve worked with women who forgo pod notes and speak to each other like this in staff meetings.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 5:49 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   linoutt

      Hey, now. We’re not ALL completely nuts. :)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 10:01 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.2   hibousoir

      Sure, that’s what they ALL say! LOL! :D Actually, I guess that must mean I’m crazy, too. Except I try not to go nutso on people–either verbally or in any other format. I just post everyone’s business on MySpace, ha ha!

      Jun 4, 2008 at 10:26 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.3   linoutt

      Oh, I know I have my nutty moments as well. I’m still in school, so I haven’t become a “real” librarian yet. I’m sure once I graduate I will upgrade to psycho status. :)

      I did see a university reference librarian go off on someone yesterday. I’m not sure if someone touched her pod, though.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 10:37 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   cricket bang

    you must KNEEL before POD!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 5:52 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   RALPHY

    Staying off plants=2 exclamation marks
    Reaching across pad=3 exclamation marks
    Making an appointment=4 exclamation marks
    I guess shitting in her trash can would get at least 6 or 7.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 8:15 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   bellabeastie

      And drenched archival papers = priceless.

      Are you in Good Hands?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 9:34 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   Sundaeg1rl

    Well, call me a stickler for good old-fashioned Health & Safety, but is sticking containers full of water on a desk that contains a myriad electrical items and precious documents really a good idea? In fact, isn’t it some kind of violation of the workplace’s policy?

    What a muppet!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 8:31 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   GhostWriter bang

    “Look, Boss, somebody’s done it again! One of my plants is knocked over, and there’s water all over the archival papers.”

    “Gwen, remember what I told you about your pots?”

    “Look, I know you don’t think ice pots are appropriate here in the library, but my orchids thrive best in a container of water only. But LOOK- my ice pot is all gone, the orchid is lying there on my desk, and there’s water everywhere!!”

    “Gwen, just clean it up and use a plastic pot from now on. You can set it over there on the windowsill…”

    “DON’T LEAN ACROSS MY POD!!”

    Jun 4, 2008 at 8:37 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   Kevin

    You missed the “already” (all ready) – or has that changed in grammer rules, too?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 8:40 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   Joe

      What are you talking about? “Already” is the correct grammar for this case.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:52 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   reclusivemonkey

    NO APPOINTMENT FOR YOU!

    (With apologies to the Soup Nazi)

    Jun 4, 2008 at 8:42 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   Kev Orng

    Someone knocked my coffee onto my keyboard once. Call me crazy, but I took that as a sign that maybe I shouldn’t keep coffee next to my keyboard. I hope her archival documents were as easy to replace as my keyboard.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 9:05 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   Mishee bang

    I bet you anything this note was written by Dr. Evil.

    He is really possessive over his escape pod.

    And he always mutters how he’s surrounded by frickin’ idiots.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 9:07 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #34.1   KittyKat bang

      It was probably the frickin’ sharks with their frickin’ “lasers” splashing water on the archival papers. Cut ‘em some slack, they’re just sharks. Where’s PETA when you need them?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 12:40 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #35   Jim

    And quit moving my stapler.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 10:08 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   Lorelie

    I suppose “Stay the fuck away from me!” was too short?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 10:24 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   Sheepish bang

    just because you wouldn’t do something to me is not a good enough reason why i can’t do the same thing to you.
    that reasoning does not fly with me.
    what if i’m just not a nice person and i enjoy knocking over pots of water just to make your life miserable?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 10:27 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #37.1   KittyKat bang

      What are you, French?

      I enjoy knocking over pots of water just to make your life miserable! I fart in your general direction! I wave my private parts at your aunties, you cheesy lot of second-hand electric donkey bottom wipers.

      Do you speak with an out-rrrrrageous accent, too?

      courtesy Monty Python. Please, French lurkers, don’t make a socio-political discussion out of this post!

      Jun 4, 2008 at 12:53 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.2   Sheepish bang

      you are fantastic!
      that’s all i have to say about that.
      :)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 9:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #38   NoPunIntended bang

    I’d take this PAN as a sign to stay the F’ out of this library… someone’s on the verge of going postal… I mean podal.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 10:42 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   gradytripp

    So let me just keep my archival papers under these precariously hanging cups of water attached to a cubicle wall….la la la…let’s see: Howard Hughes’s Will…check….the original draft of the Constitution…check…..stamp with plane printed upside down….check….and finally, my Honus Wagner tobacco card….check.

    O.k. everything seems to be in order here….let me just leave this Fabergé Egg holding open the door, while this endangered black rhino guards everything.

    Time for a Vitamin water.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 11:33 am   rating: 30  small thumbs up

    • #39.1   Kev Orng

      StradiWHOius?

      Jun 5, 2008 at 3:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #40   unholyghost2003 bang

    I am with everyone who has said she should not keep plants in a fuckin library! There is nothing (nor should there be anything) in a library that is improved by the application of water, potting soil, or fertilizer. All things that are good for plants are not good for the microfiche, the books, the archival papers, and the french fries .

    Jun 4, 2008 at 11:40 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   KittyKat bang

    Plant (i.e. marijuana)
    Archival papers (i.e. rolling papers)
    Make an appointment (i.e. bring me some fucking tacos to appease the munchies!)

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:19 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Sarah bang

    She could just be a really, really obsessive fan of The Breeders.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:29 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Moon

    How do you know it’s a she? When I read it, I just assumed it was a guy.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:40 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #43.1   unholyghost2003 bang

      are there men who maintain “Cube Forests”? I thought that was a chick thing.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 12:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.2   Yup

      I’ve worked with guys (more than 1!) that have total cube forests, and would gladly school others on plant etiquette.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:09 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.3   unholyghost2003 bang

      oh … do they also live with their mothers and collect pictures of kittens?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:14 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.4   RunBarbara bang

      i bet they like Masterpiece Theater and wear topsiders.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 1:25 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.5   ruemorgue bang

      as the person who discovered the PAN, i’ll say that it’s a woman…strictly to clear up the situation, not to cast aspersions.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 2:02 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.6   unholyghost2003 bang

      Why not? casting aspersions is FUN!

      Jun 4, 2008 at 2:10 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.7   ruemorgue

      In that case, I wouldn’t cast this much if I went fishing :)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 2:16 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.8   se

      what are topsiders?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.9   RunBarbara bang

      hideous, awful shoes se.
      google image them. you will understand everything.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.10   Quite Contrary

      Do they also wear golf shirts that about two sizes two small for their beer bellies? (That’s what I get to see when I come to work.)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #44   Dr. How

    Knocking water only on my archival papers is KILLING ANTHONY GROSSO!

    Thank you Terry

    Jun 4, 2008 at 12:42 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   Quite Contrary

    I actually think she would do this to you. Especially if you didn’t make an appointment.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   Tad

    I’d throw a fit, too, if someone clumsily spilled water on archival documents I was using…

    That part I understand.

    What I don’t understand is the addendum about requiring an appointment to speak to people.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #46.1   amazon bang

      Maybe people without appointments chill in her pod, waiting for her, fondling her plants and knocking them over.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:43 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #47   Sue

    I’m willing to cut slack on this one. I’ve got a coworker who has absolutely no regard for my personal space and not only steps into my cube to talk with me, but sits on the edge of my desk! And once he had the nerve to put his foot ON my desk to tie his laces. WTF?? I not only told him directly to get the fuck out of my space, but then strung yellow tape across the opening of my cube with a sign saying “Dave-Free Zone.”

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:24 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #47.1   secondsout bang

      Yes, and if someone had taken a picture of that and mailed it to this website, it would be you who would be the target for the commenters’ ridicule. Yellow tape across your tube suggests you might be a bit of a headcase.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:15 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.2   amazon bang

      I think (hope) Sue was kidding.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 4:44 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.3   Shane

      Telling Dave off directly and THEN yellow taped sign would not get you on this site. Tape and sign only? Absolutely.

      Kudos for the Active Aggressive note, Sue.

      Jun 5, 2008 at 10:35 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.4   Sue

      Nope, I’m not kidding. And yes, I told him directly SEVERAL times to keep out of my space before resorting to the tape. It required a physical demonstration and barrier to get the message through, finally.

      Jun 5, 2008 at 12:36 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.5   Canthz_B bang

      Please don’t take this the wrong way, but the way you’ve described what you consider to be your personal space in your comments just makes me think that you have either an exceptionally small cubicle or an exceptionally over-inflated ego.
      I, for one, hope the former is true.

      Jun 5, 2008 at 1:07 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.6   Sue

      It’s a standard sized cubicle. The problem was that he would consistently encroach in my personal space, and would not take it seriously when I would ask him to step back, get his ass and/or feet off my desk, etc. He would even stand in my cubicle space in order to talk with my neighbor (we have low walls). He came back from surgery a little while ago and for some baffling reason decided that I wanted to see his stitches! He does none of this with anybody else. I don’t think it’s too much to ask for him to keep a proper distance in a work environment. And he’s not exactly Brad Pitt, if you get my drift.

      Jun 6, 2008 at 1:30 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.7   Canthz_B bang

      You’re probably no Angelina Jolie, so it’s all good! ;-)

      Jun 6, 2008 at 1:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.8   Mishee bang

      At least he doesn’t use all your TP and then clog the toilet.

      He waits until he gets home to do that… since it’s not a “Dave Free Zone” there…

      Jun 6, 2008 at 1:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #48   Quite Contrary

    If you want me to respond, make an appointment!

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:25 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   Miss Grace

    What is a pod? And, as a librarian I have to ask, why do you have large open containers of water near your archival papers?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:41 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #49.1   ruemorgue bang

      Pod is the same as a cubicle. As for the containers of water…um, your guess is as good as mine.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 2:03 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #50   mrs mls

    Whew. I’m glad the water missed the cat figurines and the knitting that just got started….

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:44 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #51   KittyKat bang

    “I’d like to talk to you.”

    “Make an appointment.”

    “How do I make an appointment?”

    “Ask me when I’m available.”

    “Okay, when are you available?”

    “Don’t talk to me. Make an appointment.”

    Jun 4, 2008 at 1:51 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #51.1   digitalxsunrise

      i’d write a note on her archival papers with the dirt from the plant. ha, FACE!

      Jun 4, 2008 at 2:15 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #52   Canthz_B bang

    I have a pretty good idea where they can find the office label-maker…

    “Jane’s” pod
    “Jane’s” plant
    “Jane’s” monitor
    “Jane’s” CPU
    “Jane’s” desk
    “Jane’s” chair
    “Jane’s” stapler
    etc, etc, etc…

    Jun 4, 2008 at 2:16 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   ErikaBlare

    Stay off my plant? Don’t lean on my pod? This note has sexual frustration written ALL over it.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 3:32 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #53.1   claw71 bang

      So you’re saying “plant” means “pubic hair” and “pod” would be the “clitoris”…veeery interesting.

      So do you theorize that the water represents urine and, if so, would that be a fetish or a phobia?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 5:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #53.2   RunBarbara bang

      two plants; one cup.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 5:28 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #53.3   ErikaBlare

      Ah, yes, Freud could have a field day with this… Maybe her latent penis envy somehow got transfered to some sort of botanical obsession, coupled with librarian prudishness, has led to an obsessive fear with anyone disturbing her “plants.”

      But, then again, sometimes a pod is just a pod. ;)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 8:04 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #53.4   poepoe

      “DO NOT REACH ACROSS MY POD!!!”, “…someone has already knocked …”, “…drenched all my …”, “I would not do this to you!!” … this person is clearly uncomfortable with an excess of moisture, anything leaning/reaching in her direction, and things staying on things. But, you can talk to her … IF you make an appointment. Just talk. No touching … due to sexual repression which has led to sexual frustration which is manifested in her plants which must not be knocked. So if you stay away from her pod altogether, her plants will be safe …
      And, Georgia O’Keeffe would totally agree with the plant = naughty bits analogy.

      Jun 5, 2008 at 11:27 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #54   Quite Contrary

    If they were sexually frustrated, as you say, wouldn’t they want their pod leaned on and someone on their plant?

    I’m just sayin…

    Jun 4, 2008 at 4:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #54.1   Canthz_B bang

      Maybe she’s afraid of being fertilized! :-P

      Jun 4, 2008 at 5:57 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #54.2   ErikaBlare

      Perhaps what I should have said was sexually repressed, rather than frustrated. Though I suppose the two go hand in hand, especially considering she is a librarian, after all.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 7:54 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #55   claw71 bang

    Quirky personalities?

    I thought libraries were staffed by egocentric jerks. I guess I was wrong.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 5:21 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #56   claw71 bang

    And why would they have a library in Kansas? When did they start reading?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 5:22 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #56.1   RunBarbara bang

      there are only so many willing cousins and second cousins, claw, before you get bored.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 5:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #56.2   claw71 bang

      But the sheep, RunBarbara, there are oh so many sheep just waiting to be ravaged.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 5:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #56.3   RunBarbara bang

      Thats what the books are for- to hit them over the head with.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 5:32 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #56.4   Dr. How bang

      Also make great wedges to level out the pod (trailer)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 5:43 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #56.5   RALPHY

      Hey claw-I met a kid in school once that loved to ravage sheep. And cows. And chickens. He claimed he had screwed everything on the farm except the cultivator, and he stood on top of it and wacked off. Just a point of interest. He died at an early age. Some pod disease i think.

      Jun 5, 2008 at 12:14 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #57   Lurker

    Waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwait.

    KANSAS has a Manhattan, too?

    Jun 4, 2008 at 5:34 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #57.1   claw71 bang

      Yeah and it’s a lot like the real Manhattan.

      It’s just the Kansas version smells like cow shit.

      Jun 4, 2008 at 6:03 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #57.2   known unknown bang

      and the real Manhattan smells like bull shit.

      .

      * ;-)

      Jun 4, 2008 at 6:13 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #57.3   poepoe

      New York has the Big Apple.
      Kansas has the Little Apple. (Seriously, that’s what Manhattan, KS is billed as for visitors.)
      And it’s a really very pretty town … with a one humdinger of a whacko librarian.

      Jun 5, 2008 at 11:36 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #58   Dr. How bang

    Seriously though, what library has pods? Pods are for peas and spaceships.

    DO NOT LEAN ON MY POD!!!
    STAY OFF MY PLANET!!!

    I would not do this to you.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 5:51 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #59   marcopuffin bang

    gone are the days when library workers just said “shhhh”

    Jun 4, 2008 at 7:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #60   GVI bang

    Looks like someone is growing some hydophonic marijuana and is a bit paranoid.

    Jun 4, 2008 at 7:57 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #60.1   Mishee bang

      *poof*

      did somebody say hydroponic?

      p.s. (I originally posted this to get a laugh over my pot addiction… but now it is also to make fun of the spelling gman… you know I wub you!!) :D

      Jun 4, 2008 at 8:08 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #60.2   summer

      does hydrophonic weed help you learn to read, is that what the “hooked on phonics” stuff was all about?

      Jun 4, 2008 at 9:25 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #60.3   amazon

      hooked on hydrophonics worked for me!

      Jun 5, 2008 at 6:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #61   rhelian

    GET OFF MY POD!! …Yup. It still sounds dirty.

    “What are you doing? Don’t lean on my pod!!!”
    “I wasn’t, I just -”
    “IF YOU’RE GOING TO GIVE ME EXCUSES, MAKE AN APPOINTMENT!!!!!”

    I wonder if she makes EVERYONE make an appointment to talk to her. Like… her mom, her credit card company, the guy she passes on the street who asks for the time…

    Jun 6, 2008 at 12:32 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #62   Quite Contrary

    Sheesh. No “please,” “THX,” or “ppl.”

    Jun 6, 2008 at 1:59 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #62.1   Canthz_B bang

      She was going to add one of those, but grew tired of the project! :-)

      Jun 6, 2008 at 2:32 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #63   Quite Contrary

    And didn’t like lying either…

    Jun 6, 2008 at 2:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #64   libworker bang

    In this case I know the person. This sign was up because her pod is right next to the elevator. People always disrupt her when she is working and nose around in her stuff while waiting for the elevator. Since this was posted the sign had to be taken down.

    Jun 13, 2008 at 12:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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