“My friend Katelyn’s roommate left her this note before she went away for Memorial Day weekend last year,” says Monica in Boston. “I love how it starts off so BFF-like…then takes a sharp left into passive-aggressive territory.”
Adds Monica: “While Katelyn normally likes to avoid confrontation, I think this note pushed her over the edge. She didn’t empty the trash or rinse a dish the entire weekend, and they spent the next three months before their lease ended in a passive-aggressive standoff (purposely being loud when they knew the other had to study…’accidentally’ breaking the other’s belongings, etc.) Good times!”
related: (They match the plastic slipcover on the futon)
150 responses so far ↓
#1
TuesdayPillow
Ah yes, the Bostonian passive-aggressive note. Just picture and pronounce all the words without their respective “r”s and you’ll see how it’s much worse than your standard PAN.
Jun 10, 2008 at 4:57 pm rating: 4
#2
zchamu
“I lovelovelove you, smoochy kiss! And rinse the fucking dishes before you put them in the dishwasher, you bitch! Kisskiss!”
Jun 10, 2008 at 4:58 pm rating: 36
#3
Joyful
The attempt to keep this note lighthearted is so very painful. And maddening!
Team dirty sink!
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:00 pm rating: 6
#4
GhostWriter
A typical commenter might assume that the passive-aggressiveness starts with the 2nd paragraph.
The learned eye sees that “drunk-dialing” is simply chore-monitoring in disguise.
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:05 pm rating: 42
#5
vimandvigor
“You are so silly the way you leave food all over the plates to be dried on and crusted over in the dishwasher. Oh! Oh! And I LOVE how when I come home I get to see what you’ve eaten in my absence because you leave chunks of salsa in the drain. You go girl! Love and Hugs, Sam”
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:07 pm rating: 6
#6
Mishee
Hmmm, this almost sounds like a note from my mom.
Just take out the “have a good time”, “don’t miss me too much”, and of course, the under appreciated “Thanks”…
Other than that, JUST like Mom..
*sigh*
I should give her a call… or have RB do it.
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:08 pm rating: 4
#7
HeWhoCannotBeNamed
That kind of talk is bound to incur some spiteful retaliatory wrath. She might as well have written “P.S. Make sure you fuck my boyfriend while I’m away. See ya Tuesday!”
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:10 pm rating: 23
#8
GhostWriter
Everybody knows that Sam really wanted to use the phrase, C-U-Next-Tuesday as her closing.
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:11 pm rating: 56
#9
Mishee
This should be 8.1, my “Reply To This Comment” isn’t working: GW – it took me like, 5 times reading your comment before I got it.
Genius! LOLing all the way to the bank!
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:14 pm rating: 2
#10
unholyghost2003
*sigh* Fighting passive aggression with passive aggression. When will people learn? What is wrong with some aggression aggression? “Wow! I hope you had as much fun this weekend as I had reading your snotty little note. I’m not retarded, you ARE OCD though. Unless I am SHITTING in it the sink will not need to be cleaned after 3 days. Rinsed? Sure! Cleaned? No. So how about you back the fuck off.”
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:24 pm rating: 19
#11
Joe
Oh, God that penmanship! I could only IMAGINE what a joy it is to live with this obsessive tyrant. What a control freak you are Samantha.
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:36 pm rating: 0
#12
Mark
If the dishwasher is less than 10 years old or so, RINSING before you put dishes in is most likely UNNECESSARY, and only WASTES water. Kisses!
THX,
SANDRA
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:50 pm rating: 9
#13
KittyKat
Empty the trash? Sure! How about in your bed, Sammie?
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:53 pm rating: 3
#14
RALPHY
This was written by a typical Virgo. I’d like to find out what her plan “B” and plan”C’ was and then, when all else failed, what vailed threats was she going to make in one of her “Drunk Dials”.
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:56 pm rating: 0
#15
paranoiagirl
“I just wanted to be sure you knew that this is stuff that needs to be done on a regular basis. Thanks!”
translation: “I’m going to talk to you like you’re 5 and have no concept of what cleaning is, BITCH.”
A former roommate of mine asked my friend: “now, what do we do when we’re done with our toys?” while she picked up a tape measure he had been fiddling with. GHAA.
Jun 10, 2008 at 5:59 pm rating: 7
#16
Jimmy Straightline
Sam,
How dare you leave me a note attempting to remote-control me? To put you in your place, I will spend 3 months “accidentally” breaking your shit. After that I will just badmouth you forever, but we still won’t be even.
XO Sandra
Jun 10, 2008 at 6:04 pm rating: 4
#17
claw71
Whoa, that’s just nasty.
If I’m Katelyn I’d make sure the trash was emptiued and the dishes were spotless. Sam would come home to a remarkably spotless house and warm welcome home hug.
We’d order pizza (my treat) and I’d even offer to throw her travel clothes in the laundry as I would be doing a small load of my own. We’d be the best of friends. Giggling as she regaled me with stories of her travels.
Then we’d turn in for the evening and Sam would come to the grim realization that I had been using her bed as a toilet for the entire duration of her trip. And she’d know why because that note of hers would be stuck to the wall with the very first wipe.
Jun 10, 2008 at 6:09 pm rating: 30
#18
marcopuffin
Katelyn should have fought pa with pa by ignoring Sam’s instructions, saying nothing about her note but doing lots of extremely annoying things until their tenancy expired and then posting Sam’s note on PAN… oh
Jun 10, 2008 at 6:39 pm rating: 18
#19
damon
Why the hell would I even have a dishwasher if I was going to wash the dishes before I washed the dishes? Team Not Rinsing!
Jun 10, 2008 at 6:56 pm rating: 8
#20
Sarah
Translation:
“Hey, Katelyn! Sorry you’re stuck here alone while I have a fantastic weekend of debauchery. I’ll be sure to let you know how much fun I’m having. Oh, by the way, can you take over all my chores? I’d do them, but I’m too busy getting drunk. And you’re not. Sorry! I left you some dirty dishes so you won’t get too bored.
Love, Sam”
Jun 10, 2008 at 7:01 pm rating: 8
#21
fantasy
Cinderella maybe?
I bet she plays the ugly-fugly step-sis all the time.
“I am going to go out and party”
*which means on a three day drunk*
“You stay home and make sure it smells nice for
when I come stumbling home.
‘Cause I am going to have one whopping
hangover and I want that sink clean so I can
puke in it.
I just cannot tolerate puking in a dirty sink!
Fooled you,I am not about to call you!
Just wanted you to feel good about yourself
while you cleaned for me!
♥ Thanks,
SAM ♥
Jun 10, 2008 at 7:06 pm rating: 5
#22
gradytripp
Dear Katelyn,
When you are done with your events at the Special Olympics…and yes, feel free to wait until after all the hugs and participant ribbons have been given out, could you pleasey pleasey put the garbage in the garbage bags…those are the big black almost shiny things you are not normally allowed to play with because you might choke on them. Don’t get them near your ears, we both know how much you hate anything near your ears. Once you do that, put it out by the street for me dear. I know…I know, you normally aren’t allowed out there, but I think this time you can be a big girl about it. And don’t cook anything in the toaster because I don’t want the alarm to go off and make you get all scared again.
Love,
Sam
PS — Please stay away from my bunnies, because you just hug them so hard!
Wapner is at 3.
Jun 10, 2008 at 7:34 pm rating: 16
#23
Quite Contrary
Dear Sam,
Please go FUCK yourself.
Heart,
Katelyn
Jun 10, 2008 at 7:58 pm rating: 5
#24
Quite Contrary
Poor Katelyn. I had a very similar experience with a former roommate. Our PA standoff started with a note from the “cat” telling me that the litter box needed cleaning. At the end of said standoff, the note writer (not the cat) ended up giving me a week’s notice that she was moving out (never mind we had two months to go on a year’s lease), and wanted me out immediately and/or to find someone to take over the lease (she was too busy writing notes from the cat to help).
The cat and I stayed for the entire eight weeks.
Jun 10, 2008 at 8:15 pm rating: 3
#25
Lurker
“Kept” clean? If the sink is clean when she gets back, what does it matter if it’s “kept” clean the whole time she’s away?
Dear Sam,
My plan for making sure the trash is emptied is to make sure you empty it when you get back.
Jun 10, 2008 at 8:32 pm rating: 2
#26
Zorin
You’d think it’d be obvious that the trash needs emptying; I mean come on, the trash can will fill up and not magically empty itself anymore.
Rinsing dishes before putting them in the dishwasher? People still do that? I thought it was necessary for crappy dishwashers from the 70s; mine handles dirty dishes just fine. Get a new dishwasher, sheesh.
Jun 10, 2008 at 8:58 pm rating: 0
#27
secondsout
Katelyn… Does anyone else find the process of taking common names and giving them complicated spellings to be some pretentious shit? What’s wrong with the usual spelling Caitlin? You’ll see these names like Helyn, Ashleigh, or Kati. Seriously, spelling a name in some new way doesn’t make you look sophisticated; it makes you look like an arrogant prick.
Jun 10, 2008 at 9:01 pm rating: 8
#28
John in IL
We have a katlyn and a jaycee and braydon and a wtfkindanameisthat in my family. Future writers of PAN notes in the making.
Jun 11, 2008 at 1:01 am rating: 10
#29
TuesdayPillow
p.s. on your human calendar, June is my hubby-to-be. Teehee! Funny stuff!
Jun 11, 2008 at 2:41 am rating: 0
#30
Cricket
welcome to Awesometown.
Jun 11, 2008 at 6:24 am rating: 1
#31
Cricket
or…
welcome to Assholetown
depending on which side of the fence you’re on.
Jun 11, 2008 at 6:26 am rating: 0
#32
Cricket
or for the poor roommate trapped in the middle…
welcome to ThisFuckingSucksistan
Jun 11, 2008 at 6:27 am rating: 4
#33
Ryan
The most wicked notes I have seen on this page are the ones that the tone changes dramatically.
I gagged when I looked at those little passive aggressive smiley faces. I puked when I saw the ridiculous heart at the end!
My favorite part of the note was the author’s underlining of the word CLEAN. It’s as if to say, “Make it clean. My kind of clean – not what you consider clean.”
Later, rinse is underlined reminding Katelyn that one HAS to rinse!
With a note like that, you just leave it on the floor like it was blown there by a stray breeze.
Jun 11, 2008 at 8:40 am rating: 5
#34
einekleinetiger
So Katelyn responded to passive aggression with…. more passive aggression. Golfclaps, Katelyn.
Jun 11, 2008 at 9:43 am rating: 6
#35
DanOhh
P.P.S. Katelyn, please don’t forget to wipe your ass and flush the toilet when you done.
P.P.P.S. Oh, and don’t forget to wash your hands after that.
P.P.P.P.S. …
Jun 11, 2008 at 9:57 am rating: 3
#36
shauners
if only she’d signed off with “see you next tuesday!” instead. so close!
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=See-you-next-Tuesday
Jun 12, 2008 at 2:33 pm rating: 0
#37
Jim Beam Whiskey
It seems like so often these notes are directed at adults who should be capable of basic hygene.
I’d be ashamed if someone had to remind me not to be a slob.
Jun 12, 2008 at 2:39 pm rating: 0
#38
Amanda
Am I the only one on Team Not-Katelyn?
I’d love a little background refuting Sam’s claim that she’s always the one who does that stuff. The note was PA, but if it’s true, then Katelyn sucks, and her response to the note validates it.
Jun 12, 2008 at 5:30 pm rating: 1
#39
June
Whats wrong with asking your roommate to keep your apt clean? The messy roommate seems like a moocher. Get rid of her!!!
Jun 13, 2008 at 6:39 pm rating: 0
#40
Jais
How much of a slob must Katelyn be to elicit a note like this though?
If I were Sam, I would have left no note, and seen whether Katelyn can look after herself when she knows there’s nobody there to do it for her. Then if I came back to a putrid mess, I’d have evidence right there for a huge aggressive rant… none of this PAN stuff!
Jul 1, 2008 at 1:13 am rating: 1
#41
Jesse
Well thats the most rediculous reaction Ive ever heard of.
Jul 14, 2008 at 3:54 am rating: 0
#42 “so if you could go ahead and try to remember to do that from now on, that’d be great.”
[...] oh sweetie, i love it when you talk dirty! extra credit: TPS report cover sheet digg_skin = ‘compact’; reddit! stumble [...]
Jul 24, 2008 at 12:06 am rating: 0
#43
erin
aww, how sweet.
it reminds me of the notes my mom would leave me back in high school.
Aug 16, 2008 at 12:10 am rating: 0
#44 the sink half-empty | passive-aggressive (and just plain aggressive) notes
[...] related: oh sweetie, i love it when you talk dirty! [...]
Sep 4, 2008 at 9:49 pm rating: 0
#45
best
Thats right.
Sep 17, 2008 at 12:19 am rating: 0
#46
best
thank you.
Sep 17, 2008 at 1:20 am rating: 0
#47
premium
I feel the same.
Sep 26, 2008 at 7:07 am rating: 0
Comments are Closed