given the highly intellectual discussions this site’s commenters have become known for, it seems safe to assume that the question “how are we to judge poetry?” is one that you, dear reader, have no doubt pondered on many an occasion, along with other more academic concerns such as the proper resting state of the toilet lid.
well, as the late philip larkin once said, “i think a poet should be judged by what he does with his subjects, not by what his subjects are.” with that in mind, which of these poets would you judge “less likely to make you totally vom”?
is it this one, from a university campus in toronto?
…or is it this one, spotted by kacey at the ymca in the university town of champaign, illinois?
related: a limerick
extra credit: the poet of dirty words: reconsidering philip larkin [slate.com]
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220 responses so far ↓
#1 aaa
All we need to know is that poetry blows.
Oh, and this:
http://www.threadless.com/product/548/Shakespeare_Hates_Your_Emo_Poems
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:21 pm rating: +1
#2 Kev Orng
That first one was written with a grant from Heritage Canada.
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:24 pm rating: +20
#3 Mark
One of my favorite bathroom graffitis from college:
“Flush twice, it’s a long way to CK”
(CK = Central Kitchen, the root of all evil, where most of the crappy food is made)
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:24 pm rating: +4
#4 Mark
Why is the first note cut out to look like a puddle of jizz?
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:25 pm rating: +7
#5 Sirius
Both of these poems make me want to strangle the poet (and no, that’s not a euphemism for what I usually do in the stall).
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:26 pm rating: +21
#6 crunchy granola
forget about the horrible poetry… i think al gore would be disappointed if you flush three times every time you drop a deuce
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:27 pm rating: +51
#7 Mishee
As long as there isn’t any snarky poems about not doing drugs, I am fine with these bathroom rules…
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:27 pm rating: +11
#8 shane
Nauseating. Right up there with “If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie”.
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:33 pm rating: +4
#9 jfruh
Apparently “here” and “air” rhyme in Canada? It really is a different country up there!
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:37 pm rating: +7
#10 SomeGuyWhoNeverComments
That shit really stinks.
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:46 pm rating: +9
#11 Canthz_B
Shit, flush, flush, wipe, flush?
This project is becoming too complicated and I’m losing interest in it.
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:48 pm rating: +51
#12 bean
Is the second author going to pick up my poo and bring it back to me if I don’t flush three times?
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:52 pm rating: +4
#13 jimmyjimmyjimmyjimmy
“or all you’ve done comes back to you” Christ, I only wanted to do a shit and now and now I’m being lectured about everything wrong I’ve done in my life
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:53 pm rating: +8
#14 Canthz_B
Our “poet #1″ has posted the resume she submitted to Proctor and Gamble for a job as a Professional Sniffer in the deodorant division.
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:56 pm rating: +2
#15 shane
I hear they also have an opening as Feminine Hygiene Bin Monitor. Casey, can you confirm?
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:58 pm rating: +20
#16 amazon
I vote for #2 (tee hee). Afterall, brevity is the soul of wit.
p.s. What’s up with the Brit’s getting a different title and cover for their version of the PAN book??
Jul 22, 2008 at 4:59 pm rating: +3
#17 The Modern Gal
They could have at least obeyed the rules of rhythm and meter.
Jul 22, 2008 at 5:01 pm rating: +3
#18 tk.
The “rhyming” in the first one hurts to read. “Ail ye” and “daily”? Totally vom.
Jul 22, 2008 at 5:07 pm rating: +2
#19 Ryan
Do you know what “ails” me? Shitty Poetry.
Jul 22, 2008 at 5:08 pm rating: +7
#20 Em Tee
Both hurt my soul. What happened to the fine art of the haiku?
Your poo is smelly
I will hunt you if needed
Learn to flush Bitches
Clever it ain’t, but brevity tastes good.
Jul 22, 2008 at 5:13 pm rating: +31
#21 Candice