what do you do when words alone can’t express the depth of your feeling? in the business world, you turn to clip art. and specifically, you turn to screen beans.
if you’ve seen a powerpoint presentation in the last decade, you’re most likely familiar with screen beans, the clip art collection that will not die.
says one fan: “screen beans are GREAT! they have personality! you have to have imagination and a sense of humor to appreciate them.” you do not, however, have to be an english speaker.
our anonymous submitter from norway found this sign in a dirty corner of a factory where he’s been working this summer. (loose translation from the norwegian: IF YOU FEEL THE URGE TO PEE, USE A TOILET. THIS IS NOT THE RIGHT PLACE.)
“the really funny thing about it,” our submitter says, “is that someone has peed (several times) on the actual sign!”
related: stop! in the name of clip art
extra credit: absolute powerpoint [thenewyorker.com]
powerpoint is evil [wired.com]
77 responses so far ↓
#1
zombieBlanco
Unwanted beverages in the water fountain inconsiderate? Yes. Unsanitary? Not so much. Unless, of course, the unwanted ‘beverage’ is pee.
Aug 11, 2008 at 7:57 pm rating: +12
#2
Stitchin-Liz
Please tell me that’s not a factory that makes edible items!
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:05 pm rating: +1
#3
Wade
The first screen bean looks like it represents discarding a beverage on the Wicked Witch of the West.
“I’m melting!”
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:06 pm rating: +9
#4
Mishee
I prefer to spit in the water fountain, thank you very much.
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:08 pm rating: +6
#5
snee
if i could aim, i’d pee on that sign too.
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:09 pm rating: +6
#6
snee
gee, those screen beans have long, pointy noses. those are noses, aren’t they?
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:15 pm rating: +3
#7
lisa
I don’t think it’s people pouring their drinks in the fountain that makes it unsanitary (come on, it’s not noodle soup or anything) .
Now, the people that can only drink from a fountain if they are frenching/deep-throating the spigot…
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:15 pm rating: +2
#8
Quite Contrary
Somehow I’m relieved they peed on the sign, versus the other option(s) they had.
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:16 pm rating: 0
#9
Quite Contrary
Please do not use this clip art!
It is Unsanitary and Inconsiderate!
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:17 pm rating: +13
#10
mlo
The first screen bean is a little flamboyant for my lite beer drinkin, America lovin tastes. It looks like it just found out David Gest and Eliza Minnelli were getting divorced. The etc. at the end of the beverage list makes me wonder if I could discard of my skanky bottle of water in the fountain.
All That Unnecessary Capitalization Really Underscores How Lame The Note Really Is.
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:24 pm rating: +3
#11
amy d
What’s the problem? I love the smell of Norwegian pee in the morning.
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:24 pm rating: +2
#12
zombieBlanco
screen beans
bean on the right — troy mcclure
bean on the left — everyone else
Aug 11, 2008 at 8:28 pm rating: +9
#13
RALPHY
Those signs take all the fun out of my draining my lizard. Can I at least sit on the fountain and blast a fart into the next county—OOOOOPS, there was a surprise in that one—-excuse please.
Aug 11, 2008 at 9:05 pm rating: +1
#14
aaa
Well, big bold yellow letters on an orange and black background weren’t enough to keep me from peeing in a corner, but now that I see Pinocchio pointing at the ground accusingly, I’ll just hold my bladder until I get to a proper toilet. Or a sink. Whichever I get to first.
Aug 11, 2008 at 9:11 pm rating: +3
#15
marlo
Pee in the fountain and dump coffee on the sign.
Aug 11, 2008 at 9:36 pm rating: +1
#16
PandoraWombat
Disposing of beverages in the water fountain is inconsiderate? Inconsiderate to whom? The water fountain? Just wondering.
Aug 11, 2008 at 9:46 pm rating: +4
#17
RunBarbara
The clip art on the first sign looks like its running from a bomb scare, not a clogged water fountain. Unless a water fountain is clogged with rotting flesh, flies and the vomit of Vikings, I probably wont break a sweat to get away from it and I certainly wont alarm others with dramatic posturing.
That is just Inconsiderate.
Aug 11, 2008 at 9:49 pm rating: +6
#18
Miss Unloop
Discarding beverages in the water fountain makes Cyrano DeBergerac run screaming!
Aug 11, 2008 at 9:54 pm rating: +3
#19
Miss Unloop
In Soviet Russia sign pees on YOU.
Aug 11, 2008 at 11:04 pm rating: +7
#20
Canthz_B
Clearly, improper disposal of inappropriate beverages results in the sky falling.
Aug 11, 2008 at 11:05 pm rating: +5
#21
James
Alls they gotta do is stick a live car battery behind that sign and *bam!*
Sir Piss-a-lot has learned his lesson, and they can go back to pickling herring, or… whatever country that does that can… keep doing that unabated, I guess.
I’m so tired.
Aug 11, 2008 at 11:08 pm rating: +5
#22
Miss Unloop
When the Olympic characters get fat and retire, they become Screen Beans.
Aug 11, 2008 at 11:16 pm rating: +7
#23
Crinkle Crinkle
Water fountain Bean was a carefree, supple sprout who would oft abandon his Bean Jeans and run with gay abandon into the wild blue sea.
His brother Pee Bean was a stern, authoritarian stalk, given to much chest puffing and finger waggin at assorted Norwegian cocks.
Aug 12, 2008 at 4:48 am rating: +17
#24
Holiday Djinn
I cannot bring my food into the bathroom with me because of dogs, and now i cannot dump my unused beverage in the drinking fountain? What kinda jerks are these people?
Aug 12, 2008 at 7:15 am rating: +2
#25
claw71
You know what else has personality? No, not the ant with high apple pie in the sky hopes…I’m talking about the Lohan family. Britney Spears and K-Fed also have personality. Diddy has personality. You see personality isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. So the next time you’re putting together a training presentation you might want to think about that before you click on the Screen Beans folder.
Aug 12, 2008 at 8:18 am rating: +5
#26
dan
det er riktig du skitne dyr!
Aug 12, 2008 at 9:37 am rating: 0
#27
unholyghost2003
There seems to be a fairly large variety of these “screen beans” so why is it that when ever I have seen one of these things the posture and intent of the bean is always totally unrelated to the written content?
Aug 12, 2008 at 9:42 am rating: +2
#28
thirty six red
It needs the word POOP written on it in fecal scrawl- where is that guy when you need him?
Aug 12, 2008 at 10:01 am rating: +1
#29
Grade Ape
Someone is bound to say it, so I might as well be the unoriginal ass… In the words of Mr. Costanza, “It’s all pipes!”
I admit that I’ve used a drinking fountain as a sink. At least when I tire of my cold coffee I don’t drop the half full cup in the trash can. Or even worse, place it gently in the trash to make sure it stays upright… I can’t stand when people do that shit.
Team Eradicate Garbage Water!
Aug 12, 2008 at 11:22 am rating: 0
#30
zombieBlanco
Liquids combined with dry garbage combine to form garbage juice, not the aforesaid previously mentioned garbage water.
Doesn’t garbage juice sound so much yummier?
Aug 12, 2008 at 12:51 pm rating: 0