edward says this sign was posted on every floor and inside all the elevators at the hotel that headquartered ucla’s study abroad program in granada, spain last semester.
can you blame them? i mean, really — what a waste of perfectly good manchego!
just doing their part to uphold the reputation of americans abroad
September 2nd, 2008 · 119 comments
FILED UNDER: actually totally reasonable · cheese · espana · exclamation-point happy! · noise · spain · university
119 responses so far ↓
#1
zombieBlanco
The smeared cheese should have tipped the hotel staff off to the fact that this was a sneak attack by visiting UW Badgers. Long and storied is the Bruins/Badgers overseas rivalry.
Sep 2, 2008 at 8:33 pm rating: +21
#2
Pwntastic
do not smear cheese on the hotel’s doors, it hurts the hotel’s feelings
Sep 2, 2008 at 8:40 pm rating: +4
#3
zombieBlanco
✔ annoying music
✔ cheap booze
¿ spreadable cheese
Sep 2, 2008 at 8:42 pm rating: +16
#4
Canthz_B
Dear Hotel,
While we recognize that European cheeses have strange aromas, be advised that that was not cheese but whiz!
PS: Quiet celebrations are for pussies!
Party on, Dude!
Sep 2, 2008 at 8:50 pm rating: +21
#5
secondsout
It was garlic cheese, to keep away the French vampires.
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:01 pm rating: +8
#6
secondsout
No cheese on the door? How about peanut butter? What?? Stop holding my art down, man! The censors are always trying to shut down free expression and stuff.
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:02 pm rating: +11
#7
Ourhero
I wonder if there is a list of acceptable food products to rub on the doors.
Nothing says “celebration” like a good, old fashioned door rubbing.
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:03 pm rating: +16
#8
Canthz_B
We didn’t pay our hotel bills…we gave them cheese!
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:06 pm rating: +2
#9
Canthz_B
If you run a cheesy hotel, what do you expect?
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:07 pm rating: +19
#10
secondsout
Doesn’t say anything about spreading the cheese into the carpets. Party on!!
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:10 pm rating: +16
#11
Canthz_B
Shallow Cheese, we will wipe no cheese, before its time.
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:13 pm rating: +1
#12
Eric B.
UCLA students smear Kraft slices.
USC students smear Brie.
San Diego State students think cheese is fucking delicious.
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:14 pm rating: +8
#13
B Rad
You can order last night’s episode of “UCLA Students” for only 30 EUROS!!
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:22 pm rating: +6
#14
Troy McClure
The hotelier from Grenada
Was all “don’t smear the cheese, yadda yadda”
We’re just showin’ you dudes
How to party with foods
But don’t thank us, really; de nada
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:40 pm rating: +36
#15
Canthz_B
I was in a hotel lobby in Grenada
Just sitting reading the day’s Pravda.
On the glass doors men spread cheese,
Shouted I, “Boys! Stop! Please”,
The example set, they shouldn’t've oughtta!
Should be nested under Troy’s #14.
Sep 2, 2008 at 9:49 pm rating: +3
#16
zombieBlanco
Uhhh, hi — Mom?
I was kinda hoping you could, like, ummm wire me 50 dollars?
Well, we had a party last night — no, nobody’s hurt…no, nobody’s in jail.
We….we, ummm, got a little out-of-control…and…well…we, like, spread ummmm cheese — yah, I said cheese
We spread cheese over the hotel doors and now they want us to pay extra to have it cleaned!
Mom? Mom?
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:06 pm rating: +12
#17
0falcon8
Our dairy brethern will not be oppressed!!!
Viva la gorganzola!!!
UCLA
United Cheese Liberation Army
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:09 pm rating: +37
#18
Quite Contrary
How did they know it was UCLA’s noise? Spain isn’t exactly known for its quiet evenings.
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:19 pm rating: +5
#19
Quite Contrary
How do you celebrate quietly?
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:20 pm rating: +3
#20
0falcon8
thirty euros for some windex and paper towels? did they have to import those from the HR bathroom?
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:21 pm rating: +5
#21
Quite Contrary
30 euros? Really? I’m accustomed to paying $1.99 for last night’s episode. Or $17.99 for a season.
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:24 pm rating: +3
#22
creamy
I am an elevator door, and I want the right to have free, consensual, dairy-oriented relations with the UCLA student of my choice.
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:34 pm rating: +15
#23
Mishee
As long as nobody was cutting the cheese, I think its all good…
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:37 pm rating: +5
#24
Kristin
Anyone interested in having a party? I live in the Dairy State, Wisconsin. I could get you a good deal on cheese!
Sep 2, 2008 at 10:38 pm rating: +1
#25
John in IL
How much noise can cheese spreading generate? My neighbors must hate me.
Sep 2, 2008 at 11:04 pm rating: +14
#26
Miss Unloop
Why the hotel doors? Did they run out of crackers?
Sep 2, 2008 at 11:23 pm rating: +3
#27
0falcon8
Cheeze Whiz – a Weapon of Glass Be Crustin’
Sep 2, 2008 at 11:28 pm rating: +6
#28
aaa
Does that mean we’re allowed to smear other smearables onto the doors?
Sep 2, 2008 at 11:47 pm rating: 0
#29
snee
now i’ve got all this cheese and nowhere to smear it!
fascists.
Sep 3, 2008 at 1:06 am rating: +4
#30
snee
this note was posted by order of le grand fromage.
Sep 3, 2008 at 1:33 am rating: +5
#31
Claire
What college student can afford real cheese? Gads! You mean Customs did not confiscate the cans of cheese spread in the bags of these Californian scholars?
I can see the List of Things Not to Bring Abroad increasing……
Sep 3, 2008 at 1:34 am rating: +1
#32
Claire
Perhaps it was the combination of cheap Spanish champagne and the urge to leave some sort of calling card on the hotel doors that led to this international incident…
“Damn! I don’t have any business cards yet! But I do have lots of brie in my pockets…hmmm…what to do? What to do?”
Sep 3, 2008 at 1:36 am rating: +1
#33
gwennie
To all cheese users: Plz don’t leave your cheese unattended in the microwave. The north-side of the hotel has been complaining about the smell.
Thx
Sep 3, 2008 at 5:57 am rating: +7
#34
Pinkerton
UCLA students making too much noise? They must’ve been chewing their organic granola too loudly.
Sep 3, 2008 at 8:34 am rating: +2
#35
GhostWriter
…it’s all right here, in the Necronomicon…
(23) The ancient scrolls foretold the high priests of the Sepharon Guild would conjure the unholy embodiment of His great Slayer, Taurus the Betrayed.
(24) …and yea, how he shall wreak havoc throughout the Kingdom, and wailing shall be heard into the night, and blind justice shall flow like the blood of the disbelievers.
(25) If whoever shall place the sign of the contented calf upon their door, they shall be spared this eternal torment.
(26) So the students of Sepharon did follow with wise atonement, and smeared cheese upon each door of their dwelling, so they were spared.
Sep 3, 2008 at 10:14 am rating: +17
#36
jon
team hotel.
fucking assholes smearing cheese should be forced to lick it off.
I’m just not a fan of people having a jolly merry time at the expense of others.
Sep 3, 2008 at 10:48 am rating: +6
#37
Joy McGreedy
Dear Fellow Congregation Members (All 200 of you,)
Come join us to celebrate little Mandee’s 1st birthday! We know you will be thrilled to gawk and stare at our one year old baby! Please RSVP so we will know how many cucumber and spreadable cheese sandwiches to make. Thanks!
Sincerely,
Breeder Mom Whose World Revolves Around Her Childrun
Sep 3, 2008 at 11:48 am rating: +1
#38
Mongoliangirl
I just don’t want to know what kind of cheese it was.
Sep 3, 2008 at 12:01 pm rating: 0
#39
Tuesday
Wow, smearing cheese? Smearing manchego is quite a feat unless of course it’s melted. I’m wondering if it really was cheese or not … ew.
Brie handshake, anyone?
Sep 3, 2008 at 3:36 pm rating: 0
#40
Chloe
Party poopers. What’s an end-of-classes celebration without cheese-smearing?
Sep 3, 2008 at 4:08 pm rating: 0
#41
Abe Froman
At todays exchange rate the 30 Euros is equal to $43.50! When divided by all the UCLA students staying there, it seems like a small price to pay for the pleasure of smearing moldy, fermented dairy products! Hell, I’d pay fifty myself to get in a cheese wiz fight and not have to clean it up!
Sep 3, 2008 at 5:17 pm rating: 0
#42
aussielurker
The idea of spraying “cheese” from a can makes me nauseous in the extreme – honestly, no good has ever come out of applying artificial food additives with a gas propellent.
I hope the cheese in question was at least something genuine, like camembert or rochefort
Sep 3, 2008 at 6:51 pm rating: +2
#43
Woman on the Verge
The real problem is that there are no paper towels in the kitchen because they are all cavorting in the bathroom… which is why it is so expensive to clean the doors. The staff had to go buy all new kitchen paper towels and then keep them from defecting to the bathroom.
Sep 3, 2008 at 7:23 pm rating: +1
#44
Arthur
“I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all cheeses are created equal.’”
“I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former cheesemakers and the sons of former cheese eaters will be able to sit down together by the doors of cheese smearing.”
- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Sep 4, 2008 at 7:23 am rating: 0
#45
TheFlinFlonDrunk
Cheese… milk’s leap toward immortality.
Sep 4, 2008 at 10:02 am rating: +4
#46 are you proud to be an american?
[...] related: just doing their part to uphold the reputation of americans abroad [...]
Jul 4, 2009 at 3:44 pm rating: 0
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