Making time for the important things in life…like Facebook apps.

← The sink half-empty The PANtheistic approach →

Making time for the important things in life…like Facebook apps.

September 5th, 2008 · 65 comments

Spotted by an anonymous bullshit cop in Knoxville, Tennessee…

related: Facebook schoolyard smackdown

FILED UNDER: Facebook · Knoxville · smiley

65 responses so far ↓

#1 HairySwede

the have a nice day at the end seals it for me

Sep 5, 2008 at 1:30 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #1.1 Claire
  
  Clearly, Joni has waaaay too much time on her hands…
  
  While her child wails behind her, “Mummy! Please log off and fix us supper!”
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 2:48 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#2 bean

Because if she wanted middle school drama, she would be on myspace. Obviously, since she is on facebook, she has out grown childish things like that.

Sep 5, 2008 at 1:40 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#3 SF Iris

I think Joni has been in the company of children for too long because she is acting like one. Exhibit A: Egotistical status update. Exhibit B: Use of “frickin.” Exhibit C: Flair. Exhibit D: Nemo bumpersticker. I rest my case, your honor.

Sep 5, 2008 at 1:53 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #3.1 Claire
  
  Gasp! Could Joni possibly be a private school teacher carrying on an illicit affair with a student through her Facebook missives?
  
  Eeeewww!
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 2:49 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#4 Ti O

I really don’t care about Joni and her “Social Network” smackdowns. I hope she dies in a fiery crash. Have a nice Day!

Sep 5, 2008 at 2:04 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#5 0falcon8

Joni has packed up all the stupid ass middle school drama and it is sitting in the garage…come and get it asap….sick of all the lying and cheating…. 11:42am

Sep 5, 2008 at 2:18 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #5.1 Ti O
  
  Joni hates Chachi and is sick of the cheating and lying. Chachi’s shit is packed and sitting in the garage beneath his cousins Fonzie’s place.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 5:02 pm rating: 90
- #5.2 VentureSister
  
  Oh. My. I don’t care who you are, I think I have to marry you now. I was thinking something similar but I didn’t expect to find anyone else who thinks Happy Days when they hear ‘Joni’ even when it’s spelled wrong.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 9:49 pm rating: 90
- #5.3 Claire
  
  Joni sounds like she has hit middle-aged crisis and now has left her shit on Facebook.
  
  The garage in MySpace had Spanish cheese smeared on the door handles….
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 2:52 pm rating: 90
- #5.4 Ti O
  
  VS-
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 3:07 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#6 StaleCake

I just picture her adding her bumper stickers and facebook apps at the computer, while 20 feet away the child lies face-down in her Mr. Turtle Pool.
We can only hope!
Have a nice day!

Sep 5, 2008 at 2:21 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#7 Zsa

Don’t comment on the drama if you’re not going to put it out there for the entire world to see.

Or is this a way to get more friends on Facebook? Imply there is lots of nutso Drama… Learn more by “friending” me!

Sep 5, 2008 at 2:23 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #7.1 Mishee
  
  Zsa – I’ve tried to “friend” you many times, but you just ended up calling the cops and now I can’t come within 500 feet of you! WTF?
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 4:19 pm rating: 90
- #7.2 Zsa
  
  Mishee, what you want to do is NOT friendly!!!! Sick, twisted, dirty and rather fun… but not friendly.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 6:42 pm rating: 90
- #7.3 RandyinReno
  
  Mishee never forgot the kiss from EmmyLou Hayes on the school bus that day. It’s what friending is all about.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 8:27 pm rating: 90
- #7.4 HS
  
  the taste of her cherry chapstick…
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 8:46 pm rating: 90
- #7.5 Claire
  
  The taste of cherry chapstick…the scent of cheap drugstore perfume…mixed with the overpowering fumes of the diesel-fueled bus…aah…that would explain many things….
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 2:58 pm rating: 90
- #7.6 Mishee
  
  Zsa – RunBarbara had no problems with what I wanted to do!
  
  I guess that’s why I stalk her now, plus, she has very interesting stuff in her garbage can…
  
  Sep 7, 2008 at 11:18 am rating: 90
add to this thread
#8 commentator

Joni *should* be tired, she added the Pieces of Flair application at 3:09 a.m.! Doesn’t she have a child to worry about, or sleep?

Have a nice night.

Sep 5, 2008 at 2:26 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #8.1 Ourhero
  
  She does have a child to worry about,
  but that nutty crystal meth makes it hard to sleep.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 10:37 pm rating: 90
- #8.2 Claire
  
  Clearly, Joni needs an night of happy, grab-your-hair, romping, stomping sex instead of adding lonely Facebook applications to her Facebook page.
  
  Maybe it is time to introduce her to Candy?
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 3:00 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#9 Heather

If only she had Sarah Palin to help her with her child.

Sep 5, 2008 at 2:31 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #9.1 JoelWhy
  
  Yes, we need to make sure all of our Jebus-lovin’ kids get knocked up before they turn 18. Be fruitful and multiply!
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 7:01 pm rating: 90
- #9.2 Claire
  
  Well, those Alaskan summer evenings can be quite chilly…what’s a girl to do?
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 3:04 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#10 Dare

Joni was fucking delicious!

Sep 5, 2008 at 2:32 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #10.1 JesFoolin
  
  Joni’s child was fucking delicious.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 2:48 pm rating: 90
- #10.2 0falcon8
  
  and now, we have to haul out the rarely used duotard for the two of you
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 3:49 pm rating: 90
- #10.3 Ti O
  
  It has been a well established fact here that small children and babies are tasty indeed. The only thing not firmly established is whether slow roasting, Deep pit BBQ or slow smoking fire is best. Whatever leaves that tasty crispy skin I say!
  
  doucheotard for them both.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 6:09 pm rating: 90
- #10.4 Claire
  
  Oh, Dare…time to don the Unitard…let’s see…how many people have frolicked in the ole Unitard?
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 3:06 pm rating: 90
- #10.5 Jake
  
  if I say “The duotard was fucking delicious”, will you have to get out the triotard?
  
  Aug 14, 2009 at 1:27 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#11 zorinlynx

I’ve seen this so much. Person has a nice, quaint, fun to read blog, seems light hearted, posts fun things… etc…

Then all of a sudden they post a huge obscenity-filled explosion of drama.. Like it had been building up inside for weeks and just now exploded.

And of course within a day or so it gets taken down and an apology goes up, usually accompanied by a photo of someone else’s kitten.

Sep 5, 2008 at 2:35 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #11.1 Fresca
  
  Hey, it’s cheaper than therapy.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 2:57 pm rating: 90
- #11.2 aaa
  
  Yeah, but therapy generally doesn’t leave a trail of public humiliation in its wake. Like, your friends won’t think you’re dramatic freak and your future employers won’t be put off. Well, that is, if you keep the contents of your therapy private like you ought to. I’ve known a few people that somehow manage to air their dirty therapy laundry at every opportunity…
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 5:38 pm rating: 90
- #11.3 Claire
  
  I don’t know…I curse all the time in my blogs and no one has ever responded like this…of course, then, I don’t correspond with middle school students in the wee hours of the morning!
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 3:07 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#12 Sabrina

Must be nice being so mature that you write things on facebook instead of actually saying them in person.

Sep 5, 2008 at 4:12 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#13 Mishee

Yeah Joni – I’ve got your flair right here, bitch…

Sep 5, 2008 at 4:17 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#14 Quite Contrary

I don’t think Chachi deserved to be treated this way.

Sep 5, 2008 at 4:41 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #14.1 Ti O
  
  Chachi was a liar and a cheat. But then again Joanie was schlepping herself over to that deadbeat reprobate Arthur “Fonzie” Fonzerelli’s apartment above her parents garage. Yeah she was doing Chachi’s own cousin. What a silly Sally Slut Joanie was. She didn’t know it but at that very moment inside her one of Arther’s mongoloid sperm was piercing her eggs. In nine months she was to be giving birth to a whole new generation of gaped mouth leather wearing halfwits with unibrows. If she had only kept her eyes on Ralph Mouth. At least then they only would have been albino babies.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 5:12 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#15 Woman on the Verge

Um… Is Joni an afterschool special waiting to happen? Is she, in fact, a middle school drama queen who mothered a child? Will she ever get over it? Will she be able to parent her child and still feed her internet addiction? And finally, will she ever, really, be able to have a nice day?

Sep 5, 2008 at 4:55 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #15.1 Claire
  
  OMG!!! What if this was a response to the middle school-aged father of her child???? Joni! Sixteen will get you twenty!!!
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 3:09 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#16 aaa

Like OMFG, if you have more important things to worry about (like your child) then get the fuck off Facebook! LOL!

Sep 5, 2008 at 5:29 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#17 aaa

P.S.

Am I the only one who thinks this sounds like some adult with a child in some sort of inappropriate relationship with a middle schooler (or a high schooler s/he’s trying to shame)? Or have I been watching too much Law and Order: SVU?

Sep 5, 2008 at 5:32 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #17.1 Woman on the Verge
  
  I always call that damn show “SUV” – like all the crimes happen in Chevy Suburbans…
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 5:39 pm rating: 90
- #17.2 aaa
  
  Well, you know how those yuppies are. They’re always out and about murdering their children’s bullies and stalking those bitches who steal their parking spots in between their Starbucks runs.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 5:46 pm rating: 90
- #17.3 Miss Unloop
  
  Ummmm… O.J. Simpson, anyone?
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 6:54 pm rating: 90
- #17.4 HS
  
  to WOTV-
  I think you have alphabetical issues…
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 8:48 pm rating: 90
- #17.5 aaa
  
  Yeah, but OJ’s kinda passé now. Now we must lash back against the people whose standard of living we may or may not envy.
  
  Sep 5, 2008 at 9:36 pm rating: 90
- #17.6 Claire
  
  aaa, it could be just too much viewing of the ten o’clock news you are taking in there….
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 3:11 pm rating: 90
- #17.7 Claire
  
  Aah, but in Texas, high school cheerleading moms do so like to take out the mothers of the daughter’s competition….I don’t think that statement even made sense…Whoa, y’all!
  
  Sep 6, 2008 at 5:51 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#18 secondsout

I figure Joni is tired from paving paradise and putting up parking lots.

Sep 5, 2008 at 6:02 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#19 Quite Contrary

What’s with the “Have a nice day” AND a smiley after “Get over it and leave me alone.” Don’t those cancel each other out, meaning she’s totally back into the middle school drama?

Sep 5, 2008 at 6:47 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#20 Miss Unloop

Joni,

As far as the supid-ass middle school drama goes:

Keep on swimming, girl.

Love,

Unloop

Sep 5, 2008 at 6:58 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#21 Abe Froman

I have more important things to think about than your stupid facebook apps and stickers! Like, what new middle school drama is happening on PAN, for example.

Sep 5, 2008 at 7:41 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#22 Jeff

Does anyone else HATE it when your friend’s status isn’t a correct sentence? They put your name so you can be like “Jeff is…” or “Jeff wants…”

In this case, with the way Facebook formats it, it just looks like bad grammar.

Or maybe I’m just a loser.

Sep 6, 2008 at 9:43 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#23 Mung Bean

“…and I will name him Squishy, and he shall be mine, and he shall be my Squishy.”

Damn, I need to hide that DVD from the kids. I’m quoting it in my sleep.

Sep 6, 2008 at 3:09 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#24 Claire

Perhaps Joni needs a penpal…..one who can help her improve on her middle school drama…and to use more socially appropriate adjectives than just “fucking”…

Sep 6, 2008 at 3:12 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#25 Boo

This post is lame. No wonder there are so few comments.

Sep 6, 2008 at 11:24 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #25.1 Canthz_B
  
  Yet you still felt compelled to post your lame opinion rather than find something original and humorous to say? Boo to you.
  
  Sep 7, 2008 at 4:09 am rating: 90
add to this thread
#26 Ourhero

twitter.com/Joni

about 12 hours ago from web.

I am still totally over the middle school drama from last June.

Sep 8, 2008 at 1:14 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#27 Jais

like omfg… having a child totally makes me soooo much more mature than you *rollz eyez*

Sep 8, 2008 at 1:29 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#28 no, really — it’s just research for my andrea dworkin paper!

[...] related: making time for the important things in life…like facebook apps [...]

Dec 12, 2008 at 2:25 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#29 busted by facebook

[...] making time for the important things in life…like facebook apps extra credit: bank intern busted by facebook [...]

Feb 25, 2009 at 4:50 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#30 What your Facebook “friends” are all secretly thinking about your whiny status updates. | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

[...] Busy, but not too busy for the important things in life…like Farmville. [...]

Dec 18, 2010 at 1:32 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#31 Joni needs | Bagelry

[...] Making time for the important things in life…like Facebook apps …Sep 5, 2008 … Clearly, Joni needs an night of happy, grab-your-hair, romping, stomping sex instead of adding lonely Facebook applications to her Facebook … [...]

Aug 30, 2012 at 3:25 am rating: 90

reply to this comment