at yale divinity school, the daily chapel service is followed by a coffee hour. apparently, says sara in new haven, “some who skip chapel were helping themselves to the goodies before the intended time. looks like the ‘keeper of the snacks’ has something to say about this.”
meanwhile, john in sudbury, mass. spotted this humble plea outside the local roman catholic church.
related: so much for turning the other cheek
81 responses so far ↓
#1
Quite Contrary
The Holy Spirit. Al Gore. I get them mixed up all the time.
Sep 7, 2008 at 10:56 am rating: +8
#2
HairySwede
Oh God… the Creator of passive-aggresiveness. And clearly a fan of His own work.
Sep 7, 2008 at 11:09 am rating: +11
#3
Mishee
God is so full of Himself!
Sep 7, 2008 at 11:15 am rating: +2
#4
gwennie
OMFG! God’s multiple personality disorder has advanced even further.
I mean, “Zeus version”? Hello?? Aren’t Jesus and the Holy Spirit enough?
Sep 7, 2008 at 11:17 am rating: +13
#5
Mishee
I’m thinking the Zeus reference would be considered blasphemy…
But that’s just me… In my opinion there is only one Holy and Almighty God…
and His name is Claw.
Sep 7, 2008 at 11:20 am rating: +4
#6
momentaryennui
when i first read the second note i thought it read,
“don’t make me pull out my lightning balls.”
i’m not really all that familiar with the bible or anything, but whoa, it made realize what all the fuss about the “Tha Passion of the Christ” might have been about. i get it now.
Sep 7, 2008 at 11:30 am rating: +24
#7
Ourhero
From stone tablets, to styrofoam plates…
You can tell it is really from god(s), from the
“don’t make me put my foot in your ass”
tone of the message.
Sep 7, 2008 at 11:49 am rating: +7
#8
Ti O
Many Schnacky cake thieves know what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor.
- Gozer
Sep 7, 2008 at 12:47 pm rating: +7
#9
SchrodingersDuck
I think Zeus’s problem is that he’s all too willing to “pull out his lightning bolt” - just ask Leda, Mnemosyne and Themis.
Sep 7, 2008 at 1:03 pm rating: +26
#10
se
So, did the traffic cones walk away? woudn’t that be a miracle? So this person who put up that second sign is trying to thwart the will of god?
Sep 7, 2008 at 1:05 pm rating: +3
#11
fantasy
Dear God,
Please, in the future will you not use the styrofoam plates? We all have to do our part in keeping the planet as pristine and beautiful as when you created it. “Think Green” is the new “11th Comandment.”
Thanks and Amen
……beautiful,pristine? oops, too late.
Sep 7, 2008 at 1:06 pm rating: +20
#12
Mishee
This is why I don’t listen to ANYTHING God tells me to do…
http://www.firstcoastnews.com/life/entertainment/news-article.aspx?storyid=118226
Sep 7, 2008 at 1:15 pm rating: 0
#13
Canthz_B
Charity begins at home, not at this chapel.
Sep 7, 2008 at 1:42 pm rating: +2
#14
Canthz_B
God’s act has lost something over the years. Now he uses a Sharpee instead of the much more impressive Burning Bush!
Sep 7, 2008 at 1:45 pm rating: +6
#15
Canthz_B
Following the directions of a heretic is a sin, therefore, I’ll take whatever I like!
Sep 7, 2008 at 1:50 pm rating: 0
#16
Canthz_B
Thou shalt not steal—my traffic cones.
–GOD
Sep 7, 2008 at 1:54 pm rating: +2
#17
secondsout
The holy spirit is everywhere? Even in that pile of dog shit on my back patio?
Sep 7, 2008 at 2:23 pm rating: +1
#18
secondsout
Did you really have to explain to the Yale divinity school students that the Holy Spirit is supposedly everywhere?
Sep 7, 2008 at 2:30 pm rating: +4
#19
fantasy
We need them traffic cones to direct you damn sinners to confession! We get quite a crowd on Saturday mornings, askin’ forgiveness for all them Friday nights! Drinkin’ and fornicatin’,molesting all the little children, my God get in line.
……. “Priests to the right, everyone else go to the confessional to the left.”
Sep 7, 2008 at 2:32 pm rating: +2
#20
Stringyhair
Dear God,
Thanks for the donut. That was delish and without you it wouldn’t be so. You are so God-like.
Amen
Sep 7, 2008 at 2:35 pm rating: +5
#21
agirlie
Dear God-
Please water your lawn.
–The neighborhood
Sep 7, 2008 at 2:36 pm rating: +15
#22
Toopillow
Dear god, the holy spirit, and others affiliated with omnipotence and omnipresence,
please stop looking at me when I take a shower, you prevert.
Sep 7, 2008 at 2:58 pm rating: +20
#23
Canthz_B
The Holy Spirit had better not be within 180 feet of me.
I have gotten a restraining order!
Sep 7, 2008 at 3:07 pm rating: +5
#24
LS77
Dear Gawd,
You are so nosy! Can’t you wait until I visit you on Sunday?
Sep 7, 2008 at 3:26 pm rating: +3
#25
Abe Froman
I guess all those years of preists molesting little boys has finally affected both god’s and the holy spirit’s ego, since they no longer capitalize their names.
Sep 7, 2008 at 3:36 pm rating: +3
#26
Wade
Their mistake was putting Bartleby and Loki in charge of the after-chapel snacks.
Sep 7, 2008 at 3:52 pm rating: +18
#27
bean
God,
If you are so almighty and omniscient, go find your traffic cones.
Sep 7, 2008 at 4:01 pm rating: +4
#28
Sabrina
I wonder if God had realized yet that his name is being forged….
Sep 7, 2008 at 4:05 pm rating: +1
#29
fantasy
I thought God put everything on this earth that is good, it shall be food he said, he didn’t say “No snack or muffins?”
“So who is the smartass who thinks he’s God!”
Sep 7, 2008 at 4:43 pm rating: 0
#30
fantasy
God said to eat of everything in the Garden except from the one tree.
I figure since Eve already did the god awful,it is every man for himself.
What’s done is done!
Sep 7, 2008 at 4:47 pm rating: +1
#31
amazon
Hostess donuts? Prepacked muffins and bagels? God’s kind of a cheapskate…
Sep 7, 2008 at 4:49 pm rating: +2