just be glad you don’t know what’s in the coffee

September 10th, 2008 · 167 comments

our submitter in london snapped a photo of this note in the kitchen of the PR agency where she works. exactly what you’d expect to find at office full of “communication professionals,” no?

related: switch to tea

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FILED UNDER: london · tea · u.k.

167 responses so far ↓

#1 erik

actually, that is pretty funny.

Sep 10, 2008 at 6:24 am rating: +15

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#2 gwennie

Those evil person(s) probably also cause unrest by putting olive oil with the EVOO…

If tea is their sole complaint, they most likely don’t have a microwave.

Sep 10, 2008 at 6:25 am rating: +19

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#3 Wade

I can understand their concern. The last time tea caused unrest didn’t turn out so well for the British.

Sep 10, 2008 at 6:36 am rating: +124

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- #3.1 James
  
  Ha! Take that 18th century England!
  Hope none of them surf the web.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 8:24 am rating: +13
- #3.2 Mishee
  
  Wade - We all know that was the Indians (feather, not dot) though… its not like WE did anything wrong…!
  
  (haha, one of those boats was called the Beaver - just thought I’d share)
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 9:09 am rating: +12
- #3.3 shane
  
  Since we’re debating history, it was the Colonists or Sons of Liberty “dressed” as Indians.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 9:52 am rating: +1
- #3.4 Mishee
  
  once again, sarcasm is lost through the internet.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:14 am rating: +27
- #3.5 shane
  
  not lost, bypassed to defend my fellow Natives’ honor.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:17 am rating: +11
- #3.6 claw71
  
  Those feather-plucking redskins didn’t have any honor, Shane. If they did God would have smiled upon them and they would have been part of manfiest destiny rather than victims of it.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:21 am rating: +10
- #3.7 Holiday Djinn
  
  Don’t fall into the Sar-chasm!!
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:34 am rating: +25
- #3.8 shane
  
  God had very little to do with the insatiable will of the white man to own everything they set foot on.
  
  Ya know, free will and all.
  
  Oh, and racism much?
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:38 am rating: +11
- #3.9 Mishee
  
  Well, I like to go out to the plains states and watch the neat Indian reenactments with the war dances, painted faces, teepees, and such… if only I didn’t have to actually go near those gross, scary reservations with all those dirty, poor people who live there… I mean… can’t the government do something about those people?
  
  Maybe open up a nice “Camp” and give them all jobs there…?
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:42 am rating: +7
- #3.10 Canthz_B
  
  God is a Racist, shane…ever heard of His “Chosen People”?
  
  WTF about everyone else?
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:51 am rating: +10
- #3.11 Ti O
  
  Like I tell rabid vegans; if it isn’t smart enough or quick enough to kill me first too bad you lose!
  
  Waaa waaa booo hooo European man had superior numbers and technology and defeated primitive thinking (sound familar?) native borns. They lost now shut up shuffle the cards and deal Tonto. I need a drink too where is the waitress?
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:54 am rating: +6
- #3.12 Mishee
  
  His brother is “Sits-With-Full-House”…
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:58 am rating: +3
- #3.13 takethelongroadtoapoint
  
  Shane- Giant leap away fron the point and into ‘hey lets pick an argument becuase I have nothing funny to say and this is a funny website and I feel bad about not being funny… I know- lets get all fake PC up in someone who IS funny, that will make me feel better- land”
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 11:07 am rating: +20
- #3.14 shane
  
  Actually, his given name is Keno.
  
  @evenlongerroadtoapoint - this website has the freedom to express whatever snarky comment I desire, whether it’s funny in your self righteous mind or not. Congrats to you for failing at sarcasm.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 11:09 am rating: +12
- #3.15 Ti O
  
  I loved Bob Saget on that show.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 11:13 am rating: +8
- #3.16 secondsout
  
  Actually, God’s will sounds like a better argument than better technology or primitive thinking. The main contributing factor to white people sweeping across the US and defeating the Indians was disease. The Europeans brought over tons of diseases that the Indians had no immunity for.
  
  Speaking of white people with tons of diseases, if you ever visit RB’s mom, be sure to wear a kitchen glove when fisting. That woman is like the monkey on Outbreak.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 2:55 pm rating: +5
- #3.17 claw71
  
  Shane’s got to be a Jew. Those damned Heebs are always taking the Injun’s side because they both have big ugly noses. I know he’s not black because I didn’t see any chicken grease on his post. I bet he’s gay, too. A stinking Jew butt pirate. God, I hope Huckabee wins this election.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 3:04 pm rating: +5
- #3.18 Canthz_B
  
  Actually, God had a lot to do with European expansionism, by the way.
  The mission of spreading the gospel was part and parcel of the mission of conquest and empire building. “Civilizing” the natives was to be accomplished by Christianizing them.
  
  see spanish missions on the west coast of amrica and active missionary activity in the world today.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 3:16 pm rating: +2
- #3.19 claw71
  
  You’ll praise Jesus or else.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 3:21 pm rating: +1
- #3.20 anglophile
  
  Glory be to Else!
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 3:34 pm rating: +28
- #3.21 se
  
  wrong comment….
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 4:33 pm rating: 0
- #3.22 James
  
  You’d all better get some perspective before the inevitable happens. (http://hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com/)
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:52 pm rating: 0
- #3.23 Canthz_B
  
  Whatever happens…it’s God’s will, James.
  All of Man’s freedom of choice leads in the direction of God’s Plan.
  If not…God has NO Plan.
  If He’s not in control then He is NOT omnipotent.
  If He’s not omnipotent, then He’s not a God and our free will was not granted by Him.
  
  In short…if you have free will, there is no God.
  If God controls His plan, you have NO free will.
  
  Wrap your mind around it and let it marinade for a spell.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 11:40 pm rating: +4
- #3.24 Canthz_B
  
  “God does not play dice with the universe.”
  
  –Albert Einstein
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 11:46 pm rating: +1
- #3.25 bellabeastie
  
  Totally a mind-full, CB. whoo.
  
  Can I get back to you on this?
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 11:52 pm rating: +1
- #3.26 Canthz_B
  
  Of course, bb.
  I sure as hell took mine. You’ve got an entire life-time to do so, as have we all.
  
  Sep 11, 2008 at 12:03 am rating: +1
- #3.27 Canthz_B
  
  I meant “Take your time…I sure as hell took mine”…years, in fact.
  
  Be Blessed?!
  
  Sep 11, 2008 at 12:10 am rating: +1
- #3.28 Canthz_B
  
  Just don’t tell me that my wife’s death was God’s will and simultaneously claim that she had any free will in the matter.
  
  The two are mutually exclusive.
  
  Sep 11, 2008 at 12:23 am rating: +2
- #3.29 Jais
  
  Mmm…. peppermint tea….
  
  Sep 11, 2008 at 12:55 am rating: +1
- #3.30 Holiday Djinn
  
  I disagree w/ Einstein on this. As I look around at the universe i see a lot of craps.
  
  Sep 11, 2008 at 7:44 am rating: +3
- #3.31 Canthz_B
  
  Old Al was known to be wrong from time to time. It’s all relative!
  
  Sep 11, 2008 at 11:22 am rating: +2
- #3.32 MissD.
  
  Now it is such a bizarrely impossible coincidence that anything so mind-bogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the nonexistence of God. The argument goes something like this:
  
  “I refuse to prove that I exist,” says God, “for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.”
  
  “But,” say Man, “the Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn’t it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don’t. QED.”
  
  “Oh dear,” says God, “I hadn’t though of that” and promply vanishes in a puff of logic.
  
  Thank God for the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy…
  
  Sep 15, 2008 at 9:21 am rating: 0
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#4 anglophile

The careful use of the (s) leads me to wonder if the note writer envisioned a network of tea-corrupters intent on destroying the purity of tea everywhere. Who knows what the next step will be? Chai mixed up with the Earl Grey? Chamomile in with the Russian Caravan? Black Currant polluting the Lapsang Souchong? The mind recoils from such horror.

Sep 10, 2008 at 6:53 am rating: +40

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- #4.1 claw71
  
  I’ll tell you what, Anglophile, I wouldn’t mind polluting your Lapsang Souchong. Grrrrrr, baby, yeah
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:19 am rating: +10
- #4.2 anglophile
  
  Er, I’m pretty sure you already have, claw.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 12:37 pm rating: +1
- #4.3 claw71
  
  Oh…well then, was it good for you, babe?
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 3:04 pm rating: +1
- #4.4 anglophile
  
  I don’t recall. Let’s review the tapes, shall we?
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 4:30 pm rating: +1
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#5 Holiday Djinn

Wow, Unrest eh?

When I hear unrest I think police action beatings, crowds going unruly, riot police, smoke grenades, firetruck hoses going full blast, aging regimes trying to keep power through force.

You know, a typical Saturday night at Mishee’s!

Sep 10, 2008 at 6:54 am rating: +4

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- #5.1 Mishee
  
  HD - you have no idea…
  
  Don’t forget the Mexican music playing the background constantly, empty cans of Modelo beer flying off the balconies onto our front lawn (ok… front dirt), and of course, barefoot children robbing you at knife point…
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 9:02 am rating: +4
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#6 passive-aggressive fame «

[...] September, 2008 by blue soup Passive-Aggressive notes has posted my submission of the note in the kitchen that made me laugh on the day of my third-round interview at PR [...]

Sep 10, 2008 at 6:59 am rating: 0

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#7 TygerAKC

I like how someone scribbled out the “Not” showing that they think it IS funny!

Sep 10, 2008 at 7:34 am rating: +1

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- #7.1 secretrebel
  
  But in a very light-weight passive aggressive way!
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 1:09 pm rating: +1
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#8 Canthz_B

And thus the War of the (Four) Roses was begun…

Sep 10, 2008 at 7:54 am rating: +7

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- #8.1 Canthz_B
  
  Oh, snap! The tea I had in mind is “Red Rose”…”Four Roses” is my grandpa’s old bourbon!
  The things we mix in our minds as children, eh?
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 4:58 pm rating: 0
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#9 Canthz_B

Unrest? I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it.

Sep 10, 2008 at 7:59 am rating: +1

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#10 Lola Snow

Far funnier when swap is made by putting expresso in the decaf container!

Sep 10, 2008 at 8:12 am rating: +17

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- #10.1 Mark
  
  That’s espresso! Not x, s!
  
  (says the Seattleite)
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:39 am rating: +5
- #10.2 Ti O
  
  I think EXpresso is a brand of laxative.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 10:57 am rating: +4
- #10.3 Canthz_B
  
  Espresso is a laxative as well.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 2:57 pm rating: +3
- #10.4 JoeInLA
  
  No, “expresso” is what happens when you TAKE a laxative.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 5:51 pm rating: +1
- #10.5 phoeniX
  
  so 6 shots of espresso would then become an EXpresso?
  
  fun in a cup!
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 8:03 pm rating: +1
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#11 claw71

Office unrest? In London? Surely the maximum extent of this alleged unrest would be the posting of a note such as the one seen here. OOOOOH. So scary. In Scotland hooligans would pound each other. Here in the States we’d dress up like Indians and dump the tea into the ocean and if this had happened in Northern Ireland throats would be slit and bombs would be detonated. That’s unrest. London. Please. Here’s a thought, Liam, take a whiff of the tea bag before you steep it. Peppermint is pretty hard to miss unless you have some sort of olfactory disorder in which case you probably wouldn’t notice the difference anyway. And get your teeth fixed, you limey fop.

Sep 10, 2008 at 8:37 am rating: +29

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- #11.1 amy d
  
  Claw posted a short comment? The tea unrest is causing disruption far and wide!
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 9:43 am rating: +2
- #11.2 claw71
  
  Kerry sent me an email and told me if I didn’t trim down my posts she’d have to block me. It wasn’t the tea unrest.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 9:48 am rating: 0
- #11.3 shane
  
  Hmmm, teabagging, pounding each other, dressing up like Indians. Someone already mentioned Mishee’s Saturday nights.
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 9:57 am rating: +16
- #11.4 sos
  
  teabagging. ahahahahahaha!
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 11:16 am rating: +1
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#12 GhostWriter

Hargreeves did it again.

He didn’t finish his product placement report, so instead of attending the department meeting, he concocted an outrageous tale of being “…allergic to peppermint tea” and that somebody slipped him a “not-funny” tea bag.
Now, he’s off on a recuperation holiday, and I’m doing his report.

Whatever, Hargreeves- just WHATEVER!

Sep 10, 2008 at 8:56 am rating: +15

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- #12.1 claw71
  
  I love messing with people who have allergies. I had this regional manager who had a serious peanut allergy so I kept a jar of Planter’s dry roasted peanuts in my desk. Whenever he’d waddle his soft corporate ass in my office I’d break that jar out and throw peanuts at his feet. Dance, peanut boy, dance! Who’s failing to meet performance benchmarks now? TELL ME!!!
  
  Sep 10, 2008 at 9:11 am rating: +25

painfully polite and hilariously hostile writings from shared spaces the world over

just be glad you don’t know what’s in the coffee

September 10th, 2008 · 167 comments

167 responses so far ↓