(My roommate disagreed.)
Now it’s my turn: Happy birthday, Kim! (emoticon emoticon emoticon)
related: an occasion that blue mountain arts has yet to animate
extra credit: cake wrecks
“I don’t need a birthday cake,” I said.
September 12th, 2008 · 112 comments
FILED UNDER: birthday · brooklyn · cake · new york · park slope · roommates · smiley
112 responses so far ↓
#1
Grade Ape
and fuck you back… I left a fat, tightly coiled log on top of it.
Sep 12, 2008 at 9:52 am rating: +9
#2
Mishee
hmmm, I could have sworn I told Kim I was allergic to chocolate! oh shit, I think she’s trying to kill me…
I suppose I should keep my hands off her man from now on…
Sep 12, 2008 at 9:56 am rating: +13
#3
Mishee
at least even with the small (yet kind of weird looking) yellowish surface space that kim had to work with, she still didn’t resort to chatspeak! Go Kim!
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:00 am rating: +25
#4
Cassandra
Nothing says “Happy Birthday” like dropping the f-bomb! I think the roommate must be one of my cousins.
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:10 am rating: +8
#5
Potty Mouth
Not looking so yummy! Maybe see wanted a ckae just not one of Kim’s?
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:11 am rating: 0
#6
gingerE
Kim really needed an excuse to cheat on her diet.
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:16 am rating: +3
#7
monstrosity
Is that yellow square supposed to look like a post-it? If so, bravo.
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:17 am rating: +62
#8
zenvelo
I don’t think that I could take it,
‘cuz it took so long to bake it,
and I’ll never have that recipe again…….
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:24 am rating: +10
#9
Pwntastic
2 girls 1 cake?
I don’t trust it.
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:30 am rating: +33
#10
Canthz_B
I know it can be done for a pie because I saw the movie…but how do you make a cake happy?
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:37 am rating: +2
#11
RunBarbara
This cake makes me uncomfortable. Maybe its the viral looking blob of peanut butter (?) in the middle or maybe its just the ultra glossy “icing”. Either way, the real birthday present would be not having to eat it.
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:42 am rating: +7
#12
Jimmy Straightline
Next time I’m in Hallmark for that special occasion, I’ll have to check out the “Fuck You” section of greeting cards.
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:43 am rating: +27
#13
Ti O
To my very special girl…
*opens card*
Fuck you and happy birthday!
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:47 am rating: +5
#14
Ti O
Look I got you “Fudgie” the Fuck you cake for your birthday!
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:50 am rating: +24
#15
madison
This is from Kerry’s (pan goddess) photo album. I think Kim made the cake for her birthday and now it is Kim’s day to celebrate.
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:56 am rating: +6
#16
Canthz_B
Mmm…chocolate and government cheese cake! Looks like something served up in the Good Times apartment for JJ’s Birthday.
Sep 12, 2008 at 11:03 am rating: +8
#17
0falcon8
fuck you! i took a shit in a pan, spread my yeast infection on top, and guess what? my period came early!
enjoy!
Sep 12, 2008 at 11:22 am rating: +6
#18
finikki
Wow, passive aggressive baking. It’s like a whole new domestic world has just opened up!
Next up:
-PAlaundry (sorry honey, I forgot to wash your golf pants)
-PAshowering (sorry honey, I forgot to shave my underarms)
-PAgroceries (sorry honey, I forgot to buy beer)
-PAtelevision (sorry honey, I forgot to record the game)
And the grand master of domestic PA:
-PAsex (sorry honey, I forgot to take aspirin)
Sep 12, 2008 at 11:43 am rating: +1
#19
Quite Contrary
The roommate never said she made a good cake.
Sep 12, 2008 at 11:43 am rating: +2
#20
Goldie
You guys do realize there are no candles on the cake YET? Stephen King’s “Misery” comes to mind. If I were the birthday girl, I’d guard my thumbs like hell and prepare to run when the roommate comes in with a saw.
Sep 12, 2008 at 11:48 am rating: +1
#21
secondsout
this cake is brilliant. Kudos to Kim!
Sep 12, 2008 at 12:33 pm rating: +2
#22
Chinchillazilla
Aww, I think it’s cute.
Sep 12, 2008 at 12:38 pm rating: +4
#23
Fresca
Team Roommate! That cake is awesomeness.
Sep 12, 2008 at 1:15 pm rating: +7
#24
GhostWriter
You can’t just whip up a batch of Rice Crispy Treats, cover them with Hershey’s syrup, lay down a slab of fine creamery butter, and call it a “Birthday Cake!”
Sep 12, 2008 at 1:58 pm rating: +2
#25
Boo_Radley
Ooooooh, A post it!!! I thought it looked like a Kraft (TM) single with ketchup on it.
Sep 12, 2008 at 2:14 pm rating: +1
#26
Ryan
To quote our friend Ash from Army of Darkness….
“Don’t, it’s a trick!”
Sep 12, 2008 at 3:37 pm rating: 0
#27
toadmama
That’s awesome!
Sep 12, 2008 at 5:36 pm rating: +1
#28
claw71
I think this is exactly the sort of thing that got Marie Antoinette beheaded.
Sep 12, 2008 at 6:54 pm rating: +3
#29
secondsout
Next year, Kerry should say that she doesn’t need cash. Then she can get a $100 bill with post-it that says, “fuck you, I got you cash anyway!” PAN, but cash, too.
Sep 12, 2008 at 7:40 pm rating: +4
#30
aeauas
fuck yeah! i love that fucking cake!
http://www.doyax.com
Sep 12, 2008 at 8:04 pm rating: 0
#31
Quite Contrary
Happy Birthday Kerry! We think you deserve lots of cake!
Sep 12, 2008 at 8:08 pm rating: +1
#32
S.S.
Aw, this is such a nice gesture it almost excuses the insult.
Sep 12, 2008 at 9:16 pm rating: +1
#33
Woman on the Verge
Happy Fuck Day to you…
Happy Fuck Day to you…
Happy Fuck Day dear roomie who likes cake that looks like shit and cheez whiz…
Happy Fuck Day to yooooooooooooou!
Sep 12, 2008 at 10:44 pm rating: +2
#34
bellabeastie
thx.
Sep 12, 2008 at 11:31 pm rating: 0
#35
Canthz_B
Got milk?
Sep 13, 2008 at 3:00 am rating: +1
#36
cheapthrills
“you will eat it, and you WILL like it!”
Sep 13, 2008 at 12:19 pm rating: 0
#37
Gledwood
Yum. That does look like a nice cake, hahar!
Sep 13, 2008 at 3:56 pm rating: 0
#38
jackie31337
At the risk of having to wear the unitard, I have to ask: did Kerry eat the cake and was it fucking delicious?
Sep 13, 2008 at 3:57 pm rating: +1
#39
bikerbabeee
Claw, Master of aggressive writing.
Bravo.
Sep 13, 2008 at 7:46 pm rating: 0
#40
Jezebel Gal
Oh that’s awesome. I’m a big believer in celebrating birthdays in some way or another. S0 that’s your’s even if you didn’t want a big cake. Everyone knows now….someone loves you enough to make that awesome cake. Enjoy it. Enjoy it lots.
Sep 14, 2008 at 1:36 am rating: +3
#41
Numinous
Not to criticize or anything (because the concept is awesome), but I would have made the post-it from fondant and written on it directly with food coloring. It would have looked more like an actual post-it and less like a blob of mustard and ketchup.
Can you tell I’m a little anal?
Sep 14, 2008 at 1:48 pm rating: 0
#42
Sabrina
The roommate just wanted some cake….they didn’t care if it was your birthday or not.
Sep 14, 2008 at 1:52 pm rating: +1
#43
aussielurker
I’d appreciate the effort – you have a flatmate that actually cares that you’re a year older, has a sense of humour and likes to make a statement – lucky you.
I think the red stuff is actually some sickly strawberry icecream topping, rather than tomato sauce.
Sep 14, 2008 at 10:31 pm rating: +1
#44
Canthz_B
This is really special.
How often have you been propositioned via cake-gram?!
Sep 14, 2008 at 11:03 pm rating: +2
#45
Canthz_B
Who knew Peter Maxx custom decorated cakes?
Sep 15, 2008 at 12:36 am rating: 0
#46
Drunk Blogger
Hah! This inspires me to write the F-word onto every cake I’ll ever make in the future (I’m thinking this should be especially interesting for baby showers and such).
Sep 15, 2008 at 11:24 pm rating: +2
#47 you know, i’m getting input here that i’m reading as relatively hostile
[...] girl invited every single one of her friends on facebook into a ‘forum’ to plan for her birthday celebrations…six months in [...]
Feb 1, 2009 at 4:36 pm rating: 0
#48
KDE
Actually kind of sweet, in its own way.
Mar 14, 2009 at 7:24 pm rating: 0
#49
tips
I’d just like to thank you for taking the time to create this internet website. It has been extremely helpful
Apr 21, 2009 at 1:32 am rating: 0
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