Lost & found

September 16th, 2008 · 137 comments

Our anonymous submitter in California is not the resident of Apartment 105, but she knew exactly who this note was intended for. “The dude in 105 lets his dog out, deposit her gifts on the sidewalk, and then run back. Dude stands and watches her, perfectly at his ease,” she says. “This has been going on for as long as I’ve lived here, so I guess someone finally got fed up.”

Property of Apt. 105

Adds our submitter: “This is not the first time I’ve seen a note like this. The shameless are immune to passive-aggression.”

related: passive-allergic

FILED UNDER: actions speak louder · California · dogs · neighbors · shit


137 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Pete Nisbet

    that doodoo was fucking delicious

    Sep 16, 2008 at 7:38 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   anglophile bang

      *yawn*

      Sep 16, 2008 at 8:05 am   rating: 37  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Canthz_B bang

      *Too bad, so sad*

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:51 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   To be Me

      No postage necessary!!!!!!!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 12:51 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   Claire bang

      Oh, Pete, the Unitard…time to don the communal unitard…

      Sep 16, 2008 at 2:00 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.5   Pete Nisbet

      what does that mean?

      Sep 18, 2008 at 4:24 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.6   park rose

      It means this

      Sep 18, 2008 at 5:51 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.7   Pete Nisbet

      oh right, cool.

      i’ll be sure to order one then

      Sep 18, 2008 at 12:17 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.8   Helen

      I used to have a next door neighbor at Apt 105 who let her dog crap in my yard and then denied it.

      Feb 11, 2009 at 10:30 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.9   Lizz

      I live on a rural street in CT and we had a neighbor that absolutely hated dogs. He would scream and yell if anyone so much as passed by his driveway while walking a dog. One morning, my mother was leaving for work and discovered a pile of dogcrap at the end of our driveway with a note that said “I dont know who this belongs to, but since we do not own a dog, it must belong to someone that does.”
      Mind you, we dont walk our dog on his end of the street specifically for the reason that, that guy is an asshole. Furthermore, that neighbor happens to be surrounded on all sides by other dog owners. Why he singled out my house, I couldnt tell you.

      Feb 28, 2009 at 2:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Amy

    the shameless are immune to passive aggression

    I want that on a t-shirt.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 7:48 am   rating: 34  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Ti O bang

      That is deep…

      Sep 16, 2008 at 9:20 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   park rose

      Deep shit.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 9:35 am   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Paige

    Dear Apt. 105: Wish you were here! Love, your passive-aggressive neighbour

    Sep 16, 2008 at 7:56 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Claire bang

      “Dear Apt. 105, You owe me one clean envelope. Love ya, XO”

      Sep 16, 2008 at 2:02 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   anglophile bang

    Maybe it would have been more effective to put the property in the envelope and make him open it up to find out what it was he lost.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 8:05 am   rating: 40  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   claw71 bang

      Or bake it into a cake…

      Sep 16, 2008 at 9:03 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Claire bang

      Whatever happened to the flaming sack of dog sh–…

      Sep 16, 2008 at 2:05 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   LS77

      Slap it on his windshield, wait he’s a loser so maybe he doesn’t drive (in California?!).

      I would’ve dropped it in his mailbox!

      Sep 17, 2008 at 1:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.4   Mishee bang

      Everyone drives in CA – I know bums who have cars for Christ’s Sake!

      Sep 17, 2008 at 2:16 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.5   bean

      I woulda smashed into his key hole, and the surrounding area. I mean, if his dog can shit anywhere it pleases, I think that courtesy should be extended to me being able to put it wherever I please.

      Sep 19, 2008 at 4:26 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   HairySwede

    well… shit happens.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 8:17 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   amy d bang

    There’s nothing stinkier than apartment poop.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 8:17 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   claw71 bang

      Have you met RB’s mom?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:23 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   Joe

    Props to the PAN-writer! Some people think they can leave whatever crap they don’t want to deal with anywhere they they please.

    Next target: butt-flinging smokers.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 8:38 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   bedhead

      Not being a smoker, at first I had an image of someone trying to fling their derriere…..eventually I figured out the reference. Time for another cup of morning coffee. The first one obviously didn’t work.

      B

      Sep 16, 2008 at 9:38 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   park rose bang

      Well, just what does a Scotsman wear underneath his kilt?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.3   RunBarbara bang

      mishee’s mom’s mouth.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 3:05 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.4   zyzzyva

      lipstick, if he’s lucky.

      Sep 17, 2008 at 2:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.5   Holiday Djinn

      A bow to keep his package wrapped up tight?

      Sep 17, 2008 at 7:33 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   claw71 bang

    This is neither clever, nor is it effective. Do you think this is going to bother the dude? Nope. The dude abides. If you want to have any chance of getting through, you have to be direct, you have to explain to him why the offending poop shouldn’t be left on the sidewalk. Of course, he’s got more important things on his mind, like making sure that his dog doesn’t crap on his rug. It really ties the room together, you know?

    Sep 16, 2008 at 8:40 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   GhostWriter bang

      In other words, “This will not stand, ya know, this [passive] aggression will not stand, man …

      Sep 16, 2008 at 9:05 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   Mark bang

      This isn’t Nam. There are rules.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:06 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   claw71 bang

      SHUT THE FUCK UP DONNIE!!!!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:11 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.4   RunBarbara bang

      I too dabbled in pacifism once, not in ‘Nam of course…

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:20 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.5   claw71 bang

      What’s this bullshit? I don’t fuckin’ care! It don’t matter to Jesus. But you’re not foolin’ me, man. You might fool the fucks in the league office, but you don’t fool Jesus. This bush league psyche-out stuff. Laughable, man – ha ha! I would have fucked you in the ass Saturday. I fuck you in the ass next Wednesday instead. Wooo! You got a date Wednesday, baby!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:25 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.6   Mark bang

      Pederast.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:28 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.7   RunBarbara bang

      Eight year olds, dude.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:31 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.8   claw71 bang

      Say, friend – you got any more of that good sarsaparilla?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:36 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.9   RunBarbara bang

      Three thousand years of beautiful tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax… you’re God-damned right Im living in the fucking past!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:37 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.10   Mark bang

      NOTHING IS FUCKED!? THE GODDAMN PLANE HAS CRASHED INTO THE MOUNTAIN!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:45 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.11   RunBarbara bang

      Your “revolution” is over, Mr. Lebowski! Condolences! The bums lost! …My advice is, do what your parents did! Get a job, sir! The bums will always lose– do you hear me, Lebowski? THE BUMS WILL ALWAYS LOSE

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:50 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.12   Ti O bang

      Nihilists! Fuck me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it’s an ethos.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 12:29 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.13   RunBarbara bang

      i’ll suck your cock for a thousand dollars…brandt cany watch though, or he has to pay a hundred.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 1:14 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.14   Ti O bang

      In a sense, yes. My art has been commended as being strongly vaginal which bothers some men. The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 1:32 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.15   Mark bang

      Stay away from my special… from my fucking lady friend, man!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 1:38 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.16   RunBarbara bang

      Don’t be fatuous, Jeffrey.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 1:52 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.17   GhostWriter bang

      MIB, DELIVER THE GALAXY OR EARTH WILL BE DESTROYED.

      …wait, what’re we doing here??

      Sep 16, 2008 at 1:58 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.18   Claire bang

      Now if this were in SPAIN, they could have just sweared Apt. 105′s door knob with dog shit…Where are Californian college students when you need them?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 2:07 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.19   Sloper

      You see what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 8:02 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.20   Holiday Djinn

      I wouldn’t hold out too much hope for the Credence.

      Sep 17, 2008 at 7:47 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   Kristin

    To the butt-flinging smokers: The world is not your ashtray.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 8:41 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Canthz_B bang

      I’d rather step on a cigarette butt on the sidewalk than in someone’s old chewing gum!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:21 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   se

      or in dog crap

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.3   Wolverine Girl

      Cantz B, I guess you haven’t stood on a lit ciggy butt in bare feet. It’s a pain I won’t forget. I was 12 or so at the time, at the beach (hence the bare feet) and let me tell you, there was nothing passive in my response that day. I’ve hated butt flingers ever since.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 6:56 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.4   Smokin' Lyn

      I’m a smoker who would like butt flinging smokers to be forced to eat the contents of their ashtray at home. It’s NOT hard to either find a bin, or get a hold of a pocket ashtray.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 9:35 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.5   Canthz_B bang

      I’m not in the habit of going about barefoot.
      The thought of stepping in gum, dog crap or human expectorant disgusts me.
      The very least of my worries is an old cigarette butt or twenty.
      Find a worthy cause to rail against, this ain’t it. If you want to be against litter, I’m with you, but if you find the need to single out cigarette butts from all of the other crap humans deposit upon the Earth, I think you just may need professional help that I cannot offer you.

      Please either spell my name right or don’t single me out by name! ;-)

      Sep 16, 2008 at 9:46 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.6   Canthz_B bang

      If you’re walking around barefoot, does it not behoove you to watch where you put your feet?

      *behoove* ;-)

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:03 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.7   gwennie

      I’ll fling my fucking cigarette butt wherever I fucking like!
      You can hate me now, I don’t care. I’m just a victim of the tobacco industry with an addiction problem.

      Sep 17, 2008 at 5:30 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.8   Bunnee

      Aim for the eyes! Aim for the eyes!

      Sep 18, 2008 at 3:29 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.9   bean

      I’m in the habit of smoking AND walking around barefoot, and I endorse both the common sense responses: smokers, find somewhere to put it; if you walk barefoot, watch where you’re stepping.

      I can understand the beach thing though, people just assume it went out because they threw it in the sand. Shameful. But no reason to single smokers out. I would rather step on a lit cigarette than a piece of glass from some drunken asshole party.

      Sep 19, 2008 at 4:32 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   Mishee bang

    I just wonder how long the note writer stalked the poor dog to collect its poop for his PA note…

    And people say I need to get a life!

    Sep 16, 2008 at 8:58 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   gingerE

      Are you sure the poop was from the dog?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:16 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   amy d bang

      More importantly, did they write the PA note before or after the poop collection?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:40 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   Holiday Djinn

    Am I the only one who finds this PA note crappy?

    Sep 16, 2008 at 9:00 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   amy d bang

      No, I agree, this note really stinks.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:45 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   Claire bang

      This is truly a note that would stick to your shoe…

      Sep 16, 2008 at 2:08 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   GhostWriter bang

    I wanna see this dog. Is he some sorta weird crossbreed with a flounder or manta ray?
    I mean, check out how flat them turds are!

    Sep 16, 2008 at 9:09 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Claire bang

      Perchance the owner of the envelope had stepped onto the previously robust, fresh, and fluffy dog turds…inevitably flattening them and was thus inspired to write…

      Sep 16, 2008 at 2:10 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.2   Ti O bang

      Claire… CLAIRE!
      *holds Claire’s face*
      Calm. Down.
      Pace yourself honey. Say most comments to yourself and only type the really good ones.
      You don’t have to reply to everything in a spastic case of commentary diarrhea.
      seriously.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 2:50 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.3   Mishee bang

      “commentary diarrhea”

      how appropriate on a poo thread.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 3:01 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.4   Canthz_B bang

      78.91? fermentative diarrhea?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 3:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.5   Canthz_B bang

      Rats! 787.91 is the correct code.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 3:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.6   Claire bang

      Point taken, Ti O. Perhaps there are several who could take a bite of that advice…

      *Whoa!, Claire wonders. Should I have said THAT thought to myself?*

      Sep 16, 2008 at 3:45 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.7   RunBarbara bang

      you could be right, claire.
      maybe we just like them more.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 3:58 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.8   amy d bang

      Besides, when you have commentary diarrhea in a chat room, fecal mist get all over everything.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:05 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.9   Mark bang

      Even your TOOTHBRUSH??? Ewwwww!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:10 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.10   amy d bang

      Mark, why do you carry your toothbrush into chatrooms and blog areas anyway?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:11 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.11   GhostWriter bang

      Claire used the word “perchance” so she’s OK in my book!!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:12 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.12   Canthz_B bang

      Then the servers have to clean it and it gets in your food if you don’t tip at least 25%!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:12 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.13   Ti O bang

      I try to keep my chat rooms closed so when one of the cats gets the zoomies they don’t end up in Mishee’s Mom’s pootie-twang posthole!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.14   Mishee bang

      Why does is always end up being about my mama’s pootie-twang posthole?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:43 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.15   Ti O bang

      Because it is funny and I like you. :grin:

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:50 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.16   Claire bang

      Ti O, for someone as easily offended by commentaries on threads as you are, you certainly leave your fair share! :)

      *”DAMN!” Claire thinks silently, taking a swig of cyber Kaopectate for commentary diarrhea of the keyboard and setting the bottle back into the chat room medicine cabinet. “Did I say that in my aloud voice?”*

      Sep 16, 2008 at 5:56 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.17   Canthz_B bang

      I hope we still have the large bottle stocked, I could use a swig every now and again! ;-)

      Sep 16, 2008 at 9:56 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Sheepish bang

    so there is an appropriate use for those envelopes that are sent along with the junk mail.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 9:13 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   bobby

    Can we be sure they belong to the dog?

    Sep 16, 2008 at 9:29 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   thirty six red

    You can’t polish a turd but you can roll it in glitter.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 9:59 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Holiday Djinn

      Or put lipstick on it ;-)

      Sep 17, 2008 at 7:50 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   Canthz_B bang

    They should spread the offending poop on the door of apt. 105 like French cheese.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 10:18 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   claw71 bang

      No, CB, I’d get some latex gloves and squish the turds under the door. I’d smear it on the windows and pack his mailbox full of shit. I’d get his phone number, call him in the wee hours of the morning and fart in his ear. In short, he’d be in a world of shit. That’s how I roll and in my world that is what passes for passive aggressive. When I get aggressive, I’m a mushroom cloud laying mother fucker.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:34 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Canthz_B bang

      Either that’s a really large envelope, or you’re going to have to prepare for your tactic a long time, claw!
      Too bad these folks don’t have a St. Bernard because, as Redd Foxx said, St. Bernards don’t doo doo, St. Bernards shit!! :lol:

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:46 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   secretly Passive Aggresive

      He or she should get primeval on their ass and throw it directly at the dog owner. Why waste a perfectly good envelope?

      Sep 16, 2008 at 11:09 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   Ti O bang

      Oh i would go and get all loaded up on Outback or TGI McFunsters Fried and grilled foodextravaganza. Potatoes? More please. Steak, yes two. Corn? family serving. Apple chocolate Ice cream cake dessert? Of course!
      Then sit an watch the game and wait. Toss back a brick of laxative, wait… then run to his door and in a firehose fetid fecal fountain baptize his front door.
      Like Gabriel blowing a poo horn I will announce my PAN displeasure on him.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:42 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.5   Troy McClure bang

      :D
      “Like Gabriel blowing a poo horn.” To herald Fudgement Day.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 8:20 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.6   booge

      Make sure you know the consequences, Ti O: if you pee on someone’s lawn in public, you can get charged as a sex offender. Or so some inappropriate woman felt the need to tell my friend who was training her for data entry of doctor’s office DOS systems one day. Apparently some neighbor got into an argument and pissed on a lawn to settle it and is now a registered sex offender in California. And since it happened to the neighbor of some stupid hoochie my friend had in her class one day, it has to be true.

      I assume apocalyptic public shits may also lead to charges. Ask RunBarbara or Mishee; I assume one of them has run up against public indecency before and can help you avoid getting the mark of the Beast.

      Sep 17, 2008 at 11:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   eureeka

    All of the dog owners in my apartment complex let their pets poop wherever they please. It drives me crazy, but I have not yet resorted to poop-o-grams. Like the submitter, I hardly think it would make a difference.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 10:41 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Fern

      love the “poop-o-gram” — new word for 2009.

      Sep 18, 2008 at 12:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   bikerbabeee

    Perhaps they should just stroll out into the hallway with the newspaper and a roll of toilet paper while he is watching his dog take a crap, then calmly drop trousers and squat upon the doorstep before him. Nothing passive about that but it really gets the message across fabulously. It’s just a suggestion.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 11:30 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   Ryan

    This reminds me of the one of the refrigerator out on the street…. Why go to that kind of trouble? You don’t like the dog shit being there so you pick it up and bring it inside? Weeeeeird.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 11:31 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Hyla

    I like this suggestion:

    “Maybe it would have been more effective to put the property in the envelope and make him open it up to find out what it was he lost.”

    ~Hyla
    http://earthyfinds.blogspot.com

    Sep 16, 2008 at 11:49 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   nene

    Where are those cheese smearing UCLA students when you need them?

    Sep 16, 2008 at 12:20 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   secondsout bang

    We have evidence that a whole note is unnecessary. The word “Seriously!?!” will suffice.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 12:26 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   secondsout bang

    It almost looks as if the turds are slightly burnt on the outside, and still undercooked on the inside. I can’t imagine what that smells like in the oven.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 12:27 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   secondsout bang

    No return address? No postage? The mailman’s going to be really unhappy with this one.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 12:29 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   Canthz_B bang

      This would stay any postman from his appointed rounds!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 12:50 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   Aramink

    Fabulous.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 1:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   Sheepish bang

    can anyone really own shit?
    once it’s out i figure it belongs to mother nature.
    i’m just doing my part to give back what i took from the environment.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 1:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   GhostWriter bang

      Here’s a riddle:

      Once it’s out, you’ve taken it,
      …and when Apt. 105 leaves it, he doesn’t give it.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 4:16 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.2   Canthz_B bang

      GW, Alex Trebek is smiling this night! :-)

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   snee

    dane cook lives in apt. 105, and it’s already gone to trial.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 1:19 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   aaa

    Why not just dump the turds in his mailbox? Or take a dump in front of his when he’s looking? I mean, if his dog can crap in an inconvenient location, so can you.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 1:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   aaa

      Er, that was supposed to be “in front of his door.”

      Sep 16, 2008 at 1:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #28.2   se

      oh yeah, give him a good show, then he moves the droppings to a piece of paper, writes on it “this belongs to Aggie, #108″, then offers to prove it with the pictures he took of you dropping the load. brilliant move…

      Sep 16, 2008 at 2:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #28.3   bikerbabeee bang

      Gee, why didn’t I think of that…. oh wait.. that’s right, I DID!

      Sep 17, 2008 at 1:30 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   Fresca

    I hope this envelope was left right on his doorstep, so he could step on it and THEN read it…

    Sep 16, 2008 at 1:49 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Stringyhair

    How long did this lay outside door 105 before it was picked up?

    If I was 105, I’d draw a line down making the 5 and eight. Grab the envelope by the tip-tippy corner being careful not to let the poo roll off and drag it down the hall. Then, I’d be appalled when they accused me. Seriously! I don’t even OWN a dog.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 2:01 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   red

    This is totally brilliant! I feel so completely worthless for not having thought of it myself. I WILL be using this later today when my pain in the ass neighbors go out!

    Sep 16, 2008 at 2:25 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #32   Canthz_B bang

    Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds, but we don’t deliver shit without postage!

    Sep 16, 2008 at 3:36 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   0falcon8 bang

    doo-doo-doo-doo
    da-da-da-da
    that’s all i have to say to you…

    Sep 16, 2008 at 4:24 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   Claire bang

    Ahem! Perhaps it would have served the leaver of the note just to chug several beers and throw up on Apt. 105′s welcome mat.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 5:58 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #34.1   Canthz_B bang

      That’s alcohol abuse.

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #35   a cat

    There’s a much better solution.

    Go to the supermarket and get one of those squeezy bottles of peanut butter. Squirt some PB on each dog egg. Next time the douchebag lets his dog wander around and crap unsupervised, it’ll dash over to the PB-coated turd and chow it down like it’s rare steak.

    And hopefully run up to the guy and rub its crap-smeared face on him afterwards.

    Sep 16, 2008 at 6:03 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   Claire bang

    Bravo! Bravo, a cat! Bravo!

    Sep 16, 2008 at 6:08 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   JoelWhy

    Hey, the guy in apt. 105 stole my property!

    Sep 16, 2008 at 8:27 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Lucas

    Return to sender: address unknown, no such number, no such zone.

    WE HAD A QUARREL
    A LOVER’S SPAT

    Sep 16, 2008 at 10:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #38.1   Canthz_B bang

      Her mongrel squatted,
      The cur then shat!

      Sep 16, 2008 at 10:43 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #39   Canthz_B bang

    Guy in apt. 105:

    This is not my shit! I know where all of my shit is and this cannot be my shit! I went through all of my shit, and none of my shit is missing!! I have all of the shit I want (except the shit I’m waiting for UPS to deliver from Amazon) and I do not need this shit!!!

    Sep 16, 2008 at 10:26 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   Miss Unloop

    Now THAT takes “hate mail” to a whole new level!

    Sep 17, 2008 at 12:04 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   Bridget

    Poop is laways funny

    Sep 17, 2008 at 11:33 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Brian

    This is one of my pet peeves (pardon the pun). I often wind up picking up after the shameless so people won’t think I’m the one who didn’t pick up after my dogs.

    On the bright side, when I finally see one of them and snap, odds are I’ll be holding a bag full of shit with which to mount my attack.

    Sep 17, 2008 at 12:29 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Kasey

    These people need to move to Isreal!

    Sep 17, 2008 at 3:52 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   Woman on the Verge

    So that’s what the cake was frosted with!
    http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/09/12/i-dont-need-a-birthday-cake-i-said/

    Sep 18, 2008 at 7:51 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   Cara

    At my old apartment complex, one of my neigbghbors had a gigantic pitbull which they kept chained to the patio 24/7 (which is animal abuse in my opinion, and a dog like that should not be inhabiting a one bedroom apartment with tiny patio anways) and would go crazy and lunge at anyone who would walked by. Even though there was a pet waste station right next to the building, the owner let the dog tage huge steaming craps all over the grass in this one small area and never bothered to pick it up. Those turds were incredibly huge, I’ve never seen anything like it except at the zoo. It was so disgusting.

    Don’t get an animal if you aren’t or don’t have the means to be a responsible pet owner!!!! Pick up their shit please!! It spreads disease.

    Sep 18, 2008 at 5:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #45.1   shepd

      It’s too late, but you can call the police for a noise complaint about dogs like that. Just because it’s a dog making that noise doesn’t make the owners immune. Dogs are, to the law, property, just like a stereo. If your neighbours stereo turns itself on full blast outside at 3 am when you are stumbling home, the neighbours are in for a noise complaint. Same thing for a dog.

      Keep the noisy mutt inside, or face fines. That’s my motto. Of course, my passive aggressiveness includes videotaping people that let their dogs poop all over without cleaning up after them so the irresponsible owners can be fined… :-)

      Sep 23, 2008 at 12:49 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #46   Got that, Fluffy? | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] Excuse me, sir? I think you’ve dropped something. [...]

    Jun 28, 2010 at 8:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   Did you want a doggy bag for those leftovers, sir? | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] Lost & Found TweetShare0mail [...]

    Nov 8, 2010 at 9:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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