our anonymous submitter in california is not the resident of apartment 105, but she knew exactly who this note was intended for. “the dude in 105 lets his dog out, deposit her gifts on the sidewalk, and then run back. dude stands and watches her, perfectly at his ease,” she says. “this has been going on for as long as I’ve lived here, so i guess someone finally got fed up.”
adds our submitter: “this is not the first time I’ve seen a note like this. the shameless are immune to passive aggression.”
related: passive-allergic
135 responses so far ↓
#1
Pete Nisbet
that doodoo was fucking delicious
Sep 16, 2008 at 7:38 am rating: +2
#2
Amy
the shameless are immune to passive aggression
I want that on a t-shirt.
Sep 16, 2008 at 7:48 am rating: +28
#3
Paige
Dear Apt. 105: Wish you were here! Love, your passive-aggressive neighbour
Sep 16, 2008 at 7:56 am rating: +2
#4
anglophile
Maybe it would have been more effective to put the property in the envelope and make him open it up to find out what it was he lost.
Sep 16, 2008 at 8:05 am rating: +33
#5
HairySwede
well… shit happens.
Sep 16, 2008 at 8:17 am rating: +2
#6
amy d
There’s nothing stinkier than apartment poop.
Sep 16, 2008 at 8:17 am rating: +1
#7
Joe
Props to the PAN-writer! Some people think they can leave whatever crap they don’t want to deal with anywhere they they please.
Next target: butt-flinging smokers.
Sep 16, 2008 at 8:38 am rating: +8
#8
claw71
This is neither clever, nor is it effective. Do you think this is going to bother the dude? Nope. The dude abides. If you want to have any chance of getting through, you have to be direct, you have to explain to him why the offending poop shouldn’t be left on the sidewalk. Of course, he’s got more important things on his mind, like making sure that his dog doesn’t crap on his rug. It really ties the room together, you know?
Sep 16, 2008 at 8:40 am rating: +14
#9
Kristin
To the butt-flinging smokers: The world is not your ashtray.
Sep 16, 2008 at 8:41 am rating: +12
#10
Mishee
I just wonder how long the note writer stalked the poor dog to collect its poop for his PA note…
And people say I need to get a life!
Sep 16, 2008 at 8:58 am rating: +2
#11
Holiday Djinn
Am I the only one who finds this PA note crappy?
Sep 16, 2008 at 9:00 am rating: +10
#12
GhostWriter
I wanna see this dog. Is he some sorta weird crossbreed with a flounder or manta ray?
I mean, check out how flat them turds are!
Sep 16, 2008 at 9:09 am rating: +16
#13
Sheepish
so there is an appropriate use for those envelopes that are sent along with the junk mail.
Sep 16, 2008 at 9:13 am rating: +14
#14
bobby
Can we be sure they belong to the dog?
Sep 16, 2008 at 9:29 am rating: +1
#15
thirty six red
You can’t polish a turd but you can roll it in glitter.
Sep 16, 2008 at 9:59 am rating: +21
#16
Canthz_B
They should spread the offending poop on the door of apt. 105 like French cheese.
Sep 16, 2008 at 10:18 am rating: +3
#17
eureeka
All of the dog owners in my apartment complex let their pets poop wherever they please. It drives me crazy, but I have not yet resorted to poop-o-grams. Like the submitter, I hardly think it would make a difference.
Sep 16, 2008 at 10:41 am rating: +6
#18
bikerbabeee
Perhaps they should just stroll out into the hallway with the newspaper and a roll of toilet paper while he is watching his dog take a crap, then calmly drop trousers and squat upon the doorstep before him. Nothing passive about that but it really gets the message across fabulously. It’s just a suggestion.
Sep 16, 2008 at 11:30 am rating: +12
#19
Ryan
This reminds me of the one of the refrigerator out on the street…. Why go to that kind of trouble? You don’t like the dog shit being there so you pick it up and bring it inside? Weeeeeird.
Sep 16, 2008 at 11:31 am rating: +2
#20
Hyla
I like this suggestion:
“Maybe it would have been more effective to put the property in the envelope and make him open it up to find out what it was he lost.”
~Hyla
http://earthyfinds.blogspot.com
Sep 16, 2008 at 11:49 am rating: +1
#21
nene
Where are those cheese smearing UCLA students when you need them?
Sep 16, 2008 at 12:20 pm rating: +2
#22
secondsout
We have evidence that a whole note is unnecessary. The word “Seriously!?!” will suffice.
Sep 16, 2008 at 12:26 pm rating: +9
#23
secondsout
It almost looks as if the turds are slightly burnt on the outside, and still undercooked on the inside. I can’t imagine what that smells like in the oven.
Sep 16, 2008 at 12:27 pm rating: +1
#24
secondsout
No return address? No postage? The mailman’s going to be really unhappy with this one.
Sep 16, 2008 at 12:29 pm rating: +4
#25
Aramink
Fabulous.
Sep 16, 2008 at 1:01 pm rating: 0
#26
Sheepish
can anyone really own shit?
once it’s out i figure it belongs to mother nature.
i’m just doing my part to give back what i took from the environment.
Sep 16, 2008 at 1:16 pm rating: 0
#27
snee
dane cook lives in apt. 105, and it’s already gone to trial.
Sep 16, 2008 at 1:19 pm rating: +4
#28
aaa
Why not just dump the turds in his mailbox? Or take a dump in front of his when he’s looking? I mean, if his dog can crap in an inconvenient location, so can you.
Sep 16, 2008 at 1:22 pm rating: 0
#29
Fresca
I hope this envelope was left right on his doorstep, so he could step on it and THEN read it…
Sep 16, 2008 at 1:49 pm rating: +3
#30
Stringyhair
How long did this lay outside door 105 before it was picked up?
If I was 105, I’d draw a line down making the 5 and eight. Grab the envelope by the tip-tippy corner being careful not to let the poo roll off and drag it down the hall. Then, I’d be appalled when they accused me. Seriously! I don’t even OWN a dog.
Sep 16, 2008 at 2:01 pm rating: +3
#31
red
This is totally brilliant! I feel so completely worthless for not having thought of it myself. I WILL be using this later today when my pain in the ass neighbors go out!
Sep 16, 2008 at 2:25 pm rating: +1
#32
Canthz_B
Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds, but we don’t deliver shit without postage!
Sep 16, 2008 at 3:36 pm rating: +3
#33
0falcon8
doo-doo-doo-doo
da-da-da-da
that’s all i have to say to you…
Sep 16, 2008 at 4:24 pm rating: +7
#34
Claire
Ahem! Perhaps it would have served the leaver of the note just to chug several beers and throw up on Apt. 105’s welcome mat.
Sep 16, 2008 at 5:58 pm rating: +2
#35
a cat
There’s a much better solution.
Go to the supermarket and get one of those squeezy bottles of peanut butter. Squirt some PB on each dog egg. Next time the douchebag lets his dog wander around and crap unsupervised, it’ll dash over to the PB-coated turd and chow it down like it’s rare steak.
And hopefully run up to the guy and rub its crap-smeared face on him afterwards.
Sep 16, 2008 at 6:03 pm rating: +9
#36
Claire
Bravo! Bravo, a cat! Bravo!
Sep 16, 2008 at 6:08 pm rating: +1
#37
JoelWhy
Hey, the guy in apt. 105 stole my property!
Sep 16, 2008 at 8:27 pm rating: +1
#38
Lucas
Return to sender: address unknown, no such number, no such zone.
WE HAD A QUARREL
A LOVER’S SPAT
Sep 16, 2008 at 10:26 pm rating: 0
#39
Canthz_B
Guy in apt. 105:
This is not my shit! I know where all of my shit is and this cannot be my shit! I went through all of my shit, and none of my shit is missing!! I have all of the shit I want (except the shit I’m waiting for UPS to deliver from Amazon) and I do not need this shit!!!
Sep 16, 2008 at 10:26 pm rating: +1
#40
Miss Unloop
Now THAT takes “hate mail” to a whole new level!
Sep 17, 2008 at 12:04 am rating: 0
#41
Bridget
Poop is laways funny
Sep 17, 2008 at 11:33 am rating: 0
#42
Brian
This is one of my pet peeves (pardon the pun). I often wind up picking up after the shameless so people won’t think I’m the one who didn’t pick up after my dogs.
On the bright side, when I finally see one of them and snap, odds are I’ll be holding a bag full of shit with which to mount my attack.
Sep 17, 2008 at 12:29 pm rating: +1
#43
Kasey
These people need to move to Isreal!
Sep 17, 2008 at 3:52 pm rating: 0
#44
Woman on the Verge
So that’s what the cake was frosted with!
http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2008/09/12/i-dont-need-a-birthday-cake-i-said/
Sep 18, 2008 at 7:51 am rating: 0
#45
Cara
At my old apartment complex, one of my neigbghbors had a gigantic pitbull which they kept chained to the patio 24/7 (which is animal abuse in my opinion, and a dog like that should not be inhabiting a one bedroom apartment with tiny patio anways) and would go crazy and lunge at anyone who would walked by. Even though there was a pet waste station right next to the building, the owner let the dog tage huge steaming craps all over the grass in this one small area and never bothered to pick it up. Those turds were incredibly huge, I’ve never seen anything like it except at the zoo. It was so disgusting.
Don’t get an animal if you aren’t or don’t have the means to be a responsible pet owner!!!! Pick up their shit please!! It spreads disease.
Sep 18, 2008 at 5:43 pm rating: 0
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