Entries from October 2008

And a Happy Halloween to you, too

October 31st, 2008 · 92 Comments

Spotted by Lange from Cambridge, Massachusetts while campaigning for Obama in New Hampshire. Says Lange: “We decided against bugging them with our political spiel. (We assumed they were Obama supporters anyway.)”

To whoever stole our pumpkin: Please enjoy it since we cannot. Thank you & Happy Halloween

Meanwhile, corporate belt-tightening isn’t going over so well with the office grunts this Halloween. “This was the response to the environment/holiday committee’s lack of Halloween candy in the office after already ‘decorating’ the office with empty candy containers,” says our submitter in Los Angeles.

:(

In Oakridge, Oregon, however — as our submitter Tyree noticed — they don’t go in much for subtlety.

No Candy go Away

related: Pumpkin with a death wish

Tags: candy · Halloween · holiday spirit · office · party planning committee

The most disgusting thing

October 30th, 2008 · 123 Comments

Says filly in New York: “I think it’s safe the assume the writer is neither a) an English major or b) a feminist.”

The most disgusting thing is a nasty lady!!!! How can you use the bathroom and not clean after yourself!!!! Be hygenical [sic] and consider others!!!! Do yourself and the rest of us a favor. Clean up after yourself, you are not at home!!!!!!!!

related: more from the frontlines of post-post feminism

Tags: bathroom · CAPS LOCK · college life · exclamation-point happy!!!! · hygiene · most popular notes of 2008 · New York · office · spelling and grammar police · that's disgusting · toilet

You were warned never to push Carrie to the limits.

October 29th, 2008 · 193 Comments

Now you must face the evil bitchy consequences.

I am canceling my Halloween party, cause it seems that 60% so far have posted me back with reasons on why they can't come. So I guess instead of having fun, I'm going to be home alone, watching old horror movies, and waiting for little children to come to my door.

related: Pumpkin with a death wish

Tags: cry me a freaking river · Facebook · guilt trip · Halloween · holiday spirit · not-so-veiled threats · TL;DR

And all the pieces matter

October 28th, 2008 · 88 Comments

“If it wasn’t for the handwriting,” says Lauren in California, “I would have guessed my mom wrote it.”

Meanwhile, Carson in Valencia found this note (crudely laminated with packing tape) attached to a tree while walking his dog in the park. “Maybe next time Maggie will think twice about leaving her ceramic cats unattended,” he says.

And in Seattle…

Hey! Those pots were not FREE! give them back!

“In the pot-snatcher’s defense, people leave furniture and the like on the street all over this area of town as acts of charity, so it definitely would have been an easy mistake for anyone to make,” Josef says, adding: “When I took this picture, the homeowner was glaring at me from the garage the whole time. Bad vibes, man.”

related: Neighborhood Crazy-Watch

Tags: apostrophe abuse · California · CAPS LOCK · comma diarrhea · emdash overboard · garbage · neighbors · rhetorical question · Seattle · You call that punctuation? · you know who you are

It’s on my dresser, next to my rolling papers

October 27th, 2008 · 125 Comments

Jeff in Grand Blanc, Michigan says one of his friends found this note on her bed one day when she came home from school. (And no, you can’t go live there.)

Yo — Hemphead! Look what you washed by not checking your pockets! Let's hope the seal was tight enough not to let much water in! May I suggest you lay it out somewhere safe to dry! Love, Mom :) P.S. Where's my clear tape?

related: LAN party at Mom’s house!

Tags: drugs · laundry · Michigan · Moms & Dads · p.s. · signed with love · visual aids

The identity property of flatmates

October 26th, 2008 · 93 Comments

Sarah in New Zealand says all three of these notes went up before 10 a.m. on Monday (trash day). Adds Sarah: “We can only assume that Oliver keeps some kind of detailed diary about everything that happens in our flat, but only refers to it when things haven’t been done.”

the identity property of flatmates

related: 10 people, one kitchen

Tags: garbage · New Zealand · note wars · roommates

Lean Cuisine

October 23rd, 2008 · 83 Comments

From Sasha in New York: evidence that the financial crisis has begun to trickle down to Joe Six-Pack.

I know the DOW just dropped 600 pts. But PLEASE don't eat that are NOT YOURS.

related: Desperate Times

Tags: college life · money · New York · office · stealing · thx

In other words…move it along, Grandma!

October 22nd, 2008 · 62 Comments

Both of these signs would have gotten their points across perfectly well in just a few words…but the true passive-aggressive always knows how to convey his or her true meaning with just one more choice phrase.

Exhibit a) from Paula in Logan, Utah:

PLEASE STOP STEALING OUR ROSES THANKS (SENIORS INCLUDED)

Exhibit b) spotted by my pal Brooke in Savannah, Georgia:

PRIVATE GARDEN Please enjoy the view from the street

related: That means you, Edith

Tags: flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · lOWERCASE l · old folks · pleasantries as afterthought · Savannah · Utah

I am seriously like gonna hyperventilate and die, and it will be your fault

October 21st, 2008 · 162 Comments

Earlier this year, Emma in California was sharing a kitchen with three other girls. one day, out of the blue, one of her roommates posted this note. (Warning: prepare to reexamine any preconceptions you may have about Mormons, straight-edgers, and college-aged women in general.)

untitled 06.17.08 2

By the next morning, Wmma says, the note was promptly defaced, but Pam didn’t respond until about a week or so later, when she announced she was moving out. Apparently, she was saving it all up for her final missive. (Side note to God: While Pam may have a filthy mouth, she did censor herself from taking your name in vain!)

i am seriously like gonna hyperventilate and die, and it will be your fault

related: Losing lisa

extra credit: summer heights high [youtube]

Tags: cleaning · college life · God · mean girls · roommates · saga · sex sex sex · signed with love · thanks (but not really) · you know who you are

The return of Thx Sandra

October 20th, 2008 · 149 Comments

Casey in Human Resources may have moved on, but not to worry — Thx Sandra is here to solve our global climate crysis!

Hello Ladies, This is your friend the thermostat. He likes to be at about 70 degrees in the winter and summer. If you are warm please look behind you and you will see a window. If you open that window fresh air will come in and cool you off. If you are cold you can use a space heater for $3 per week please see Casey in Human Resources if you need to sign up to rent one. Please be aware that our planet is in crysis [sic] and we need to take measures to reduce the trash we throw away and the energy we use (which includes the ceiling fan in Accounting!!!!!) and the recycle bins in the break room. I am sick of being the only conciensios [sic] person here. Thx, Sandra

related: It takes a “genius”

Tags: anthropomorphism · CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · energy usage · exclamation-point happy!!!! · garbage · recycling · San Diego · spelling and grammar police · temperature · The Earth · thx