like so many passive-aggressive notewriters, the author of this note — which sarah in brockton, mass. says was posted in the elevator, front hallway, back hallway and the mailroom of her building after a particularly rowdy friday — just can’t seem to fully commit to sarcasm as a rhetorical technique.
(you know, because otherwise people might not get it!!!)








106 responses so far ↓
#1
Frankie

I’m so picturing a cop drama right now.
” Come in unit 205. Come in unit 205. Over.
Your are a douchebag unit 205. over.”
Oct 9, 2008 at 6:22 pm rating: +9 
#2
Chinchillazilla

I’d be pretty pissed if I were their neighbor, too.
Oct 9, 2008 at 6:24 pm rating: +4 
#3
Krystal Pistol

My scumbag friends are really nice people! I’ll be sure to let them you know you said so.
Oct 9, 2008 at 6:30 pm rating: +2 
#4
kidney bean

Maybe “pigs” is the author? Some kind of wannabe-frathousesque nickname?
Oct 9, 2008 at 6:35 pm rating: +17 
#5
Dina

Dear Neighbors,
Thanks so much for the note! When I decided to have my little get-together, I wasn’t exactly sure whether my friends would mesh well with yours. It’s such a relief to know that you all got on so well. I’ll be sure to invite them back soon!
Cheers,
“The Big” Unit 205
Oct 9, 2008 at 6:56 pm rating: +26 
#6
bean

fuck it. Think of something witty, and I’ll just copy it with precision timing.
Oct 9, 2008 at 6:56 pm rating: +2 
#7
summer

well, at least he’s not bitter.
Oct 9, 2008 at 7:10 pm rating: +3 
#8
park rose

Those not invited to the party in 205 looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.
Oct 9, 2008 at 7:12 pm rating: +57 
#9
Canthz_B

Pigs are under-appreciated animals. This was a well deserved shout-out.
PIGS!!!
Oct 9, 2008 at 7:18 pm rating: +23 
#10
Monique

It’s a friday night for gods sake, let them have the party and get your own LIFE! Sorry, I’m a little bitter, a similar thing happened to me recently. Accept the passive aggressive note was sent to the realtor
Oct 9, 2008 at 7:37 pm rating: +2 
#11
0falcon8

dear passive-aggressive apartment neighbor:
we take much offense at the species slur in your note. we are extremely clean and intelligent animals and do not partake in frat-type activities like drinking beer, as we lack opposable thumbs. furthermore, if you think “oink” is a swear word, then you can go oink yourself, you oinkin’ motheroinker. oink off, you oinkhole.
the pigs
Oct 9, 2008 at 7:43 pm rating: +21 
#12
HS

Dear PIGS!!!,
You’re welcome!!
Unit 205
Oct 9, 2008 at 7:54 pm rating: +2 
#13
Eric B.

What’s the big deal? It’s not like there was cheese smeared on the doors or anything. The note writer is so ungrateful!
Oct 9, 2008 at 7:54 pm rating: +9 
#14
amy d

Those scumbag friends were my neighbors. Perhaps you would know that if you weren’t cooped up in your unit all the time eating bon-bons and talking to your birds.
Oct 9, 2008 at 8:01 pm rating: +9 
#15
secondsout

What about my friends who aren’t scumbags? Can they be as noisy as they like? Awesome!
Oct 9, 2008 at 8:04 pm rating: +7 
#16
secondsout

So was Sarah living in Apt 205 or just sending in the picture?
Oct 9, 2008 at 8:05 pm rating: 0 
#17
Resident Grammarian esq

Hmm, loud raucous party what do I do.?
A) Call the police
B) Call them / Knock on the apartment door
C) Write a badly constructed PAN using no clip art (even though it was typed), and stick it in different places, using an uneconomical amount of blue tape.
Oct 9, 2008 at 8:33 pm rating: +7 
#18
claw71

This note is actually a transcript from a recent condominium association meeting. I was there. It was really sweet, the residents of unit 205 presented one of the association members with an award. They did throw a pretty wild party but it was a lot of fun and we all enjoyed the crazy Scumbag family.
The whole affair was great, we were all having a wonderful time when all of the sudden the doors to the banquet hall crashed open and a dozen hogs came bounding in. It scared the crap out of everybody, especially the speaker. Pigs, indeed.
Oct 9, 2008 at 8:46 pm rating: +14 
#19
Woman on the Verge

Dear People Who Were Not Invited to the Unit 205 Party,
Stop venting your jealous rage by leaving copious amounts of blue tape on the windows. Just because we have rowdy, fun, piggish friends with colorful vocabularies and you don’t is no reason to deface property with garish tape and uninspired notes with boring fonts.
Love,
Unit 205, or as our friends call us, 205 Unit
Oct 9, 2008 at 8:46 pm rating: +3 
#20
strike_a_light

Sound control to 205
Sound control to 205
Send your scumbags home and put your unitard on
Sound control to 205
Commencing PAN, search engines on
Don’t invite those pigs, whatever else you do…
Oct 9, 2008 at 9:26 pm rating: +18 
#21
Quite Contrary

Dear PIGS!
Did you ever stop to think there might be a reason you weren’t invited?
Signed, Thank You Unit 205
Oct 9, 2008 at 9:26 pm rating: +2