The return of Thx Sandra

October 20th, 2008 · 149 comments

Casey in Human Resources may have moved on, but not to worry — Thx Sandra is here to solve our global climate crysis!

Hello Ladies, This is your friend the thermostat. He likes to be at about 70 degrees in the winter and summer. If you are warm please look behind you and you will see a window. If you open that window fresh air will come in and cool you off. If you are cold you can use a space heater for $3 per week please see Casey in Human Resources if you need to sign up to rent one. Please be aware that our planet is in crysis [sic] and we need to take measures to reduce the trash we throw away and the energy we use (which includes the ceiling fan in Accounting!!!!!) and the recycle bins in the break room. I am sick of being the only conciensios [sic] person here. Thx, Sandra

related: It takes a “genius”

FILED UNDER: anthropomorphism · CAPS LOCK · clip art catastrophe · energy usage · exclamation-point happy!!!! · garbage · recycling · San Diego · spelling and grammar police · temperature · The Earth · thx


149 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Gregg

    As if using a space heater saves energy…

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:10 pm   rating: 71  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   hall monitor

      Keeping employees and co-workers comfortable probably doesn’t lead to productivity or increased morale.

      I hope Sandra printed this on recycled paper.

      Hall Monitor
      http://detentionslip.org

      Oct 20, 2008 at 11:16 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   jackie31337

      Or opening a window when the air conditioning is set to 70…

      And this is San Diego. How cold can it possibly get in the winter? Just put on a sweater or something.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 5:20 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   Goldie

      She’s not suggesting using *a* space heater. She is suggesting that everyone in the office get a space heater and then simultaneously turn them all on, with the heater running and the windows open. Poor deranged Thxsandra. I command you, evil spirit of Al Gore, depart from this woman.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 11:40 am   rating: 39  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   D

      Really? Open a window?

      THX SANDRA was obviously raised in a barn, and has no qualms about air conditioning/heating the whole neighborhood and killing the planet. Opening a window while the AC/heater is on is certainly not a way to conserve energy.

      Oct 22, 2008 at 12:39 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   RunBarbara bang

    i never had space heaters to rent, i just had my own that i bought and brought in because my office was cold enough to house penguines.
    sadly, more than once i had to rent it out for the approximate cost of an hour with mishee’s mom a few times a week because of this note.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:13 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Ti O bang

      I was picturing seedy carni folk type with small greasy hands and a van out back busking heaters out of it.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:23 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   smussyolay

      *rent* space heaters? seriously? i would just buy one; it makes more sense. i like that the company is continuing to look for ways to generate more revenue, though.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 10:50 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   zchamu

    “Consciensios”: The science of conning yourself into believing you make any fucking sense whatsoever.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:14 pm   rating: 107  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Mishee bang

      I just wonder if THX SANDRA thinks the squiggly red line under a word just means that it is just underlined… you know, to make a point.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:39 pm   rating: 42  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   Canthz_B bang

      The red lines are there to show that there is a crysis cituashun!

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:04 pm   rating: 42  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   Mishee bang

      I also wonder how many times she has to go back and type again before Word doesn’t autofix the all CAPs anymore.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:11 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   Flaboy2425

      Let’s see if I have this right. Sandra likes to have the thermostat set at 70° winter and summer. I guess spring and fall get the 58° treatment.

      The earth is in “crysis” and she’s “consciensios.” How did she get in a position to post notes or is she the self-appointed note poster?

      If you get hot, open the window? Winter or summer that would cost more than adjusting the thermostat a few degrees.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:37 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.5   Canthz_B bang

      “when sandra (the aunt of the owner) stops by the office once a week to water the plants and drop off supplies, “she leaves these strange notes EVERYWHERE”

      A link is provided…do your homework. :roll:

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:49 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.6   elviruz

      Isn’t that what caps lock is for??

      Oct 20, 2008 at 11:31 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.7   Penny

      “If you get hot, open the window? Winter or summer that would cost more than adjusting the thermostat a few degrees.”

      Not to mention that during the summer, the air can be as fresh as it likes — hot, still air or a warm breeze will do jack for cooling you down.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 3:42 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.8   Arne

      “Ladies” – ??? What kind of place of employment is this? The steno pool? A hair salon? Bordello? A Wellesley dorm? Men don’t get cold? Matter? What??!!

      Oct 21, 2008 at 2:11 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   Frankie bang

    RB do you work with all females or does she just target women only.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:15 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   RunBarbara bang

      it was all women in my department, the only dudes at that company were the drivers that were on work release programs and one of the dispatchers.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Ti O bang

      “work release”

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   RunBarbara bang

      i never have to work for release.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:22 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.4   Ti O bang

      I have never had release at work except for that waitress at TGI McFunsters when I worked there in the 80′s.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:27 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.5   Arne

      Arbeit macht frei

      Oct 21, 2008 at 2:12 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Dina

    This is quite possibly the longest note about not touching the thermostat in the history of the world-I mean come on-what was wrong with a simple “Please don’t touch the thermostat”?!

    Oh, also:

    Dear Sandra,

    Please be consciensios about the environment when you print out these notes. The message could have come across just as effectively without your excessive waste of colored ink-use the black and white printer from now on, and lay off the clip art!

    THX,

    The Ladies.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:17 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   Ti O bang

    I wondered if this is how she talks too?

    Certifiable crazy person!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:19 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Erica

    Interesting… she suggests opening the window when the air is on, which WASTES electricity because it causes the A/C to keep running. Also, space heaters are usually banned in offices because they are fire hazards. Maybe she should research all this…?

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:19 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   amazon

      I always heard that the optimal thermostat temperature was 78 degrees in the summer and 68 in the winter. (source: Google)

      I’m a total baby when it comes to being too hot in the summer, and even I don’t set the thermostat below 75.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 8:26 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   DirtyOldLady bang

      I think keeping up-to-date on fire regulations as they relate to office space-heaters probably falls under Human Resources’ responsibilities. Ask Casey. ;)

      Oct 20, 2008 at 8:49 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   0falcon8 bang

    isn’t Crysis the ancient egyptian god of global warming?

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:21 pm   rating: 48  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   olivia

      I thought that was ManBearPig.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:29 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   Goldie

      They used to kill ManBearPigs on Crysis’s altar, to prevent global warming. One escaped, and we are now reaping the consequences.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 4:15 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   SchrodingersDuck

    I wasn’t aware Sandra was an FPS fan. I doubt having a rig powerful enough to run Crysis is very consciensios though.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:24 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Ti O bang

      Sandra goes by “Nomadwing”.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   Tom

      You beat me to it, but there’s no shame in bein’ beaten by the best.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:31 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   secondsout bang

    I like that it’s lower than 60 on the thermostat. I’m not believing that anyone sets the A/C to be that low; it just sounds like the office is really cold.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:27 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   RunBarbara bang

      it was really cold. i swear, the building was built on a hell mouth. between the fly infestation and the hot/cold spots…not to mention sandra herself, who looked like The Crypt Keeper in a wig.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:31 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   0falcon8 bang

    HELLO SANDRA,

    WE ARE ALSO SICK OF YOU BEING THE ONLY CONSCIENSIOS PERSON HERE. PLEASE HELP COMBAT GLOBAL WARMING AND REFRAIN FROM BLOWING HOT AIR AND RECYCLE YOURSELF TO ANOTHER JOB ELSEWHERE.

    THX,
    THE LADIES

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:29 pm   rating: 59  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   fink

      Recycle yourself out that window behind you.

      Oct 23, 2008 at 1:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   The Mayor of Bethville

    Greenzo, out!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:32 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   secondsout bang

    One quick way to reduce the trash is to stop printing out all these notes that just get tossed after the office makes fun of THX Sandra behind her back. But we don’t have time for rational solutions, now, do we?

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:33 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Jimmy Straightline

      Many people overlook the savings achieved by typing ‘THX’ rather than ‘Thanks.’ But “THX” uses 50% fewer letters – and the use of letters is the leading way to spell Global Warming.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:17 pm   rating: 62  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   Lyn

      I.. I think I.. love you.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:23 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   Dare

    “… crysis and we need to take measures to reduce the amount of trash we throw away…”

    I’ve got $10 that the next note left by SANDRA is one relating to the proper disposal of toilet tissue.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:35 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Dina

    Apparently, Sandra’s definition of “about 70 degrees” is a toasty 59.

    What department does she work in-accounting?

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:36 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Mishee bang

    Accounting is hard work. We need the ceiling fan to stir up the room air while we sit at our computers entering in numbers…

    or commenting on PAN.

    Either way, it gets stale in here!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:38 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   Beth

      Turning off ceiling fans is the next best thing to changing to compact fluorescents, hadn’t you heard?

      Oct 20, 2008 at 10:35 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   amy d bang

    That thermostat is no friend of mine.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:39 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   biscuit

    What did Accounting ever do to deserve a ceiling fan? They’re just cooking the books to get whatever they want.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:43 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   amy d bang

      Cooking the books raises the temperature. Hence, the need for a ceiling fan.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 3:45 pm   rating: 32  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.2   Goldie

      Why did they throw their ceiling fan in the trash, is what I want to know.
      Oh those drunken accountants and their wild antics!

      Oct 21, 2008 at 11:19 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   Mishee bang

    The global climate crysis makes me wanna cry… sis…

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:43 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   amy d bang

    So, in order to combat global warming, we need to reduce:

    1) Trash
    2) Energy Used
    3) Recycle Bins in the Break Room

    Does not compute.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:43 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   agatha christie

      I was wondering if someone else caught that.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 6:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   claw71 bang

    I used to think the thermosat was my friend. We got along really well. We didn’t hang out together but our working relationship was exceptional.

    Then one day I wan’t feeling to well and I went home early. I thought it was odd that my wife was home when I got there. I walked in and heard her in the bedroom moaning. “You’re so hot.”

    I slowly pushed open the door and there she was, sprawled out inthe bed with my “friend” the thermostat.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:48 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   0falcon8 bang

    it looks like sandra ran through the PAN checklist for this one….

    all caps…..CHECK
    anthropomorphize thermostat…..yup
    sarcastic logic regarding windows…..of course
    misspellings…..yas
    rant on tangent issues….yep
    multiple exclaimation points….oh yeah!!!!!!
    run-on sentences….yes and yes and yes and yes
    disownership of everything wrong in the world…..roger that
    clip art…..hells yeah

    bravo, sandra, and thx
    keep on keepin’ on

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:53 pm   rating: 75  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   RunBarbara bang

    I am naming my black metal band Crysis. We are going to tour Norway and burn down some churches, we will write songs like “Fossil Fuel is made of Babies” and “Bastard Ozone”. Our first album will be called “No Thermostat in Hell”.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 3:58 pm   rating: 36  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   Mishee bang

      You make me think of one of my favorite Kevin Smith clips:

      http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=5D-9X3ooFvo

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:04 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.2   Ti O bang

      The best will be the live bootleg of “Hybrid of the Hydra” and “The Carbon Footprint of Cerberus”

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:08 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.3   RunBarbara bang

      which are, of course, the b-sides to “Greenhouse Gas Massacre”, “Osiris, Ice Caps and Blood” and “All Gorey”

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:14 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.4   Ti O bang

      Yes, and you can’t leave out the hit “Acid Rainmaker”.

      Oh Fuck me!!! All Gorey! :lol: :twisted:

      I bow to your superior punnery RB!

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:29 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.5   Beth

      Don’t forget “Ceiling fans are for evildoers”

      Oct 20, 2008 at 10:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.6   aaa

      Oh God, I can’t handle such skillfull punnery! I’m gonna go sit in a corner and shrivel up like a salted snail now…

      Oct 20, 2008 at 10:42 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.7   RunBarbara

      sorry beth, i dont think that my black metal band wants to be confused with christian rock.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 10:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.8   Ti O bang

      Wasn’t one of the b-sides The Pooper (compost version)?

      Oct 21, 2008 at 11:14 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   anglophile bang

    The use of a clip art urging recycling of newspapers on a note about the thermostat can only mean that I am supposed to build a newspaper bonfire in the middle of the room if I am too cold.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:01 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Andy

    Hmmmph. And here I thought my extended bathroom stays were my geo-friendly way of naturally “space heating”.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:02 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   amazon

    HELLO SANDRA,

    IF YOU ARE SICK OF BEING THE ONLY CONSIENSIOS PERSON HERE, PLEASE LOOK BEHIND YOU AND YOU WILL SEE A WINDOW. IF YOU OPEN THAT WINDOW, YOU CAN JUMP OUT IT.

    THX,
    LADIES

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:03 pm   rating: 36  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   wicked opinion

    Um, Sandra? Thx for the suggestion of a space heater.So…. if we are NOT interested in saving energy and thus the world, we can rent possibly the worst machine on the planet in terms of energy conservation. Are there any other alternatives? Oh yes, I can use that $3 to buy resume paper to look for a new job.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:06 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Canthz_B bang

    Americans don’t save enough. We need to reduce the amount of trash we throw away, thereby increasing the amount of crap we save.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:12 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   Numinous bang

      I’ve got lots of crap in my house. Does that mean Sandra would love me? Nah, she’d probably find something else to complain about.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 2:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   Mishee bang

    You know what THX SANDRA is really saying, don’t you?

    She likes it at 69.

    Dirty, dirty bird!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:13 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   HS

    Dear Ladies,
    I don’t know anything about renting space heaters for $3.
    Please tell thx Sandra to stop sending people to me for everything!
    Thanks,
    Casey in Human Resources

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   Canthz_B bang

    Why is the Sun wearing shades? Who the fuck is shining in his eyes?!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:31 pm   rating: 70  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   RunBarbara bang

      George Hamilton?

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:42 pm   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.2   Mishee bang

      Do I have to say it?

      Okay, I will…

      his future’s so bright, he’s gotta wear shades..

      *heads over to the corner for self punishment for bringing up the 80s again*

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:46 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.3   Ti O bang

      Well you know it isn’t because he is cool because well he is the SUN!

      Oct 20, 2008 at 4:49 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.4   Canthz_B bang

      Wear the mullet wig, Mishee.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 5:45 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.5   Bellabeastie

      Is it just me or does it look like the sun is crying?

      Oct 20, 2008 at 5:53 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.6   Mishee bang

      duh bella! of course it’s crying… there is a crysis!! a GLOBAL climate crysis to be exact!

      Oct 20, 2008 at 5:57 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.7   Frankie bang

      Let me taste your tears.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 6:11 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.8   Canthz_B bang

      The Sun is Al Gore? Now that’s an inconvenient truth!

      Oct 20, 2008 at 6:23 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.9   AuntyBron

      Really? Hmmm…I thought it looked a little dim.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:02 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.10   cre8tivewmn

      “He wears his sunglasses at night….”

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   noah

    I’m very concerned about the environment. Therefore, we will use energy inefficient space heaters and open the windows when the AC is on. Awesome.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:45 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #32.1   Bunnee

      Not to mention burning down the entire office from using said inefficient and DANGEROUS space heaters.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 5:54 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #32.2   Canthz_B bang

      Space heaters don’t cause fires. Idiots operating space heaters cause fires. :-P

      Oct 20, 2008 at 5:58 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #32.3   AuntyBron

      We could beocme a radical group! Our mantra will be “Power to the power!”

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:04 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #32.4   Bunnee

      I still have an irrational fear of space heaters, CB, even though we use one in our son’s room in the winter. Wait, my husband is the one who operates it, so…, I guess my fear is justified!

      Oct 21, 2008 at 12:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #33   Singe

    If I’d seen that in person, I would have passive-aggressively corrected all the spelling errors with a sharpie. Maybe even have assigned a grade. :)

    Oct 20, 2008 at 4:51 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   JoelWhy

    Nothing helps to save the environment more than a condescending note written by a self-proclaimed do-gooder.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 5:23 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   secondsout bang

    Don’t you guys know anything? Crysis is a Bob Dylan song. Lyrics:

    It’s a big Crysis on the fifth day of May
    59 Degrees in the office of HR
    So I turned on the heat and the cold went away
    My $3 heater rental wouldn’t get me very far

    Sandra came to the office to water the plants
    A lack of dumb notes on the office walls
    She got on the ‘puter and searched some clip art
    Printed it out and watched the temperature fall

    The ladies in accounting approached the thermostat
    They knew right away Sandra’s mind was kinda scary
    She said, “Are you looking where the heater rental’s at?”
    I said, “I got three dollars.” She said, “it’ll be necessary!”

    At my computer, my hands covered in ice
    She said, “there’s a crysis I’m trying to fix
    If it’s 59 in here, our gas bill’s a low price
    ‘Twas then that we told her to suck all our dicks

    Crysis oh Crysis, you mystical child
    The writer of these notes is clearly insane
    Crysis notes from Sandra and the PANners smiled
    I’m not opening the window in the drizzling rain!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 5:31 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #35.1   Troy McClure bang

      Awesome, 2out. I love this song.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:43 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #36   leftfoot

    I really don’t think 70 degrees in the summer is caring about the environment. (and how would opening a window when it’s 90 degrees outside cool you off anyhow?)

    Oct 20, 2008 at 5:37 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   GhostWriter bang

    Hello, LADIES!

    This is your friend, the rifle! You will take her to bed with you. You will take her to 69 through the Winter and the Summer. If you don’t got the balls for that, you can see Casey in HR to rent some, you slimy twinkle-toed maggots!

    Son, you need to take measures to get your ass and head wired together. I AM SICK OF BEING THE ONLY CONSCIENTIOUS SOLDIER AROUND HERE, PYLE!!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 5:53 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   John McCain

    My friends, that one doesn’t have an energy plan that is going to help America get through these trying times. I do. I know what it’s like to be cold. I know what it’s like to be hot. I spent most of my life in a POW camp.

    But I don’t want to talk about that. I want to tell you about my friend, the thermostat. He doesn’t like to be pushed beyond 70 degrees inthe winter, but Senator Obama there seems to think that he can afford it. I know better because I listen to the thermostat. I also know that he doesn’t like to go much below 70 degrees in the winter, but that guy over there doesn’t know that. He doesn’t care. He thinks thermostats can be adjusted to any temperature at any time. That’s a recipe for failure. Our troops don’t want to fail.

    I’m a maverick. When they first invented thermostats I was 60 years old. I didn’t learn how to use them. When I was a boy we lived in caves and hunted small dinosaurs for food. We didn’t even have fire then so I know how to use blankets when I’m cold and when it’s warm i take off all my clothes and roll in mud. It feels good.

    I see no reason to bother the thermostat, my friends. And if you vote for me in Novemeber I never will and if we win in November I promise that Sarah Palin will conduct every press conference naked, on a polar bear skin rug. Negrobama over there won’t do that, will he?

    Oct 20, 2008 at 6:09 pm   rating: 64  small thumbs up

    • #38.1   Ti O bang

      Sarah Palin = Ice Cave
      just sayin’.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 9:26 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.2   Bunnee

      Pure awesomeness. Except you didn’t say “Maverick” enough….

      Oct 21, 2008 at 2:08 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.3   clumber

      I am SO glad I got that ballot off into the mail last night… I might have been tempted to make some significant changes after reading that POW guy’s speech up there.

      POW! PEW! PEW! mmmmAVERICK!

      Oct 21, 2008 at 2:45 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #39   Vlad the impaler

    Oh thank god THX Sandra is Back.

    What a treat. What about poor Casey in HR? How does he feel about this never-ending stream of space-heater renters outside his cubicle?

    CRYSIS? Fucking *precious*.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 6:19 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #39.1   Canthz_B bang

      “casey in san diego (a.k.a. the beloved runbarbara) says that’s the situation she’s found herself in at her job.”

      I don’t know. How do you think SHE feels?

      Oct 20, 2008 at 6:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.2   RunBarbara bang

      i wish i could say that this was the first time i’ve been confused for a man today….

      Oct 20, 2008 at 7:07 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.3   secondsout bang

      You should stop wearing a codpiece.

      Oct 20, 2008 at 7:18 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.4   RunBarbara bang

      how else will i keep my boner from showing through my skirt?

      Oct 20, 2008 at 7:27 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.5   aaa

      Lucky you, RB. My codpiece makes it look like I’ve got a freaking grapefruit in my pants, yet people still call me ma’am. :c

      Oct 20, 2008 at 9:55 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #40   Canthz_B bang

    It’s not like San Diego is the land of the drastic temperature change really.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 6:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   Ella

    Oh thank goodness!
    Thx Sandra is also consciensios about the earth!
    I thought I was the only one. That would be a cryses.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 6:43 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Anthony

    I understand heat is expensive, but how much does spellcheck cost?

    Oct 20, 2008 at 6:47 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Brittany

    I love that it’s not even currently on 70.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 7:52 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   Jojokittie

    I just LOVE how it is set at 60. HAHAH!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 8:03 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   elviruz

    I love this website!! you guys are hilarious.
    anytime I’m feeling down, PAN brightens my day.

    just like thx sandra’s sunshine :D

    Oct 20, 2008 at 8:30 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   Ash

    Sandra, I feel for you. It’s hard being the only “consciensios” person around.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 9:28 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   SarahBelle

    So, RB. Did you save all the THNX SANDRA notes when you left or are people from the office sending the PAN glory your way?

    Oct 20, 2008 at 9:48 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   aaa

    You know, THX SANDRA is really good at being Al Gore’s bitch. She espouses the magic of being eco-friendly, yet encourages people to open the window when the heat’s on and to use space heaters. Like how Al Gore wants us all to not be killing on the environment, but uses more than many times the energy of the average American and owns a private jet. Ah, hypocrisy. It makes me proud to be an American.

    http://www.snopes.com/politics/business/gorehome.asp

    (Although one could make the argument that THX SANDRA is trying to get other people to be hypocrites while Al Gore is only making himself a hypocrite. Either way.)

    Oct 20, 2008 at 9:53 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   aaa

    Crysis sounds like the name of a crappy heavy metal band.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 9:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #49.1   aaa

      Dammit, RB beat me to it. :/

      Oct 20, 2008 at 10:01 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #50   Canthz_B bang

    You ain’t nothing but a thermostat,
    Hanging on the wall.
    Tears in the ocean to the climate,
    And you ain’t no friend of mine!

    Oct 20, 2008 at 10:13 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #51   harmonicpies bang

    Proof once again that PAN holds the key to reducing wasteful use of energy. And our engineering department thought they were so clever to just mount a fake thermostat on the office wall and laugh as we fought over the controls.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 11:09 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #52   Sydney

    I can’t be the only one who wants to know what ACCOUNTING!!!!!! did to deserve the special Thx Sandra shout-out. I give Accounting 2 days to construct an effigy of Sandra out of discarded styrofoam coffee cups… in an effort to reduce, reuse, and recycle, of course.

    Oct 20, 2008 at 11:48 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   maude

    I know what she means! I’m totally the only consciensios person I know too!!!!!!!!!

    Oct 21, 2008 at 12:03 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #54   Toopillow

    “Crysis” sounds like a disease. This woman is a disease – someone please smack her with a wet noodle.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 12:19 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #55   Grace

    Ironically, Sandra doesn’t realize that other than aluminum, recycling actually causes more pollution and costs more money.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 12:20 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #55.1   aaa

      Yes, just the way Al Gore wants things to be.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 12:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #55.2   Mark bang

      Grace, do you have a cite on that? There are different schools of thought on that, and I’m pretty sure that you couldn’t really say with authority that in all cases recycling causes more pollution and costs more money. It depends on the situation and location.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:00 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #55.3   aaa

      There might be different schools of thought, but Al Gore’s school is the only right school.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #56   The Prof

    That space heater was fucking delicious.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 1:42 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #56.1   Canthz_B bang

      Dipwad’s Law has rung true once again. :-|

      Oct 21, 2008 at 1:52 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #57   Walrus

    Disclaimer: unfunny but necessary.

    Me=sick of management using environmental awareness as an excuse for them being cheap assholes. Hotels and Starbucks making me feel guilty for NOT using towels more than once or NOT taking more than one napkin makes me want to drown polar bears.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 2:05 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #58   Cady

    “Consciensios,” all the goodness of Doritos, but without the guilt.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 2:05 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     
  • #59   Garcy

    Actually, Crysis was an ancient Greek goddess worshipped by premenstrual women. I’ve worshipped at her altar many times. Favorite rituals include the gnashing of teeth, the blaming of boyfriends, and the mass consumption of chocolate.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 10:32 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #60   I'm not anyone

    Thx Sandra is my mom :( (but she really does like 69!)

    Oct 21, 2008 at 11:16 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #61   Goldie

    I read the whole thread, and I still don’t understand how she knows the thermostat is a “he”. I shudder to think what she did with the poor device to find that one out.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 11:41 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #61.1   aaa

      Thermostats are like birds and whales. You can only see their penises when they’re ready to make more birds and whales. So no, you really don’t want to know what THX SANDRA did to that poor thermostat.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 12:00 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #61.2   thirty six red

      Its’ little plastic reproductive organ is clearly visible .

      Oct 21, 2008 at 12:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #62   FurryThomas

    I like the fact that someone apparently fiddled with the thermostat before taking the picture.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 11:53 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #63   thirty six red

    DEAR SANDRA,

    YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY PERSON CONCERNED WITH WASTE AND ENERGY.

    PLEASE CONTACT ME:

    MARVIN @ OBERLIN COLLEGE

    Oct 21, 2008 at 12:18 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #64   WackyWalrus

    Thanks, I’ve been waiting for somebody to put the ‘cry’ in ‘crisis’.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 12:51 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #65   Eric Gaffney

    Greatest Sebadoh reference in a p/a note so far, nice job Thx Sandra.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 2:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #66   tana

    I think there’s more than one crysis Sandra is dealing with.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 3:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #67   Goldie

    Hey guess what, I just ran into Sandra in the hallway. “Rent a space heater from me,” she said. Sandra looked scary, so for my own safety I said, “Sure, how much?”. She looks at me and says: “I need about three-fitty”. And that’s when I saw… it was not Sandra at all. It was that goddam Loch Ness Monster again!

    Oct 21, 2008 at 4:20 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #67.1   Mishee bang

      Loch Ness??? I could’ve sworn it was the Land Shark…

      oh wait… that was the Candy Gram that came to my door.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 6:00 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #68   hamburke

    So I read this to my husband and he got angry. Apparently, they have a space heater problem in the winter (I think his office is warm and I never think offices are warm). A newer space heater will draw 11 W. The breaker will trip at 17 W so add 11 W to the energy needed to power the computer, dual monitor and phone (lights are on a different circuit) and it’s a recipe for tripping the breaker which my husband then has to deal with. They even send out a reminder in the fall (it went out last week) explaining the reason why you can’t use a space heater and presenting the proper channel to get the temperature changed in your space.

    Oct 21, 2008 at 6:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #68.1   Mark bang

      11 watts? What the hell kind of wussy space heater is that? That wouldn’t warm up jack. Maybe 1.1 kW, or maybe 600 W or so. 11W won’t do squat.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 7:04 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #68.2   Wade bang

      An easy bake oven with the door open would put out almost 10 times the wattage.

      Oct 21, 2008 at 7:47 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #69   grumpygranolagirl

    When I am cold, I put on my Mongolian BBQ hat.

    Oct 22, 2008 at 7:57 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #70   Tmarie

    Runbarbara (Casey):

    I’m dying to know… did you tell the owner what this crazy lady had done, when you finally left the company?

    I would have had the dude out to lunch and gone NUTS.

    Oct 22, 2008 at 1:17 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #71   Lindsay

    “Crysis”- see Casey in Human Resources for a spell check

    Oct 23, 2008 at 11:46 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #72   violet

    sandra needs to use spell check before posting any future environmental missives. she is causing a grammar “crysis” by not being “consciensios” enough.

    Nov 5, 2008 at 7:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #73   Mudhooks

    When I was in art college, I took lecture classes in a “room cold enough to house penguins” in winter.

    I was freezing my ass off with my parka, gloves, scarf and toque (wool hat for non-Canadians) while trying to take notes and keep from getting hypothermia and this ass actually opened the window. I got up and closed it. He got up and opened it and said that maybe I “should dress warmer”….

    Since he was one of those students who tended to the 14 sweaters, 11 pairs of wool socks stuffed in rubber boots, and much body hair (women included) form of dress, I pointed out that maybe HE should take off a sweater or two if he was so fucking hot and that if he stopped opening the windows in the middle of winter, maybe the school fees would go down.

    Nov 10, 2008 at 10:00 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #74   THX, SANDRA | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] The return of Thx Sandra! [...]

    Jul 6, 2010 at 11:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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