Entries from November 2008

and i’m singing “uh oh” on a friday night

November 30th, 2008 · 72 Comments

how’d you like to be flatmates with dianne in london? cos i’m thinking there just might be an opening soon…

related: clarifying motion #2

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Tags: bathroom · drizzunk · hygiene · london · roommates · spitting · u.k.

thx for your honesty

November 27th, 2008 · 82 Comments

happy thxgiving, everyone!

related: it takes a “genius” to come up with a potluck theme like this one

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Tags: holiday spirit · office · party planning committee · san francisco

a new tagline for the price is right?

November 25th, 2008 · 275 Comments

our anonymous submitter in new jersey found this note taped to every apartment door in his complex. “we do indeed have a problem with feral cats in our neighborhood, but my sense is that they’ve been around for many (cat) generations…not that people are buying new ones.”

adds our submitter: “now that i think about it, [...]

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Tags: cats · exclamation-point happy! · guests · jersey · neighbors

anyone for “heart and soul”?

November 24th, 2008 · 89 Comments

“there are several common rooms in my dormitory at indiana university, and most of them have pianos available for the students to play,” writes jain in bloomington.
“while I can empathize with this anonymous student’s frustration, possibly after hearing the third or fourth broken attempt at ‘chopsticks’ in a single day, i’ve personally found the exit [...]

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Tags: indiana · music · northern virginia · university · virginia

do that to me one more time…

November 23rd, 2008 · 114 Comments

the most passive-aggressive thing about this note? well, our submitter admits: “i do play soundtracks just to annoy him. maybe next time he shouldn’t dance with other people’s significant others at the office holiday party.”

related: it was an ironic dance party, okay?

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Tags: massachusetts · music · office · p.s. · touching

sincerely, disappointed

November 20th, 2008 · 126 Comments

our anonymous submitter says this display is just one of many microwave missives his coworker has created. “someone tore it down and threw it on the floor once,” he says, “but she put it back up, laminated with heavy-duty tape.”

and of course, the art-imitating-life inspiration for this post:

related: to each his own microwave
extra credit: pam [...]

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · highlighter · microwave · new york · not-so-veiled threats · obnoxious definition · office · spelling and grammar police

so if i start selling drugs i can drive an escalade, too?

November 19th, 2008 · 129 Comments

a little object lesson for the kids in tulsa, oklahoma…

(where’s this line item in the budget for the war on drugs, ya think?)
related: tokyo police club

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Tags: excessive capitalization · oklahoma · the po-po · tulsa

“that’s what she said”

November 18th, 2008 · 195 Comments

spotted by randi in charlotte, north carolina, this one’s straight out of the michael scott playbook.

related: to the victor goes the bile

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Tags: faint praise · north carolina · now that's management · oh no you didn't · spelling and grammar police

why you don’t want to go to b-school, in two words

November 17th, 2008 · 160 Comments

group projects.
#5, however, is what really seals the deal.

(click to enlarge!)
related: please ladies please

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Tags: a little uptight · bullet points · california · e-mail · hygiene

law & order: special dishes unit

November 16th, 2008 · 114 Comments

“these are the results of your typical no-one-washes-their-dishes-at-the-office situation,” says our submitter in portland, oregon.
“there used to be a note above the sink that said “NOT YOUR MAMA,” but it was replaced with these gems, both of which sort of creep me out (and neither of which has ameliorated the dirty dish issue).”

meanwhile, elsewhere in [...]

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Tags: dishes · kinda creepy · office cop · portland

the scarlet status update

November 14th, 2008 · 188 Comments

today’s facebook friday submission comes from an anonymous onlooker in college park, maryland. (read from the bottom up.)

related: i challenge you to an emoticon-off!

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Tags: ex drama · facebook · spelling and grammar police

the silverware segregationist

November 13th, 2008 · 163 Comments

i’d say this whiteboard notice — from a student at northwestern university in evanston, illinois — is neck-and-neck with this for “most unnecessary and inappropriate analogy ever.”

‘plex, by the way, refers to (in the words of our anonymous submitter, the note’s recipient) a northwestern residence hall, foster walker complex, “that’s full of disinterested seniors and [...]

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Tags: a little insensitive · chicago · illinois · roommates · university · whiteboard

an arguably heated dispute

November 11th, 2008 · 363 Comments

technically, mike in boston only has two roommates, but roomie #2’s ever-present girlfriend has become the apartment’s de facto fourth resident…the non-rent-or-utilities-paying kind.
explains mike: “we only have one thermostat for the whole apartment, but our rooms are so tiny that we can typically keep the heat off and the place stays at 68-70 degrees.” once [...]

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Tags: boston · energy usage · oh snap · roommates · smiley · temperature

we didn’t “steal” your muffin — we leveraged it

November 10th, 2008 · 128 Comments

sigh. half the people in your department just got pink-slipped, your 401(k) is worth shit, and now, just when you thought things couldn’t get any worse…they’re coming for your muffin, too.
all in the name of shareholder value!

(leaked by sayf in greenwich, connecticut.)
related: lean cuisine
extra credit: morgan stanley cancels christmas, jobs [dealbreaker]

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Tags: connecticut · greenwich · money · not-so-veiled threats · office fridge · rebuttals · stealing · touching

next on fish with low self-esteem

November 9th, 2008 · 138 Comments

“as a college student used to her freedom, i’m sometimes gone for days at a time when i’m home for the summer,” explains jesse from gurnee, illinois, admitting that during this time, her betta fish, freddie mercury, tends to go unfed.
“my 14-year old-sister has shown him mercy a a few times,” jesse says, and admirably, [...]

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Tags: anthropomorphism · family · guilt trip · illinois

tant pis, mon amie

November 7th, 2008 · 159 Comments

writes our anonymous submitter: “amie and i were friends since junior high. we had plans to go out for my 22nd birthday, but she canceled the day of. i said it was cool and that we should reschedule, and then i never heard from her again…until four years later, when she requested me as a [...]

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Tags: facebook · frenemies · mean girls · xoxo

it’s pat!

November 5th, 2008 · 61 Comments

on a recent roadtrip around southern maine, noelle and her friends hilary and misha spotted this puzzling little note posted in the back of a gas station convenience store.

when they left, noelle says, “the manager ran after us, screaming, ‘what were you girls doing, taking pictures of my store like that?!’” noelle and her friends [...]

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · maine · now that's management · say wha? · spelling and grammar police

a little bit of shameless gloating

November 5th, 2008 · 64 Comments

writes coco: “[about a year ago,] while visiting home (charleston — south carolina’s lone bastion of remote liberalism) — i left my ‘is it 2008 yet?’ sticker-adorned car in san francisco’s outer richmond district for friends to babysit. upon my return, my friend presented me with this note, which had been left on my windshield [...]

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Tags: california · parking · politics · san francisco

this message brought to you by the PAN PAC

November 4th, 2008 · 102 Comments

it’s the question of the day: have you voted yet?
if NO, please consider the following (from campaign field offices in “fake virginia” and philadelphia) before heading to the polls.

if YES —  why not celebrate your participation in the democratic process in the most american way possible: buyin’ stuff!
related: herbie goes to washington

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Tags: bathroom · cleaning · pleasantries as afterthought · politics · smiley · your mother doesn't...

the book of cubicleism, article iv: “the laying on of hands”

November 2nd, 2008 · 142 Comments

anthony in salt lake city, utah was a little perplexed when the new lady sharing his cubicle put this little number up. odder still, he says, “is the fact that this particular wall was originally my half — she took everything i had on that end and moved it to the other side.”
says anthony: “apparently [...]

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Tags: CAPS LOCK · exclamation-point happy! · jesus · office · salt lake city · touching · utah