today’s facebook friday submission comes from an anonymous onlooker in college park, maryland. (read from the bottom up.)
related: i challenge you to an emoticon-off!
the scarlet status update
November 14th, 2008 · 189 comments
FILED UNDER: ex drama · facebook · spelling and grammar police
189 responses so far ↓
#1
Amanda
Does anyone know where my underwear is? Seriously.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:30 pm rating: +88
#2
zchamu
I love the setting of the relationship status *after* the fact just to turn it back off. Passive aggressive gold, Nick. Gold.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:32 pm rating: +93
#3
Deanna
I think it was a passive-aggressive tactic on Amanda’s part so she could get with a guy who can spell.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:34 pm rating: +54
#4
RandyinReno
Amanda! I herd that your underwear is in the glovebox of Nick’s car. You must have left them there accedentally when he gave you a ride home from the laundrymat.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:34 pm rating: +2
#5
Timo
Amanda Blake!?!?!?
Not Miss Kitty. Oh wait …she’s dead.
I hate Facebook Fridays. 
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:36 pm rating: +2
#6
castagnettes
Apparently the exclamation point was too strong.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:36 pm rating: +11
#7
Canthz_B
3 min is a short relationship, Nick. Work on your stamina, Dude.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:38 pm rating: +27
#8
Amandah
i laughed until i cried
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:38 pm rating: +1
#9
Wayne D.
“i herd a guy she goes where is my underwear” Is it a transsexual?
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:39 pm rating: +15
#10
Wade
Note to Amanda:
Take you iPhone out of your back pocket before you do the bump and grind.
That re-dial button is a bitch.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:39 pm rating: +17
#11
unholyghost2003
forget her underwear, where was her PHONE that she could accidentally dial Nick? Perhaps set to vibrate?
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:40 pm rating: +33
#12
Mishee
Facebook Friday reminds me of when RunBarbara makes me get on all fours and make puppy noises.
If I am lucky she will take me out back to piddle.
I’m not usually lucky.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:46 pm rating: +3
#13
Thanks
I herd cows!
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:56 pm rating: +18
#14
amy d
Well, she did say that 2 months was too long. He had fair warning that she was gonna have to get a little to tide her over.
Nov 14, 2008 at 2:57 pm rating: +28
#15
Canthz_B
Dearest Nick,
Two months is too long, but Trevor isn’t!!
I love you,
Amanda
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:02 pm rating: +50
#16
fantasy
……. four years ago I wrote this suicide note and I am still alive….. groan
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:03 pm rating: +7
#17
Tmarie
It’s days like this that I feel old, and at the same time glad Facebook didn’t exist when I was young and totally immature about relationships.
Nick’s little piece of outburst is nothing compared to what I’d have cooked up.
However, mine would probably have been done in English.
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:04 pm rating: +24
#18
fantasy
…..oops, wrong note!
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:04 pm rating: 0
#19
Canthz_B
Nick over-reacted.
Amanda was simply confronting the frat boys who pulled the pantie raid in her dorm.
Campus security is right next to Nick on her speed-dial.
Team don’t dump your pussy unless you have pictures!
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:08 pm rating: +6
#20
HS
That’s one way to break up.
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:09 pm rating: 0
#21
Juliet
One thing I love about Facebook is its potential for passive-aggressiveness.
More, more, more!
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:18 pm rating: +1
#22
JoelWhy
Uhmmmm….4:43 a.m., Nick is listed as in a relationship. 4:46 a.m., Nick is single. These two were dating for 3 minutes?! Sorry, Nick, but that wasn’t a relationship, and she wasn’t cheating on you. That was a hooker, and she was “dating” the next John!
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:22 pm rating: +9
#23
castagnettes
“GUESS WHO CHEATED ON ME”… Does that mean there are other options? Wouldn’t that make you a cheater, too, Nick?
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:22 pm rating: +8
#24
Canthz_B
Can you herd one guy? Don’t you need a whole flock of them, like Jesus had?
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:31 pm rating: +8
#25
Anne Marie
“college, park maryland”?
Nice punctuating there.
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:33 pm rating: 0
#26
maude
My guess is she was banging someone who knows how to use punctuation.
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:35 pm rating: +1
#27
T.U.M.
“GUESS WHO’S CHEATING ON ME AMANDA” makes him sound like a Cockney whose sister is being cuckolded.
“Cor blimey, mates, me Amanda’s ‘usband’s shaggin’ anuvver bird!”
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:43 pm rating: +17
#28
MW
They should totally make up. Sluts and the illiterate belong together.
Nov 14, 2008 at 3:46 pm rating: +9
#29
Frankie
I got a dollar says Amanda did it on purpose. There are no accidents.
Nov 14, 2008 at 4:01 pm rating: +7
#30
claw71
Look at what a little bitch Nick is. His facebook page looks like he had his 12 year-old sister put it together for him. What a twink….I can’t blame Amanda for cheating. In fact, I have more respect for her because she did.
Nov 14, 2008 at 4:07 pm rating: +3
#31
castagnettes
And the code word was, “Where are my underwear? Oh shit.”
This went the wrong place, and now I need to kill myself.
Nov 14, 2008 at 4:08 pm rating: 0
#32
Panty Muncher
Those underwear were fucking delicious!
Nov 14, 2008 at 4:25 pm rating: +4
#33
Canthz_B
Love isn’t supposed to herd.
Nov 14, 2008 at 4:38 pm rating: +8
#34
castagnettes
It’s interesting that Nick would correct the spelling of “accidentally” and not “heard.”
Nov 14, 2008 at 4:42 pm rating: 0
#35
Amanda
Team: Give the poor guy a break!
He heard his girlfriend cheating on him, he can be a whiney little bitch if he wants to. Poor guy
=[
P.S.- I’m not THAT Amanda, we have the name in common…not the promiscuity.
Nov 14, 2008 at 4:46 pm rating: +3
#36
Afcannon
oh come onnnn. everyone acts a little irrationally when they’ve just had their heart broken.
Nov 14, 2008 at 4:50 pm rating: 0
#37
Goldie
I once accidentally called a guy from my cell at midnight.
I was in my car with music blaring at full volume. I had no idea the phone had gone off.
The guy herd Hot Chocolate’s “You Sexy Thing” in its entirety.
Needless to say, our next meeting was interesting. The dude winking at me going, “I got your, ahem, message”, me not having a clue what he meant. He was heartbroken when he realized the call had been an accident, and he was not, in fact, a sexy thing. Not by a long shot.
Moral of my story, maybe it was not Amanda on the phone, but a recording of a popular indie song “Dude, where’s my underwear? Oh shit.” Nick just jumped to conclusions too fast.
Nov 14, 2008 at 5:08 pm rating: +24
#38
unfortunate names blog
I hope amanda gets traclked
Nov 14, 2008 at 7:31 pm rating: 0
#39
Nikki
Hehe. Maybe she was just listening to the interlude in Outkast’s The Love Below. It even starts with a guy’s voice.
Oh my god where are my panties?
He gon’ think I’m a hoe.
Fuck that I liked it
I was drunk and it was my birthday anyway.
Maybe I should just lay here and let him touch my booty.
Probably not, but “Where are my panties” always makes me laugh.
Nov 14, 2008 at 8:25 pm rating: +5
#40
Holly Wood
I desperately want to make a hilarious, ROFLMAO comment and get lots of thumbs up in a bid to bolster my sense of self-worth.
Judging by some of the recent attempts by the so-called ‘I’ve been here since damn nearly the beginning – so na na na!’ crowd, the whole notion of ‘PAN’ is taking on an ugly life of its own in the comments section.
Yeah congratulations. You’ve been here since damn nearly the beginning. Hooray! What a legend!
“You da man!” “No you da man!” “No, no…you da man!” “Nahh, you da man!”
Nov 15, 2008 at 1:42 am rating: +16
#41
matt_at_tafe
*I desperately want to make a hilarious, ROFLMAO comment and get lots of thumbs up in a bid to bolster my sense of self-worth.*
Boo Hoo.. YOU FAIL, ALREADY!!
Nov 15, 2008 at 6:43 am rating: +4
#42
TMA
Hmmm…. that’s proabbly the reason that executive at the mobile phone company invented the ‘lock keypad’ function…
The Masked Avenger
http://insidethemindofaboredteenager.blogspot.com
Nov 15, 2008 at 10:35 am rating: 0
#43
robocadaver
poor amanda… now she got stuck with a stupid guy that suffer a pre-dementia problem.
Nov 15, 2008 at 11:06 am rating: 0
#44
Holly Wood
Claw, oh…so it’s ‘Kerry’ now? Gee, you must have been here ’since damn nearly the beginning’. Hats off to you dear sir, I dare not get in your way.
And how two-dimensional can one get? Much of the amusement of this site first comes from the subject note itself, second is the desperate race in the comments section from the lemmings trying so hard to attain membership in some fictional ‘club’, via a ‘genuinely’ high-brow attempt at humor. For the real readers of the site, the screams for validation in the comments section is where much of the real PA action is.
And Frankie, don’t give up! You’ve been here since damn nearly the beginning after all. One day you’ll get that embroidered PA badge attesting to your longetivity at passiveaggressivenotes.com! Ask Momsey politely and she’ll sew it on to the shoulder of your tunic.
But quite Frankly, besides my attempt at being a true asshole in this post, this site does deliver some serious humour in the original content it posts regularly (i.e. the original PA notes themselves). To those clinging on by riding on the coat-tails of the real humor by fishing for validation in the comments section; lighten up -many of you are becoming the very thing you strive to critique.
Nov 16, 2008 at 1:00 am rating: +9
#45
Canthz_B
/
Nov 16, 2008 at 1:41 am rating: 0
#46
matt
yes pls enlighten me, is this gigglebrax thing a PA invention or americanic word, never heard of it.. sigh-i’m just a naive ozzy..
*crashes back onto ground and rolls over* zzzz
Nov 16, 2008 at 2:42 am rating: 0
#47
park rose
Ooh, you were only playing dead.
Anyway, gigglebrax, ur doin it right.
(see the irony in me doing it wrong? 
That was intentional, btw *coughs*).
Let me see, this site likes Aussie, but it’s slang, you know, so it duzznreally matter.
This site might help you with your italics.
Nov 16, 2008 at 6:13 am rating: 0
#48
matt
WOTV: Is this a cyber breathalyser test?.. what? blow where, oh ok * ha…fffffffffff. Hey! Get those handcuffs off me now, put me back!! Oh, Hi Nick, whats all that blood on your shirt? Amanda’s? oh ok.. yeh she was a bit of a bitch i guess*
Nov 16, 2008 at 4:08 pm rating: 0
#49
sadgirl
*thinking how much fun this comment section used to be….*
You fucking jackasses are ruining it.
Nov 16, 2008 at 6:15 pm rating: 0
#50
Passmind
49 comments, too many comments for this, WOW! Facebook! HOW EXCITING! not.
Nov 20, 2008 at 2:13 pm rating: 0
#51
Blogette
Apparently it’s just a little exciting.
Nov 27, 2008 at 7:20 am rating: 0
#52
5Dman
I remember when i first join FB, i added a friend(guy) and was prompted on how we met, so me being the mischievous fellow that i am, i click on we dated and still friends. Now, at the time it sounded like a good idea. but DAYAM, was i f’kin wrong. The next thing i know i was like getting weird msgs in my inbox from gay guys.
owh, i think i should delete FB..it’s destroying lives.
Mar 4, 2009 at 8:09 pm rating: 0
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