“that’s what she said”

November 18th, 2008 · 199 comments

spotted by randi in charlotte, north carolina, this one’s straight out of the michael scott playbook.

related: to the victor goes the bile

This post is favorited by 1 user

FILED UNDER: faint praise · north carolina · now that's management · oh no you didn't · spelling and grammar police

199 responses so far ↓

#1 Kerri

I may be a bad spelling witch, but I try…

Nov 18, 2008 at 9:58 pm rating: +9

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#2 Geoff Girardin

This… this is the greatest receipt I have ever seen.

Nov 18, 2008 at 9:59 pm rating: +62

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#3 shane

Man, if I had a nickel for every time someone said that about me, I’d have…. hang on.. carry the 2… gah, I need to go lay down.

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:02 pm rating: +49

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#4 Erika

Their “special” employee of the month?
Perhaps they are running a monthly work program.

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:16 pm rating: +1

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- #4.1 agirlie
  
  That’s what I am thinking, still quite a back handed compliment. In my wildest dreams someone got ahold of the managers key and re-programmed the receipt print out as a joke on a friend, which is funny to me and not sad…
  
  Nov 18, 2008 at 10:23 pm rating: +23
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#5 georgia girl

fyi – the term ’special’ in educational lexicon refers to students with special needs, often with intellectual disabilities. Without a doubt, Janet is employed by the restaurant in a program to promote self-sufficiency. THAT SAID, the so called ‘normal’ employee who can’t spell ‘tries’ needs to be called out by the spelling police.

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:18 pm rating: +37

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- #5.1 fantasy
  
  My sister Janet, went to art school, in a short yellow limo.
  
  It took me about a week to figure it out, that art school meant ’special’ in educational lexicon refering to students with special needs, often with intellectual disabilities.
  
  *Human speak, special ed.*
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:52 am rating: +7
- #5.2 Amandah
  
  this doesn’t bode well for me, i go to art school
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 8:48 am rating: +24
- #5.3 claw71
  
  I thought that the misspelling clearly identifies Janet as the one tooting her own horn.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:34 am rating: +11
- #5.4 secondsout
  
  My school, like most schools, featured the occasional attempt to integrate the special ed kids with the regular kids. Most usually in PE class. Not that that worked all that well. The non-tards would usually get annoyed by the tards on the team. “Stick him way in the back of the outfield and call him the ‘rover’ or something. You don’t need him at first base.”
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:16 pm rating: +4
- #5.5 Canthz_B
  
  Yeah, they made great Dodgeball targets too!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:01 pm rating: +6
- #5.6 secondsout
  
  Or tennis targets.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:06 pm rating: +3
- #5.7 Ti O
  
  That one day a year where you had to go to the gym and do line dance or square dance in my day with a girls class. somehow the girls class always had the one “special” girl she would have the sweatiest hands. They always stuck me with her and….
  WAIT a minute I was the “special” boy in my class!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:27 pm rating: +17
- #5.8 Canthz_B
  
  So much becomes clear to you now, eh Ti?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:48 pm rating: +3
- #5.9 agatha christie
  
  I work with ’special’ kids and once, while plastered, said, “I can call them retarded because I work with them!” Everyone except me was horrified. I know I’m going to Hell, why not get there in a handbasket?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 6:51 pm rating: +5
- #5.10 agirlie
  
  Tards? seriously? NT stands for neurotypical which most of my kids are, two are NOT neurotypical, one had ASD (translated-autism) and rode the “short bus” in early childhood. Not fond of the word retard and esp not “tard”, I know there is more class here than those statements represent.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:05 pm rating: +28
- #5.11 fantasy
  
  *but, my sister did go to “art school” that is what my parents said. *
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 8:35 am rating: +1
- #5.12 JoeInLA
  
  “…I know there is more class here than those statements represent.”
  
  Nope. Check out some of the toilet threads if you don’t believe me. Lots of wit though, if that helps to soften the blow.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 5:20 pm rating: +3
- #5.13 Canthz_B
  
  agirlie, you’ve been on PAN a very long time.
  What ever gave you the idea there was much class to be found here?
  That’s just retarded!
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 6:09 pm rating: +8
- #5.14 tropicalmist
  
  agirlie, retard means slow, so if they are slow in any way then technically they are retarded.
  
  Dec 2, 2008 at 10:25 pm rating: 0
- #5.15 tropicalmist
  
  agirlie, retard means slow, so if they are slow in any way then technically they are retarded.
  
  I think ’special’ sounds more offensive than ‘retarded’… it’s called mental retardation, so why shouldn’t they be called retarded? OH honey, you’re just SPECIAL. That’s like saying that Santa Clause IS fucking real.
  
  Dec 2, 2008 at 10:27 pm rating: +3
- #5.16 tropicalmist
  
  sorry, my browser fucked up and I didn’t see that I posted the first time, so I posted again and added some shit… lol… no I’m not retarded.
  
  Dec 2, 2008 at 10:33 pm rating: 0
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#6 fantasy

She may be slow???

Well of course she is, she was born with trys a disease that makes your life HELL!

Sorry, your HotChoc LG is cold.

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:24 pm rating: +8

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#7 Sirius

She’s Tryon her best

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:37 pm rating: +11

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- #7.1 fantasy
  
  “Tryon her best down on North Tryon Street”!
  
  Sounds like a country western song!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:18 am rating: +3
- #7.2 Canthz_B
  
  That misspelling manager’s assignment to the Tryon Street store reminds me of Capt. Wilton Parmenter being assigned to command “F-Troop”.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:50 am rating: +3
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#8 Mishee

Attention Dunkin Donuts Customers:

We are sorry we are closing our doors after years of loyal service. Janet may be slow, but apparently her father and his high powered attorneys are quite quick to slap us with a lawsuit.

We thank you for your continued patronage.
Management

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:38 pm rating: +84

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#9 WolfDog

Please don’t tell me that person used a credit card for 2 bucks! Who doesn’t have a couple of dollars laying around, check behind the couch.

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:41 pm rating: +13

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- #9.1 se
  
  There’s this newfangled thing people are using, called a debit card.
  
  Nov 18, 2008 at 10:47 pm rating: +42
- #9.2 fantasy
  
  One Hot Chocolate, $2.15.
  
  Making Janet feel special “Priceless!”
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:35 am rating: +20
- #9.3 Woman on the Verge
  
  It’s those damn Visa commercials. Nobody wants to be the one who screws up the complicated choreography of the fast food business by actually using cash… It’s already slowed down by that damn Janet, cash would simply cause a complete breakdown of the donut business.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 7:43 am rating: +35
- #9.4 Timo
  
  For Godssakes, keep a grip on it, Janet.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 8:45 am rating: +2
- #9.5 Goldie
  
  You got me, WolfDog, it happened to me yesterday. I used my credit card for a $3 transaction. It was 10PM, I was completely out of cash, and I forgot to bring my couch with me. This will never happen again, as I have now chopped the couch in pieces and put it in my trunk.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:26 am rating: +80
- #9.6 claw71
  
  Fuck you, WolfDog. I always use plastic. American Express, baby, everytime. Don’t leave home without it. I don’t care if I’m buying a box of doughnut holes for$2.50 or a case of White Castles for $8.99. When I make a purchase I want people to know who they’re dealing with.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:41 am rating: +23
- #9.7 Ti O
  
  When I am buying zip ties, duct tape and plastic drop cloths or even just a bottle of chainsaw oil I hand over the plastic. It gives me a chance to feel the texture of the young cashier girl’s skin.
  
  aahhhhhhh.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:34 pm rating: +20
- #9.8 MW
  
  Has no one heard of a Visa DEBIT CARD?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 2:17 pm rating: +1
- #9.9 Goldie
  
  So, Ti_O, what do you hand over if the cashier is a guy?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 2:17 pm rating: +2
- #9.10 Numinous
  
  I know you want us to think you buy that stuff for abducting and murdering young women, but I’m pretty sure that’s just your regular supplies for weeknight porn watching.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 2:19 pm rating: +12
- #9.11 Timo
  
  Don’t be silly the chainsaw oil really is for the saw.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 2:39 pm rating: +2
- #9.12 Numinous
  
  Is that what you call it? I heard of boys giving nicknames to their penises before, but that’s an awfully strange one.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:05 pm rating: +2
- #9.13 Brian
  
  9.8 “Has no one heard of a Visa DEBIT CARD?”
  
  Well for one, se who posted comment 9.1 has.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:44 pm rating: +2
- #9.14 cucumber
  
  If it was really for the saw I think you’d call it “bar and chain oil” like the rest of us who actually USE chainsaws do.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 2:52 pm rating: 0
- #9.15 maggie
  
  Spoken like a true chain saw murderer.
  Somebody has to talk for EVERYONE right cucumber.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 3:17 pm rating: +1
- #9.16 P.Bunyan
  
  It pays to know the tool.
  
  I say good man be a chap and hand me the bar and chain oil. Now don’t be a ruffian and refer to it in a general way as chain oil or saw oil. Why that would be right slap dash!
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 4:06 pm rating: +2
- #9.17 Canthz_B
  
  “…know the tool.”
  
  *snicker
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 5:12 pm rating: +3
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#10 0falcon8

as a reward for getting employee of the month, does janet receive a prys?

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:42 pm rating: +54

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- #10.1 Sue Do Nim
  
  Unless she does, she crys.
  
  Nov 18, 2008 at 10:45 pm rating: +28
- #10.2 Holiday Djinn
  
  If it is a Dunkin Donuts shirt, i hope it is the right sys.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 7:37 am rating: +26
- #10.3 GhostWriter
  
  We won’t find out until Randi replys.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:47 am rating: +19
- #10.4 Bunnee
  
  You can never believe Randi, she lys.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 10:51 am rating: +18
- #10.5 Canthz_B
  
  I’d love a response, but it would be a surprys.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:51 am rating: +16
- #10.6 Bunnee
  
  You won’t believe it until you see it with your own eys.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:29 pm rating: +10
- #10.7 Krystal Pistol
  
  If the shirt’s too big, she can always set the heat on hy while it drys.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 6:08 pm rating: +3
- #10.8 Leona
  
  Good lord, this whole chain made me laugh so hard I nearly wet my pants.
  
  Thanks for the high quality lulz.
  You’d better stop now before somebody sprays their keyboard and their computer dys.
  
  Nov 28, 2008 at 4:59 pm rating: +1
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#11 John in IL

Wouldn’t you be kinda stupid (slow) to say “hello” after you got your receipt. The deed is done. Sadly, receipts mean goodbye.

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:45 pm rating: +30

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- #11.1 fantasy
  
  At the drive up window no less! Very hard to back up after the fact.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:26 am rating: +8
- #11.2 AuntyBron
  
  No, just park your car, run inside and accost the poor girl on her special day.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:08 am rating: +11
- #11.3 Ti O
  
  What?
  Is her Aunt Flo visiting?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:36 pm rating: +3
- #11.4 star
  
  you mean receipts mean goodby?
  
  Dec 2, 2008 at 10:36 pm rating: 0
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#12 0falcon8

i think all the rumors about janet being “special” and “slow” are lyes

Nov 18, 2008 at 10:50 pm rating: +23

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- #12.1 Canthz_B
  
  Janet wanted her brother Lenny to work there too, but he’s in a production of “Of Myce and Men”.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:46 am rating: +13
- #12.2 Andy
  
  Um, the word is ‘lys’. Learn to spell, special ed.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:14 am rating: +11
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#13 Mishee

The manager made Janet special employee of the month after she tested negative on her EPT.

Nov 18, 2008 at 11:12 pm rating: +10

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- #13.1 amazon
  
  That was the first test I ever failed, and was thrilled about it!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:44 pm rating: +1
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#14 we should call

Dunkin Donuts 5605 N Tryon St, Charlotte, NC 28213 704-494-0733

thanks google

Nov 18, 2008 at 11:25 pm rating: +27

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- #14.1 Timo
  
  ask for Janet.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 8:47 am rating: +15
- #14.2 Holiday Djinn
  
  Unless you are in a hurry. . . . . .
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:48 pm rating: +14
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#15 smussyolay

i don’t care how ’slow’ she is, if you can’t spell ‘tries,’ the receipt is a total FAIL.

Nov 18, 2008 at 11:47 pm rating: +4

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#16 fantasy

Janet is my sister, she just thinks she is special.

Everyday when short yellow bus arrived Mom would holler up the stairs “Limo is here Princess!”

The rest of us all had to walk to school.

Nov 18, 2008 at 11:50 pm rating: +9

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#17 maude

Hurry the &@#$ up, Janet. I don’t care how special you are.

Nov 18, 2008 at 11:50 pm rating: +20

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#18 eric

i think she is blonde

Nov 19, 2008 at 12:07 am rating: +4

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#19 fantasy

This just happened yesterday, so looks like

Janet is whats on special in November!

*if you want a piece of Janet*

Nov 19, 2008 at 12:09 am rating: +5

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#20 fantasy

….. it’s time to make the donut’s!

Janet, you can count the holes, put them in packages of one.

Nov 19, 2008 at 12:21 am rating: +5

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- #20.1 nobody special
  
  …time to make the donut’s what?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:31 am rating: +20
- #20.2 fantasy
  
  Yes,donuts, that is what they make at Dunkin’ Donuts!
  
  Did you notice the reciept at the top of the page?
  
  Have you even been tryon?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:40 am rating: +2
- #20.3 fantasy
  
  Sorry nobody, I just now noticed that you were
  
  special….. huh?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:43 am rating: +2
- #20.4 Spiffy
  
  Just a heads up, Nobody Special was referring to the fact that you added an unneeded apostrophe in the word ‘donuts’
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:48 am rating: +15
- #20.5 Canthz_B
  
  Period.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:00 am rating: +15
- #20.6 Goldie
  
  “Time to make the donut’s day”, a DD employee said to himself as he headed for the bathroom with a fresh, warm donut. “C’mon, donut, you know you wanna. Ahhhh, that feels good. You like it, dont’cha, you donut bitch?! Ahhh yes, yes!!”
  Yet another reason for me to avoid Dunkin Donuts.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:05 am rating: +8
- #20.7 matt
  
  *hmmm.. my custard donut’s a bit runny this morning…*
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:17 am rating: +4
- #20.8 Mishee
  
  Was it delivered by a guy named Van Wilder?
  
  *shudder*
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:19 am rating: +5
- #20.9 Canthz_B
  
  Who needs American Pie when a warm éclair is a perfect fit?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:56 am rating: +5
- #20.10 Ti O
  
  “Hey look creme filled long johns on manager special today!”
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:39 pm rating: +3
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#21 NCrecorg

This Dunkin’ Donuts is only about 5 minutes from my house. I’m definitely swinging by tomorrow morning to get a donut and meet Janet.

Nov 19, 2008 at 12:45 am rating: +37

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- #21.1 Timo
  
  Come back and tells us about it!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 8:49 am rating: +5
- #21.2 Goldie
  
  Holy cow! Go for it!!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:31 am rating: +1
- #21.3 secondsout
  
  See if your receipt comes out the same way!
  
  It might not be nice to tell Janet that the PANiverse is making fun of her and her extra chromosome.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:23 pm rating: +7
- #21.4 Timo
  
  Hey! Leave her chromosome out of it!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:24 pm rating: +1
- #21.5 Canthz_B
  
  Let’s get into her genes!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:37 pm rating: +3
- #21.6 Canthz_B
  
  ♫ Momma don’t take my chromosome awaaaay! ♫
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:40 pm rating: +10
- #21.7 Timo
  
  Ahhh those dulcet tones of Simon (Shapiro) and Garfunkel!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:44 pm rating: +1
- #21.8 fantasy
  
  Hey Timo,
  
  I was thinking about Simon and Garfunkel too!
  
  Feeling Special!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 8:47 pm rating: 0
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#22 Canthz_B

What’s up in Charlotte, NC?
Randi?
Christi?
Trys?

They have their wyres crossed!

Nov 19, 2008 at 12:50 am rating: +8

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#23 Crash

Janet say’s

“Oh thank you, that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever done for me ! ….Wait a minute….is that how you really spell tries ??”

Nov 19, 2008 at 1:01 am rating: +7

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#24 fantasy

……no gigglebrax or edit?

I hate that when that happens.

Nov 19, 2008 at 1:02 am rating: +1

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#25 Ashley

I think this is a ploy for extra tips. Sorry Janet, I don’t care how special you are, you’re not getting my spare change.

Nov 19, 2008 at 1:23 am rating: +2

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- #25.1 jackie31337
  
  Who tips at dunkin donuts? At the drive-thru, no less?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 10:01 am rating: 0
- #25.2 secondsout
  
  Oh God, Jackie, ixnay on the ipstay. You don’t want to repost the Cranky Server thread. Don’t do it. Just back away.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:11 pm rating: +5
- #25.3 Juliet
  
  Just back away slowly… everything will be all right…
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:47 pm rating: +1
- #25.4 amazon
  
  But I’m fairly certain there is more meaningful conversation to be had on that subject.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:48 pm rating: +1
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#26 Canthz_B

“She may be slow” sure beats what they wrote for the last “special” employee…

“She’s a retard, bless her heart!”

Nov 19, 2008 at 1:34 am rating: +53

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#27 Canthz_B

8% sales tax?
Time to buy some Swiss Miss and a thermos.

Nov 19, 2008 at 1:41 am rating: +10

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- #27.1 Mishee
  
  CB – 8.25% here in the South Bay.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 10:10 am rating: +2
- #27.2 Canthz_B
  
  To be fair, I haven’t even checked the sales tax in AZ.
  I just checked. It varies by city. Back in NJ we had a State sales tax, 7% I think. 3.5% in Urban Enterprise Zones.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:03 pm rating: +1
- #27.3 The Commish
  
  8.25 in Los Angeles as well, and our illustrious lame-duck Governator is proposing hiking it up to about 10 percent, even though he rode into office on this wave of decreasing taxes. Sigh…..
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:29 pm rating: +2
- #27.4 nestchick
  
  No sayls tax here in Oregon!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 2:07 pm rating: +4
- #27.5 Goldie
  
  Daymn! I need to move to Oregon.
  7.75% here.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 2:20 pm rating: +1
- #27.6 MW
  
  I’ve got you all beat. 8.75% butt fucking here in TN.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 2:20 pm rating: 0
- #27.7 KMax
  
  Yeah, but no state income tax in Tenn., right? Shows they get you no matter what.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 3:28 pm rating: 0
- #27.8 secondsout
  
  8.75% butt fucking? That’s quite a precise number.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:00 pm rating: +3
- #27.9 Jahzzie
  
  CB, NJ may be 7%, but no tax on clothing or food. And we get tax holidays around the start of school.
  Best thing about NJ, Deleware has no tax at all and it’s a short drive from where I live in central NJ, WOO HOO TAX FREE SHOPPING!!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:47 pm rating: +2
- #27.10 Canthz_B
  
  What 8.75% of Tennesseans do in private is their own business.
  
  I know Jahzzie, I lived in NJ for 47 years.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:54 pm rating: +4
- #27.11 resa
  
  10.25% in Chicago
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 11:03 am rating: 0
- #27.12 smussyolay
  
  yeah … i was thinking the same thing, resa. and it’s 11.25% downtown.
  
  YIPES!
  
  but how i love my fair city.
  
  Nov 25, 2008 at 1:55 pm rating: 0
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#28 Crash

Maybe it isn’t Janet that’s slow, maybe it’s the register instead.
Misspelling shit try’n ta’ make people look retarded…

Nov 19, 2008 at 2:05 am rating: +2

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#29 matt

W…T…F…!
LOL – Why will I not be surprised to hear these guys have been shut down? Legally, a tax receipt is a legal document, so there will be no getting out of this one.

Nov 19, 2008 at 2:41 am rating: +1

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#30 Jim

Who the hell uses their Visa to pay for a $2.15 purchase? Just ask a homeless man for some change. Jeez.

Nov 19, 2008 at 3:01 am rating: +2

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- #30.1 matt
  
  probably a germiphobe. Most people generally know where there cards have been, but binny change – now thats been through some pretty dirty hands I’d say. You’d probably want to start with a thick hankey to wipe off the thick layer of HIV+ phlem, some hospital grade dissinfectant to kill the scabies which you can’t see on the coins and/or a portable (glove box edition) autoclaver just to make sure.
  
  That’s what I’d be using anyway.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:05 am rating: +3
- #30.2 kmd
  
  Is dissinfectant some kind of mutant carrier of lame insults from 1985? Or maybe a special strain of dormant auto immune disorder that attacks the grammar, punctuation and capitalization centers and brings out neanderthals whenever someone writes the word “homeless?”
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 7:27 am rating: +5
- #30.3 matt
  
  yep. it’s generally known as stereotyping/satire. you’ll get over it soon enough
  Good to know though that your crusading the cause of the homeless – and keeping my grammar and spelling in check
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 7:57 am rating: +8
- #30.4 Woman on the Verge
  
  Just to continue to assist, it’s “you’re”, not “your”, matt. At least I think that’s your meaning. No need to thank me… I just love to help.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 8:07 am rating: +5
- #30.5 matt
  
  thanks-woman-on-the-verge.-it-is-just-that-you-start-talking-like-this-if-you-do-not-use-abbreviations-and-then-you-start-to-sound-like-janet-when-she-takes-your-drive-through-order.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 8:16 am rating: +4
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#31 matt

just FYI – theres a staff pic of these guys at

http://www.snagajob.com/job-seeker/jobs/job-details.aspx?postingId=509572&fsr=true

Janet’s gotta be one of ‘em, I just can’t zoom in close enough to read their IDs

Nov 19, 2008 at 5:09 am rating: +5

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- #31.1 Woman on the Verge
  
  Janet didn’t make the pic. She was too slow.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 7:48 am rating: +21
- #31.2 Goldie
  
  Sooo, I see a group of girls and only one cute guy on this picture. Mystery solved. Ten dollars says Janet stole Cute Guy from Bitchy Receipt Author.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:34 am rating: +7
- #31.3 Alex
  
  I am 100000% sure this is a current staff photo of that exact store, and not a corporate stock photo.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:58 am rating: +10
- #31.4 matt
  
  It annoys me that the red/orange combinations aren’t symmetrical in the photo – at least they could do me a favor and get that right; and the (?man/?woman) on the right is the only one with a visible belt. RRRh *where are my OCD meds?*
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 10:20 am rating: +4
- #31.5 GhostWriter
  
  It looks the two on the ends are doing all the work- check out their pit stains.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 2:18 pm rating: +4
add to this thread
#32 rumblefish

In Janet’s defense it is order number 806,357. Wouldn’t you be “slow” after being that busy?

Nov 19, 2008 at 6:35 am rating: +3

reply to this comment
- #32.1 matt
  
  No excuses, cashier’s name was Christi B not Janet’s – so what IS janet up to there? I’m guessing Janet slaved her way from the slummery of drive thru opertator to be in charge of the receipts – She’s just giving herself the credit she thinks she deserves because no-one else ‘validated’ her
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 6:44 am rating: +2
- #32.2 matt
  
  hey..
  That almost sounds like the beginnings of a Dr Phil show.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 6:50 am rating: +1
- #32.3 octavius
  
  The cashier is I.B. Christ ( Iesvs Barrabvs ), so he really is someone special.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 3:07 pm rating: +1
- #32.4 Krystal Pistol
  
  Great, here I am aspiring to be a drive thru opertator, and I find out it’s a less prestigious position than charge officer of receipts?! Thanks for nothing, Matt.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 6:22 pm rating: 0
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#33 Dare

How effing slow can you be? I want one cup coffee, one donut. As they say, it’s not rocket science.

Nov 19, 2008 at 8:36 am rating: +1

reply to this comment
- #33.1 matt
  
  exactly how ’slow’ his slow here. Do they time the orders like McDs do. A good coffee (I mean a proper esspresso one) ~ 1 minute + donute 5 seconds
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 8:45 am rating: 0
- #33.2 jackie31337
  
  What dunkin donuts have all of you been going to? Is there some alternate universe where you can get a proper espresso at a dunkin donuts where they expect you to tip them?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 10:05 am rating: +3
add to this thread
#34 Joe

HtChoc LG? Dunkin Donuts is selling cell phones now? Man, I can’t wait to get it! I want to see how much better the HotChocolate is than the normal Chocolate!

Nov 19, 2008 at 8:57 am rating: +11

reply to this comment
- #34.1 matt
  
  must be one of those pay-nothing-get-nothing dodgy deals. According to critic reviews the HtChoc LG doesn’t quite match up to the iphone for reception
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 9:05 am rating: +1
- #34.2 Goldie
  
  It’s just like the regular Chocolate, except it overheats a lot, and the only ringtone available is “You Sexy Thing”. Then again, what do you expect for $1.99.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 10:21 am rating: +9
- #34.3 Timo
  
  HtChoc to “You Sexy Thing” ringtone? I would give you at least a 20. Love it.
  
  Now I got that stuck in my head.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:35 pm rating: +1
- #34.4 Goldie
  
  Ahhhh… *blushes* no man has ever given me 20 before!
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:38 pm rating: +2
- #34.5 Timo
  
  Hush! You’re special enough you are twice a ten.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:41 pm rating: +3
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#35 What Liz Said

I wonder if she’s a “special” employee or just special.

Nov 19, 2008 at 9:24 am rating: +1

reply to this comment
#36 claw71

“Special” employees. Janet is “slow”. I get it, and I’m all for helping the mentally and physically challenged secure mainstream employment. To a degree. I draw the line, however, when mongoloids manage to find work in the food service industry. The last thing I want is Janet’s chubby, slobber-soaked fingers touching my cruller or I-Am-Sam’s big green booger plopping into my double espresso.

Yeah, I know that there’s always a possibility that I’ll be subjecting to the malicious placement of bodily discharge by sum disgruntled hipster. I try to discourage that by tipping generously and being really nice to the staff. But being nice to “special” employees is counterproductive. They get so giddy over approval that they lose track of what they’re doing and basic concepts such as hand-washing and swallowing excess saliva every so often slips their minds.

So bully for Janet, but never mind on that order. I’ll go up the road to Tim Horton’s where the retards are only allowed to take out the trash and scrub the toilets.

Nov 19, 2008 at 9:32 am rating: +17

reply to this comment
- #36.1 GhostWriter
  
  Research studies* have shown that mentally handicapped workers are 13% more sanitary when performing food-related tasks than ordinary North Carolinyans.
  
  * Studies conducted on the set of “Life Goes On”.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 10:02 am rating: +12
- #36.2 secondsout
  
  I’ve linked to this article from The Onion but it bears repeating, as it applies here.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:09 pm rating: +7
- #36.3 Ti O
  
  When her brave story was finally told Janet was played by Juliette Lewis.
  
  She was typecast.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 1:50 pm rating: +3
- #36.4 Jahzzie
  
  *crys* I want to trys the wonderfulness that is this “Tim Horton’s” everyone talks about.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 4:53 pm rating: +2
- #36.5 kristen
  
  Karma’s SO going to give you a downie baby… just to bring you off that high horse.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 7:22 pm rating: +2
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#37 Andy

Christi, you ignorant slut…

Nov 19, 2008 at 9:33 am rating: +1

reply to this comment
#38 Dani

Dammit, Janet!

Nov 19, 2008 at 9:36 am rating: +6

reply to this comment
#39 you suck at craigslist

Now I’ll have “Special” by Garbage running through my head all day. And/or “Brass in Pocket” by the Pretenders.

Nov 19, 2008 at 9:56 am rating: +2

reply to this comment
- #39.1 Timo
  
  Mmmmm Chrissy Hynde.
  
  nom nom nom
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:08 am rating: +2
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#40 Mishee

has anyone else noticed that Janet has a LONG ASS ALL HELL LAST NAME?

Nov 19, 2008 at 10:31 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
- #40.1 North Carolin-yan
  
  She’s obviously polish.
  
  Janet Geaschiapkikowsi
  
  I’m just taking a guess here but there’s bound to be a lot of vowels.
  
  She’s moved up in the world! Last year she got the special employee award while working at the beer counter at the Nascar races. No one there cared if she drooled in their beers.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:26 am rating: +1
- #40.2 matt
  
  Yes, I remember now, she caught rabies from her lap poodle – they used her to add extra head to the beers
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:32 am rating: 0
- #40.3 Mishee
  
  Well if she is Polish then the slowness is explained right there.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:24 pm rating: +4
- #40.4 Bunnee
  
  Well, if she’s that “special”, there’s no way in hell she would be able to spell her own last name.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:35 pm rating: +2
add to this thread
#41 matt

I’m thinking it’s probably a European name something like Getthefrackamoveon

Nov 19, 2008 at 10:58 am rating: +8

reply to this comment
- #41.1 Mishee
  
  matt – do I have to hit you over the nose with a rolled up newspaper?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:17 am rating: +3
- #41.2 matt
  
  that might just cure my insomnia – give it a try will you?
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 11:20 am rating: +1
- #41.3 Mishee
  
  matt if I didn’t know any better I would think you liked that.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:25 pm rating: +2
add to this thread
#42 MW

The retard here is clearly the one who misspelled “tries.”

Nov 19, 2008 at 11:30 am rating: +2

reply to this comment
- #42.1 Canthz_B
  
  When your employer calls itself “Dunkin’ Donuts”, they pretty much signal that spelling ability is not a prerequisite for employment.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 12:21 pm rating: +14
add to this thread
#43 Canthz_B

To: Dunkin’ Donuts Corporate Office.
Re: Management Training Program.

Ur doin’ it rong.

Nov 19, 2008 at 12:17 pm rating: +22

reply to this comment
#44 orangetiki

wow. hang that one on the wall.

Nov 19, 2008 at 12:53 pm rating: +1

reply to this comment
#45 GhostWriter

They didn’t spell “Dunking” right either.

Nov 19, 2008 at 2:22 pm rating: +1

reply to this comment
- #45.1 GhostWriter
  
  Whoops- CB wins by 2 hours.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 3:18 pm rating: +3
add to this thread
#46 thirty six red

Yes by all means I’ll pull into the drive-in and order an extra large, extra hot hot chocolate say a quick Hi to slow Janet and FIRE IN THE HOLE her good.

Nov 19, 2008 at 3:18 pm rating: 0

reply to this comment
#47 astra

I am so glad I go to Krispy Kreme….

Nov 19, 2008 at 5:12 pm rating: 0

reply to this comment
- #47.1 Timo
  
  I miss my sweet angelic Krispy Kreme.
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 6:07 pm rating: +1
- #47.2 Mishee
  
  *reads words “krispy kreme”*
  
  *gets cavity*
  
  Nov 19, 2008 at 6:08 pm rating: +4
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#48 Timo

“Here at Dunder Mifflin we do everything we can to make the Tards feel a part of our little office family.”

Nov 19, 2008 at 6:25 pm rating: +2

reply to this comment
#49 Noireen

I think Janet has a Polish last name or something. Poor thing, in her younger days all she did was go to camp, and now they put her on show like that. She’s not slow, she just needs her concentration!

Nov 19, 2008 at 7:23 pm rating: +2

reply to this comment
#50 aaa

Is there such a thing as a not special Dunkin’ Donuts employee?

Nov 19, 2008 at 7:28 pm rating: +2

reply to this comment
#51 Ellie

Haha, I used to live in Charlotte and I’ve been there. What’s the excuse for the rest of the employees I’ve encountered, then?

Nov 19, 2008 at 7:36 pm rating: +1

reply to this comment
#52 Tom

If she wasn’t tarded before, how can she be retarded now? Will someone answer me that, for Chrissakes.

Nov 20, 2008 at 8:03 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
- #52.1 unholyghost2003
  
  she breathed too many doughnut fumes?
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 8:18 am rating: 0
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#53 Tripp

If every country had stores that served both Dunkin’ Donuts and Baskin-Robbins ice cream, our problems overseas would be quickly over.

Nov 20, 2008 at 10:54 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
- #53.1 mark
  
  Amen Tripp, Caramel Eclair Sundaes can solve the economic disparity faced by the Mentally challenged of this great country. We can also count on the combined might of Baskin Robbins and Dunkin Donuts to solve the Mid East problem. Who in their right mind could blow up people eating Hot Fudge Apple Fritter Banana Splits. Now if we could figure a way to add Fried pies to this sugar laden solution, The whole world could sing in one part harmony.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 2:25 pm rating: 0
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#54 janet

Note to all: My name is Janet and I was the recipient of a joke gone bad. My nephew placed this message at the bottom of my shop receipt without my knowledge. It was solely intended for me and not meant to insult any individual whether or not they may have challenges of any type. I apologize for his behavior and lack of thinking. As of right now, the receipt footer has been reverted to it’s original message. Lord knows we all have our own challenges, and right now, my nephew is mine. Again, I apologize to all who were offended by the message, and emphasize that it was not meant to cause harm or pain to any individuals at all. Thank you, Janet / North Tryon Dunkin Donuts & Baskin Robbins

Nov 20, 2008 at 5:17 pm rating: +6

reply to this comment
- #54.1 JoeInLA
  
  Janet, I think your apology is incomplete unless accompanied by an offer of a free apple cruller to one and all.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 5:34 pm rating: +2
- #54.2 Mishee
  
  Janet – how did you find us?
  
  Are you Polish?
  
  also, what is the message at the bottom of the receipt now?
  
  secondly, why the hell was your nephew able to change the receipt message? is he the manager of this Dunkin’ Donuts??
  
  thirdly, why the hell did you get your nephew a job where you work?
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 5:35 pm rating: +2
- #54.3 Canthz_B
  
  How old is he?
  Why does he have access to the store’s systems?
  Why didn’t you have him write the apology?
  Is it because he can’t spell?
  If a tree falls in the forest, can I have a LG Hot Chocolate?
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 5:53 pm rating: +2
- #54.4 Krystal Pistol
  
  This can all be worked out, Janet. Just see Casey in HR.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 6:34 pm rating: +1
- #54.5 anglophile
  
  Thanks for clearing up that he did it without your knowledge.
  
  ‘Cause it wouldn’t be a very good joke if he told you about it first.
  
  And also, could you tell us how many people did say hello to you, and what percentage of them spoke clearly and used small words?
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 6:50 pm rating: +2
- #54.6 janet
  
  First off, until today, I was not aware of the change on my receipt, and unfortunately no one said hello to me or maybe it would have tipped me off. My nephew can not write the apology as he will not be alive to do so when I find him. Yes, as a family member he does have access to my computer. He lives to prank me, but got carried away this time. Sorry we do not make apple crullers Joe, but if and when we do, you will be the first one to get a free one. The original message simply stated that if you have any questions, concerns, or compliments please call me at ***, and that is what has been returned. No, I do not believe I am Polish, I am simply put an American Mutt. So then again, I could be… One of our regular customers was nice enough to give me this web address so that I could clear up the situation. So hopefully, this answers all of your questions, and now maybe we can move on to a more interesting topic. Janet
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 7:30 pm rating: +1
- #54.7 anglophile
  
  Thanks for taking the time to answer our questions, Janet. We’re not laughing at you, we’re laughing with you.
  
  You might want to look into a spelling tutor for your nephew, though.
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 7:57 pm rating: 0
- #54.8 Canthz_B
  
  For Heaven’s sake, don’t kill him!
  Write him a letter detailing all of the ways you think he could be better and post it on PAN!!
  
  We’ll take him to task!
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 8:50 pm rating: +1
add to this thread
#55 janet

Okay, I won’t kill him. Would love to put him on PAN……… (I’m smiling now) But my sister would then kill me after she did him in. But I have copied all the messages making fun of his spelling etc. and forwarded them on to the little sh**. Real ego buster guys, thanks. Janet

Nov 20, 2008 at 9:21 pm rating: +3

reply to this comment
- #55.1 Mishee
  
  Janet, you ruined the receipt for me.
  
  Thanks ALOT!
  
  Maybe he was right, and you ARE slow!! Dammit!
  
  Nov 20, 2008 at 10:40 pm rating: +1
add to this thread
#56 Beelzebubba

Baby Jesus crys because of these rhimes

Nov 21, 2008 at 11:52 pm rating: +1

reply to this comment
#57 caleb

here is the location’s phone number that was blacked out: (704) 494-0733.
give ‘em a call and whatever. go nuts.

Nov 24, 2008 at 6:04 pm rating: 0

reply to this comment
#58 Alice

That is sweet… I think they probably didn’t have to point out that their employee was slow, it was probably obvious to the customer.

Nov 30, 2008 at 11:30 pm rating: 0

reply to this comment
#59 love is all around, no need to waste it

[...] didn’t think janet’s dunkin donuts’ employee-of-the-month notice could be easily topped, but then this little ray of sunshine beamed in and made an otherwise [...]

Dec 1, 2008 at 4:14 pm rating: 0

reply to this comment
#60 when a card just won’t do

[...] and then there’s my personal favorite (again, straight out of the michael scott playbook): [...]

Feb 22, 2009 at 2:01 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
#61 Pumaman

This is why you should punch your sister in the stomach if she gets pregnant!

Feb 27, 2009 at 9:41 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
#62 Dale ( but to you its NINJA )

lol lol lol lol lol….. i feel sorry for that person/

Apr 8, 2009 at 9:34 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
#63 recession incentive plan

[...] related: “that’s what she said” [...]

Jul 9, 2009 at 11:01 am rating: 0

reply to this comment

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painfully polite and hilariously hostile writings from shared spaces the world over

“that’s what she said”

November 18th, 2008 · 199 comments

199 responses so far ↓

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