Nate’s sister Heather found this note (written on a bus schedule) outside their house in Los Angeles. “I’d like to think Dan took a bus to surprise Roberto, only to be given the cold shoulder,” Nate says, but we can only speculate about the nature of Dan’s attitude towards the future of this relationship. (Zen? Desperate? Really, really flexible?)
Adds Nate: “I particularly appreciate how he gives Roberto the option to improvise.”
related: Tant pis, mon amie
83 responses so far ↓
#1
anon
“this photo is currently unavailable”
Jan 6, 2009 at 10:35 am rating: 1
#2
Mishee
*tsk tsk tsk*
kerry, kerry…
oh well, I still love you.
Jan 6, 2009 at 10:38 am rating: 1
#3
SchrodingersDuck
At last we learn the true answer to the rhetorical question “What are friends for?”: leaning out of the window shouting “Go Away”. I have more friends than I thought, apparently.
Jan 6, 2009 at 10:41 am rating: 52
#4
You Suck at Craigslist
Why do I have the feeling that Roberto doesn’t keep friends for very long?
Jan 6, 2009 at 10:42 am rating: 3
#5
Goldie
Alright, show of hands. Who else thinks Roberto wasn’t home?
Jan 6, 2009 at 10:51 am rating: 49
#6
unholyghost2003
except this note was left on Nate and Heather’s door. Unless Nate and Heather live with Roberto a possibly long lasting friendship was ruined because Dan got the address wrong.
Dan,
I did not let you in or come to the window to tell you to “go away” or something similar because I don’t live there.
Thank you,
Roberto
Jan 6, 2009 at 10:55 am rating: 26
#7
se
Anybody else wondering how this note was attached?
Jan 6, 2009 at 10:57 am rating: 4
#8
Mishee
Dan,
Just stand outside and yell “Roberto” over and over.
Maybe you will get lucky… Maybe Lopez will come out.
Jan 6, 2009 at 10:59 am rating: 5
#9
claw71
When it comes to friendship Dan sets his expectations low. Even so, Roberto opted not to meet them.
Jan 6, 2009 at 11:12 am rating: 13
#10
Canthz_B
Dan would seem less desperate if he didn’t write with an eyebrow pencil.
Jan 6, 2009 at 11:29 am rating: 21
#11
claw71
I’d like to dedicate Outside by Staind to our boy Dan:
And you
never gave me extra keys
All this time
you wouldn’t even tell me “leave”
yeah
And I cry
because I feel insecure
yeah
and I leave
a note that might seem alme
I’m on the outide
you are my friend
I want to talk to you
I see through your curtain
’cause inside you ignore me, why do this to me?
I only want to see you
just talk to you
All this time
I thought you’d yell outide
“go away”
And I taste
my pride as it goes down
cause of you
ALL THIS TIME!
I WAS OUTSIDE!
MY INTENTION!
TO SAY HI!!!!
And I waste, more time than anyone…
I’m on the outide
you are my friend
I want to talk to you
I see through your curtain
’cause inside you ignore me, why do this to me?
I only want to see you
just talk to you
Jan 6, 2009 at 11:29 am rating: 10
#12
Canthz_B
Dan may not have spotted Ashton Kutcher, but he was Punk’d nonetheless.
Jan 6, 2009 at 11:43 am rating: 4
#13
mamason
Dan wants to make sure he’s not a victim of a generalized and/or random brushing off. He wants the respect given to him by his other friends who will at least look out the window and make eye contact as they shout, “Go away! ”
Poor Dan.
Jan 6, 2009 at 12:13 pm rating: 9
#14
JamieSays
I like to think that Roberto was inside, TV or other form of entertainment clearly audible, and that he also made several passes by the window or door JUST to let Dan know he was there, but that he was not invited in. “A good friend would at least say ‘Go Away’”. Nay, a good friend expects you to pick up on subtle hints, Dan.
Jan 6, 2009 at 12:26 pm rating: 12
#15
TheOldSchool
I want to know what Nate’s sister was doing outside of Roberto’s house?
And why is Nate so obsessed with Dan and Roberto’s relationship? (He seems desperate to find clues about Dan’s personality.)
Maybe someone should warn Dan and Roberto that they are being watched by stalkers.
Jan 6, 2009 at 12:34 pm rating: 4
#16
Flaboy2425
Dan’s unremitting love robs him of his sleep. How much longer can he bear up under the pressure?
Say something, Roberto. Say anything. Your silence only proves that you don’t deserve a caring individual like Dan as a friend.
Jan 6, 2009 at 12:52 pm rating: 5
#17
TheOldSchool
Nate, stop using your sister as your “beard.”
If you want to go out with Dan, be a man and take out a personal ad on Craigslist.
Jan 6, 2009 at 12:53 pm rating: 10
#18
aaa
Now Dan, are these people really your friends if they’re constantly telling you to go away? Or has Roberto just been sucked into your pattern of attaching yourself to people without their consent (or perhaps even their knowledge)?
Jan 6, 2009 at 12:58 pm rating: 8
#19
TheOldSchool
Oh rats! Look at the time!
Can someone with a high res screen please tell me what times the next two “#4″s (westbound) hit South Broadway?
Roberto gets all sulky whenever I’m late for our “sessions.”
Jan 6, 2009 at 1:04 pm rating: 4
#20
aaa
I bet Dan would be the type to come on to PAN and have a public meltdown à la WHITEBLIZZARD70 if he found out his note was up here.
Jan 6, 2009 at 1:04 pm rating: 4
#21
hibousoir
This note is AWESOME! It reads like weird, bad euro-Beat poetry. Somebody get Dan a beret and some bongos, stat!
Jan 6, 2009 at 1:50 pm rating: 9
#22
Mishee
I’m thinking Dan would’ve had more luck standing outside Roberto’s window with a boombox blaring “In Your Eyes”
(hey, if kerry can reference cheesy 80′s movies, then dammit, so can I!)
Jan 6, 2009 at 2:01 pm rating: 17
#23
se
Isn’t it interesting that Nate thinks about this relationship and the term “really, really flexible” comes to mind?
Jan 6, 2009 at 2:14 pm rating: 1
#24
GhostWriter
Introducing…
Daniel!
…the stray cat who would write reproaching notes.
Jan 6, 2009 at 2:41 pm rating: 3
#25
Juliet
Why didn’t Dan just go away? The fact that Roberto was allegedly ignoring him seems to me like pretty clear communication. When you go to someone else’s house and they don’t answer the door, piss off and go somewhere else. This is the type of note that belongs in a Facebook status update.
Jan 6, 2009 at 3:10 pm rating: 4
#26
GhostWriter
Doesn’t the whole thing sorta remind you of Styx’s Kilroy Was Here album?
Don’t be apprehensive, Mr. Roberto- by the front door each day
Don’t be apprehensive, Mr. Roberto, Daniel won’t go away
Why won’t you let me in? (jeepers creepers, or something similar)
I flash my silly grin (jeepers creepers, or something similar)
My heart is in my hand (jeepers creepers, or something similar)
I am your old friend Dan!
I’ve gotta see you; I’ve been hiding under your porch
It’s hardly humorous-, my back is burning, feels like a blowtorch
So if you see me at the window, don’t be surprised,
I’m just a man with strange assumptions, now let me inside.
No- don’t go and hide, just leave me some pride,
Some one’s behind those curtains inside …
You naughty Robert! Behind the curtains. Of course I can see
I’ve come to stalk you, What’s your problem? My weekend is free…
I’m not a weirdo, Don’t want to share ya with others you know,
My lusty manhood’s so substantial, it’s beyond my control
Beyond my control, We all need control
I need control, We all need control
I am your old friend Dan (jeepers creepers, or something similar)
Broadcasting notes on PAN (jeepers creepers, or something similar)
I think it’s plain you’ll see (jeepers creepers, or something similar)
We’re truly meant to be!
Don’t be apprehensive, Mr. Roberto
Oh no, oh no,
Don’t be apprehensive, Mr. Roberto,
Oh no, oh no,
Don’t be apprehensive, Mr. Roberto
Don’t be apprehensive, Mr. Roberto
Don’t be apprehensive, Mr. Roberto
Don’t be apprehensive, Mr. Roberto
…
..
.
Jan 6, 2009 at 4:01 pm rating: 6
#27
bellabeastie
How – why do I think these guys are Puerto Rican?
“Chheez Heriberto open dedamdoor! Choo could bee nice an alease rook outda window an if choo don wanna me come inside trodownashoo or somting. whaadafuck. Whakindafren arechoo? I took da fuckin bus, here man. Whaaswrong witchoo? P.S. Don tell Nate but I fucked his seester .. hehe gracias– Dan”
Jan 7, 2009 at 9:48 am rating: 4
#28
Kryssy
I saw this posted on http://www.found.com as well.
Jan 9, 2009 at 10:03 pm rating: 0
#29
Tiny Buddha
Umm..Does this happen to Dan a lot? His friends frequently look out the window and say go away? This can’t be Robertos problem in the least. Isn’t a passive aggressive faux pas to use a bus schedule for anything other than wiping a bums ass?
Jan 10, 2009 at 3:03 pm rating: 1
#30 a trivial mistake
[...] related: desperately seeking closure [...]
Feb 11, 2009 at 3:18 pm rating: 0
#31 thanks a lot
[...] related: desperately seeking closure [...]
Jun 2, 2009 at 9:09 pm rating: 0
#32 you can have the inflatable bananas
[...] related: desperately seeking closure [...]
Sep 28, 2009 at 9:15 pm rating: 0
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