…courtesy of the hapless young lads of north america.
as documented by kimberlee in lawrence, kansas:
and by grant in toronto, canada:
happy breakup season, everyone!
related: some dating advice
a little advice for the ladies
February 12th, 2009 · 100 comments
FILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · battle of the sexes · canada · kansas · kinda creepy · toronto
100 responses so far ↓
#1
Jinx
And just who ARE we supposed to abuse, reject and ignore? The old men who pay our rent? NOT!
And trust me, you do NOT want to see this fat sack in tight sweats!
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:18 am rating: +29
#2
r.m.
How am I to ignore and abuse you at the same time?
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:25 am rating: +40
#3
Enp
Wear miniskirts without panties, please
So I may lurk beneath you on the stairwell.
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:26 am rating: +5
#4
Canthz_B
Guys,
Stop writing skeevy notes on our clean, white, cinder block walls.
You’re creeping us the Hell out, you perverts!
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:30 am rating: +38
#5
lightspeed
Both clearly written by men who wouldn’t know what to look for underneath those miniskirts or what to do if not rejected.
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:32 am rating: +65
#6
Canthz_B
Someone clearly does not hold the “leave something to the imagination” belief, but I suspect he’s a tire-kicker.
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:36 am rating: +7
#7
lightspeed
Men – stop wearing skinny jeans, long hair and guyliner so you won’t look like a woman.
It slows us down from ignoring, rejecting and abusing you.
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:36 am rating: +70
#8
Canthz_B
If your best pick-up line is “If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?” or you have a face that could be a case-study in acne vulgaris, you deserve to be ignored, rejected and/or abused by young women.
Reminding you why you’re a virgin is their primary function in this world.
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:42 am rating: +14
#9
Cookieput
Yes, I second the call for a return to classic femininity. Tight sweat pants! Vag-flashes! You know, like Grace Kelly.
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:45 am rating: +52
#10
Canthz_B
I’ll bet our friend in Toronto would have goo-gobs of dates if he’d left out “abusing” and left his phone number or e-mail addy!
Feb 12, 2009 at 12:46 am rating: +3
#11
C
I have never seen anyone in “tight sweats” who looked slim. If one can fill out the baggy stylings of a sweatpant, one is not a hottie with a body.
Feb 12, 2009 at 8:00 am rating: +3
#12
Lorelie
Hallelujah! I am converted. I will immediately run out and buy an arm load of school-girl mini-skirts — to make it all the more painful when I ignore and reject you.
Feb 12, 2009 at 8:22 am rating: +23
#13
Lorelie
Sometimes young men like it when you abuse them.
“More please, Mistress.”
Feb 12, 2009 at 8:27 am rating: +11
#14
Ti O
Young Men-
Please quit whining about how girls don’t like “nice guys” and be a confident man. Also try wearing something that doesn’t reek like wet goat and attempt some personal hygiene like bathing. when you come out of the basement return your mom’s make up and get a job.
The Ladies of KSU
Feb 12, 2009 at 8:36 am rating: +42
#15
Mishee
That first note is actually posted in Britney’s dressing room.
Feb 12, 2009 at 10:20 am rating: +10
#16
you suck at craigslist
I only ignore, reject, and abuse people who ignore, reject, and abuse the Oxford comma.
Feb 12, 2009 at 10:42 am rating: +17
#17
Vic Torey-Paughn (nsfw)
Men! Learn to communicate face to face, rather than via anonymous notes, and we might stop abusing and rejecting you. We might even, if you’re really lucky, wear a mini skirt and no panties for you. No promises, mind you.
Feb 12, 2009 at 2:42 pm rating: +2
#18
claw71
Great! This site has an international audience which means people around the world are going to have the opportunity to contrast and compare the behavior of sexually frustrated males in the US and Canada.
Thanks to the burgeoning serial killer from Kansas, America just more class points in the eyes of the rest of the word. And after 8 years of DUHbya we didn’t have that many to burn.
Our friend to the north opted to skip committing the criminal act of vandalism in favor of posting his message on a plain white sheet of paper, neatly typed rather than angrily scrawled. More over, the Canadian lad offered up a sincere and thoughtful plea where as the moron from Lawrence was decidedly crude and more than a little creepy in communicating his demand.
After Obama was elected I felt pride that my country had finally turned a corner that the world had long given up hope that we’d reach. Today I’m sad to say that I’m once again hanging my head in shame and looking for my “Don’t behead me, I’m Canadian” T-shit.
Feb 12, 2009 at 3:16 pm rating: +20
#19
Bison
I hope that somebody is mounting a similar public information campaign to address a problem that I was recently apprised of in a men’s room stall at Barnes & Noble:
“American women are greed whores.” [sic]
Feb 12, 2009 at 3:42 pm rating: +2
#20
Male Chauvinist Pig
At last my efforts to educate the ladies are being recognized.
Feb 12, 2009 at 4:05 pm rating: +2
#21
mamason
Men,
Stop having small penii that can’t last more than 2 minutes and stop insinuating that women are whores because we expect you to have a J-O-B! And if you never sniffed your fingers again after scratching your balls, that would be lovely.
Feb 12, 2009 at 4:20 pm rating: +33
#22
Hod
There’s a long literary tradition of giving sound advice to ladies.
“Girls — Rub on yo’ titties.
Yeah, I said it: rub on yo’ titties!”
-Pharoahe Monch, Simon Says
Feb 12, 2009 at 4:44 pm rating: +5
#23
Julie
You can tell these guys are really young since they are still laboring under the delusion that women exist for their pleasure and are offended when they don’t live up to that expectation. I bet neither of them have even felt a boob before.
Feb 12, 2009 at 4:59 pm rating: +17
#24
fluffy8u
So that’s why I can’t get a man… And here I thought that my wonderful personality and millions of dollars were a turnoff! Silly me.
Feb 12, 2009 at 6:02 pm rating: +3
#25
L. G.
That’s funny, a lot of the men I know have grown out of that. They even view women as equal, thinking human beings.
I think some of the comments+ those two notes may just be written by brainless degenerates
Just sayin’!
Feb 12, 2009 at 6:09 pm rating: +7
#26
JoelWhy
“Wear tight sweats so you won’t look fat”
Unless you are fat, in which case, please wear manly jeans.
Feb 12, 2009 at 6:28 pm rating: +4
#27
XauriEL
Douchebags:
Stop telling ‘women’ to do things that make me not like them and make them not like themselves.
Stop telling ‘women’ to do things you’re not willing to stop doing yourselves.
Stop being douchebags.
Seriously. Just stop.
Feb 12, 2009 at 7:06 pm rating: +13
#28
Magick
I’ve never really gotten the stairwell-lurker thing.
I mean, who really wants to see a vagina?
Feb 12, 2009 at 9:22 pm rating: +3
#29
makelikeacouplet
This whole mini skirt/no panties concept bothers me. I mean, what if I’m on my period?
Then again, I guess that’s what the tight sweats option is there for …
Feb 12, 2009 at 11:48 pm rating: +6
#30
TheOldSchool
The first note appears to be a well-intentioned effort at offering today’s young women some frank, yet practical, dating ‘n’ mating advice.
The second one is both harrowing and haunting.
It is eerily reminiscent of an answer Bush would give to a reporter’s question.
Feb 12, 2009 at 11:52 pm rating: +2
#31
Napalm Nacey
Dear Guys,
CRY MOAR!!
Feb 13, 2009 at 4:06 am rating: +9
#32
Sekhmet
Dude. Speaking as somebody who’s been both rejected and ignored, and who’s been abused (as in could’ve pressed charges) all I can say is get some perspective, dude. Seriously. Nobody is violating your human rights by not dating you! (In fact, dating this guy would probably seriously undermine anybody’s right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness….)
Feb 13, 2009 at 2:12 pm rating: +10
#33
Cee
I wonder if that Grant in Toronto is the same one who dumped me via a one-line email. True story.
Feb 14, 2009 at 6:29 pm rating: 0
#34
calyx
Poor victim patriarchy! Delusional entitlement complex for the lose!
Feb 17, 2009 at 8:13 am rating: +4
#35
Danyell
Oh yes, we must stop teh mens from being abused!1! Clearly, men are constantly victimized by women! Surely being sexually rejected is the WORST thing someone could ever go through. Haven’t these boys suffered enough??
Feb 17, 2009 at 8:17 pm rating: +3
#36
masculine beast warrior
women: This is a stupid note. What men really want is you to show that you care about how you look. wearing makup, staying clean, getting your hair done nice and yes, eating right/exercising are all good ways to show men that you care about your appearence. Women who have just stopped caring will very much frustrate the men they are involved with. It makes us feel like you take our feelings for you for granted and don’t have to do anything to keep us.
Men: appearences fade fast. really fast. how many very attractive 30 year olds are there? not many. how many very attractive 20 year olds? a whole bunch. yes, attraction is important for sure (especially in the early stages) but personality is much more so.
Feb 19, 2009 at 10:17 am rating: +1
#37
Jasper von blowhole
Well… that should fix all the relationships in Toronto!
Feb 28, 2009 at 2:10 am rating: 0
#38
Matdredalia
Oh yes, because my DISABLED fat ass, really wants to run around wearing an uncomfortable ass mini-skirt while praying to GOD I don’t fall over so someone gets an eyeful of my PANTIELESS crotch?
Seriously, this is why feminism lives on. Because there are still douchebag males like this that think they have the right to tell the female contingency how the hell to live our lives. Assholes.
Mar 15, 2009 at 6:35 am rating: +1
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