Our anonymous submitter in Quebec says this note is posted on the door of an apartment in her building. “Looks like somebody had a rough breakup,” she speculates…in which case I think dude is probably better off.
Still, I think the ambiguity here presents a wealth of other possible scenarios, no?
related: and all the pieces matter
75 responses so far ↓
#1
r.m.
this is when you change the locks.
Mar 6, 2009 at 8:31 pm rating: 16
#2
Simple Simon
I hate when my land lord enters and fixes stuff when I’m not there to over see.
Mar 6, 2009 at 8:33 pm rating: 18
#3
Callisto
This person’s laziness knows no bounds. Would it hurt to get a new piece of paper instead of this upside-down photocopy of some guys?
Mar 6, 2009 at 8:59 pm rating: 13
#4
Canthz_B
I beg to differ. Possession of key of keys is second only to an invitation on the permission scale.
That’s like saying “Just because I bought you dinner, it doesn’t mean you can eat it”.
Mar 6, 2009 at 9:16 pm rating: 10
#5
Geek Goddess
Obviously what is happening here is a classic case of split personality. Note the upper case used for the first 8 letters, at which point personality number 2 takes over, using lower case. This is sad, very sad, a tormented soul desperately trying to evict that secondary personality from their life. Of course they have a key! The addressee and addressor are one and the same. My heart goes out to this person.
Also, top PAN points for use of very detailed version of ‘smiley’ face.
Mar 6, 2009 at 9:31 pm rating: 18
#6
Sirius
This is a reminder
That just because you say I can’t enter your apartment…
Mar 6, 2009 at 9:50 pm rating: 7
#7
QuarterRoy00
Just because you know how to speak english, doesn’t mean you should be writing it down for others to see!
Mar 6, 2009 at 10:03 pm rating: 10
#8
Griffen P.
That key was fucking delicious!
LolZ!!
ROFLM
Mar 6, 2009 at 11:17 pm rating: 2
#9
zenvelo
it’s extra PA in Quebec because it’s in English. it should be “garder mes yeux sur vous…”
Mar 7, 2009 at 12:23 am rating: 4
#10
Girl Friday
I like it when he enters my apt.
It makes me akey for more.
You know who you are, – Becauge.
The neigboor hoods watch – and I like it.
Mar 7, 2009 at 12:35 am rating: 5
#11
Thanks!
This girl needs a little blue pill so she can chill the hell out and find a clean sheet of paper and maybe take her time spelling, sheesh.
I also somehow feel that the neighborhood watch would advise calling a locksmith.
Mar 7, 2009 at 9:10 am rating: 2
#12
Janelle Holden
My favorite part of the note is the drawing of the face to represent “Neighborhood Watch”. Was that really necessary? It shows a real attention to detail that seems lacking in the other elements of the note.
Mar 7, 2009 at 2:32 pm rating: 1
#13
TP
Unfortunately, it DOES mean they can enter your apartment. SHOULD they? That is another thing altogether.
Perhaps changing the locks should be on her list of things to do.
Mar 7, 2009 at 4:52 pm rating: 4
#14
pope suburban
I had a roommate give her goddamn bum boyfriend a key, but my other (sane) roommate and I handled that by telling him to get out unless he was coming in with her. When he kept up, we sicced the landlord on him. All the results, none of the effort to create a Weighborhood Watch and wrestle paper out of the shredder halfway through.
Mar 7, 2009 at 8:52 pm rating: 5
#15
aaa
Is that a photo of a scrotum on that note?
Mar 7, 2009 at 10:52 pm rating: 1
#16
aaa
I’m guessing that this is a copy of a note that Crazy Note-Poster got after their last breakup and they’re putting it up as a way of projecting their own problems (psychoses?) on their ex.
Mar 7, 2009 at 10:56 pm rating: 1
#17
Neeners
I love neighborhood watch man! He looks strangely indifferent with one eyebrow raised and a straight line for a mouth as if to say, “I quite possibly could give a shit.”
Not sure but I think it says Weighborhood Watch which is like a division of Weight Watchers and Neighborhood Watch combined.
Which brings me to my next pointless observation on this pointless note , having a key does mean you can enter the apartment that’s why they make them.
Mar 8, 2009 at 1:18 am rating: 8
#18
RunBarbara
i dont give out keys, ever.
i guess i just love being broken and entered a bit too much.
Mar 8, 2009 at 3:38 pm rating: 3
#19
beesnest
What would be the point of giving him a key if he could only use it with her in the apartment or with her there? then he wouldn’t need a key. So he used it when she wasn’t there- that’s what it was for.
Mar 8, 2009 at 4:04 pm rating: 6
#20
Masha G.
Geez, even if you’re too lazy to change locks, there is no excuse for leaving a note on that unsightly half-piece of ripped paper. Just what kind of impression do you think that’s leaving?! I don’t even know what that’s a picture of. A cocoon wearing earrings in front of some tree branches? Bitch deserves whatever happens!
Mar 8, 2009 at 7:07 pm rating: 1
#21
claw71
Oh, I most certainly can enter your apartment. Even if I don’t have a key, which I don’t, I can easily coax the bolt out of the catch with a pocket knife. Then I can make myself comfortable in your dark, quiet apartment. And wait. Will you be stopping at the gym after work? Perhaps you’ll meet friends for drinks? It’s OK. I can wait. In the dark. All alone.
When I hear you fumbling for your keys at the door I can quickly, but quietly, move to your bedroom and stand behind the door. Ever so still. Ever so quiet. Waiting. Waiting for you to retire to the bedroom. You might talk on the phone or watch the evening news. Maybe you’ll read a few chapters from that Mary Higgins Clark book next to the couch. But eventually you’ll come to bed.
Of course you won’t see me. You won’t even know I’m there. At least not until that convenient little blade–the one that helped me enter your apartment– effortlessly slices through your skin and pierces your jugular. Oh yes. Yes I can.
Mar 9, 2009 at 9:40 am rating: 6
#22
Beth
I vote landlord not respecting the 24-hour non-emergency notice law (…at least, it’s the law in the two states I’ve lived in).
Mar 9, 2009 at 10:41 am rating: 2
#23
Bernd das Brot
I think this is just an extreme case of someone trying to use reverse psychology.
Mar 9, 2009 at 10:57 am rating: 5
#24
blake
The drawing is very passive aggressive. It’s not a smiley-face, but the artist showed restraint by not making the mouth a frown
Mar 9, 2009 at 11:05 am rating: 0
#25
GhostWriter
Note to Rihanna- I’m pretty sure this isn’t going to stop Chris Brown from coming in.
Mar 9, 2009 at 1:05 pm rating: 2
#26
aaa
Is it just me, or does Mr. Neighborhood Watch Face kinda look like a janky David Bowie?
Mar 9, 2009 at 1:56 pm rating: 0
#27
mike
I did not know that Burt was the poster child for neighberhood watch.
I wonder if ernie knows?
Mar 10, 2009 at 12:25 am rating: 0
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