Snaps for schadenfreude!

March 16th, 2009 · 98 comments

Facebook‘s new “I like this” feature doesn’t allow you to give “thumbs down” to your friends’ status updates or posted links — a boon to both the supportive, snap-cup-loving, kindergarten-teacher-types on your friends list and the die-hard passive-aggressives on your frenemies list!

Daniel fractured his arm in 3 places.

The even bigger “ouch”?

ouch.

related: Reason #784 why you should never list your relationship status in your facebook-profile
extra credit: STFU, Marrieds

FILED UNDER: breakup · Facebook · frenemies


98 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Monkeyspeaks

    im guessing so does tori

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:04 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   KatieMB bang

      She does now…

      Mar 17, 2009 at 6:42 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Woman on the Verge bang

    You, Lena, Zachary, and 4 others apparently beat the shit out of Daniel. It would have been more interesting if Daniel had said he liked it…

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:08 pm   rating: 34  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   Frankie bang

    OH SNAP!
    Facespace will never get away from the PAness that will forever plague it despite its best efforts to rid the site of any kind of hate mongering. People will always find a way to turn positivity into negativity.It’s just chemistry and it’s too much frickin fun!

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:13 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Mishee bang

      Oh snap?

      I see now who broke poor Daniel’s arm.

      Frankie! You should be ashamed.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 5:19 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   Frankie bang

      I am ass hammed Mishee… Every time your mom comes around that is…

      Mar 16, 2009 at 5:24 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   bullwinkle

      I agree, oh snap.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 5:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   Mishee bang

    This is why I don’t like Facebook.

    And why is kerry messing with my internal clock?

    Its Monday, not Friday dammit!

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:17 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Ti O

      This zeitgeist is making me doubt my very existence. Perhaps I am not here now at all but in the past at past Friday or in the future at future Friday. What difference does it make? we mean nothing… :razz:

      Mar 16, 2009 at 7:01 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Canthz_B bang

      It makes a lot of difference, last Friday wasn’t payday, this Friday is! :-P

      Mar 16, 2009 at 8:27 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   Ti O bang

      are they dangerous?
      No they are nihilists.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 9:47 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.4   Mark bang

      Nihilists! Fuck me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it’s an ethos.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 10:48 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.5   Canthz_B bang

      I think National Socialism was more of a pathos.

      Mar 21, 2009 at 3:30 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.6   Canthz_B bang

      WTF??? Big Brother??:

      “hold your horses, now: your comment is awaiting moderation. no need to repost — this just means something you said got the attention of our spam filter. “

      Mar 21, 2009 at 3:32 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Woman on the Verge bang

    So what feature do you use if you don’t give a crap about Daniel, Tori, or Miguel?

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:18 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   RandyinReno

      Easy: You have to like that someone else doesn’t give a crap.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 5:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   Mishee bang

      “Delete From Friend List”

      Mar 16, 2009 at 5:25 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   QuarterRoy00 bang

    Miguel is a freakin’ genius!

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:19 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   mustdestroyalltraces bang

    i’m glad miguel is pleased with his no doubt heart wrenching break up.

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:21 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   QuarterRoy00 bang

    Maybe everyone likes Daniel breaking his arm just so they could give him a hearty “Everything’s gonna be OK pal!” thumbs-up, not because they are happy his is in mortal pain.

    Everyone is so negative here….

    oh wait…

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:23 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Woman on the Verge bang

    I wonder if Miguel understands the new feature… or if he just likes a thumb up…

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:31 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Mishee bang

      Who doesn’t???

      Mar 16, 2009 at 5:37 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   Frankie bang

      If you like the thumbs up, agree by giving Frankie a thumbs up!

      It’s like Chris Brown asking the children to vote for him in the Kids Choice Awards, except Frankie’s not going to withdraw herself from this contest.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:10 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   Mishee bang

    This post reminded me of a FML I read earlier today:

    Today, I decided it would be pretty amusing to press the “Like” button on everyone’s status on Facebook without reading them just to get on peoples’ nerves. After re-reading them later, I found out one of them said “I MISS YOU SOO MUCH GRANDMOM. RIP”. I liked that her grandmother died. FML.

    Mar 16, 2009 at 5:47 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Resident Grammarian esq bang

      Grammarian likes this

      Mar 16, 2009 at 5:54 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   Frankie bang

      Today, I realize that you read the entire site didn’t you Mish… I’ve created a monster. FML

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:07 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   Mishee bang

      Every fucking entry for 136 pages.

      It only took me two days! Two WORK days.

      Hopefully I do not get fired. But it would be a nice change to be fired for a site that isn’t PAN for once!

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:10 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.4   Bunnee

      OK, I give. What’s FML? (I’m too old for Facebook or MySpace, so you have to explain it to me….*bones creaking and joints popping as I get up from the chair*)

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.5   Frankie bang

      http://www.fmylife.com

      There.

      I’ve just ruined two days of your life Bunnee.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:13 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.6   Mishee bang

      Maybe 3 days. Its up to 143 pages now.

      Don’t ask me how I know.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.7   QuarterRoy00 bang

      “The site you requested is blocked under the following categories: Profanity”

      Stupid work filters…

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.8   Bunnee

      That’s OK, my boss ruins it for 5 days a week, EVERY week (excluding holidays and vacations). I guess everyone’s trying to get there– it wouldn’t load. I’ll wait until I get home.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.9   Bunnee

      Oh crap, QR, I have stupid work filters, too! I was gonna’ try again before I left, but now I definitely will have to wait until I get home.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.10   Mishee bang

      QR – I wonder how they don’t know about the extensive usage of the word CUNT here on PAN.

      Oh well. Don’t knock it I suppose!

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:23 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.11   Bunnee

      Every time one of those messages comes up, (“The site you are trying to access has been blocked…) I get a little scared and close the window real fast, like that’s going to make a difference. Maybe I’ll only get fired a little bit.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:27 pm   rating: 33  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.12   QuarterRoy00 bang

      yah…this is fine, yet the Onion gets blocked too…

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.13   Bunnee

      You know what else I’ve always meant to ask? How do you italicize words within this box?

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:32 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.14   Mishee bang

      its hard to explain.

      Wade?!?!?!

      Mar 16, 2009 at 6:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.15   Ti O

      Apparently it is verboten to explain how to do this here. my comment was eaten!!

      GODZILLA!

      Mar 16, 2009 at 7:06 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.16   Woman on the Verge bang

      http://www.w3schools.com/tags/default.asp This has html codes. Use them to tag the text you want to format….

      Mar 16, 2009 at 7:13 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.17   Ti O bang

      Thanks WotV.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 7:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.18   anglophile bang

      *defies Heisa*

      <i>Your italicized words here.</i>

      Mar 16, 2009 at 8:08 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.19   Canthz_B bang

      Glo, you’re frightening me! How’d you do ↑ that?!

      Mar 16, 2009 at 8:38 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.20   Bunnee

      Thanks for all the info, ya’ll. I’ve been wanting to learn that for a long time. Now, I can be like all the cool kids! ;)

      Mar 16, 2009 at 9:12 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.21   anglophile bang

      My skillz, CB. Let me show you them.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 9:33 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.22   Woman on the Verge bang

      glo, I bow to your amazing magical powers.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 7:23 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   Nionix

    Give credit where credit is due, this is a screencap originally from cloudsthatlooklikethings.com. I know the blogger and I know the kid, he’s a dick who fell down some stairs.

    Mar 16, 2009 at 9:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Canthz_B bang

      We don’t care where they come from…just that they get here each and every day. ;-)

      Mar 16, 2009 at 10:40 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   Chinchillazilla

      WTF, I didn’t want this comment to go here, I wanted it at the bottom. Screw that, comment system.

      Mar 16, 2009 at 11:16 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.3   Canthz_B bang

      A good idea would be to type your comment in the handy-dandy box at the bottom.

      If you hit the edit button, you could have copied and pasted it.

      Look at the bright side, at least now you know how to add to a thread. That’s a valuable skill to have around here! :-)

      Mar 16, 2009 at 11:35 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.4   Mishee bang

      Listen to CB.

      He knows of what he speaks.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 1:33 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.5   MW

      Oh I see the comment popo is still at it!! Don’t you have a life, you fat fuck?

      Mar 17, 2009 at 2:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.6   Frankie bang

      Are you trying for low blows MW? It’s hard to tell since most of us here don’t speak retard.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 2:59 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.7   Frankie bang

      Oh by the way MW, while I’m sure CB appreciates your concern for his physical health it may be time to have your eyes checked. He’s quite skinny actually, but even if he weren’t it would not affect his life any. CB is happy as a clam in his skin. As are the rest of us. I truly takes a disturbed individual with absolutely no self worth to try and pick on others for their physical features. I’m sorry you have no self esteem, but carrying on like that isn’t going to diminish ours…

      Mar 17, 2009 at 3:08 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.8   MW

      Well I guess you don’t have to be fat to be a chubby-sympathizing, psychotic comment correcting loser man.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 3:45 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.9   PANU bang

      I just realized how much you resemble your gravatar, MW. Very appropriate choice. Well done.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 3:53 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.10   Frankie bang

      Just like you don’t have to have a fully functioning brain to post comments on this site. Here’s your gold star.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 3:55 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.11   Mishee bang

      Ok, now who let MW back in here again?

      Jeezy Creezy! I swear, I just can’t get a moments peace around this place!

      Mar 17, 2009 at 3:58 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.12   MW

      It’s hysterical how you guys assume that because I don’t kiss your ass like all the other pathetic helmet-wearing window-lickers in here I must have a deficient brain. Hey, whatever helps you sleep at night.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:09 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.13   Mishee bang

      No, we say you have a deficient brain because everything you type up seems to sound like it came from an already slow 5 year old who has been dropped on their head one too many times.

      That, and the smell.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:11 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.14   MW bang

      FAIL

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:17 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.15   Mishee bang

      Whew!

      I can’t compete with your quick wit and scathing retorts!

      I have been so humbled!

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:21 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.16   Frankie bang

      Mishee it’s not polite to make such faces at the disabled. They cannot help that they were born that way. I apologize MW. She just doesn’t know how to behave around you “special” kids.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:23 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.17   Mishee bang

      Well, sorry… I just thought MW was making faces at me so I retaliated.

      I didn’t realize she actually looked like that ALL the time!

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:26 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.18   MW bang

      Yes, Mishee, this is what people look like when they leave the house every now and then, exercise, practice personal hygiene and graduate from great schools. It’s so nice to meet you. It’s not everyday I get to converse with the non-special people.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:30 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.19   Frankie bang

      I feel super sorry for you MW. I really do.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:33 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.20   MW bang

      The feeling is mutual.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.21   Mishee bang

      Well, MW, don’t flatter yourself.

      We were talking about you.. not the baby that is your gravatar.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:38 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.22   Frankie bang

      I don’t think so MW.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:38 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.23   Canthz_B bang

      Sorry I missed MW, but I was out having a life while she was posting childish and pointless comments on the internet…for two hours.

      Anyway, I wasn’t correcting #11.2, rather I was giving helpful advice. I’m sure others may not have known they could easily edit and copy and paste their comments here.

      I’d call MW some names and such, but grade school is a long way in my past and I fear I’ve lost the knack for it.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 10:12 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.24   Canthz_B bang

      Hmm, childishly pointless, or pointlessly childish comments?

      Funny how folks love to hate me for stirring the occasional turd, but love to try to goad me into a turd-stir.

      MW, if you hate turd-stirring, by all means refrain from doing it yourself.
      At the very least, don’t pretend to hate the people caught up in the turd vortex you create…on purpose.

      Mar 18, 2009 at 1:44 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.25   Beanster bang

      * kisses ass of CB and Mishee while simultaneously licks windows, but at least does it because they are clever, not because they are beautiful man children like MW *

      Mar 21, 2009 at 5:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   Canthz_B bang

    I’m not too familiar with FB. Am I reading this right? Is Daniel the “You” that likes that his arm is broken in 3 places?
    He must really be enjoying his meds!

    Mar 16, 2009 at 10:33 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   NotClever

      “You” is whoever was logged on FB and took this screencap. I guess it could be Daniel, but I somehow doubt you are allowed to like your own posts.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 1:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.2   keddren

      You are, actually.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 3:13 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.3   Hod

      I am “you”?

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:01 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.4   Canthz_B bang

      Thanks! :-D

      Mar 17, 2009 at 10:14 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.5   park rose bang

      @12.3

      I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together

      Mar 17, 2009 at 11:52 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.6   Canthz_B bang

      …so happy together! (?)

      That’s PAN.com, park rose!! :-D

      Mar 18, 2009 at 1:33 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.7   mamason bang

      I’d bet that a lot of men like their own posts on a daily basis.

      Mar 19, 2009 at 1:26 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.8   Canthz_B bang

      Ah, I miss my salad days, with their solitary satisfactions!

      Mar 21, 2009 at 3:43 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Girl Friday

    Girl Friday has fractured her arm in three places.

    Mar 16, 2009 at 11:02 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Mishee bang

      And to that I plus your comment.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 1:34 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   Girl Friday

      Hooray! Mishee is my frienemy!

      I hold my friends close and my enemies closer. Wanna know how I hold my frienemies? -.o

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.3   Mishee bang

      Asshole to bellybutton?

      Cause I would be okay with that.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:05 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.4   Girl Friday

      Girl Friday and Mishee are now frienemies.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:09 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.5   Mark bang

      Mark likes this.

      Would you like a useless fish for your blue cove?
      Would you like a stupid plant for your imaginary garden?
      Mark has thrown a sheep at you using SuperPoke!
      Mark has taken a quiz, he is now the coolest person in the universe!
      Would you like to take 4 useless quizzes?
      Would you like to JoIn TeH VamPyER kLan?

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:15 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.6   Girl Friday

      Mark Superpoked Girl Friday and now they’re in a relationship.

      Mar 17, 2009 at 9:00 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   jered

    The closest I’ve been able to come to a thumbs up is “liking” something so that I can then have the satisfaction of “unliking” it.

    Mar 17, 2009 at 12:07 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Meesh

    Meesh likes Kerry’s use of the term schadenfreude.

    Mar 17, 2009 at 12:25 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   TheOldSchool

    How could anyone give a thumbs up to Daniel’s message without knowing which arm was fractured?

    If he’s right handed, and he fractured his right arm, the message would not only merit a “thumbs up,” but a “ROTFLMAO,” as well.

    If he’s right-handed, and he fractured his left arm, he’s just a cry baby who deserves to have his right arm slowly stuffed into an industrial-strength meat grinder for his cardinal faux pas.

    The moments of my life are too precious to waste on questions like, “Which arm?”

    Mar 17, 2009 at 1:33 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   GhostWriter bang

    I hope it was Daniel Stern.

    He really bugged me in “The Rookie”.

    Mar 17, 2009 at 3:59 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Mishee bang

      Daniel Day-Lewis annoys me more, as I see no reason for his last name to be hyphenated… and two middle names also? How ostentatious is that?

      Mar 17, 2009 at 4:01 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.2   mamason bang

      um… Mishee? :-? My little one has 2 middle names so I can answer that question by saying it is very ostentatious! I always address him in public using his full name with my jaw slightly clenched while doing a rather Madonna-esque phoney British accent. ;-)

      I say, it is rather amusing.

      Mar 19, 2009 at 1:36 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   adrien

    Miguel likes this ! hahaha OMG that’s awesome! Except that now I have to clean off the coffee I just spit on my keyboard!

    Mar 18, 2009 at 12:51 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   Stuff Queer People Need To Know

    The bottom Facebook relationship status is hilarious.

    Mar 23, 2009 at 1:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   lemon head

    wowza…how mean, if i were the girl and some guy said he liked that we broke up i would deffenitly delete him from my facebook

    Mar 24, 2009 at 8:28 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Rozy

    hahahahahahahahahahaahaahahhaah absolutely great, have thought about the dislike option haha absolutely necessary

    Apr 1, 2009 at 11:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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