(Thanks to Graham in Cambridge, Mass.)
related: I can has guilt trip?
extra credit: Pope’s Easter message mostly passive-aggressive guilt trip
The Easter Bunny is such a passive-aggressive little bugger
April 9th, 2009 · 96 comments
FILED UNDER: cleaning · fridge · holiday spirit · roommates
96 responses so far ↓
#1
JCole311
Thus the battle between Little Bunny Foo Foo and the Easter Bunny begins!
And it started with the refrigerator…
Apr 9, 2009 at 1:54 pm rating: 6
#2
urmom
Ironic that this person made a bigger mess in their request that the fridge be cleaned….
Apr 9, 2009 at 1:55 pm rating: 8
#3
The T word
Roger Rabbit was extremely bitter about how his Hollywood career ended. Unfortunately this bitterness showed itself on every job he had. The “Clean the Fridge” eggs never were big marketing hits.
Oooh but is that a SnakFinder 3000 below the eggs? Ooooooh
Apr 9, 2009 at 1:57 pm rating: 6
#4
Helena
Whoot Trader Joe’s Whoot!
Apr 9, 2009 at 1:59 pm rating: 0
#5
Mishee™
I don’t get it.
Why spend all the time hard boiling, using the white crayon, and mixing the egg dye to put a message on the eggs?
Just take the raw eggs and throw them at the lazy fuck who won’t clean the fridge!
Apr 9, 2009 at 2:03 pm rating: 47
#6
N/A
Someone shops at Trader Joes and Market Basket? Aren’t they kind of opposite ends of the grocery store continuum? I know I only go to Trader Joes when I’m feeling exceptionally frivolous and I only go to Market Basket when I feel like wading through filth and standing in line for 20 minutes to save 10 cents on a carton of soy milk.
Apr 9, 2009 at 2:15 pm rating: 4
#7
Woman on the Verge
Was the PA response “Fuck you!” written in jellybeans?
Apr 9, 2009 at 2:20 pm rating: 18
#8
claw71
I made up my mind a long time ago: The Easter Bunny is my Lord and Savior.
No offense to Jesus. He’s cool and you have to give him his props for turning water into wine, walking on water, healing lepers and all that cool shit, but Jesus hasn’t worked a miracle in a couple thousand years. Yeah, every once in a while his face will appear in a bowl of oatmeal but that’s a parlor trick compared to what the Easter Bunny does every single year. Now he’s taking people to task for sloppy refrigerators.
I worship the Easter Bunny because he loves me. This I know. The Easter Basket tells me so. Jesus doesn’t reward me for good behavior every spring. Jesus is holding out until after I die. That sounds like a sucker’s bet right there. Jesus supposedly died for my sins, but I’m still expected to behave myself or else I’ll go to hell and burn forever. That’s harsh.
The Easter Bunny isn’t so demanding. If I really fuck up he might pass on dropping off a basket but so far that hasn’t happened. The Easter Bunny is truly forgiving.
Even so, I fear the Bunny. How could you not? He’s fucking huge and he’s got outrageous powers. There are nearly 7 billlion people in the world and the Easter Bunny is able to sort through them and reward the 250 million of us who truly deserve. That’s big magic. If he decided to invoke his wrath we’d be screwed.
Jesus is also kind of rude. I can’t get past the whole “body of Christ” thing when you take communion. Communions are creepy even without the act of noshing on the Messiah with all the murmuring and whatnot. The way I see it, Jesus got ticked off at Peter, told him “eat me!” and the whole thing got twisted into this unsettling affair where we infect ourselves with Jesus. Sick.
The Easter Bunny never told anybody to eat him, even though we all know that bunnies taste a hell of a lot better than some scraggly, sandal-wearing hippie. Instead of being creepy, the Bunny provides us with delicious chocolate effigies that don’t symbolize the fact that we are munching on his immortal flesh, but rather serve to remind us that he loves us and wants us to be happy.
Obviously there is going to be an epic battle between Jesus and the Easter Bunny and I don’t want to get on the wrong side of that one. I’ve seen enough late night movies to know that giant rodents can kick some ass and I don’t think Jesus has got enough fight in him to fend off a pissed off Easter Bunny.
Apr 9, 2009 at 2:50 pm rating: 36
#9
GhostWriter
Wanna have some fun with the superstitious natives?
Rearrange the eggs so they say, “Please – The – Clean – Fridge.” They’ll be jamming virgins into the crisper by light of the full moon.
Apr 9, 2009 at 2:56 pm rating: 23
#10
MissBunny
Glad to see another frugal slob visiting my local Market Basket (or as my Nana called it…Demoula’s)
Go Northeast! Woo Hoo!!
Apr 9, 2009 at 3:18 pm rating: 0
#11
Shawn
New Product Idea – similar to the Magnetic Poetry or the candy hearts with little messages. You can buy a dozen eggs with pre-determined words silk screened on them and arrange them in the fridge. It has marketability.
Apr 9, 2009 at 3:21 pm rating: 4
#12
oh really
If they really wanted to get their point across, those would be uncooked just past their expiration date eggs, and they’d hide them around the non-fridge cleaner’s bedroom to be found and the message pieced together once all four eggs were located. What’s Easter without an egg hunt?
Apr 9, 2009 at 3:29 pm rating: 10
#13
nick
Is the orange juice on sale? If it is, I will run down and pick up several quarts to cram into my frig.
Apr 9, 2009 at 3:52 pm rating: 0
#14
Nikki
hahahahaha. One of my favorites in a long time.
Apr 9, 2009 at 4:22 pm rating: 3
#15
Reeses Lover Lover
Oh that reminds, me! I need to get stuffs for the Easter baskets. Thank you egg message in the fridge!
*hops ovah to Target while fridge waits to be cleaned*
Apr 9, 2009 at 4:35 pm rating: 2
#16
GK
The eggs aren’t actually painted. A clean-out has been badly needed there for… some time.
Apr 9, 2009 at 4:39 pm rating: 6
#17
tsel
Personal bias generally puts me right with Team Neater Roommate.
That being said, this is so clever it feels like it was done deliberately to end up on the blog.
Either way, I laughed my ass off.
Apr 9, 2009 at 5:03 pm rating: 3
#18
M
That’s an exceptional amount of time devoted to egg dyeing/decorating that could have easily been used to more productively clean the fridge or at least talk to their roommate. I’m picturing them going through the whole process of scheming and decorating, it’s got to be a long time.
Apr 9, 2009 at 6:37 pm rating: 3
#19
ohyeeeeah
Oh man.. That’s so great….
An artist lives in that household!
Apr 9, 2009 at 6:55 pm rating: 0
#20
JoelWhy
Still beats the more overtly aggressive version of this, where they spell the same message out with egg yolk on your mattress.
Apr 9, 2009 at 6:55 pm rating: 4
#21
Bernd das Brot
This fridge looks clean to me. A little crowded perhaps, but that could easily be solved by ohyeeeeah et al. who find virtually anything effin’ delicious.
Apr 9, 2009 at 7:22 pm rating: 3
#22
Geeky_cupcake
This is epic … such a good idea … wonder if its to late to pull this off with my roomate?
— just hope the eggs keep until he’s back after the long weekend
Apr 9, 2009 at 8:11 pm rating: 1
#23
Grimfool_Reluctant
There’s one blue egg still inside the carton . . . I’m betting it has “muthafucka” written on it.
Apr 9, 2009 at 8:15 pm rating: 10
#24
Canthz_B
Has the old clean the fridge argument been resurrected yet again? Just in time for Easter!
Apr 9, 2009 at 8:50 pm rating: 4
#25
Regina
Sharing an apartment with Martha Stewart must suck.
Apr 9, 2009 at 11:28 pm rating: 7
#26
raiseyourglass
What is a snak-finder? Does the fridge have GPS?
Apr 9, 2009 at 11:37 pm rating: 7
#27
Canthz_B
The person that left this left a really passive aggressive message in the order of the eggs.
Blue Orange Orange Blue……BOOB!!!
Apr 10, 2009 at 12:06 am rating: 8
#28
honeyedhemlock
Which came first, the Easter Bunny or the multicolored eggs?
Apr 10, 2009 at 11:02 am rating: 2
#29
TheOldSchool
T.G.I.G.F!
Wait a sec…. Hang on….
bbl
Apr 10, 2009 at 11:21 am rating: 2
#30
GhostWriter
Magical Fridge Monkey Eggs hatching instructions:
Congratulations on your purchase of Magical Fridge Monkey Eggs! Once hatched, these family-friendly pets will amuse and delight you with their magical actions and unerring devotion.
(1) Choose your Magical Fridge Monkey Eggs to hatch. Blue eggs are males; orange eggs are females. It is best to hatch them in male/female pairs if you would like to raise a family of Magical Fridge Monkeys.
(2) Important Note: Please remember to place the eggs outside of the delivery carton. This is a first-timer’s common mistake, and leads to catastrophe. Hatchling Magical Fridge Monkeys that are trapped in their delivery carton will metamorphosize into Demonic Fridge Lobsters, which feed on your gourmet coffee, fine cheeses and orange juice, and leave behind sticky tar-like droppings. They are very difficult to remove from your fridge. Be warned!
(3) The Magical Instructions: The best thing about Magical Fridge Monkeys is that you can easily train them via Magical Instructions. Simply write your instructions directly on the eggs, and when they hatch, the Magical Fridge Monkeys will perform whatever task you’ve instructed them to do. Planning a party? Ask them to fix you a cold-cut platter. Dirty fridge? Ask them to clean it! The fun is endless; we’ve had reports of happy owners feasting on a tasty meat loaf, when only pickles, Asian salad dressing, and a popy-seed bagel were in their fridge. Eat better and laugh all the way to the bank!
We guarantee you’ll fall in love with your Magical Fridge Monkeys. But if you don’t, just place an opened can of soda into your fridge for a night. The Magical Fridge Monkeys will somehow crawl inside it like a thirsty bee, and are unable to get out. Toss the can into your recycle bin, and no more worries!
Apr 10, 2009 at 11:50 am rating: 19
#31
Vince
The Easter Bunny has no soul. Easter is one of my favorite holidays. It’s another excuse to paint eggs, hide them, and dress up in a huge bunny suit which somehow earns you the adoration of young children. I made a list on my website of the top ten reasons I love about Easter: http://www.toptentopten.com/topten/reasons+i+love+easter. You can vote and also add your own reasons.
Apr 10, 2009 at 3:58 pm rating: 0
#32
ummmmheyyyy
I’d probably smash those within the fridge if I saw such a thing
Nothing better than the odor of old hard-boiled eggs first thing in the morning
Apr 11, 2009 at 11:02 am rating: 0
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