Entries from April 2009
“One of my coworkers — normally a calm, even-keeled woman — sits near the door of the office,” writes Ali in Minnesota. “When others come in at night to write reports or look up info, they apparently destroy her desk in the matter of minutes. After a series of coffee cups and chair-lowerings, up went this note. Everyone in the office found it so funny they started adding snarling animals to the note. Ferocious!”
While I can understand this woman’s frustration, one thing I’ll never be able to understand is the logic behind highlighting an entire (caps-locked!) message.
related: cubicle etiquette
Tags: CAPS LOCK · high on highlighter · Minnesota · not-so-veiled threats · office · stealing
I’ll admit, my first thought upon reading this note — found in the hallways of an American high school — was something along the lines of “Argh, kids today, with their chatspeak!” Can we all agree that adolescent girls are probably the most passive-aggressive creatures on earth?
related: 2 good 2 be 4gotten
Tags: birthday · frenemies · mean girls · schools & teachers
Alec in Houston found this little work of art on his desk, he says, “after I went out for lunch and didn’t do the dishes like they had asked.” With gritted teeth, he goes on: “They have ‘too much work’ and I have ‘none’ so I might as well wash them!”
related: Al Gore knows you drove when you could have taken your new bicycle
Tags: a little patronizing · dishes · Houston · office · thanks (but not really) · The Earth
Writes Tim in Berkeley: “Although this note is over 17 years old, I think it’s still worth submitting, at the very least as an example of notes from a bygone era. I received this note from the apartment manager when I was a senior at Rice University, living in an off-campus apartment. Admittedly, I wasn’t the cleanest tenant — but what 20-year-old college kid living alone in a studio apartment is?”
Adds Tim: “The really sad thing was that I had cleaned my apartment before this note — she should have seen the place before!”
related: be informed, homeland security will be
Tags: cleaning · college life · Houston · landlords and property managers · Texas · that's disgusting
Writes Kerry in Brooklyn: “I just moved into a new apartment, and they don’t have secured outside parking for bikes. My place is NYC-sized, so naturally I decided to lock one of my bikes to the banister right outside my door. Apparently that’s a big no-no in the building.”
Meanwhile, Melanie in Newport, Rhode Island spotted this on the lawn of the Salvation Army in her neighborhood, adding “I, for one, certainly applaud whomever had the baguettes to do such a thing.”
related: The first thing I did when I woke up
Tags: bicycle · bread · Brooklyn · food · neighbors
Writes our anonymous submitter: “Unable to visit my mother last year for Mother’s Day, my partner and I sent her a box of chocolate truffles and an antique brooch. This is her ‘thank you’ note (which is really more like a ‘fuck you’ note).”
The final “fuck you,” of course, is the nearly indecipherable handwriting. Here’s the transcription:
Looked forward to seeing you on Mother’s day. In Lieu of such optimism I enjoyed the truffles as fattening as they are + the pin is very attractive. Thanks. Love, Mom
related: I can has guilt trip?
Tags: Moms & Dads · Mother's Day · thanks (but not really)
Writes Joe in Van Nuys, California: “Dave has been upset because people have been drinking his tea. Apparently, he was unaware of other potential Daves in the office. Next time, maybe he should clarify?”
related: Who’s the smartass?
Tags: California · most popular notes of 2009 · office fridge · rebuttals · stealing · tea
What to do after you’ve already written your daily letters to the editor, congressman and the local weatherman and you’ve still got hours to go before the early bird buffet? Well, you turn to the classifieds!
related: Cloudy with a chance of hate mail
Tags: awk abbrev · comma diarrhea · excessive underlining · Houston · old folks · unsolicited feedback · You call that punctuation?