Writes our submitter in Harpers Ferry, West Virginia: “A local candidate for county commissioner claimed that he was going to run the county like he runs his businesses.” (You know: straight talk, no bullshit, that kind of thing.)
So, if you were a Jefferson County voter, what would be your take on the guy based on this sign, from the dumpster area at one of his rental properties? Destined for law-making, right?
related: What is about dog shit that pushes Brooklynites over the edge?
210 responses so far ↓
#1
Kelly
Frankly, I’m impressed that he didn’t use “Monday’s” or “you’re landlord.”
May 20, 2009 at 11:34 pm rating: 51
#2
Kat
That is sooo West Virginia.
May 20, 2009 at 11:35 pm rating: 4
#3
fluffy8u
Wait a minuet… Did someone throw out an ice cream bucket??
Do you what those could be for?! Pee buckets for those WOW players in California who peed on the mother’s fence!!!
Someone needs to start sharing…
Espeically Deborah.
May 20, 2009 at 11:49 pm rating: 8
#4
The Grammarphile
If that were my landlord, I’d make sure that my trash included a large amount of condom wrappers/condoms…it is the FUCKING trash, after all…
May 21, 2009 at 12:01 am rating: 17
#5
fluffy8u
Wait, so if that’s how he runs his business, is his county going to look trashy too?
May 21, 2009 at 12:13 am rating: 2
#6
atlriot
Wouldn’t this sign work better for its intended purpose without the salutation and valediction? This guy’s ego is clearly too large for West Virginia politics.
May 21, 2009 at 12:24 am rating: 2
#7
agatha christie
Wow. Just… wow. I like how there’s already one, smaller sign saying pretty much the same thing not two feet away from it.
May 21, 2009 at 12:31 am rating: 8
#8
racerx22
Obviously they couldn’t get the message from the first, smaller and more polite sign posted on the left. Using profanity as punctuation FUCKING works!
May 21, 2009 at 12:31 am rating: 3
#9
mew
really, I’m not keeping my trash in the house all week…get a friggin’ dumpster so it can be put outside where it belongs, k thx
May 21, 2009 at 12:31 am rating: 16
#10
racerx22
I will gladly put my trash out on Monday for a fixed fucking fence today. (Best Wimpy impersonation)
May 21, 2009 at 12:33 am rating: 19
#11
mamason
Is that even legal?
May 21, 2009 at 12:48 am rating: 1
#12
Canthz_B
They should be made to put it out more often.
Fucking trash breeds more trash.
In fact, HE should be made to put the fucking trash out of his apartments. The neighborhood has gone way down since he started renting to “those types”!
May 21, 2009 at 1:17 am rating: 4
#13
Canthz_B
So now we know what they did with John Brown’s body?
May 21, 2009 at 1:19 am rating: 1
#14
Canthz_B
They have to hold on to used condoms until Mondays?
I just flush mine, they can be used as evidence!
May 21, 2009 at 1:30 am rating: 1
#15
Canthz_B
This would be so much more acceptable if it ended with:
YOUR OVERLORD
May 21, 2009 at 1:35 am rating: 2
#16
Canthz_B
I think the bigger problem is that they can’t seem to make it all the way to the dumpster, no matter what day it happens to be!
May 21, 2009 at 1:42 am rating: 2
#17
Canthz_B
I happen to agree with the landlord…keep that whore for the whole weekend!
May 21, 2009 at 1:46 am rating: 3
#18
Canthz_B
Tourists:
So this is the famous Mason-Dixon line?
Tour Guide:
Yep. As you can see, the Southerners are still a little bitter about the outcome of the “War Between The States”.
They toss their trash in a general Northward direction each day.
Not too good at reading compasses, but we’re a-gonna restrict that activity to Mondays only from here on out.
May 21, 2009 at 1:57 am rating: 2
#19
fluffy8u
If Mr. Landlord has money to buy those personalized signs, why doesn’t he have enough money to hire a grounds keeper?
May 21, 2009 at 2:12 am rating: 1
#20
Rumblefish
Is this the same West Virginia that John “Fucking” Denver sang about?
May 21, 2009 at 7:12 am rating: 2
#21
Michelle
This has got to be one of my favorites!
May 21, 2009 at 9:16 am rating: 2
#22
amy d
Bright and warm in Harpers Ferry today.
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
Garbage accruing. Is it fucking Monday?
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
Sneak to the dumpster.Drop the trash.
I turn away in a flas.
It’s not Monday. I must dash.
Kill my landlord. Kill my landlord.
C-I-L-L my land lord!
May 21, 2009 at 9:43 am rating: 14
#23
MagPie
So, what if you’re leavin’ for a huntin’ trip wit pa and Bobby Joe an’ yer fixin’ ta be gone a spell? Don’ wanna miss that thar trash man!
May 21, 2009 at 9:57 am rating: 2
#24
Mishee™
This was an actual conversation between my BFF and her little brother, who lives in Harper’s Ferry, WV.
(*Note: neither of them had ever seen Google Earth before I pulled it up on my computer one day to punch in his address so she could see his house)
Sadie: OMG, you live near some creepy looking woods! And what’s that lot with all those cars next to your house??
Shane: Oh, that’s the junkyard.
Sadie: You live next door to a junkyard?! Well, I guess you don’t have to go far to get parts for your car then, huh?
Shane: Oh no! I wouldn’t go to that junkyard! I go to the good junkyard across town..
Sadie: You have a good and a bad junkyard?
Shane: Yep.
May 21, 2009 at 10:22 am rating: 10
#25
claw71
I’m very familiar with West Virginia and I’m here to tell you that Harpers Ferry is not representative of the rest of the state. The entire eastern panhandle is essentially a bedroom community to the movers and shakers who work in Washington DC. The cost of living is much higher than anywhere else in the state and you will notice a huge contrast in culture.
That sign is very East Coast. You’d expect that sort of thing in New York, Boston or DC but try pulling that shit in Charleston or Summersville and you’re going to receive a visit from the local po-po.
Moreover, most landlords in the rest of West Virginia wouldn’t be too upset over finding garbage strewn about their property. In some places, like Grafton for example, they’d think you were weird if you didn’t dispose of household waste by simply chucking it out the nearest winder.
May 21, 2009 at 10:25 am rating: 4
#26
B Rad
Fucking trash goes out on Monday, regular trash goes out on Tuesday!
May 21, 2009 at 11:13 am rating: 7
#27
N/A
I’d take it down and stick it in the trash. Drives me crazy when people post signs with that kind of language, it’s just so tacky. I know, it’s a total mom thing to do but hey, if his mom had raised him right I wouldn’t have to do it for her
May 21, 2009 at 11:17 am rating: 1
#28
claw71
Now here’s a little story ’bout a guy named Dean
A Harper’s Ferry landlord who couldn’t keep his rentals clean
He posted up a sign that was sort of rude
but he was sick of walking in half-eaten rotten food
trash that is….refuse ,ya see
Next thing you know old Dean’s a PAN-brity
and his plight is the subject of another parody
if only his sign hadn’t used the word fuck
we wouldn’t be laughing at his run of bad luck
May 21, 2009 at 11:44 am rating: 10
#29
Marklar
Really, doesn’t this violate obscenity laws or something?
May 21, 2009 at 12:15 pm rating: 1
#30
Resident Grammarian esq
I want to move to West Virginia just to vote for that guy, then leave.
May 21, 2009 at 12:52 pm rating: 6
#31
oi!
To my renters:
throw your fucking trash in a fucking pile near broken fence. I fucking promised to fix it but then you will be fucking confused about where to litter, given that you already are fucking confused about day of littering!
Your landlord
May 21, 2009 at 1:03 pm rating: 10
#32
Eric
Depends on which Jefferson County I’m voting in…
Is it the one named after Thomas Jefferson, Jefferson Davis, Jefferson D’Arcy or George & Weezie?
Oh… and of course how many $2 bills he’s handing out. Unless of course he’s spendin em on fucking trash!
May 21, 2009 at 1:11 pm rating: 2
#33
se
If it’s Tuesday when I catch my wife in the bedroom with her boyfriend, I have to wait until the following Monday to throw them out?
How is that fair?
May 21, 2009 at 3:39 pm rating: 4
#34
Tabitha
I would totally vote for this guy!
May 21, 2009 at 5:08 pm rating: 1
#35
Sirius¤
I’m going to run the county like I run my businesses: straight talk, no bullshit — but some fucking. Oh yes, there will be fucking.
May 21, 2009 at 6:53 pm rating: 9
#36
Diane
I would put my trash out on Monday, right after the garbage truck pulled away. There’s rarely (never say never, right?) a reason to treat your customers like that, especially once the originally offending party moves away. It only begs people to do the opposite.
May 21, 2009 at 11:17 pm rating: 1
#37
TP
Hoorah for spelling and grammar. I like a man that is straight and to the point. He has my vote (even though I live fah, fah away).
May 22, 2009 at 1:44 am rating: 0
#38
claw71
This one goes out to the ones who rent
this one goes out to those who left trash behind
It’s Monday–fuck– that’s collection time
this one goes out to the ones who rent.
May 22, 2009 at 8:42 am rating: 4
#39
KoT
Gee, what a novel idea … FOLLOW THE FUCKING RULES! He’d have my vote, but I live in CA where the liberals live without rules and the conservatives end up paying for their mistakes!
May 23, 2009 at 1:09 pm rating: 1
#40
Canthz_B
To my renters, please don’t rent me next month.
I need a fucking break!
May 25, 2009 at 6:23 am rating: 0
#41
Robert
Thanks, keep bringing the funny! Reposted at : http://iamhilarious.com/xoxo-your-landlord/
May 27, 2009 at 9:54 am rating: 0
#42
Fog Media
I love that this guy paid to have a metal sign made to express his message.
May 28, 2009 at 7:14 pm rating: 0
#43 Meanwhile, on the Internet… [ ALIS.ME ]
[...] Circle LensesPretty funny ads made by Acuve Contacts for– Well, click and you'll see.xoxo, your landlordWhen I'm a landlord I'm totally going to put up big, professionally-made signs with swearing [...]
Nov 13, 2011 at 3:17 pm rating: 0
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