Writes Linda in Austin, Texas: “This note popped up a few months ago on my downstairs neighbor’s door, but I didn’t take a look at it until now.” But how much longer will it be before she garners an invite from this gracious host?
related: why you don’t want to go to b-school, in two words
156 responses so far ↓
#1
Wade
But as for the girls room, anything goes.
May 22, 2009 at 8:51 am rating: 40
#2
TheMiki
Haha, I love how when there are no comments this site specifically urges you to refrain from posting ‘first.’ Now that I know that I find the people that do it even more sad and pathetic.
Someone should tell the note writer that exclamation points are for emphasis, and putting one at the end of every single sentence kinda defeats the purpose. Also, why does most of the note display decent English and then the rule about the bathroom look like it was written by a foreign language student translating directly through Babelfish.com?
May 22, 2009 at 8:54 am rating: 2
#3
Sheila
lol – so many !!!
May 22, 2009 at 8:56 am rating: 2
#4
Mishee™
I would’ve loved to find the .doc file in her computer and “Find/Replace” the word Home with Pussy…
May 22, 2009 at 8:58 am rating: 32
#5
Wade
I like how the imperial “we” creeps into the home reference at the end of the note.
May 22, 2009 at 9:01 am rating: 7
#6
Canthz_B
You are welcome to our home, but not inside it, my friends.
May 22, 2009 at 9:03 am rating: 12
#7
Canthz_B
Sounds like it was written by an “Odessa” participant to me.
May 22, 2009 at 9:06 am rating: 2
#8
fantasy
If you happen to have had a teenage boy, that pretty much cancels out being gracious.
If the “boys” are older than twenty the note should be just a heads up to “I will be a bitch, so don’t let me have to look at you in the morning”.
May 22, 2009 at 9:08 am rating: 5
#9
Canthz_B
I hope these kids have their papers in order before they visit the boys!
May 22, 2009 at 9:15 am rating: 2
#10
maggie
sounds like she is fed up with stupid kids. i dont blame her.
May 22, 2009 at 9:17 am rating: 4
#11
Mishee™
Ever notice that since Bush went home, there has been an influx of PAN submissions from Texas? Namely Austin….
Just makes me wonder…
Either that or kerry has been doing some serious networking in her new city of residence…
May 22, 2009 at 9:17 am rating: 4
#12
claw71
But you have it all wrong. I most certainly do respect your home. I respect it more than you could possibly know. It’s you I don’t respect.
May 22, 2009 at 9:21 am rating: 15
#13
zenvelo
so Mom says whatever goes on is okay as long as we clean up- but the landlord said only put out the fucking trash on Mondays.
what is a boy to do with all those used condoms over the weekend????
May 22, 2009 at 9:42 am rating: 7
#14
EyeHeartA2
Austin Texas……The epicenter of PAN.
May 22, 2009 at 9:52 am rating: 2
#15
Wade
Anyone else think it’s weird that an apartment would have a men’s (and presumably women’s) restroom?
May 22, 2009 at 9:54 am rating: 3
#16
Evil Homer
Your know, I don’t really think we’re are welcome in you’re home.
May 22, 2009 at 9:56 am rating: 16
#17
amy d
You’ve already told me I must go home by 10 p.m., therefore I obviously “don’t belong” in your home, therefore I don’t have to respect your home.
*pees on floor*
May 22, 2009 at 10:01 am rating: 9
#18
Beth
I need to post that on the front door of our house. I can totally understand the sentiments (if not the English used to express them), especially since our house apparently has absolutely no sound-proofing. I can’t tell you how special it is to be woken up at 2am to the sound of somebody in the bathroom peeing.
May 22, 2009 at 10:26 am rating: 2
#19
Flaboy2425
Her kid can hardly wait until he turns 18 and can get away from mom’s endless bitching.. No fun, no eating, no watching the late show. What is a kid to do?
May 22, 2009 at 10:59 am rating: 2
#20
claw71
I’m really nervous about what kind of kids the author is raising. This is the sort of thing you address with your kids. The standing rule my parents had for us was that we were accountable for our guests. If Tom Boiarski dumped a five gallon bucket of green army guys all over my room and left, I had to clean it up. If Chad Fernandez ate my dad’s roast beef sandwich I had to make him another one. If Chuck Taylor got my sister pregnant I had to abort the baby, or marry her.
Her kids are the ones inviting the assholes in. Deal with them. Damn, I’m glad I sold my kids to those Pakistani guys.
May 22, 2009 at 11:19 am rating: 16
#21
SuperMe
TRANSLATION:
Hookers Wanted!
You are here to do a service!
No overtime. Your shift is over by 10pm!
You can’t turn a ho into a housewife, so quit trying to make yourself at home!
Don’t interrupt someone else’s good time, and bring your own damned whipped cream.
Keep it kinky, but don’t make it stinky! If you can’t handle this, there’s always the Bunny Ranch!
May 22, 2009 at 11:38 am rating: 10
#22
DearJane
“You are welcome to our home” does that mean we can take it?
May 22, 2009 at 11:44 am rating: 2
#23
ClearlyDemented
DRINKING GAME:
Have someone read above note in a robot voice. Every time they say the word ‘home’ take a shot/swig. Rotate readers as necessary.
You’re welcome
May 22, 2009 at 12:24 pm rating: 4
#24
Indy Grrrl
Hahaha! Caps lock always makes me laugh. It means the writer is SERIOUS! ; )
May 22, 2009 at 12:40 pm rating: 4
#25
leftfoot
Apparently she’s read “How to Lose Friends and Influence Enemies”.
May 22, 2009 at 1:00 pm rating: 4
#26
TheOldSchool
Good News!
I’ve got a new job! I’m the “thumb fairy.”
Once a day, I’ll magically appear and give a thumb up to anyone who doesn’t yet have one.
Because, to me, you’re all great!
May 22, 2009 at 1:19 pm rating: 13
#27
msims
Sounds like a parent fed up with their son’s friends.
May 22, 2009 at 1:58 pm rating: 1
#28
oi!
You are welcome in our home!
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
blah
.
.
.
.
.
NOT!
May 22, 2009 at 2:05 pm rating: 11
#29
anglophobe
I’ve left notes like this, but not for kids. My BF brings his freinds over and they act like it’s a frat party. 45 years old and he’s funnel Natty Light. WTF? Then I catch him in bed with the neighbor’s daughter. She’s young, but she’s morbidly obese and sleeps with anybody for validation.
It gets out of hand everytime. One time he passed out and two of his s0-called friends snuck into my room and had their way with me. It was horrible. Two big sweaty guys, covered in body hair, Cheetos dust and English Leather aftershave. One of them leaned over and puked on my slippers halfway through.
So I put up signs. I don’t mind them disrespecting me, but I hate having to clean up after them.
May 22, 2009 at 3:56 pm rating: 3
#30
WillBraden
“your are welcome to our home”
how is anyone thinking this could be a native english speaker? I call shenanigans…
May 23, 2009 at 2:55 am rating: 0
#31
Canthz_B
There will be no more sleeping over?
Does that mean they have to sleep in the basement from now on?
May 25, 2009 at 6:45 am rating: 1
#32
Woman on the Verge
I’m pretty sure the note writer is using a different dictionary than the rest of us… Welcome = do not enter + do not eat + do not sleep + do not make a mess?
Huh. Sounds like my mother-in-law’s house…
May 25, 2009 at 11:56 am rating: 1
#33 thanks for not asking
[...] related: your are welcome to our home [...]
Jun 29, 2009 at 11:06 pm rating: 0
#34 What happens when you push “Minnesota Nice” one muddy step too far? | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com
[...] Your are welcome to our home [...]
Nov 14, 2010 at 8:09 pm rating: 0
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